Summary:
'He felt that he was not really honest with himself. If he could completely forget about Cersei for a few minutes, he would be able to judge the situation objectively.'
or
After Brienne saves a stray dog, Jaime learns something new about her, and about his own feelings.
Disclaimer: I do not own Game of Thrones
Lucky Dog
The weather has changed rapidly. It was warm now. Warm enough to be stuffy in the small room they sat in.
The presence of their new, stinky companion didn't make it much better. Brienne's new companion, to be precise.
It was a dog, probably white, but it looked gray with all the dirt in it's fur. She saved it yesterday from drowning in a cold river.
Jamie stood up to open a small, shabby window.
As he passed by, otherwise sluggish animal growled at him.
"Shhh… Keep quiet." Brienne admonished and lifted it from the floor.
Jaime sat back down and looked at the small dog on Brienne's lap. It was almost dead from starvation.
Brienne stroked its head gently while feeding it with small bits of meat.
It was remarkable how gently she handled the animal.
"What are you staring at?"
Was he really staring?
"It's going to die. You should have left it there." He said.
"It looks so stiff, like it could die any minute. Can't you see it is sick?"
"If you would have been starving for days, you would behave the way she does."
"So it's a she."
The dog didn't look like a female. It had no grace, no beauty. It's tangled fur was probably full of fleas.
"What made you so protective all of a sudden?"
He never saw her being so protective over a human before. Perhaps except for ladies Stark.
Hearing no reply, Jaime continued.
"Perhaps I shouldn't be surprised. You, women, do have soft hearts."
Brienne send him an offended look.
"Saving her has nothing to do with my gender. A true knight would not abandon a creature in need, human or animal."
Jaime looked away.
"It doesn't matter. Your efforts are pointless, she will die anyway. I only hope it will happen before she transmits any disease to us."
Brienne put the dog down and stood up herself.
"We will see. If you are so bothered by her, perhaps you should go to your room already."
They occupied two rooms in the inn. Brienne was supposed to sleep in the one with door opening onto corridor. Second room, which could be entered only through the first, was Jaime's.
Reluctantly, he got up.
"Good night, Lady Brienne."
Right after coming into the moonlit room, he sat on a creaking bed and pulled a bottle from underneath it.
He took a considerable sip of a fiery liquid.
A quick thought came to his mind. Even if the dog was going to die, it was lucky. Luckier than him, at least. It could stay in the room with Brienne. Suddenly he felt that it would have been so much better if they had to share just one room.
He paused for a minute, looking at the dark bottle in his hands. No, he didn't drink a lot. And there wasn't enough time for alcohol to kick in.
So where did those thoughts come from?
He loved Cersei, and will soon be with her, and then he will forget about Brienne. He will not remember her at all.
Interestingly, it was in Brienne's company he seemed to think about his sister less frequently. Not that he forgot about her, but let himself have his own wants, aside from making her happy.
He felt that he was not really honest with himself. If he could completely forget about Cersei for a few minutes, he would be able to judge the situation objectively.
Forget about her just for a few minutes…
His gaze wandered to the bottle in his hands. He took another sip.
After a few minutes, he was lying down on the semi-clean bedsheet, staring at the ceiling.
He couldn't completely forget his sister. But she was far away. Like a distant memory, covered in dust in some remote corners of his memory.
And right behind the door, there was a woman to whom he was attracted, and he could no longer deny that.
But as much as he wanted, he wouldn't go to her, because that wasn't what she would like. It could only be a fling, short-lived affair. He couldn't give her true commitment, which she certainly deserved.
Nonetheless, he had to use all of his willpower to remain in bed and sleep.
