AN: Three notes before getting to the story.
This fanfic is based upon a specific premise, one 'headcanon' of mine if you like. I have found out that this idea placed some of the characters in behaviours that might be considered borderline, very close to being straight OOC. While I did my best to avoid this and make everything plausible, I think it's better to warn you about it.
I chose the names for every one of the Delightful Children arbitrary. One of them comes from the show itself and is obviously canon, others have been based on information taken from other sources and at least one is entirely based on the, supposedly, fandom's most popular choice. All in all, I want to say that these are just my choices for the fanfiction. If you find the names to be erroneous or different from the ones you think or believe are theirs, I'm sorry. Try to think of them as a simple personal view of mine.
Last but not least: this is not a Sector Z story. And by that, I mean that Sector Z, despite being referenced, will not play a major role in the plot.
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Now Loading: Kids Next Door mission…
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Operation:
B.O.N.D.
Bothersome Opponents Now Dangerous
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Chapter 1
The Delightful Children
The sun slowly descended behind the horizon and, at the same time, the darkness began to substitute the light in the surroundings of Sector V's treehouse.
Usually, when the day made its way to the evening, the operatives reunited after the dinners with their respective families to spend some time together in recreation, right before going to bed. To be precise, this applied to Numbuhs Two to Five, since right now Numbuh One was doing something far different from relaxing.
The leader of Sector V didn't mind working while his squad members had fun by themselves. To be honest, right now he was busy with something that did not have to do with a future mission or an order sent by Global Command, so it was debatable whether what he was doing was 'work'. What Numbuh One was currently immersed in was an original idea of his own.
He had not chosen a specific name for it yet, and thus the kid normally referred to it with a generic 'Villain Encyclopaedia'. It was a list of villains and foes the Kids Next Door had fought throughout the years, both ones Numbuh One had faced himself and ones from the past, with a description as much detailed as possible of every one of them. Powers, weaknesses, character, anything that could help future operatives while taking on the enemies of the organization.
Numbuh One was, more particularly, putting the finishing touches to the article referring to a villain he and his friends knew very well. Their arch-nemesis… the five of them.
The Delightful Children from Down the Lane.
He hummed and put the pen aside for a moment. The Delightfuls… the five evil kids Sector V had fought against for so long… had it been two years since they first encountered the perfects? Maybe even three? Numbuh One wasn't so sure.
Writing the part about their tactics was easy, really. The bald kid knew everything about the Delightful Children: a very long list of various attacks and strategies filled something like forty pages of the first draft. What was more difficult for Numbuh One was describing their character and behaviour. They were the Delightful Children, all right… made to be perfect to the eyes of Father, the kid-archetype every adult longed for… at least according to the ideas of their guardian. But apart from the generic villain monologues and the fact they were evil… they didn't have a real behaviour, one that defined them. Actually, the absence of it defined them.
Numbuh One knew about the Delightfulization process and what had happened to the five legendary operatives of Sector Z, the same ones who had helped him when Grandfather rose to power again. He had personally witnessed to the transformation to and from the two groups. Yet, he had doubts… was Sector Z really gone from the Delightfuls' minds? Was the coordination fact a result of the process or something deeper than that? Was it linked with them being enemies of the Kids Next Door or was that a further evolution of the influence of Father?
Numbuh One was positive that if he'd asked those questions to his friends, they would probably have suggested him to go to sleep. And maybe they're right… I'm digressing. Is this really important to know for the future operatives? The Delightfuls are more than an exception rather the ordinance, after all. I've already talked about their features as enemies… those should be enough for them, as enemies who have no distinct trait or oddity.
Nigel Uno had made his decision and he would have proceeded with Chester if it wasn't for the sudden alarm that rang throughout the entire treehouse.
WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
He didn't waste time. He was already moving when the intercoms stopped the initial alarm and began to ring a series of sounds with a precise rhythm. As Sector leader, Numbuh One knew about every security protocol and it wasn't difficult for him to decipher the sound code. Attack. Someone's attacking the treehouse!
He put himself over the wooden pavement and, a moment after, he slid down a hidden tunnel. Exactly twenty seconds later, Numbuh One landed right in the centre of Sector V's briefing room, right over the podium. From his position, he checked and was satisfied to see all the four operatives of his sector right in front of him, ready for action.
They didn't even have time for greetings as the computer's voice began its monotone report. "Data analysis of Alarm #4521, categorized 'Attack report'. A possibly hostile entity has been detected and is nearing the treehouse at fast speed. The entity is a vehicle with no offensive capabilities detectable as of now, categorized 'dropship'. Estimated time of arrival: eight minutes."
Eight minutes? Numbuh One wasn't expecting this ETA. We always barely have the time to prepare when they send an attack towards us, and now we know it way before they arrive?
"Thermic analysis estimates number of occupants to five…" the computer added.
"Five? Let me guess, it's the Delightfuls, aren't they?" Numbuh Two reckoned.
"About time! 'Thought the dorks had surrendered for good, they haven't showed up for what, a month?" Numbuh Four said.
"Yah. Numbuh Five doesn't even remember seeing them in school this week," Numbuh Five said, "and if it's them in that dropship it's safe to say they're not sick."
Numbuh One nodded. "Whatever they've been planning it must be big. But even if it isn't, we should stay vigilant."
"Numbuh One, what about-" Numbuh Three wanted to know if the hamsters who gave power to the treehouse were safe from harm but she was cut off.
"ALARM!" the computer voice interjected, "Entity has remarkably modified its speed. New estimated time of arrival is-"
The operatives fell on the ground as a quake went through the frame of the treehouse and something was heard crashing.
"-minus two seconds." the computer finished.
"Wow, thank you very much!" Numbuh Four commented, not amused, before getting up.
"Leave the sarcasm for later, Numbuh Four! We don't want to leave our guests without a proper welcome party, do we? Everybody on the move!" Numbuh One ordered. And the four kids immediately obeyed the order.
Nigel went into a hallway and ran as the computer's voice continued its report, using the speakers fixed on the sidewalls to communicate with the running operatives. "The treehouse detectors confirm the presence of five individuals in the dropship. Crashing zone: level three, secondary hangar."
Numbuh One made some fast calculations in his mind and immediately took a turn. Behind him he heard footsteps and he watched his back for a moment to see Numbuh Four and Three following him.
He redirected his gaze forward and the three of them sprinted into the hallway and down a level of stairs, when suddenly a portion of the wall to their right literally swung out, revealing an entire armoury set of 2x4 gadgets.
While Numbuh One never separated himself from at least one SPICER gun, he didn't want to take any chances and picked up a SCAMPP rifle. Numbuh Three and Four followed his example even if the latter carried a MUSKET as well, and soon the trio of kids was again on the move with the three barrels of their weapons ready to fire.
"Numbuh One, what do you think the Delightful Children are up to?" Numbuh Three asked.
"Apart from defeating us for good? I'm almost sure this is no regular attack, Numbuh Three. They have stayed low for too much time for comfort… and that's why we're going to be cautious about it. Clear?"
"Yep! Don't worry, I'm sure we'll get them as we always do!" Numbuh Three replied happily, to which Numbuh One could only smile. How Kuki managed to always be cheerful continued to baffle him.
He had to admit, though, that he shared to an extent her thoughts. The Delightful Children were the Delightful Children… and he had lost count of how many times they had beaten them. Today's not going to be an exception… we'll just need to be ready, and we'll send the five dorks back to Father!
They spent two additional minutes running before they reached the secondary hangar. They were greeted by a huge cloud of smoke when they hastily burst into the chamber.
The three kids immediately started to cough. "*COUGH!* What the heck, I can't breathe! *COUGH!*" Numbuh Four complained as he tried to protect his nostrils from the dust.
"Don't worry, guys, help is on the way!" the voice of Numbuh Two came, followed right after by Numbuh Five yelling, "Numbuh Two, wait! GUYS, TAKE COVER!"
Nigel, Kuki and Wallabee immediately dropped themselves on the ground and grabbed the nearest heavy object that was available. Numbuh One could only hear two *click* noises before whatever devilish machinery Hoagie was going to use turned itself on.
A vacuum cleaner sound was heard. Followed right after by a typhoon-grade suction wind. The three kids in the hangar found themselves being lifted from the ground and they held on what they were keeping in their hands for dear life as the smoke cloud was literally cancelled in a few moments.
"NUMBUH TWO! STOP THAT THING NOW!" Nigel bellowed. Eventually the wind disappeared, letting the three of them fall. Numbuh Four started to kiss the floor while Numbuh Three tried her best to reorder the hair that was all over her face, but Numbuh One immediately stood up to greet the two remaining operatives.
Numbuh Five and Two joined them shortly after, coming from the same hallway the three of them had come from. Hoagie was holding was looked somewhat like… a vacuum cleaner, not surprisingly. The surprising feature was the fact that the operative easily kept the machine with his hands, holding it like a rifle. The only object of remarkable size was the giant dust bag behind Hoagie.
"What's the big idea, Numbuh Two?! Were you trying to suck us into that thing as well?!" Numbuh One roared.
"I don't know what you're talking about. I was helping you clean up the dust all over the place, you know!"
"You could have at least told us about your little plan before you went on with it!"
"Oh, okay, okay. Sheesh, talk about gratitude…" Numbuh Two muttered, putting the 2x4 vacuum cleaner on the ground. Numbuh Five wasn't amused by the chubby boy's behaviour either, but she kept silent.
Nigel turned around and for the moment forgot about Hoagie's overpowered invention. "Forget about it. We have other matters to deal with. Squad, in formation!"
Abigail and Hoagie positioned themselves by Nigel's right side, while Kuki and Wallabee moved to his left side. When the wedge-like formation was completed, Nigel made a signal and the operatives moved together into the central part of the hangar, which wasn't small despite it being a secondary one. There were even some abandoned vehicles around, partially scrapped or simply forgotten.
They walked through the scrapyard of sorts and finally found themselves facing the sidewall of the hangar that separated the room from the outside. This wall was automated and, in case of need, could be commanded to open, but right now that was not needed since the dropship had literally torn into it. There was a huge hole in the wall, and about forty meters away from the damage lied the small transport vehicle, which looked unscathed save for the fuming back motors.
Sector V continued to move and stopped only thirty meters or so away from the wreck. They waited quietly (well, that was true for everyone except for Wallabee, who soon began to tap one of his feet to the ground impatiently) for the occupants of the dropship to reveal themselves.
At last, a hatch opened on the side of the ship. And, slowly enough, the five invaders exited from it and faced the Kids Next Door.
The five operatives immediately raised their weapons when they finally saw the Delightful Children's faces.
"Hello, Kids Next Door," the Delightfuls began with their usual monotone, coordinated voice. At first sight, not much had changed in them, except for their way of clothing. Gone were the formal blue suits for the boys, gone were the blouses of the girls. The five well-behaved kids now wore a lighter and more comfortable outfit, composed of a simple, white t-shirt, a pair of blue shorts and white sneakers with blue stripes.
"Hi!" Kuki immediately answered politely. Wallabee groaned and decided to follow a different approach compared to the Asian girl. "Finally! What have you five been doing until now? I thought you finally learned that there's no way you can beat us and gave up!"
"Give up?" the Delightfuls repeated before falling into collective laughter. "Oh, not in the slightest, Wallabee. As you can see, we're here, and we have no intention of going back!"
"Mmh, so what, you need another lesson?" Numbuh One taunted. He knew that teasing their enemy a bit always resulted in getting them distracted on the long run. Well, most of the times anyway.
"You're completely misunderstanding us, Nigel. We've come to show you something, Kids Next Door. We're here to show you that we are… different…"
"Different? What, you've suddenly stopped being evil and want to join us?" Numbuh Five said. She scoffed. "I don't see anything new here apart from your clothes. Looks like Father has had enough of your continuous failures and the way you always go home with your previous suits damaged beyond repair, huh?"
"Good one, Numbuh Five!" Numbuh Two said, grinning at the five perfects. "I think that it's more likely that the Toiletnator manages to capture the Supreme Leader by himself than to see you five willing to ally with the Kids Next Door!"
The Delightful neutral faces slightly shifted to a scowl, but their voice remained unfazed. "We've changed, indeed, but not in the way you're assuming. We assure you, though, that this change is definitely… for the better."
Numbuh One flinched. I have a bad feeling about this.
Nothing however could prepare him for what happened afterwards.
"And now you'll get a first-hand example!" Bruce said, while the other four Delightfuls' mouths remained closed.
The air gained a feel of uneasiness as the operatives stayed immobile, aiming at the five children. Bruce had spoken out of the flawless coordination that the Delightfuls were broadly known for.
…that doesn't mean anything, Numbuh One thought. The Delightfuls can actually act by themselves and we already know that thanks to the operation against the coffee rigs.
But Numbuh One couldn't shake away the feeling that something wasn't right. And the situation, indeed, developed against his hopes. Bruce made a step forward, and the other four children remained immobile.
"What, nothing to say? The cat stole your tongue, Kids Next Door?" Bruce continued. By himself, his resemblance with Numbuh Four was uncanny to say the least.
"…uuh… not, of course not! What you're trying to do, anyway? If ya' think that's going to take us aback, I have bad news for ya'!" Numbuh Four tried to retort. His tone, however, wasn't as determined as usual. Numbuh One checked his other teammates' faces and he saw the same signs of awkwardness on their features. They shared his own worries.
And before he could open his mouth to address the issue, Costance and David moved. The short girl went to Bruce's right side, while the tall boy took his position on his left.
Numbuh One bit his lip.
David crossed his arms while Costance grew a wide, disturbing smile. That didn't leave space for debate: the three Delightfuls who had stepped forward were disconnected by each other, since their postures were completely different.
Behind them, Ashley slowly raised her hands and put them behind her neck, in a way that most people would have deemed informal… very different from the usual behaviour of the Delightfuls. "I disagree, Wallabee," she said, alone, while she walked to get to Costance's side, "I feel like you all are quite stressed by now… am I wrong?"
Lenny moved as well to take his position to David's left. Of the five Delightfuls he was the only one to maintain at least one part of his usual clothing, since he carried his football mask. Even so, he looked as different as the other four, and behind the shadow of his mask the operatives of Sector V knew that he was smirking.
"What's the meaning of this, Delightful Children?" Numbuh One uttered, trying to sound threatening.
"Numbuh Five doesn't see anything strange, Numbuh One. They're just trying to creep us out, but they're still the Delightful Child-…"
"Stop grasping at straws, Abigail. You all know very well what's the meaning of this, Kids Next Door," Bruce interjected.
"It means that today is the day of your downfall," Costance said.
"We don't need Father's fancy weapons, we don't need war machines, we don't even need a complex and well-thought plan. Not anymore…" Lenny affirmed.
"We need no help… and you five will succumb!" Ashley hissed, raising her hand and pointing at them.
"You will surrender, or you will suffer as you discover that you cannot do anything to resist our newfound power!" David said, his voice tone was almost comparable to shouting now.
Then the Delightful Children kept silent. For ten, long seconds, nothing happened. Then, without notice, the five perfects rushed forward, and the KND operatives retaliated by opening fire.
The Delightful Mansion usually consisted of silent, dark hallways during the late evening. This time, however, the scene was different since a storm was raging on the outside. The sound of rain battering on the windows could be heard in almost every part of the building, while lightings illuminated the walls for an instant only to be followed by loud thunders.
Even so, the Delightful Children knew better than to be scared by such weather. The five children were currently walking down a hallway, while Bruce carried a candle to light the road ahead, travelling towards their own bedroom. The thunders continued to cover their coordinated footsteps, but the five didn't mind. They used to be scared by it once, but Father had quickly managed to teach them how to it was childish to be so... by showing them what was really threatening, of course.
In fact, the only worry the Delightful Children currently felt was how the storm was most probably ruining the most detailed bushes of their graceful garden.
The five children smiled together. That was a legitimate worry, but Father had at disposal an army of gardeners among other things. If for some reason there happened to be one leaf out of place the day after, they would see it fixed before they could even realize it.
The Delightfuls always liked to see something orderly, functioning and well-preserved. Unlike the idiotic Kids Next Door, especially the five rascal inhabitants of the giant treehouse. Maybe they should have payed a visit to Father before going to bed, to ask if he had any instructions for them about the next day and if he liked their new idea. The five had already been brainstorming their next plan, and they were eager to tell Father about their wicked plot.
They were one-hundred percent sure that, this time, they would have been victorious.
They made a few turns, not a single error, and in no time they saw the door to Father's study. While approaching, they immediately noticed the fact that it wasn't closed but left ajar.
A visitor at this hour? Father's surely not going to like this… the hive mind of the Delightful Children thought. They were well aware of how it wasn't wise to talk with Father when he was in a bad mood, and for a moment they considered the possibility to postpone the visit to the following day.
That was, until they heard someone speaking from inside Father's office. And it wasn't the voice of Benedict Uno.
"…believe me, Mr. Uno. I am one-hundred percent positive that your children, your delightful children, have nothing to fear but to improve."
"My Delightful Children are already perfect as they are. You'll have to do better to convince me… and my patience is already running thin, Freud!"
"Mr. Uno, your children are a miracle, and we both know it. However, their condition cannot be judged fully perfect… they are delightful indeed, but they do have weaknesses that can be corrected. Let me work with your children, Mr. Uno… and, I give you my word, your Delightful Children will be better than ever!"
The Delightfuls were astonished. It wasn't common for them to hear anyone at all talking about them… even less common if it were adults, since they were so good-behaving no one had ever felt the need to complain about them. Except for Father when he found out they had failed again in taking out the Kids Next Door.
Perhaps that was the reason why they stopped and eavesdropped the first part of the conversation, but that was enough. The five perfects shook their heads and together they decided to move in. It was bad to spy on a conversation, far from what they knew was righteous, and by the way if Father wasn't that happy to talk with this stranger, maybe he needed to be accompanied out of the mansion.
Indeed, when the Delightfuls made their entrance, the office was illuminated by fiery flames emitted by Father himself, who was definitely struggling to keep calm, "Psychologist or not, I do not need your services. This is a waste of time… Leave. Now."
"May we help our guest leave the mansion, Father?" the Delightfuls said, startling the two adults. Their hostile glare didn't leave doubts about their opinion of the psychologist.
Father quickly regained his composure and made an affirmative sign with his hand. "Yeah, right, do whatever you want, just make this fool get out of my sight."
The stranger, however, wasn't apparently troubled by the fierce display of Father's power. The man, who probably was around the same age as Benedict, currently wore a formal attire. Through his glasses his eyes were observing the Delightful Children, and the perfects found his gaze unnerving to say the least.
The psychologist beat them on time. "It's exactly as I thought… my hypothesis is indeed true."
He turned back towards Father and let his hands fall on the villains' desk, obtaining his attention once again (and annoying him even more). "Listen, Mr. Uno. Your children are delightful, and it is not in my plans to prove that they're not. However, I know about the incident that let them become what they are… and I know that this is not exactly what you had planned for in the first place, isn't it?"
Father whirled around on his office chair, the flames dying out. "Mmhh… that may be right, but my Delightful Children still are perfect as they are." The psychologist gave a glance to the Delightful Children again and the perfects were horrified to see him smiling. That was expectable though: it was already a miracle Father hadn't reduced him to a pile of ashes yet.
"Yes, they are… but they can be even better. Mr. Uno, you just have to-…"
"You might have a point, shrink," Father suddenly interrupted, "but that does not mean we'll ask for your help. What's in for us, in any case?"
"Most of what you all can imagine," the psychologist continued, and the Delightfuls had to spend a second pondering before realizing he was talking with them as well. "After the treatment, the Delightful Children will be changed for the better and they will stop altogether to displease you, Mr. Uno."
Father inquisitively narrowed his eyes. "Displease?"
"I'll rephrase. Does the name 'Kids Next Door' ring a bell?"
Father slumped back into the chair. "Yes, it does. But what do the brats have to do with any of this, Freud?"
While talking to him, the psychologist kneeled down to watch the Delightful Children, who unconsciously made a step back. "When I'm done with my work, the power of your children will be levels and levels higher than their current state. They are limited at the moment, but after I'll have helped them overcome their limits, they will become stronger than ever… and unstoppable by anyone."
He stood up again. "Anyone… including the Kids Next Door!"
Father moved his piped to the other side of his face. "I'll admit, now you're talking a language I can understand…"
"That's because the Kids Next Door have been… a thorn in my side as well, lately. The so-called defenders of younghood apparently did not approve of my methods… This is going to be my last job on the field in any case, so why not hitting two birds with a stone?"
He moved his hands sideways, "From this we all have nothing to lose, but everything to gain. I only ask for one chance, Mr. Uno… you'll see yourself if my work is worth or not the valuable time of your children."
Father moved a hand to cover his mouth and chin. He was in deep thought, apparently. The Delightfuls themselves didn't exactly have a clear view of the situation as well… they had failed to understand what the psychologist longed for. They, however, understood that he was an enemy of the Kids Next Door. And he was an adult.
How could anyone of that age and with such an enemy in common be of any hazard for their well-being?
"Humph. So be it," Father finally announced. "But you have just one chance, Edwards. And know that, if I ever see that your so-called method causes my children to be less delightful, even by a single inch… you'll find yourself in an extremely blistering situation."
"You could not have been clearer… Father," Dr. Edwards responded, finally resolving to use the villain's name. He offered his palm, and the two of them shook hands.
The Delightful Children watched the two adults while they did so. They didn't know what the future had in store for them now, but they knew that now there was no going back.
AN: You certainly have noticed that this chapter features two distinct parts. Without spoilering anything, I want to say that these are the beginnings of the two storylines that together form this story. Both will be brought forward in each of the following chapters, and both will reach their respective ends together.