Chapter 1
"Get out," Syed screams; and Christian, his face flushed with anger, turns on his heal and walks back out the door, slamming it shut after him.
###########################
About fifteen minutes later
"Syed, what's wrong?" cries Zainab anxiously, rushing over to him without thinking, as soon as she sees her Son sitting on a one of the benches in the Square, in tears.
"Mum," Syed cries in surprise, when he looks up and sees her. "I'm fine, there's nothing wrong," he tries to assure her, struggling to get the words out, desperately trying to get himself under control.
"Wait, don't rush off," she implores, quickly grabbing his arm as he tries to leave. She sits him back down, and gives him a minute to pull himself together.
"I'm fine honestly," Syed says eventually, the tears in his voice giving lie to the words.
"No, you're not," Zainab snaps as gently as she can.
"Please, mum," he mumbles, "I'll be okay."
"Tell me what happened," she asks, "is it something to do with Christian?"
And suddenly, having his mother looking at him with concern, caring about him just for a moment, is too much for Syed, and the floodgates open. "We had a huge fight," he sobs, full of despair. "I told him to leave, and he just turned around and walked out. I think it's over," he cries, the tears falling faster, his body shaking with the effort to contain his pain. Instinctively, he reaches out to her, and before she realises what he intends to do, he has his arms around her and his head buried in her shoulder. Unable to help herself, Zainab hugs him back.
Once he has stopped crying, he pulls back and looks up at her unsurely. "Sorry," he mumbles awkwardly.
"It's okay," she says gently.
"Are you going to say 'I told you so'?" he asks, his face a picture of vulnerability.
"No," Zainab says with a sad smile, "I've only ever wanted what's best for you."
"As long as it isn't Christian," Syed miserably finishes the sentence for her.
"Well ..," she starts to say, but can't deny the undeniable. "Please come home with me, Syed," she suddenly pleads, her eyes full of hope, "you need your family at a time like this."
Syed doesn't answer, but Christian has seen and heard all he needs to.
###########################
A few minutes later, in the Vic
As soon as he walks in the door, he spots Paul standing at the bar chatting to Roxy. "Hey, glad I caught you," he purrs, sliding up beside him, and dropping an arm casually around his shoulders.
"I thought you weren't interested, that you had a top bloke to go home to?" Paul replies, surprised but happy at the unexpected turn of events.
"Yea, turns out he's not so great after all," replies Christian flippantly, mask firmly in place.
"Well, at least buy me a drink first," Paul protests, as Christian downs in one go the drink he did have, and starts to pull him towards the door.
"No time," Christian says, his voice full of promise, "back to mine."
"Paul is in no frame of mind to resist; he spent the whole of the previous night drooling over one of the hottest guys he's ever come across in all his years of clubbing; and his instincts tells him he has a very small window of opportunity here, and he's not going to do anything to ruin it.
#####################
"Syed, please," Zainab begs, when he remains silent.
"I can't go home with you, mum," Syed reluctantly disappoints her; "no matter what happens, I'm with Christian now."
"But you said, just now, that it was over," Zainab reminds him, confusion colouring her voice.
"I know, but just because we've had a few rows doesn't mean it's really over," he explains.
"Right," she says, still confused.
"I love him so much, mum," he cries, "I can't live without him."
"It's just a phase you're going through," Zainab still stubbornly refuses to accept the truth.
"No, mum, I have never felt like this before in my life. I left you and dad to be with him because it physically hurt me not to be with him," Syed confesses. "Christian and I may be from two very different backgrounds, but 99 per cent of the time it makes no difference; we get on so well and are so happy together."
"And what about the other one per cent?" she asks.
"The other one per cent is what we've been rowing about, but somehow we've got to find a compromise," Syed replies with forced optimism.
"It's a bit like you and me," he adds with a little smile. "My being gay is your one per cent."
"More like 50," Zainab says contemptuously.
"Yea, well, if we could come to a compromise, then maybe we could be friends again," Syed suggests hopefully.
"But, it's against ..." Zainab tries to say.
"We could pretend I'm just a person and you're just a person, and be friends the way you and Denise are, and ignore the bits about each other that we don't like," Syed offers tentatively.
"What don't you like about me?" she snaps, straightening up defensively.
"I love every single thing about you, I think you're perfect in every way, apart from the fact that you're homophobic," he replies.
"Oh," murmurs Zainab, "well I've nothing against them really, you know, as long as they keep to themselves," she tries to defend herself. "I actually liked him before …" she admits.
"And remember how much you liked me before …," he reminds her; "but I can't change the way I am, you know how hard I've tried. Ignoring me, punishing me like this isn't going to make me straight, I've no choice in the matter."
"If you were away from him, if we moved away from here," Zainab pleads.
"No, mum," Syed says firmly, "it would make no difference. Even if I hadn't met Christian, I know now that I couldn't live with a woman. Those four months with Amira were a nightmare for me, and probably for her; I wouldn't do that to another woman. And, anyway, if I didn't have Christian in my life, I know I would day-by-day, slowly lose the will to live."
"But how can you be so sure," Zainab hangs on to her argument determinedly.
"Because I've been there," he says sadly, "when I gave him up to be with Amira."
"But," Zainab begins, trying to think of another argument.
Listen, I need to be heading back to the flat, now," Syed interrupts regretfully, "I need to be there when Christian gets back; I need to speak to him, to speak calmly to him to try to find a way to sort things out; but if you want to have a think about my suggestion, maybe we could talk later, or tomorrow, or anytime; just a few words for a few minutes the odd time would do, I've missed you so much, mum," he admits huskily, his emotions getting the better of him again. "It hurts me so much every time you and dad walk past me without even acknowledging my existence," he adds, his eyes welling up.
"But you won't come back home with me?" Zainab asks one last time.
"No," Syed says quietly, "I could never leave Christian."
###########################
"Are you sure he won't suddenly turn up? Have you …?" Paul manages breathlessly, before Christian slams him up against the wall just inside the door of the flat, his mouth cutting off whatever he was going to say next.
"Is everything okay?" he asks hesitantly after a few minutes.
"Shut up," Christian mumbles.
Neither of them hears the key turn in the door.
"We'd be more comfortable over there," he suggests, "nodding towards the bed."
"No," growls Christian.
"Christian," Paul says very reluctantly a moment later.
"What? WHAT?" he shouts impatiently, pulling back. "Can't you just shut the f**k up for one …," he starts to add irritably before he realises that Paul is looking over his shoulder. Following his gaze, he finds himself looking into the devastated eyes of his life partner.