The rain fell in a pitter pat fashion, uneven and annoying. "Look Josh, it's not that…"
"Its just that I know you don't really love me. I'm not sure exactly who your guy is but I know it's not me." Josh grabbed his jacket and helmet. "Face it Kate, we aren't as good a fit as we'd both like." He kissed her quickly on the cheek and headed for the door. Opening her front door, Josh turned. "Goodbye Katie." He strode out and closed it behind him.
Kate was stunned into silence. This evening had begun so promisingly, then the fight started. Kate had just gone back to work after weeks of therapy and surgery. Not to mention the death and funeral of Captain Montgomery. In fact there still was no replacement for the 12th's Homicide's Beloved Captain, and rumor had it there was no one wanting to come to the 12th and deal with them.
Staring at the door dumbfoundedly Kate jumped, as there was a knock. Josh? she thought as she moved to the door. Hope sprang eternal as she opened the door. Shock, however, met the man on the other side. "Castle?"
"Good Evening Beckett. I met Josh on the way up." Rick smiled in his charming way. "I was going to just drop off this but he said that you'd either need a shoulder or yell at me." He held up a box of her favorite cookies from her favorite bakery. Rick was amazed; he'd never seen Kate look so vulnerable. Her lower lip is beginning to quiver, he noted unhappily. "Kate" He paused, not quite sure how to phrase this. "Kate, is anything wrong?" He was positive there was but peeling The Beckett Onion was not always his strong suit.
Kate's brain was working even though she couldn't say anything just yet. He brought me Almond Amaretto Cookies, she thought. Only one person knew of this most secret of vices for the tough detective. Kate was positive she wouldn't even threaten Lanie the next time they met.
The tension was becoming uncomfortable for Rick. He continued waiting for Kate to say something. Come on Beckett, say something; he silently prodded. He was beginning to feel like and idiot standing in the doorway. Still he stood and waited.
Something kicked Kate in the butt. "Won't you come in Castle?" She moved out of the way and held the door wide. Not quite ready to talk about what just happened, she took in his attire as he came in. Her sharp eye spotted that he was, as usual, impeccably dressed. The thing that was off was that it was a dress shirt and slacks, but rather a nice silk shirt that matched his eyes and a pair of well-worn jeans. Something primal in her brain liked what she saw.
Rick came in as Kate requested. "I'd love to." He looked around her loft space, admiring it as he always did. It wasn't as collected as her old place was, it was more eclectic and showed more of Kate's personality. In short it was a clearer window into her soul.
As he got clear of the short hallway, he spoke. "I have told you how much I love this place, right? It feels more like the Kate Beckett I've learned…" Rick caught himself before he said aloud what he was thinking. To Love, he completed in his head as he said aloud. "A lot about." Mentally he kicked himself for the pause. Stupid, idiot…
Hearing his slight pause Kate's forehead wrinkled as she closed the door. She knew he hadn't said something but not what. From getting shot at Montgomery's funeral, she had a vague recollection of him kneeling over her saying something, she still didn't know what. "That was odd." She commented as she joined him in her living room.
"What was odd?" He asked, setting the box on the ottoman turned coffee table. He hoped that she hadn't noticed his difficult pause. Who are you kidding of course she did. He didn't quite know what to do now. He hadn't meant to intrude on Kate's evening, not that he was sure he had.
"I just had an odd flashback." Kate said conversationally. "I could almost understand what was said, but not quite." She was a bit confused by what had happened between her and Josh and now castle showed up. Perching on the couch she continued. "I keep hoping I'll wake up and that day would have been just a dream. That he isn't really gone." She cocked her head slightly to look at him. "I miss him, you know."
Rick slid onto the couch, that had been the worst day and yet he knew exactly how she felt. "The entire Precinct misses him, he was, " Rick choked on the past tense still unwilling to have it be real, "A great man. It feels wrong not to be butting heads with him." This he could deal with, the shared grief of this loss.
Sliding over, Kate laid her head on his shoulder. She wanted to ask what he had said and yet was afraid to. Instead she spoke about what had just happened. "Josh broke up with me." She swiped at a tear that began rolling down her face.
Rick was stunned; he thought things had been going well between them. He reached an arm around and pulled her close. "I'm sorry Beckett." He commented quietly even thought a part of his psyche was doing back flips.
In the kitchen a timer went off. Kate sniffled. "I should get that. It was supposed to be a great night," she pulled out of Castle's light yet comforting embrace. "Instead, I'm miserable and alone." She padded into the kitchen, her rare skirt flowing about her knees.
"Hey what am I pate'?" Castle joked. He couldn't help himself, the statement screamed at him. He came off the couch and followed Kate.
She couldn't help but laugh at his bad attempt at humor. "That's bad Castle. Anyway you know what I meant." She busied herself by pulling something out of the oven.
"Do I?" He asked in his annoying way. He leaned against the doorway and watched.
Balancing the baking dish and the oven door Kate scoffed. "Yes, you do. Go ahead and gloat, I know you didn't think he was the right one for me." She swallowed as she put the dish on the stovetop. Closing that oven door, she turned to face him.
Rick had pushed off the doorframe. "Kate, just because I told you what I thought of him. It doesn't mean I'll gloat over him dumping you. I'm not that insensitive." That's when he noticed the Simply Pasta take out. "You're hurt by it, I couldn't hurt you further by being a jerk about it. My mother did teach me something besides how to pick out and pour wine." His manner was teasing, his words ferocious. He'd never hurt her while, No… He'd never hurt her.
Sufficiently chastened, Kate managed a weak smile. We've been through a lot together haven't we?" For her it was an observation, nothing overt meant by it. Yet as it hung between them, the tension rose again. She turned, breaking eye contact. "I sometimes forget you aren't a normal partner."
He chuckled. "I've never been called that before." He snuck further into the small kitchen. In the trash he found a complete meal for two, well the boxes for it anyway. "Normal, what is normal? I sit a construct by everyone to make sure we all conform or is it a way to torture those of us who aren't. Who live by different rules than the rest of society. I've always felt it was the latter." He was sneaking a peek at what the boxes in the trash contained. Carbonerra, Garlic Bread Sticks, and Caesar Salad wow this was supposed to be a great night for her; he thought quickly.
Kate chuckled. "I've always felt normal was something to be obtained myself. That I was almost there, but not quite." She leaned against her counter sighing. "My plans and definition of normal changed rapidly." She knew he would understand why. Casting a practiced eye on him, she pondered aloud. "So why was the great Rick Castle dropping by a box of Almond Amaretto cookies to a lowly New York Detective?"
Rick smiled. "Because a certain Medical Examiner said that if that lowly detective was alone too many nights, she'd have to hurt her." He knew he might be getting Lanie in trouble, but the truth always sat better between them. "The cookies are some of my favorites to go with coffee. I try not to have them at home so I actually get some. Some thing about a teenager and Grand Dame of the stage loving them as well."
Kate laughed, rich and warm like honey. "Keeping cookies from Martha and Alexis. Isn't that living dangerously for you Castle?" She was slightly disappointed that Lanie hadn't spilled her secret. Looking around she sighed. I guess I should clean this up." The thought of eating alone depressed her.
Rick heard the change in her voice and made, by his standards, a bold move. "I have another box for them in the car. I know better." Laying a hand on Kate's arm, he continued. "I know I'm not the date you planned on having, but I would hate for you to have to eat alone tonight." He asked for an invitation instead of telling her he was staying. Truly unusual for him
Kate looked at him, really looked. There was no subterfuge in his manner, no scheme in his eyes. Something in her broke. She smiled shyly and tucked a strand of hair behind her left ear. "You know, I really don't want to be alone tonight. Maybe having a friend for dinner is the answer. I mean after all, those cookies would be the perfect compliment to the Vanilla Ice Cream I already have." She was baiting him. "I wonder if Lanie is free?" she asked innocently.
Rick heard this coming a mile away. "I happen to know, on pain of slow torturous death mind you, that Lanie, Ryan, and Espositio are all busy this evening." He put a hand on his chest. "While I, on the other hand, am free as a bird."
Damn, Kate cursed silently, he didn't go for it. "What about your mother and Alexis? Won't they worry?" She hoped she might have him on this one.
Rick chuckled. "Mother is in Chicago visiting an old acting friend and Alexis is on a sleep over with a friend. So, you see, I too would have been alone." He had leaned in slightly to emphasis his last sentence.
Mentally kicking herself for falling into a well-baited Castle Trap, Kate conceded defeat, though not lightly. "Well, seeing that everyone else is otherwise occupied and my dad is too far away. Would you humble yourself, oh author of great renown, and have dinner with a humble New York Detective?"
"I'll always make time for you, Kate" Rick's voice got low with a faint huskiness to it. He would always make time for her, now and forever.
Kate's eyes softened at his words. She felt the truth behind the simple things he said. "I got a bottle of Cabernet to go with dinner, would you open it?" She gestured back into the living room. "I'll get the salad and be out in a jiffy."
"I'd love to." He restrained himself from kissing Kate on her nose as he left the kitchen. He was even able to open the bottle and pour their glasses without making a mess of this very delicate situation. As he waited for Kate, he remembered what she had said about her flashback. Could she know? He wondered. He'd been honest to the point of pain that afternoon. He couldn't lose her; he loved her. No, she said that she couldn't quite understand what was said and she had blacked out right after… Rick shook his head; thinking like this was going to get him in trouble. Follow her lead Rick, as always, otherwise you'll step in it big time. Deciding his inner voice was right, he held up a glass to her as she came in with their salads.
Kate smiled as she came into the living room. Ok so it wasn't the date she had planned, but castle was a friend and she didn't want to be alone. Her chic wrap dress flowed around her knees as she walked. "Here we are." She looked and noticed that castle had been seemingly lost in his head again. This caused a chuckled. She set their plates down. "What were you thinking about? How Rook would get into Heat's pants this time?" It was a rule, she needled him about the sex scenes and he pestered her in general.
Rick breathed a small sigh of relief. "Caught me." He grinned. "I'm thinking that it might surprise them both." Holding out her glass, he saluted her. "Your powers of deduction always amaze me. Wine?" He hadn't yet sat down, waiting for Kate first.
She took the glass and then a healthy swallow. Her eyes closed as the wine rolled down her throat. Opening them again she sighed. "Oh I needed that." Pulling the back of her skirt straight, she sat down. "Castle, sit."
He chuckled slightly. "Just trying to be a gentleman." He sat and tasted the wine. "Yum, that is good." He picked up the bottle to check the label. 2007 Silver Oak Alexander Valley. "No wonder this is so good. 2007 was an amazing year." He said aloud while putting the bottle back on the table. "Where'd you find this?"
"Around the corner at the local wine shop. 2007 was a great year and I like the label. I may see if I can save it." Kate replied between bites. It helped to NOT think about how hurt she felt, to have no pressure on her to be anything but herself. They had finished a case the day before and she was out of paperwork. She leaned her head against the couch back. "Thank you."
Rick watched as Kate slid into a mental slump. He knew that the case they had just finished had been a doozy; then again they knew that going in. For what? I haven't done anything special. He wondered why as he ate. Clearing his throat, he asked. 'For what?" He hoped it was something easy.
"For just being you, my friend. For not asking me stupid questions about Josh like I know you want to." She picked her head up. "For everything Castle, simply for everything." She sounded tired, bone tired.
Rick leaned over and gave in to temptation. He kissed Kate lightly on her right temple. As he pulled back not knowing what to expect, he spoke quietly. "Anytime Kate. I'll always be here for you, always."