^_______^ kata's
Pokemon Smokemon!
Not too many years ago, the travels of three friends began in a very odd place named after a part of Japan, called Kanto. Their names were Satoshi, Kasumi, and Takeshi.
But what they didn't know, was that they were about to be licensed! Scary!
"What's happening?" Satoshi asked in confusion, seeing a big mass of men in suits bringing big machines, and forcing him and his friends into them.
"AAAAAAAAA!" Kasumi screamed.
"I'm sorry about this…" a man in casual clothes stated with some sadness in his voice.
"You can't possibly be! It doesn't look like you're trying to help!" Takeshi pointed out, madly.
"All I wanted is to find a kid friendly adventure and bring it to kids in my country." Casual Man informed them, looking around at the men in suits, embarrassed. "But then these people forced themselves in and began pressuring me to…to…" he continued, but was not able to.
"Do this?!" Kasumi snapped. Then all the men, and even a few ladies, in suits stopped what they were doing for a bit and took a good look at the three kids they had just made many copies of.
"I'm sorry, we forgot to introduce ourselves." The serious boss man in the suit stated sternly.
"We're from the Freakin' FCC." His little daughter in a suit dress informed them sternly, like her dad.
"Bad Sophie, 'freakin'' is a bad word." Serious Boss scolded. The little girl named Sophie just pouted. "I thought you learned better than that." He continued. "Do you want to grow up letting other peoples' expressions and views of the world possess you like it did just then?" he asked her curiously. Sophie said nothing. "I didn't think you would." He smiled. Sophie just scoffed.
"Should we do our formal introduction Serious Boss?" Younger Suit Man asked curiously, but sternly. Serious Boss nodded. And then some happy sounding music came on, it went to some happy sounding song that would fit very good with the lyrics the FCC was about to sing;
Thank you for welcoming us to your little Asian Town
But we really need to do a few things before we welcome you
Because we don't want our patriotic people to go "Boo!"
We must fix a few things, and make some even new things
So watch out because you might be getting pounded…
(music)
To start lets' start changing everybody's name
The kids back in our country can't hear no foreign names
So let's change this closed eyed kid's name to something like Brock
Because in a way your face looks like a rock…
Do not move, do not scurry, we only do what's best
Just accept your new name and thank your Friendly FCC!
Now lets' move onto our little orange haired girl…
Your name might be Kasumi but you heard what we just said
So your new name is Misty!
You know we can't have little girls in our country asking how to spell
Weird foreign names like yours, because we fear they might end up in hell
Plus your specialty is water so you should not complain
Just think when drops of water hit your face
That your old name was a pain, and taste the better water from us!
And thank your Friendly FCC!
Now its time for our little monsters and their freaky names
Let's change Rodon to Vulpix!
Kyushippo to Ninetales!
Pikachu to…Let's just keep it Pikachu.
Rename~~~~~!
Extract cultural references,
And make them OURS
Because we're in control and our targets
Are in some kind of bowl, that is our control
Stop this!!
Stop what?!
Your changing and your extracting, do you not know how insulting it is?!
We don't mind.
We do.
Now you, Hat boy…
Let's finish this by shutting up you
Since you are the hero of this Eastern attempt at a story
It's only right that we call you Ash
Because of our butt-kicking in Hiroshima
You are what's left of it
Let's give him a last name too!
Okay! How about Dong!
Wrong!
Wong?
No, just shut up!
Sorry.
You people sicken me!
Me too!
Yeah!
How about we call you Ash Ketchum!
Because we want something with ketchup
(and we couldn't think of anything else)
So thank your Pacific, Atlantic, Indian, and Arctic
FRIENDLY FCC! Yeah!
"I was just walking by, and then they for some odd reason want to change my name." Natsume complained.
"Kids from our country shouldn't be exposed to peoples' names from countries that end with –ese or –an." Serious Boss explained sternly.
"Like Japanese, Chinese, Korean…" Sophie listed brattily.
"That's right." Serious Boss smiled happily. Sophie smiled proudly.
"Ugh…" Casual Man sighed.
"My face does NOT look like a rock!" Takeshi snapped madly.
"Learn your place Lee." Young Suit man scolded. Takeshi was offended.
"He's not Lee, he's Brock." Blonde Suit Lady reminded him, whispering.
"Oh yeah." Young Suit man smiled.
"You people are crazy!" Kasumi snapped. "Why would you do a thing like this?!"
"Hey, Ming, would you do my nails?" Blonde Suit Lady asked curiously.
"My name is not Ming!" Kasumi snapped.
"Okay," Serious Boss began calmly, stepping in the middle of the two girls, trying to stop them from having a fight. "Lets' go. We have other people to conform to our ways." He explained.
Then Young Suit spotted another group of kids walking along the path.
"I found some!"
And then the Friendly FCC dashed off into the distance, their dark black suits all looking like one giant suit in a mass. They were off to fight wrongs, demonstrate rights, and rid the world of racism and prejudice.
Actually not. They just added more of all that kind of stuff.
"I feel violated." Kasumi said with hurt in her voice.
"I wasn't even born in WWII!" Satoshi informed the scurrying mass of suit.
"This stinks." Takeshi commented in annoyance.
"I'm sorry about all that." Casual Man told them. "I just wanted to bring kids of my country something different, that they would be able to love, even if it's from another country. I didn't want this." He explained. Then he sighed. "At least I know with things with older people, they can't change and extract things. Not as much as this. And some things they can't even touch." He pointed out.
"Lucky." Satoshi sighed.
"What are they gonna do with our copies?" Takeshi asked curiously.
"They're gonna Americanize your existence. They're gonna act like you are American made and not from Japan. Everything you do now will be closely watched. Actually your clones will be closely watched, and edited for Japanese-ness, cross-dressing, nudity, and anything that they find un-American." Casual Man explained. "But, it's in a way ironic. Because many things in America have those same things that they're looking to edit out. It's like they're saying that only America has the right to those things, and other countries don't. It's odd." He continued.
And then Satoshi noticed something. It was one of those FCC people. He was painting the American flag on the side of a cliff.
"How desperate they are." Casual Man sighed. The FCC man smiled and flew off the side of the cliff with their theme music.
Thank your Pacific, Atlantic, Indian, and Arctic
FRIENDLY FCC!
THE END!