I sat at the stage of the auditorium waiting for the rest of the glee club to arrive to start practicing on Nationals. I was alone, naturally. Everyone seems to be running fashionably late. I sighed, why I must always be on time when everyone isn't.
I figured I'd text Blaine to find out where he is and why he is running late. I stood up and went to the piano where I left my messenger bag. I was busy looking for my phone when I heard the door open. I turned around to see who arrived.
It was Sam, my stomach jumped. Sam and I never really talked that much before he went away, even more so when he came right back. Just few small talks here and there and that's about it. I don't know why we haven't really talked. It seems that Fate has never really wanted us to talk until now.
I don't why I felt nervous all of a sudden, it's just Sam. And we can talk, we are friends after all.
Sam walked towards the stage and greeted me with a half smile. I smiled back. He seated himself on one of the chairs in the front row. I continued to look for my phone in my bag.
"Damn it," I cursed quietly. I must have left it at home. No, I remembered bringing it here. I was just texting this morning. Great. Now it's lost. I frowned.
"What's wrong?" Sam asked noticing my distressed look.
"Uhm, it's nothing," I mumbled.
"Is everything alright?" Sam asked with familiarity, still unconvinced with my answer.
"Yes… No, I think I lost my phone," I sighed, beginning to panic. When Sam didn't answer back, I looked at him. A smile was playing on his lips and was trying to hide it. And his eyes, brilliant green, danced with amusement.
"This is not funny, Sam" I said beginning to raise my voice as panic started to creep into me. I paced back and forth figuring where I could have left it. And at the corner of my eye, I saw Sam smiling nearly laughing. Damn, I must look crazy now too.
"Do you think this funny Sam? Losing my phone amuses you?" I started, panic being replaced by anger.
"Whoa, no, it's not that losing your phone is funny, and it's just that-," Sam tried explaining.
"What, Sam please get straight to the point," I cut him off, my emotion teetering on the edge of hysteria and impatience.
"Okay, your phone is not lost," Sam said with his tone still amused, "It's there," he pointed where I was seated before I went to my messenger bag to supposed get my phone which was actually beside me.
My cheeks flushed a deep crimson, you've got to be kidding me, and this is so embarrassing. Why didn't I notice my phone, it's my freaking phone. Not only that, Sam was there to witness it, making it all the more humiliating. I cringed inwardly.
I looked up at Sam, and saw his green eyes still mischievous with a big smirk on his lips. My heart skipped. "T-Thank you," I stumbled to say, and directly turned around to hide another round of blood rushing to my face.
What was that about, oh dear, what was with my reaction, I know Sam is cute and handsome, but I had a crush on him once upon a time. That was over. But why did my body react so jumpy right now. Damn it, why do we have to be alone.
I pretended I was texting but actually I was calming my nerves. I just didn't know what just happened. I'm afraid to face Sam and all these feelings that are beginning to surface when I look at him. What's wrong with me? I cringe, for real this time when I heard Sam started talking. Now I have to face him, but I'll gladly talk to him with my back turned but for manner's sake I need to face him. Ugh, me and my manners. I rolled my eyes.
"Uhm, hey about not telling you guys I was moving," Sam started. I faced him, his eyes have turned to solid green from those liquid emerald a few moments ago. His eyes filled with gravity, which told me he was serious.
"I'm sorry I didn't tell you, especially you and Quinn," Sam continued. And at the mention of Quinn's name my chest tightened. What for, I didn't know and I just waved it off. But I didn't interrupt I let him continue all the while focusing on his face. His jaw was set and I marveled how angular it is, and I wondered what it was like to trace my fingers- wait, what, stop. What am I thinking? I looked down embarrassed at myself.
"Uhmm, it was much easier when we left when I didn't say anything because if you guys knew it would have been so much harder," he continued, searching my eyes.
I looked up and his gaze bore right through me. His green orbs turned to the color of olive green begging for me to understand, which of course I did.
"Sam, you don't have to explain yourself, I completely understand," I finally said. Relief flooded his face, his pupils turned a shade lighter and his jaw relaxed. "Thanks, Kurt, I could always count on you," he said.
I got down the stage and went over to him, and explained. "Sam," I began looking at him and he looked up and held my gaze. I was stunned for a moment to see his eyes filled so much emotion.
I lost my voice for a moment and got lost in his eyes. And then I tried to remember what I need to say and straightened up and walked away to lean my back to the stage.
"Hey, we don't mind you know, the important thing is you are here now," I said trying to avoid his eyes, instead looking at his nose his perfect straight nose, and how I want to trace my fingers-again with the tracing my fingers along Sam's face. Damn it, what is wrong with me?
I looked down to avoid looking at him altogether, somehow this little heart to heart we are having is bringing out the feelings I had for him a long long time ago. And it would seriously complicate things, I have Blaine, I love Blaine. Not Sam, it was just a crush.
I need to get this over with before my emotions become a heap of tangled mess.
"Do you think we have brought you back if we didn't understand?" I asked Sam making him feel better. At least I hope I am.
"No," Sam mumbled, his gaze still searching mine.
"We are like a family, Sam, you can always count on that," I continued further. "We help each other get through stuff." I gave him a little smile.
I was still avoiding his eyes, if I looked at him in his steely green orbs one more time, I'm done for.
"Kurt," he called out. I forced my eyes to look at him, and his eyes flashed a lot of emotions before he carefully set it to his usual happy liquid emerald with a tinge of olive. I thought I saw regret, sadness, maybe even anger? I didn't know. All I know, Sam has a lot of emotions coursing through his veins right now. And what I needed to do is stop thinking about tracing my fingers all over his face down to his neck to his throat-oh my, what am I thinking. AGAIN! I shuddered.
He still held my gaze and he quickly closed the space between us with his long legged strides. When he was near enough, his eyes flashed regret and sadness before it turned to a mask of serious dark green. His face was inches from my face. He looked right into my eyes, and I into his. At that moment, all I saw was his green orbs locked into mine. The whole world vanished. It was just me and him. I was truly lost in his eyes.
For a moment his gaze lingered on my eyes then on my lips. My heart was racing now. I could feel my pulse with every beat of my heart. Oh dear, what's going to happen. Despite all that I never tore my eyes away from looking at his eyes. There was a sudden shift in his eyes that I couldn't quite name. Am I dreaming all this surely, was Sam Evans about to kiss me? I didn't dare close my eyes, maybe I was misreading things.
We both jumped at the sound of the auditorium door opening, he quickly said, "Kurt, you're the best, I'm thankful for a having a friend like you."
And the mention of friend my chest filled with tightness I couldn't name or understand. I gave him a smile. In which he returned, a smile that melted my heart. And his eyes crinkled and everything fell apart. He pulled me into a hug and when his face touched mine, a sudden electricity jolt zapped at me. I was buried in his neck and I inhaled his scent that scent flutters to my stomach. And then he pulled away, before anyone who came in can see.
He took his seat back where he was before and I just stood there, a million thoughts racing through my head. Somehow when he pulled away, I wanted to close the distance between us. And not to mention how I wanted him to kiss me at that moment. What's wrong with me?