OH DEAR GOD.

OwO

And Otto the kitty ruled the world, as Ducky took down the American government and navy fleet, after airforce 1 crashed into their main carrier.

…

"Oh no."

"Pike, you didn't..."

"Oh no..."

"WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO?"

"It was an accident! No one was supposed to—he just walked right into—oh hell."

H.I.V.E.'s faculty was gathered in the meeting room, most of them unaware of why the meeting was called in the first place.

Pike sat at the head of the meeting table, rubbing his forehead irritably. Beside him sat Ms. Leon, looking about as irked as a cat could look. Colonel Francisco sat at the next table, a visible vein pulsing on his brow.

Being the only three teachers who knew of the situation, their actions only confused the rest of the faculty even more.

"All right. Seeing as we're all here, I may as well start." Said Pike.

"You see... there was an... accident that occurred in the genetics laboratory."

"Again." Leon added. Pike gave her a scathing look before continuing. "It's a matter of great concern, you see, and—"

"To keep it short, the Professor here zapped H.I.V.E.'s own headmaster with another one of his experimental rays." Francisco cut in.

Another glare was given to the Colonel, but Pike looked much too flustered to pull it off properly. He turned to the rest of the staff and sighed.

"What happened to Dr. Nero?" Asked Tennenbaum.

"Don't tell me he got turned into a cat too." Gonzales commented.

"Well, no, not something so convenient." Ms. Leon responded.

There was silence as everyone waited for answers.

"Um... I'll go get him." The Colonel muttered. He left the room for a short while, at which point Pike decided to speak up again.

"All right, we called everyone here because we need to know who has parental experience." He said quickly.

Everyone stared. "Parental?"

"Well... experience... taking care of a baby?" Leon continued.

Chief Lewis, who was dutifully standing at the door, nearly dropped his sleeper. "Don't tell me you—"

"Here he is." Francisco called loudly, entering the room with something wrapped in a large cloth.

Being careful as he made his way to the table, the Colonel lay the little something on the table, revealing a small head of sparse black hair and large eyes looking brightly at the people standing all around, each wanting to get a closer look.

"Oh..."

"Dear..."

"Wow..."

"Ehem." Leon said. "Everyone... here's... Maximilian Nero."

It only ever really sunk in when the baby gurgled happily at the looks of utter shock on every face at the table.

a/n:

OwO

This is what happens when Maqui's bedtime stories go over the edge.

Review please.