So this is the most self indulgent thing I have ever written because life, and as a result, this is probably a bit OOC for Kurapika. So you've been warned.

Also, since this is a modern AU and I figure having your entire clan murdered is not a super realistic modern occurrence in the US, Kurapika's childhood traumas have been changed to something more tangible to me.

The sun had set long before, the many high rise business offices in the area now obscured in darkness, leaving the neon lights of the local bars and late night restaurants shining through. It was a Friday night, full of possibilities. It had been months since he'd been out or made the effort to visit his family a few towns over. The truth was Kurapika just enjoyed spending his free time alone for the most part – sure he got lonely sometimes, but that didn't mean he wanted to go out. The truth was he didn't trust easily - any friendships he had were earned over time. His only real friend had known him since childhood - they'd grown up together, struggled together, gone off to college and lived together there. In a way, Kurapika had always thought they'd keep traveling the world together, but after college Pairo had announced he'd gotten a job in France and that was that. The blonde missed having a friend to just stay in with - sharing a bowl and watching Rick and Morty, or getting dressed up just to have an impromptu runway show, or stuffing your face with freshly baked funfetti cake. That was the problem with being in your later 20s, all the things you took for granted in the college setting – like being surrounded by roommates and thousands of other people your age - suddenly disappeared, and you were left living alone with no more built in friends. Finding a new tribe to call your own after that was so much more difficult than he'd imagined, so he'd simply given up and accepted his solitude. He had a lot of coworkers that were his age, and he'd enjoyed his time out with them, but he hadn't had that connection with anyone. Hadn't experienced the moment where you both realize that you have the same really obscure interests that makes you scream "DID WE JUST BECOME BEST FRIENDS!?" He had seen a glimmer of it once though, a few months before at a happy hour...

Kurapika was a few ciders in when a colleague had introduced a friend who worked for a different branch of the company. Maybe it was his lowered inhibitions, maybe he was just feeling sassy, but instead of greeting him like a normal person, he'd looked him straight in the eyes and half screamed "He doesn't even go here!" It was the type of thing his friend group would have laughed at, probably even joined in with their own one liners, but none of his coworkers seemed to understand (that's what you get for being a gay man in a straight man's industry). He was just about to turn and walk away with his tail between his legs when the man laughed, a glorious full deep sound that resonated within his chest. When the noise finally died down, he looked him dead in the eye and said "You go Glen Coco," and fucking winked at him. And that's how the blonde knew that Leorio from accounting was his kind of people. Unfortunately, the night had turned out that they hadn't talked much after that moment, and Kurapika went back to his familiar crowd. Maybe another time, he'd thought, and left it at that.

At least until the next Monday. It was the shattering glass effect - Kurapika hadn't really noticed Leorio until that night, but then the following week he suddenly became hyper aware of Leorio's presence. In fact, he found himself running into him everywhere - in the kitchen, when he went to scavenge for leftover treats from the business meetings earlier in the day only to find Leorio had taken the last cinnamon roll, that prick - in the bathroom, when he was really just sitting in the stall on his phone because sometimes you need a break from paper work, only to realize that Leorio was next to him doing the same thing because his shoes were so obvious - even outside, when he had allowed himself a half cigarette to take off the edge that his performance review had left him with, only to find that Leorio was allowing himself a full one just around the corner. And this was how it went for the next few months - Kurapika, continually running into Leorio, as if fate was saying "hey dude, get your shit together and make this guy your friend!", only for Kurapika to tell fate to fuck off and slink back to his desk without having said more than a few words to the taller man.

That didn't mean he didn't think about Leorio, he certainly paid attention to his patterns - he always arrived at 9 and left by 5:30, he drank coffee black, etc - and he allowed himself to listen in on any office gossip that involved the brunette. The problem was that he didn't know Leorio, not really, but he was still inexplicably drawn to him. And when that draw forced him to notice other attributes, like how he always had a sexy layer of stubble on his face the days he seemed tired, or how his pants were perfectly fitted to accentuate his firm butt, or how his eyes twinkled when he found something genuinely funny, he realized he had to put a stop to things. So, logically, he decided to create a list of reasons why he and Leorio would never work out romantically. It is, in fact, a literal list that Kurapika keeps written down and stuffed in desk drawer next to his other personal items because every once in a while his daydreams get a bit too vivid and he has to add another item to the list to keep himself grounded. The list, as it currently stands, is thus:

A. Leorio is loud. The man was clearly never told to use an inside voice as a child, because his normal volume level is what most civilized people would consider yelling, and don't even get Kurapika started on what happens when Leorio's excited, as if the over stimulation forces the words through a funnel in his throat and out Ten. Fucking. Times. Louder. than they would be otherwise.

B. Leorio doesn't get fashion. Sure, he always wears a suit and that is totally appropriate for his position, but he wears the same damn blue suit every day. He's like a cartoon character who was given just the one outfit because, fuck it, drawings different clothes on people is too much work, let's just have them always wear the same damn thing. Kurapika once asked him if he owned multiple of the same as a joke, only to have Leorio respond 100% seriously that yes, he has three identical blue suits that he cycles through because "they're the perfect fit, why fix what isn't broken?"

C. Leorio doesn't understand subtly or subtext. Every morning, he compliments the blonde girl from the 10th floor. Every morning, he comes in to his office with a stupid grin and tell his cubicle mates that she is definitely into him. Every morning, when he walks away to get his first cup of coffee, they laugh about how dense he is because any normal person could see that the blonde girl was 100% not interested in Leorio. In fact, most people realized pretty quickly she wasn't even interested in men, but leave it to Leorio to be convinced a lesbian was in love with him.

D. Leorio is good. Sickeningly so. Wholesome, kind hearted, dependable, hardworking - he is the poster child for good. And Kurapika, well Kurapika has been through some shit. He's done and seen things that most people his age have only experienced vicariously through tv and movies. If you took the movie "Thirteen" and replaced Evan Rachel Wood with Kurapika, you'd have a pretty good idea of what being thirteen really was like for him, and if you extrapolated that another decade or so, you'd have a pretty good idea where Kurapika was now, so yeah, he was definitely not the poster child for good. As cliche as it sounds, people like Leorio just didn't understand people like Kurapika, it's hard to empathize with someone so damaged when the worst thing that ever happened to you was losing the 4th grade spelling bee.

E. Leorio is straight. This is probably the most important reason. It would be good for Kurapika, having a guy friend he knew was completely off limits. It was so much easier when he knew there was no chance of getting attached. Of course it doesn't stop the fantasies, but they'll never come true so what's the harm?

The last item on the list hadn't been confirmed directly, but since he barely spoke to the man, asking him if he was straight seemed unnecessary. It was one Kurapika had added just a few days before when Leorio had come into the office in dark jeans and a casual button up for the first time since Kurapika had started paying attention to him. And he certainly would have notice this particular outfit before because holy shit, Leorio was attractive. In his mind, this item was the proverbial nail in the coffin, and it was enough to keep the thoughts (mostly) at bay. Of course this was just a list of why he couldn't be interested in Leorio romantically - the truth was he still saw a great potential in him to be a friend, and he promised himself he'd pursue it when the opportunity arose.

So now on this Friday night, it seemed that the time for him to actually make an effort to get to know Leorio - Leorio in real life mind you, not the characterization he'd created of him in his mind - might have finally come. He hadn't expected anyone else to still be at the office - working late was something he actually enjoyed, but most others left by six at the latest - so the you couldn't blame him for the quiet gasp that escaped his lips or the way his right hand instinctively grabbed at his heart when he turned the corner towards the elevators and nearly ran face first into someone's chest. The look of horror would have dissipated were it anyone else, but of course it was Leorio, and of course he was grinning down at the blond like the damn attractive idiot he was.

"Oh, hey Kurapika, sorry about that! That corner is going to get someone killed one of these days. I almost poured hot coffee on Illumi the other day when I took it too quickly. If looks could kill..." the taller man gave him one of his trademark cheesy grins, one hand was nervously rubbing at the back of his neck, the other fidgeting at his side.

Kurapika did his best to shake himself out of shock and respond. "Uh, yeah. No worries, I'm easily startled, so not your fault." Great going Kurapika, way to tell him your an anxious mess 90% of the time. Just swell.

They'd both stepped back enough to have a proper conversation, Leorio leaning gently against the wall, blocking the blonde's path. "Oh, well I'm sorry anyway! What are you still doing here at 7:30 on a Friday though?"

The shorter man sighed, guess this just turned into a hallway conversation...

"Well Killua and I had a big date planned, but I had to get that report out since Mr. Morrow wants to review it this weekend, so..." he lifted his hands to either side and shrugged his shoulders, as if to say 'what can you do?'

Leorio's grin faltered, a much smaller one left in its place. "Oh, uh Killua is it? That's your..."

Oh, right. Leorio didn't know anything about him, despite the borderline creepy number of things he knew about him.

"Cat. Killua is my cat Leorio. It was a joke." Kurapika subconsciously knew Leorio wouldn't get the reference, but sometimes his cynicism just couldn't be contained.

"Oh, uh, hahahha, ha, ha. Right. Well I don't have any big plans either, Friday nights usually just mean Trader Joe's stir fry and binge watching netflix for me."

Well that sounded painfully similar to Kurapika's intended plans. He decided to make that fact known, just to gauge the taller man's reaction. "Interesting... I'm picking up thai food and taking it back and finishing up Stranger Things."

And there it was, that cheesy smile back on his face. There was a distinct glimmer in his eyes now too that hadn't been there before. Hook.

"No way! I just started it last week - I know, I am really behind - but I just didn't have time until now, so I'm only on episode 4."

Kurapika was on the last episode, but the prospect of having a reason to hang out was too good to pass up. "I'm actually on episode 3. It's nice to know I have someone to talk about it with that hasn't finished it yet."

"Yeah definitely, maybe we could watch it together some time!"

Line. Time for some of that Kurta family charm to seal the deal. Smile, look down coyly, now look up at him through your eyelashes and smirk.

"Sure. You could bail on your awesome plans and join me tonight? I can get take out for two." Kurapika cursed himself - This is why the list exists! That is not how you ask someone to hang out, that is how you ask someone to bed!

Of course he didn't really expect Leorio to accept, but he did expect him to at least look pleased at the invitation - Leorio was a pretty cocky guy, after all. Instead his eyes grew wide and he started to fidget again, with an expression that looked almost shy. This was definitely not the reaction he'd expected.

"Oh um well, I-I, you see -"

Shit. Abort! Hook, Line and Abort! Story of Kurapika's fucking life.

"Never mind, that was really last minute, forgive me. Another time then. Goodnight Leorio." The blonde turned and moved to walk around the man as best he could while silently cursing himself for fucking up something as easy as asking someone if they wanted to hang out. Well done Captain Awkward. In his defense, Leorio was just so damn adorable, it did things to Kurapika's brain -things that made him turn a simple invitation to hang into a lust filled offer to netflix and chill.

"Wait, uh Kurapika, could you maybe give me your number? You know, so we could make plans or something for another time?" Leorio had caught up to him, face flushed and frantic.

Maybe he hadn't royally fucked up after all.

"Oh, well, I rarely answer my phone, but I guess it can't hurt?" Why not, at least this way Leorio could contact him if he changed his mind. The ball was out of Kurapika's court, at least. The exchange was brief, and within moments he was on his way out the door, walking to the train with pad thai on the mind.

TBC, 1/2. The main purpose of this was so that I could get back into writing for this Fandom. I had intended a oneshot, but I am apparently incapable of that so twoshot it is.