THE RAPUNZEL PLAY THAT WENT TOTALLY WRONG
CHARACTERS: Rachel, David, Tricia, Random Guy, Director.
ALL: This is THE RAPUNZEL PLAY.
David: I am David; I will be playing as the NARRATOR & the PRINCE.
Rachel: I am Rachel, and I will be playing as the EMPRESS.
Tricia: I am Tricia, and I will be playing as the UGLY, MEAN WITCH.
Rachel: And the director is sitting in the audience, just to make sure nothing goes haywire.
Director: (Stands up & waves arms, then faces audience) these guys have practiced a lot, so be on your best behavior. We don't want anyone to mess up their lines, or, you know. It'll be THE RAPUNZEL PLAY THAT WENT TOTALLY WRONG. ACTION! PLACES EVERYBODY!
David: Wait!
Director: What?
David: Sally isn't here; she is the most important part. She's Rapunzel.
Director: Oh no, my play will be ruined. Unless, (stands up) would any of you kids in the audience like to-
Random Guy: (Interrupts & Jumps up & down) Oh me! (Repeats 4 times)
Director: Okay, you can be Ra-
Random Guy: (Interrupts again) Thank you! (Repeats 2 times)
Director: Put on the wig, and then an extra copy of the script is under the chair over there.
Random Guy: (Runs on stage, puts on wig, then grabs script)
Director: Action! For real this time!
David: Once upon a time, there was a girl named Rapunzel. She had really long hair.
Random Guy: (Walks around stage) um... what's my line?
Director: I wish my hair wasn't so long!
Random Guy: THANKS!
Director: Oh no.
David: So she decided to go to see the witch. She told the witch everything!
Random Guy: (To Witch) Everything!
David: No, no, no, you're not literally supposed to say "everything". Read the script.
Random Guy: The script is blank. All it is, is 2 sheets of blank paper stapled together.
David: Well, just… (Thinks for a second)…just play along. K?
Random Guy: K isn't a word, it's a letter.
David: Just shut up! Director, hand her-I mean him; hand him a script.
Director: Here. Don't lose it. K?
Random Guy: But K isn't a word, it's a letter.
Director: You're making my play horrible. It's already a disaster.
Random Guy: My mommy said that nobody is perfect.
Director: (Face turns red)
Random Guy: I'll shut up.
David: Where was I? Oh yes, yes. Well, the witch tried to make Rapunzel's hair shorter. She tried to cut it, but her hair was too thick.
Tricia: Oh drats, cutting hair always makes it shorter. Oh, now I have an idea.
David: The witch was thinking about locking Rapunzel in a tall, tall tower.
Tricia: (Picks up Rapunzel & brings her/him to a chair) You're so heavy!
Random Guy: (Stands on chair)
Tricia: (Leaves)
Random Guy: Oh, I wish a prince would come save me. (Sings off-key) Oh prince, can you hear me-e! Come let me out of the tow-er.
David: A handsome prince heard her.
Oh, I hear a beautiful voice.
Random Guy: Thanks. It works up a lotta sweat.
David: You're…welcome?
Random Guy: Save me! I'm still stuck in the tower, you know!
David: I'll save you Rapunzel!
Random Guy: Um…my name is Tim…I mean Jim…Jim-Timothy…? What's my name again.
David: Ugh!
Random Guy: I know! I'll call Mommy! (Dials random # on the phone) It's ringing!
Hi Mom!
Nothing…
Director: Hang up the phone!
Random Guy: No…I'm just…just…singing a song with some friends!
It's called…Hang Up Da Phone!
Jeez, Mom!
K. Love you. Bye!
Sorry, I typed in the wrong #!
David: I thought you said "K" isn't a word…
Random Guy: So…?
David: You just said "K"!
Random Guy: No…I just said so!
Director: Okay, we are CANCELING THE SHOW!
Rachel: But I didn't even get to say anything.
Director: Bye!
Random Guy: In the next play, can I be the fairy princess?