CONTENT WARNINGS: none.

DISCLAIMER: This story is written entirely for entertainment and is not intended as an infringement against the copy written material that belongs solely to Showtime, MGM/UA, Gekko Films, et al. I'm only playing with their characters and will return them as soon as the story is finished. The following story is the property of the author and is not to be copied, or published without the express, written consent of the author.

AUTHOR'S NOTES: These are just some thoughts that came to mind after seeing The Learning Curve. From Sam's POV. Let me know what you think. Written in may 2001.

SEASON: 3. Tag to The Learning Curve.

I was working in the lab, studying the fifteen sheets of paper; the cross sections of the naquada reactor Merrin had drawn. Studying my own prototype of the reactor, the one I've managed to build based on her explanations and the drawings.

Stunning.

I can't believe an eleven-year-old girl who had never drawn anything in her life could come up with this.

Amazing.

I must admit I was a little jealous at Merrin at first. I mean; I know there are a lot of people who think I'm way too smart, knowing too much about things they won't ever understand. I have studied hard for it, though. Left out a lot of 'fun', as the Colonel pointed out, or I wouldn't be what I am today.

Merrin, on the other hand, was only eleven and way smarter than I'll ever be. It seems that it didn't cause her much trouble to gain all that knowledge, either.

It most certainly gave me a whole new take on the nanocytes we'd encountered on Argos. There we'd seen the nanocytes being used on a whole civilization, in order to study them. The Orban way of using them to learn was incredibly smart, fascinating and effective.

That is, if you didn't take into account the side effects it had on the Uroan, the chosen children, because they had no life left after the ceremony of the Averium; none to speak of that is.

You see, during the Averium, the Uroan have, as the Colonel described it, their brains sucked out.

Merrin assured me that it was an honor to be chosen as an Uroan. It was her obligation to help her people gather the knowledge she could provide them with. She never doubted her duty.

I wasn't sure I was still jealous at her, knowing all that.

I wanted her to stay on Earth. Was it a selfish wish? Wanting to keep her close to me, to learn from her? Or was it for her, to prevent her to become a child with the mind of an infant?

I don't know.

I guess I couldn't really decide between being selfish and protecting her. It was much easier to accept that there was no way we could keep her on Earth. We had no right, had we? We had no right to steal eleven years of gathered knowledge from the Orbanians. It would cost them another twelve years to replace what we would take from them.

Besides, Merrin didn't want to stay, right?

So Merrin went back.

I should have been thrilled, with the naquada reactor she'd shown me, for the knowledge she'd provided me with. I should have been busy with it, working on it…

I kept staring at it instead.

The excitement I'd felt when all that technology was presented to me was replaced by a lack of interest. I'd been working on it for hours with Merrin's help and had managed to build a working prototype.

I should be proud, but I wasn't.

This morning I'd seen what was happening back on Orbania. Those children, the way they were acting… playing… learning. It was something I hadn't imagined possible. Although I knew the Colonel had taken Merrin away from the base, I have a pretty fair idea where he'd taken her now. Merrin didn't recognize him anymore. The Colonel sat down with her, talking to her and drawing with her on that wall…

It suddenly hit me.

I slowly slid down to the floor, cradling my head in my hands, elbows leaning on bent knees and cried. Tears were dripping from my cheeks onto my pants and I just let them go. Mixed emotions, that's what it was. I was happy and sad, shocked and relieved. I couldn't really tell.

The man who thinks he's not nearly as smart as us scientists turned out to be the master of teachers. And Holy Hannah did he teach us a great lesson today.

The very basics of humanity.

Isn't it ironic? Every time I'm teaching others, sharing my knowledge, I get rewarded. He taught us something so incredibly important only to get punished for it. Better yet, he knew it and it still didn't stop him from doing what he needed to do.

I sat there for a long time, allowing the tears to flow, sobbing like a child. Finally wiping my eyes clear, I realized somebody had stepped into the lab.

It was him.

"Are you all right?" he asked, eyeing me with concern.

I smiled, quickly rising to my feet. "Yes, Sir." I hoped that sounded convincing.

"You sure?"

He stood there, leaning nonchalantly with one shoulder against the wall, a hand shoved deep into his pocket.

"Absolutely, Sir," I nodded, brushing my hair back with one hand.

I looked at him questioningly. He stood there, not moving, a little lost it seemed.

"Sir?" I asked. "Was there something you needed me for?"

He shook his head. "Uh… No."

Then he looked over his shoulder, across the hallway, before his eyes found mine again, a little embarrassed now. Pulling one of his famous helpless faces.

"I… " He hesitated. "I… need to …"

I waited patiently, raising my brows as I wondered what it was.

"I need to check this room…" he said, staring at the wall, "…amongst others. You know, fill in some reports..."

That's when I noticed the huge pile of paperwork he was carrying under his other arm.

Ah. Hammond's reprimand. At least it wasn't a court martial then. I smiled, relieved.

"Okay… Let me help you with that," I offered.

"No, you don't have to," he objected.

I straightened my back. "I know. But it'll be faster when we do this together. I check, you fill it in," I replied. I hesitated and then continued firmly. "Besides, I want to do this."

His eyes met mine for a brief moment.

"It will be an honor, Sir."

THE END