A Bump in the Road
Chapter 1
(15 months)
'Listen...' Sara whispered as Neal frowned and momentarily pulled his mouth away from the crook of her neck.
He hovered above her, listening intently. 'What?' he whispered back, eyes narrowing.
'Silence!' Sara responded with a wide grin as she eagerly pulled him back in.
With a fifteen month old toddler in the house, those quiet, intimate moments were few and far between and Neal wasn't about to waste a minute of their precious alone time. He sniggered and brought his lips back down to his wife's neck.
'Let's enjoy it while we can' he murmured, his mind - or rather his mouth - returning to its original destination, that delicious sweet spot right behind her ear.
Thanks to the kindness and generosity of Peter and Elizabeth Burke, the young parents were treated to one night a month of precious alone time and no matter how their date night started - whether it was dinner out, going to a show or just catching a movie on the couch in their family room - it always ended with their grateful limbs blissfully intertwined between the sheets.
Of course, if you asked the Burkes, their 'generosity' was anything but; they loved having their goddaughter all to themselves for the evening without having to defer to her parents' all too cumbersome and numerous rules. Peter, especially, took advantage of every opportunity to thoroughly spoil Hope, the apple of his eye. Without Neal and Sara's 'meddling', he could let her stay up as late as she wanted, feed her whatever junk food she craved and watch with delight as she inevitably fell asleep, curled up against a content Satchmo as the two best friends eventually dropped from exhaustion. After all, what happened at Casa Burke stayed at Casa Burke and even at the tender age of fifteen months, the toddler seemed to instinctively know that certain things were sacred and needed to stay between herself and her doting godparents and were not meant to be shared with her mom and dad.
On this particular occasion, the romantic interlude had been extended from a one-nighter to the whole weekend, right up until Sunday at dinnertime - after all, this month marked the Caffreys' first wedding anniversary and Peter and El were hoping the newlyweds would take the opportunity to celebrate in style. Neal and Sara couldn't have been happier for the additional time alone, considering their secret mission and the fact that the little plastic stick Sara had peed on that morning had confirmed what her bloated tummy and tender breasts had already hinted at: she was ovulating. Neal had been bursting at the seams all week, holding back so he could contribute the highest quality 'swimmers' to their joint project: Ellis-Caffrey baby number two.
Neal's hand snaked down Sara's belly, brushing softly past her sensitive breasts, reaching down between her long legs and finding that warm, welcoming wetness, another sure sign that their timing was right on; he smiled naughtily as he heard her coo in his ear, her teeth playfully nibbling on his earlobe.
'Nice' he murmured as Sara moaned softly.
He pulled away momentarily to gaze into her eyes, enjoying the unmistakeable look of arousal he found there.
'You're so beautiful' he whispered longingly, eyes clear and bright as his hand returned to gently cup her face. 'Let's make a baby.'
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Back in Brooklyn, Hope Ellis-Caffrey had finally run out of steam. After spending a good part of the afternoon with her uncle Peter at the park, she'd run around the Burkes' backyard relentlessly chasing after Satchmo until he'd finally given in and fallen at her feet, his breathing labored as the toddler giggled irrepressibly and patted his soft furry head. For dinner, she'd had two heaping helpings of macaroni and cheese and a huge bowl of mint chocolate ice cream before falling into some sort of diabetic coma on the Burkes' living room couch, curled up snuggly between her godparents with loyal Satchmo at their feet.
'She sure is something else, isn't she?' Peter asked rhetorically as he ran his hand through her dark, soft curls, a wide grin on his lips.
El glanced down at the child, her eyes returning to Peter's loving gaze. She grew quiet for a moment, watching as Peter's face lit up at the sight of their beautiful goddaughter, sound asleep between them.
'Do you ever wish things had turned out differently for us?' she finally asked, the question burning on her lips.
They hardly ever talked about it anymore but Hope's arrival in their lives had ignited a fresh new wave of doubts, causing Elizabeth to wonder how their lives might have been different if only...
'Honey, it is what it is...' he answered in his no nonsense voice, moving his hand to gently caress her shoulder.
'Maybe we should have... you know, tried harder' she said, her voice trailing.
'You wish we'd tried harder?' Peter asked, sensing his wife's sadness. He watched as she shrugged, resigned yet...
'Oh, honey...' he began, rubbing her back and watching as a few tears welled up in her eyes. 'I know this is hard on you... there's no explanation for why things happen the way they do... why Sara got pregnant without even trying and you and I...'
'Don't get me wrong, I love her to death' El said, glancing down fondly at the sleeping toddler and running her hand gently down her chubby cheek 'and I love that Neal and Sara asked us to be her godparents. It's just that every once in a while, I still wonder what it would have been like for us...'
Peter gently lifted Hope onto his lap, her tiny body melting seamlessly into his and he moved in closer to El, pulling her tightly up against him.
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Neal let out a guttural groan, eyes tightly shut as his body shuddered, Sara's long, lean legs firmly wrapped around his thrusting hips, keeping time with him in perfect rhythm. She gazed up at his beautiful face, so guileless, his hair mussed and drooping in his eyes, obviously lost in the moment and she pulled him in, arms around his arching back as he moaned through the last of his orgasm. He melted into her embrace, his arms reaching around her shoulders to hold her closer, his face cradled in the delicate crook of her neck as he panted, his hips still rocking gently back and forth, unwilling or unable to stop.
'Sara...' he murmured breathlessly as she ran her hands lovingly through his disheveled hair and brought her lips to his forehead, waiting for him to return to himself. She could feel the tension slowly leave his body and she listened as his breathing slowly began to even out. He held on tight, unwilling to pull out just yet; he'd been searching the internet for helpful tips on 'getting your wife pregnant' - some fact, some likely fiction - including the benefits of not pulling out too soon following intercourse. After a few moments, he felt himself slowly begin to slip out despite himself and he rolled off his wife, letting himself fall back, exhausted, on the pillow beside her.
'You alright?' he asked after a moment, placing a soft kiss on her forehead, his arms enveloping her.
'Yeah, you?' answered Sara dreamily, still breathless from their vigorous workout.
They slowly regained normal breathing, gazing lovingly at each other with a matching set of goofy grins; sex had always been exciting and fulfilling, the furthest thing from routine and after a year of marriage, that had thankfully not changed - nor could they imagine a time when it ever would.
Neal's sentence had officially ended eight months earlier and he had been off-anklet ever since, continuing to work with Peter on cases from time to time but mainly staying home to care for Hope while adding to his now extensive collection of original artwork. Now that he and Sara had moved to the suburbs, there was a lot more to do around the house, including tending to the garden, an interest Neal had no idea he even had before moving to White Plains. He also loved indulging his passion for cooking in their large, brightly lit new kitchen, watching with amusement as their daughter played nearby in the family room.
'So...' Neal said, still catching his breath 'Do you think that'll get the job done?'
'I don't know but that was...amazing' Sara responded, a lilt in her voice. 'The timing is perfect; fingers crossed' she added with a satisfied smile.
She turned to face him in the bed and Neal instinctively placed a gentle hand on her shoulder to push her onto her back. 'Don't move' he said turning towards her. 'Twenty minutes...' he added earnestly as he placed a kiss on her nose.
Sara laughed out loud, pushing him away playfully. 'Neal, that's just an old wives' tale.'
'It is not!' he responded, sounding like an argumentative three-year-old, all the while trying to appear authoritative. 'I'll have you know I got that advice off a very reputable website.'
'Oh, yeah? Which one?' Sara responded without missing a beat. 'Submissive wife dot com?'
'Sara!' he said, tickling her gently as she giggled.
Her mind wandered to their daughter and she couldn't help but smile. 'Did I tell you what Hope said when I told her she'd be sleeping over at Peter and Elizabeth's tonight?'
'What?' asked Neal, anticipating another gem – his daughter was brilliant.
'She said 'Mama, play Sach.'
'She is so smart' said Neal, smiling to himself as if he alone was responsible for her superior language skills.
'Listen...' he added, his voice suddenly serious as he thought ahead to the next few days. 'We're going to need Fran to babysit for us this week, Peter called me in on a case.'
'Oh, yeah? What kind of case?' Sara asked, her curiosity piqued.
'Some pharmaceutical company fraud case, I don't know the details; Peter's going to brief the team on Monday' Neal answered, his voice rough.
'Well, I've got an appointment with Dr. Cooper on Monday at four. Is that going to be a problem?' asked Sara, remembering her long-ago booked appointment with her OB-GYN, something she had tried, without success, to forget.
'No, I can pick up Hope after work. What's the appointment for?' Neal asked, suddenly concerned.
'Oh, nothing important – I'm just overdue for my PAP smear and while I'm there, I thought I'd see if she has any advice on getting pregnant' said Sara, hoping that, after this weekend, no additional words of wisdom would be required.
Neal turned to face her in the bed, eyebrows raised, eyes sparkling with mischief.
'Why, I gave it all I had, ma'am' he said with an exaggerated Texan twang. 'But if you'll...let me tuck my boots under your bed and tie my horse up to your bedpost, I can give it another go in a little while' he added, playfully nuzzling Sara's neck.
Sara eyes grew in a show of exaggerated appreciation and she threw her head back as she dissolved in a fit of giggles 'Why, cowboy' she said in her best southern drawl 'I didn't think you had it in you!'
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Sleeping late was a very rare occurrence in the Caffrey household and when Sara woke without the benefit of Hope calling out for her, she turned languidly, reaching out for Neal only to find his side of the bed cold and empty. She had barely gotten her bearings when she spotted her husband standing in the doorway to their bedroom carrying a breakfast tray and a huge smile.
He made his way to sit by her on the bed, placing the tray between them and reaching over to kiss her in greeting. 'Good morning Mrs. Caffrey!'
'Why, good morning, cowboy!' she answered with a grin.
'Thought you could use some coffee to get started' he said, pouring her a cup.
Her eyes were immediately drawn to the wrapped gift that was tucked in right behind the single red rose on the breakfast tray and she glanced up at Neal, silently asking for permission to reach for it.
He gave her the old eye raise and shoulder shrug combo telling her to go ahead and Sara excitedly reached over and picked up the package as Neal looked on smugly. He was always great at picking gifts for her; he seemed to know instinctively how to put a smile on her face and he loved to watch as she discovered what surprise he had in store for her.
She let out a gasp as she took in the Caffrey original hidden under the wrapping. 'Neal! I absolutely love it!' she exclaimed.
'See...there's a different painting for each month' he explained as he settled in on the bed next to her, turning the pages of the monthly calendar he'd worked meticulously to prepare over the last few weeks. Each month had a hand painted version of a photograph they'd taken of Hope over the past year which Neal had reproduced in watercolor onto thick stock vintage paper, each page its own unique work of art.
The last page of the calendar was a portrait of the two of them inspired from a photograph taken on their wedding day. Underneath their likeness, Neal had inscribed: For better or for worse. Thank you for saving the best of yourself for me, Repo. All my love, Neal.
'It's incredible!' Sara said in admiration as she lovingly ran her hand over each page.
'Well, the first wedding anniversary is traditionally paper, so...' Neal said by way of explanation, suddenly sounding uncharacteristically modest.
'Thank you honey, it's just beautiful' Sara repeated as she hugged him tightly.
'Happy anniversary, baby' he added quietly as Sara's eyes returned to the treasure in her hands.
'Happy anniversary, Caffrey!' Sara said, echoing his thoughts.
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On Monday morning, Neal strutted into the White Collar offices as if he'd never left - with his usual swagger and the all too typical reaction from the working minions. To his utter delight, heads turned and eyes widened as he made his way through the bullpen towards Peter's office. His appearances were less frequent these days and mostly consisted of social calls to Peter but regardless of the purpose of his visits, he was always greeted enthusiastically by his ex co-workers. Even on anklet, Neal had always been a respected member of the team, now that he was a 'fine upstanding citizen', even more so.
Diana was the first to greet him. 'Caffrey!' she called out from her desk 'I heard a rumor you were joining us on this one.'
'I heard the same rumor' Neal responded, flashing one of his enigmatic smiles. He walked over to her, giving her quick hug 'Peter tells me things are really heating up for you and Christie.'
She raised her eyes at Neal's comment. 'Peter might look like the strong silent type but he's the most gossipy person in this office' she responded with a laugh. 'Yes, it's true. Christie and I are planning a commitment ceremony and yes, it's true, we've begun to look into artificial insemination.'
'That's fantastic news. You're gonna love being a mom. I'll be glad to give you some parenting tips anytime' said Neal, winking.
They were interrupted by Jones who walked up, giving Neal a friendly pat on the back.
'Neal! It's great to see you. How's everything?' he said in greeting.
'Everything's great, Sara's back at work and believe it or not, Hope is turning 15 months old in a couple of weeks. You know, as much as I love being home with her, I'm really looking forward to working with you guys on this case.'
Peter appeared, coming down the stairs towards the small group that had congregated in the bullpen.
'Ah, the prodigal son returns' he said, walking up to the assembled group.
'How about we move the party up to the conference room? I'd like to brief you all on the case' he added as everyone started towards the stairs.
The crew got situated around the conference room table and Neal felt an immediate camaraderie he hadn't realized he'd been missing. It was nice to be back in the groove, using his mind other than to outsmart a toddler who was doing her best to stay up past her appointed naptime.
'Smirle Pharmaceuticals...' Peter began. 'They were fined several years back for driving up the price of certain prescription drugs by slowing down production. The FDA has called us in to investigate – they think they're at it again. Four drugs for which they have the exclusive patent have been in short supply over the past few months: Crobaplatin, Grimsar, Zolada and Ibexa. The first three are chemotherapy drugs and the last one is commonly used in advanced cases of Alzeimer's. There haven't been any shortages reported yet; many of the larger hospitals have stockpiled these drugs in their pharmacies but unless Smirle starts releasing larger quantities, there will be a shortage within a couple of months, even sooner with some of these drugs.'
'The FDA is sending someone to brief us later this week. In the meantime, let's look into their history and see if we can pin down what and who is behind this.' Peter said, standing.
Neal looked around the table at the familiar faces. Yes, it was definitely good to be back.
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Doctor Joanne Cooper's waiting room was quiet at four o'clock on a Monday afternoon. Sara had asked for a late day appointment so she wouldn't have to interrupt her workday but now she wished she was home already; she was tired and hungry and looking forward to a home cooked meal and Neal and Hope's smiling faces.
She glanced over curiously at the only other patient who sat waiting: a very pregnant young woman who looked like she was about to burst right there in the middle of the room. She gave the woman a small smile and returned to the dog eared People magazine she was holding in her hands, recalling the end of her pregnancy with Hope and how uncomfortable and stressed out she'd been the last few days before she gave birth.
Why was it she wanted to do this all over again? she asked herself not for the first time.
Sara heard her name being called and looked up, dolefully anticipating the unpleasant procedure; gynecological exams were never fun but getting poked was all relative after giving birth and suffering the indignities of morning sickness and the many other side effects of pregnancy. She was ushered into an examination room and instructed to change into a gown as she awaited Dr. Cooper's arrival.
'Hi Sara' the doctor said as she breezed in 'How are you? I can't believe I haven't seen you since your daughter's birth.'
'Hi' Sara answered, taking in the smiling face of the woman who'd been privy to her privates for the better part of ten years. 'Well, I've gone back to work and there never seems to be enough time for things like doctors' appointments' admitted Sara.
'So how is that beautiful girl of yours, Hope is it?' asked Dr. Cooper as she put on a pair of examination gloves.
'You have a good memory' answered Sara. 'Yes, it's Hope and she's fine – a little terror at times and an angel at others – a typical toddler, I guess.'
'Time does fly' said Dr. Cooper. 'Alright, let's do this' she said preparing to examine Sara. 'Any issues?'
'Not really. I still feel bloated at times and I've had a little bit of lower back pain. But I guess that's to be expected once you've had a baby. I've been trying to get pregnant again but we haven't had any luck yet' she added as she looked over at the doctor who was palpating her abdomen.
'We can talk about a few tricks when we're done. Sara do you have any pain, here?' she asked as she pressed down on Sara's left hip area.
'Just some tenderness, I wouldn't call it pain' answered Sara.
Once the unpleasant ritual was complete, Sara stepped into Dr. Cooper's office for a debriefing, waiting for her to return.
'Sara, here's a bit of literature you might find interesting on lovemaking positions to help you get pregnant. Truth be told, there's not a whole lot of research on the subject but any position that allows for deep penetration like missionary or doggy style is best. And if you are so inclined, you can stay lying down for a half hour after sex to give your husband's little swimmers a better chance but basically, just keep doing what you're doing.'
'Oh God! Don't tell my husband that. He's been reading everything he can find online' Sara exclaimed with a laugh. 'Next thing I know, he'll be wanting me to hang upside down with my legs tethered to the ceiling!'
'Well, there's a lot of poor advice on the internet but you're both healthy young people; just be patient and everything should be fine.' Dr. Cooper added, seemingly distracted.
'Okay. Well, thanks for the advice' Sara responded as she glanced absentmindedly at the pamphlet in her hands.
'Sara, there is one more thing. I'm feeling a mass on your left ovary. Masses are not that unusual and it's likely nothing to worry about but I'd really like you to have an ultrasound so I can have a better look.'
Sara looked at Joanne Cooper's relaxed face; this was an unexpected detour but if it could help in their quest to have another baby, it was well worth it, she supposed.
'There's a lab down on the main floor and they do take walk-ins so I'll give you a requisition. Why don't we meet again sometime next week and we can take a look at the results together' the good doctor continued.
'Sure' said Sara as she stood up to leave. 'I'll go see if they're open right now.'
'I think they're open until 8 on Mondays' Dr. Cooper added as Sara prepared to leave.
Sara grabbed her phone, dialing home as she waited for the elevator.
'Hey Repo' Neal answered with a smile in his voice. 'Are you on your way home?'
'The doctor is sending me for an ultrasound so I'm just headed down to the lab to see if they can do it right now. Did you pick up Hope, alright?' she asked.
'Yeah... and she's helping me make some pudding for dessert... Hope, Hope not with your hands, baby' Neal yelled into the phone.
Sara giggled as she imagined the scene back in their kitchen. 'I see you've got your hands full so I'll see you when I get home' she said before hanging up.
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By the time Hope was settled in for the night, Neal and Sara were both exhausted from their long day and Neal watched as his tired wife came down the stairs after having put their daughter to bed.
'Just in time' he said as he handed her a cup of tea. 'I just got everything cleaned up.'
They both fell onto the couch in the family room, Sara's feet instantly up in Neal's lap as she batted her eyelashes at him in the hopes of getting one of his famous Caffrey foot rubs.
'You know, I should never have started with those foot rubs, now, you expect them all the time' he muttered as she laughed.
'Well, when I get pregnant again, I expect it to be a nightly ritual' she said as Neal obliged, rubbing the insoles of her feet as Sara started to moan with pleasure.
He watched her face relax; he loved seeing her in those unguarded moments – so very un-Sara Ellis like.
'Well, when you do get pregnant, I will gladly oblige' he answered with a warm smile. 'So, how did it go at the doctor's?'
'Ah, same old, same old. You guys are so lucky you don't have to suffer the indignities of gynecological examinations. She did send me for an ultrasound though. She says there's a mass on my left ovary...'
'A mass?' Neal repeated, sounding alarmed.
'Honey, relax. She said it wasn't all that unusual. She just wants me to have it checked out considering we're trying to have a baby' Sara answered, wiggling her toes in a silent request for Neal to resume the wonderful foot rub he'd been administering.
'So, did she have any advice on getting pregnant?' he asked.
'She said...we should try having sex' Sara mewled playfully as she leaned in, lacing her arms around Neal's neck.
'Sex? Really? Wow, never thought of that...' he whispered back, his voice rough.
She shrugged as she pulled him in for a kiss. 'I suppose it's worth a try...'
TBC