Disclaimer: I sure as hell don't own Sailor Moon.

A/N: I have another account: SunrayShinningLight 1999.

Please note that the first paragraph(s) is from a nine-year old's point of view.

Chapter One

~Six Years Prior~

I hate walking home in the winter it's cold and my asthma doesn't like it either. Oh well I get cake today. And see my big sister!

Today is my ninth birthday so I guess there is something to be happy about. LALALALALA is all I am singing to myself on the way home. Usually my brothers and sisters would be walking home with me but I decided to go home alone today.

As I am just about to turn the corner a monster appears out of no where in front of me and I scream " What the heck are you supposed to be?!" The monster stares me down and says "I am here to collect energy for my queen." and all I'm thinking is HELP! Just as the monster is about to blast me this brooch thing appears in front of me in a sparkling light and of course I grab it. Just as I wrap my fingers around it words come into my head and I shout them out "Sun Cosmic Power, Make-up!".

I look down wondering where my clothes went. "Sailor Sun, shout out Cosmic Love Embrace." A kitty says from beside me.

I raise my hands doing what my tummy tells me to. In my hands is what mommy calls a scepter. "Cosmic Love Embrace!"

~Today~

My sister never did show up that day, not for any of our birthdays. Not even a damned card in the mail. I furiously wipe the traitor tears off my face, turning my back against the wind. It's September, why would I be thinking about my birthday when it's in March? Because my parents arranged a dinner with her and every time I think of her that dreaded memory is stirred.

That day I was going to tell my sister I had awakened as Sailor Sun but for the past five years it has remained my secret. That day I also got a scolding because I had called her a bitch. In my defense it's my sister's fault for swearing, when she lived with us.

"Eleanora!" Mom unlocks my door with her spare key. She got it after I developed the habit of locking my door when I wanted to be alone.

I ball my hands in fists and tense my shoulders. "What?!" I yell looking mom directly in the eyes.

"Haruka is waiting patiently down there for you to say hi and join us for dinner." Mom's tone is reasoning but I don't fall for her soft tone anymore.

I turn away hiding tears of hurt and anger. "Who ever said I wanted to see her again." I hear the coldness in my voice. Mom gasps and I turn around expecting to see Haruka behind me.

My expectations are let down. "Eleanora, she came to see you specifically." I shake my head and scoff in disgust.

"Why didn't she fucking think of that six years ago!?" I slam my fist down on the cement railing of my balcony. I have watched my mouth for a while now, since I'm spending most of my time with my two-year old sister, Ella my three year old daughter Rylan.

"Eleanora, give her chance." Mom pleads with me. I hear the longing in her voice.

From eaves dropping on her and dad's conversations I know she longs to see me smile because of Haruka, to see me cling to her like I used to. That girl is gone, the girl who longed to be in her sister's arms again.

"She had her chances on our birthdays and holidays those chances are gone." Mom leaves frustrated and upset.

I close my balcony doors, locking them. I hide myself in the darkest corner of my room and cry. I'm so sick of being pressured by everyone to try to re-build my relationship with Haruka. I don't want to what the hell would come out of it?

Michiru stands in front of me I stare at her feet. She kneels and lifts my chin. I jerk away from her. "Elora, your sister's pretty upset." Michiru uses Haruka's nickname for me trying to guilt trip me.

"It's Eleanora and don't guilt trip me that doesn't work any more and Haruka should be upset its her own damn fault that I don't want to see her." I look outside seeing the wind getting harsh.

"I'll contine calling you Elora because that nickname is what Haruka introduced you as. Haruka didn't mean to miss your birthdays, she was scheduled for races a lot of the time." I scoff getting up. I rip open the top drawer of my dresser and throw my brooch on my bed.

Michiru looks shocked while I'm just pissed off. "For fucking six years, I don't think so. My ninth birthday I wanted to tell you guys I awakened as Sailor Sun, my tenth birthday I needed support because bullying started, eleventh birthday I was in the hospital for a month because of asthma, twelvth birthday went into depression, six months after that a man forced himself on me, thirteenth birthday my first boyfriend cheated on me, my fourteenth birthday changed schools three days before because bullying went to cyber and physical!" I yell, ranting by now.

"Elora, you could've called us!" Michiru yells back. I shake my head lip quivering and tears spilling over.

"I did where the hell was Haruka all those times I needed her the most?!" I try yelling but my voice is too choked up with tears to sound angry.

What I sound like is a lost, helpless, child. I turn away hitting my closet door on the way out to the bathroom to wipe my face.

I put my glasses on the counter then wipe my face with a cold cloth. There's a knock at the door I ignore it. "Elora, please, let me talk to you." Haruka's choked up voice comes through the door.

I lock the door hearing the click of the lock. "No." I answer weakly.

A key unlocks the door, damn you mom. Haruka walks in without hesitation. "Baby please, let me explain..." I cut her off with fresh tears.

"Explain what Haruka? I don't need an explanation, you weren't there when any of us needed you! When I called you never picked up! How the hell do you plan on explaining that?!" My voice goes up a slight octave due to the tears.

"Please don't cry." Haruka mutters, crying herself.

"Oh trust me I'm trying but your making it harder!" I confess pushing past her and slamming my bedroom door.

I drag my chair over and shove it under the door knobs, classic barricade. Haruka doesn't even try to open my door, I hear her walk right past. I freeze remembering that I left Michiru in here.

"You really think I'm going to let you lock your siblings or parents out?" She asks removing the chair from the doors.

"Whatever." I mutter crawling under my blankets and letting tears fall. I lost the energy to fight back so I'll let them win, this time.