"Wake up, you will be late for your first day!" I heard my mother yell. I groaned and rolled off my bed and stumbled into the bathroom and turned on the shower. I wasn't excited for the new school; it pained me to think about school. I looked down at my arm and saw the scars from weeks ago, looking straight at me and reminding me how much people don't want me in their lives. How much people wanted me to die, I knew my mother and father hated me with passion; like I was never good enough to be a part of their family. I turned the hot water off and jumped out of the shower and went to look for some clothes. I stuck with my usual look; skinny jeans and a grey shirt plus eyeliner and my shoes. I got beat every day for wearing eyeliner, being called a fag and a loser. People told me I wasn't wanted and no one will ever love me, that I should just kill myself now. What people didn't know is that I have tried servile times to kill myself, but sleeping pills didn't work and I couldn't hang myself. I sighed at the thought and grabbed my school bag before running downstairs. "Shaun! I forgot to tell you, you are going to an all-boys school! Isn't that wonderful!" she said with the biggest smile on her face. I know she is faking the smile; she doesn't care about anyone but herself. She knows I'm gay, she knows boys from my old school called me names and made my life hell. She knew all this, and yet she puts me in an all-boys school? "Why?" I said, trying not to sound angry. "So you can meet a nice boy and be happy!" she said, still smiling. I didn't say anything, I didn't know what to say. "Come on, go out to the car I just can't wait for you bring your first boyfriend home for me and your father to meet!" she said, clapping her hands. I rolled my eyes and walked outside to the car and jumped in the front seat. I quickly grabbed my jacket from the back seat and threw it on, I can't have kids at school seeing.
Mum dropped me off at the gates and drove away without looking back, stupid bitch. She was the only one who knew I was gay, dad didn't know and I hope he never will know. He'd kick me out first chance he got, I know he hates me, just like everyone else. As I walked into the school I already wanted to leave, I can tell I'm going to hate it here. I looked around and saw a table under a tree, where no one was. I reached the table and sat down and pulled out my iPod, music helps with everything in my life. I closed my eyes and let out a sigh, I hated this school already. I took out my earphones and heard voices near me, great. I looked up and see a group of guys walking over to my table, there was about six of them, I didn't get a good look at their faces but from what I saw, they were buttfuck ugly. As they got closer and closer, they got bigger and bigger. "Oi, you the new kid?" one said, taking a seat across from me. I nodded, too afraid to speak. "You look like you belong in an all-girl school" he said laughing, his friends joining in. "Yeah, you look like a fag" I heard one say. They all continued to call me names and pay out my look. But all I could think of is dying, and how much I didn't want to be here anymore. "Guys, leave him alone" I heard a new voice say. I looked up and saw a blonde headed boy, lip ring, gorgeous blue eyes and his hair straight while the back in different directions. He was a sex god. I felt my stomach do cartwheels when he looked at me, he was gorgeous. "Whatever" the guys said and walked off. I looked up at the blonde god, but he was already sitting down on the table, looking at me. "Sorry about my friends, hope they weren't too hard on you" he said, grinning. Even his voice was sex god like, my heart sped up. "I, er no it's fine" I stumbled on my words, shit he probably thinks I'm a total loser now. He laughed, "I'm Andy, who might you be" he said winking and laughing. I swallowed, "Um, I'm Shaun". "Cute name, I hope I see you round Shaun" he said and got up and left. I let out a sigh, he was so gorgeous. Wait, Shaun he is straight. There is no way in hell that he is gay, even if he was gay, he wouldn't fall for me, nobody needs or wants me. I sighed again and stood up from the table just as the bell rang.
I looked at my timetable and saw I had Math then a free. I walked over to the math room and walked in and sat down at the back, just as the kids started to walk in. I sighed in relief, those guys weren't in my class, thank fuck. I looked down at my desk and saw a sharp rock on it, it will have to do. I picked it up and made sure no one was looking before I dag in into my skin. It hurt a bit, but it wasn't enough. I threw the rock down and looked back up to see blue eyes looking at me from across the room, Andy had seen.
School dragged on and I kept away from everyone, not listening to people talking around me and not listening to people calling me names. Once the finally bell rang, I lept from my chair and bolted for the school grounds. Mum had told me in the car that I had to walk, but I don't plan on going home just yet. I turned on my heel and headed for the shops near the school, it looked like a pretty bogan place so there wouldn't be anyone I knew here. I crossed the road and headed into the shops and felt myself pulled down to the ground. I looked and saw a man in his late thirties, smiling at me with blood shot eyes. "I haven't seen you around here before, I'm Liam. Who are you?" he smirked, letting my arm go and lighting up a cigarette and sucking on it. "I'm Shaun" I said bluntly, not bothering to get up. He smiled and pasted me the cigarette, "Want some?" he asked. I shook my head, no fucking way am I touching that death stick. "Ah, you want something stronger" he said as he reached into his pocket and grabbed out a zip lock bag full of green shit. "Weed? You're giving me weed?" I said, this is so stupid; this guy was going to get caught. He smiled and nodded, putting the bag in my head and getting up and walking away.
I sat there looking at the bag, wondering if I should take it, wondering if it would make my life better. "Shaun?" I heard and my head shot up to see Andy looking down at me. I stumbled to my feet and looked at the gorgeous boy, eyes looking at the bag in my hands. "Is that from Liam?" he asked, taking the bag carefully from my fingers. I nodded, too ashamed of myself to speak to Andy. I heard him sigh, I watched him walk over to the bin and throw the bag into it. "Shaun, promise me you won't talk to Liam again? He is wasted half the time and only wants your money. Please for me?" his eyes full of worry. For a minute it looked like he cared for my wellbeing, for a minute it looked like he wanted me to be here. I nodded my head and turned on my heel to walk away, then I heard footsteps running after me. "Hey, it's Friday. Wanna come over?" Andy asked, putting both his hands on my shoulders. I smiled and nodded, this would be a good chance to get to know Andy. He grinned and grabbed my wrist and began running to his house. It hurt when he touched my arms, but I didn't let him know that.