This is my second OC fanfic, the first being When you were mine, and I've taken a slightly different approach. Please read and review! Flashbacks are in italics.

Disclaimer: As much as I'd love to own Seth and Summer, I don't. The OC and all it's characters belong to Fox.

No going back

Chapter 1

A silent tear fell down her cheek as she hugged the photograph close to her chest before examining it again. It was a picture of her and Seth at their favourite booth at the diner and as she stared at their happy faces,more tears slipped down her cheeks. She had never been one to cry, Summer had built up a tall strong wall around herself after her mother had left. She didn't cry every other night like Marissa did, instead Summer dealt with her sadness another way. She'd keep all her tears locked up, her emotions bottled up, and if she ever felt like bawling so much that she could not hold it in, she'd lock herself in her bathroom where no one could see or hear her.

Well, no one except Seth.

He had been the only one to see her break down. He had been the only one to see her vunerable. Not even Marissa knew most of the details about her mother leaving but Seth knew everything, as if he had been sitting next to her in bed that night when she had woken up and found her mother packing. She felt safe with him and it felt good to open up with him. And he never made her feel weak or unimportant and he never looked at her with pity.

So why did she want to throw away the best thing that had ever happened to her?

She knew why. They were going to different colleges. They were going to be miles apart. He'd be crowded with girls who were so much more smarter and nicer then Summer. Girls who carried around books instead of Chanel handbags. After spending all that time with girls like that, what would make him go back to Summer?

She was scared. She did not want to get hurt. Again. For, what was it now, the third time? Or maybe the fourth. She had lost count of how many times he had hurt her. But the truth was, she iloved/i him. And there would never be anybody who was like Seth in any aspect. There would be no comic book loving, understanding, Chrismukka-inventing, random blabbling geek who would sweep her off her feet like Seth had. He was special and if she let him go now then he'd never come back. He'd probably get together with a smart pretty genius and they'd go on to get married and win a Nobel Prize while she'd be stuck with a water polo player type guy who would always take staring at her chest.

Okay, so maybe she was exaggerating. About the Nobel Prize bit anyway.

Senior year was meant to be "all time". Why was it ruined with all these decisions about the future. Couldn't they just live in the present and be happy?

Only they weren't happy. They hadn't been happy for quite a while. Ever since their first huge argument about where to go to college. Since then, Seth and Summer's conversation was always small talk and even Ryan and Marissa had noticed. And when Marissa noticed something that was going on that didn't involve her to any extent then Summer knew that things were bad.

Maybe the spark wasn't there anymore. Or maybe Seth didn't think that it was there. She knew it was there, she loved spending each and every second with him. But what if he was bored of her by now? What if he had realized that he did not want to spend the next couple of years with her? It was bound to happen soon enough, she had been expecting it for three years. Well, when in those three years they were together that is. And if she broke up with him then it would make everything so much more easier, much more easier to handle.

Right?

No, she was being stupid. She loved him and he loved her and that was all they needed. So they had had a couple of fights over the past couple of weeks but it would be okay. They'd get past it and go back to the way they were. The way Seth had loved. It was Seth and Summer, and Ryan and Marissa. That's the way it was and that's the way it was always going to be. Summer would make sure that their long distance relationship worked. They'd be together.

Her actions, however, spoke otherwise because she reached up and tore the photograph of her and Seth into two parts before sobbing into her seats. She had never been a loud crier but there were special occasions that proved otherwise.

Twenty three year old Summer Roberts pushed her black sunglasses ontop of her head of bouncy but tamed curls as she extended her finger and traced the hem of the cloth in front of her which lay in front of her on the desk of her office in New York. After inspecting it for a little while longer, she turned to her coworker Denise and nodded in approval.

"It should be okay. The material is just right but we'll have to have it dyed because Mrs. Coulter wants it in rose pink" Summer said, placing her finger on her chin and frowning slightly.

"I'll get it done right away. Custom made gowns are always the hardest" Denise said, carefully picking up the cloth and replacing it in the box. "Thanks, Summer. See you later"

Summer nodded her head as Denise walked away and then she walked over to her black leather chair and settled into it, leaning back and sighing a deep happy sigh. She loved her job and especially her new promotion. Everything here at New York was amazing, she was standing on her own two feet and she loved every second of it.

Okay, so she wasn't literally standing on her own two feet. Her dad sent cheques every month and even though Summer didn't need the money, she always cashed the cheques because buying the latest pair of Jimmy Choo's from her father's money was a tradition ever since she had been old enough to pronounce the word "Choo" and she wasn't about to break that tradition.

Suddenly, the phone on her desk rang and Summer reached for it.

"Kate Segal designs, Summer Roberts speaking, how may I help you?" Summer asked in a falsey sticky sweet tone after picking up the reciever.

"SUM!" the person on the other line squealed.

"COOP!" Summer squealed back, equally excited. "We haven't talked in ages. How've you been?"

"Sum, I have to tell you something really exciting!" Marissa gushed, ignoring Summer's question.

"Ooh did Brad Pitt turn up at your doorstep?" Summer asked.

"No"

"Well then, is your mom leaving?"

"Err...no"

"Oh, I know!" Summer said excitedly, "You got Newport's Woman of the Year Award. That's amazing, Coop! I always knew that you'd get it and you must be the youngest person ever to recieve it at only twenty three..."

"Sum, NO!" Marissa suddenly shouted and then she took a deep breath and said, "Ryan proposed!"

"WHAT?"

"It was so romantic, Summer! We were at my favourite spot on the beach and he sort of plopped down on one knee and proposed right there" Marissa went on, eager to get all the details out.

"OMG Coop, that's the best news since..." Summer hesitated for a moment, thinking, "Heck, that's the best news EVER! Congratulations! You have to tell me all the details, the ring, what he said, what YOU said..."

"You already know what I said" Marissa replied, giggling.

"Yeah, but how did you say it? Was it a 'of course I will' sort of yes, or an 'err ok' yes or an OMG-I've-been-waiting-for-this-my-whole-life kind of yes?"

The two continued to chat for an hour, going over the littlest details before Summer suddenly remembered something.

"OMG, Coop, you didn't tell me about wedding details! When do you plan on getting married?"

"The sooner the better. I mean, we've been together so long, and I just don't want to wait any longer" Marissa replied passionatly, "So you better hurry up and get that ticket booked".

"What?"

"Well, you're my maid in honour so you'll have to help plan my wedding. So in order to do that, you have to be here! In Newport" Marissa replied, all giddy.

"In Newport?" Summer repeated blankly.

"No, in space" Marissa joked.

Summer cringed, Marissa had never been good with comedy. Summer had decided that her best friend should stick to the dramatic side years ago.

"Oh Sum, I've got to go, Ryan's here" Marissa suddenly said, her voice bursting with happiness and pride. "Catch you later?"

"Yeah, sure" Summer said, recovering, "Congratulations again, hun, love ya"

"Love ya too. Bye!" Marissa replied before hanging up.

Summer stared at the folders that Denise had put on her desk a little while ago. She was truly happy for her friend but going back to Newport meant seeing the one person who she had tried so hard to erase from her memory in the past five years.

Going back to Newport meant seeing Seth Cohen again.

At that precise moment, all the way in Newport, Seth sat at his desk as he stared at the blank piece of paper in front of him and began chewing the back of his pencil.

"Knock, knock" said someone at the door.

Seth looked up and saw Anna standing in the doorway of his office. Her blonde hair had changed from her high school days - it was now straight and up to her shoulders and she wore it straight and neat. Her black suit made her slim body look even slimmer and as she headed towards Seth's desk, there was a small glint in her bright blue eyes.

"Still having trouble coming up with a new character?" Anna asked, settling herself on Seth's desk.

"Yes, I don't know why they even want a new character. The threesome are awesome" Seth said and then added as an afterthought, "I didn't mean for that to rhyme".

"The threesome are awesome" Anna said earnestly, "Or actually the trio sounds better. But you know that the comics are missing something. Even Bad Science noticed it..."

"I could always add you in" Seth said, looking up suddenly.

Anna laughed, "No way. I'm just one of the masterminds behind these comics. I'm going to stick with drawing the villians and the extra's. The main character's are all yours".

Seth put his head into his hands and let out a loud groan.

"Come on, if at first you don't suceed..." Anna said positively.

"Don't try again?" Seth asked, lifting his head up to stare at her.

"Well, you know I've always liked the fantastic four..." Anna began.

"No, Anna" Seth cut in sharply. "I'm not bringing her back into the comics".

"I know it'll be really hard to draw her again, Seth" Anna continued, her warm eyes shining with sympathy. "But the comics just haven't been the same since those first couple of issues. Please just think about it"

"No" Seth replied, his tone firm and final.

Anna let out a small sigh but she nodded her head and got off the desk.

"Anyway, I've got some work to do so I better get going" she said, exiting the office. Then she stuck her head around the doorway and said, "But remember, the glass is always full"

"Yeah, yeah. Please just take your optimism someplace else" Seth mumbled, picking up his pencil.

He closed his eyes, trying to come up with a new character. But it was no use. Everytime he tried to think of a different shade of hair colour, her silky black hair came into his mind and he longed to reach his hand out and admire her hair again. And he saw her deep chocolate eyes again and her flawless skin and luscious red lips...

Letting out a deep sigh, Seth picked up his pencil and started to draw again.