Hey guys.

First FanFic, so please be kind in your thoughts =D

Reviews would be much appreciated.

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chapterONE

I told myself not to worry. Yeah, Seattle was bigger, noisier, and scarier than tiny Forks, but I'd lived here before and coped just fine. It was going to be a big change, of course, but I'm a strong, independent woman, and it's about time I proved that.

As Eleanor Roosevelt once said, "Do one thing everyday that scares you". When Angela, my dear sweet therapist – whom without I would not be standing here today – quoted that saying to me, I stared at her like she was nuts. Why would anyone want to do something that scared them? I quickly learned it was all about the risks and experiences of life. I owed my life to Angela. She saved me when everyone else had given up trying.

But that was all in the past. Moving to Seattle is all about the future. I'd left here years ago when I was about 7 years old. Now I'm 22. Yep, it's been a long time, and I don't remember much of my time in Seattle as a 7 year old. As I looked around nothing looked familiar, no past memories were jogged. But that's okay. I came here for a new start. I came here to search for something. What is it that I'm searching for, you ask? I'll let you know when I figure it out.

"Bella? Bella! BELLA!" I turned, bewildered, my slow reactions catching sight of only a flash of black hair, when my body was engulfed into a crippling hug.

"Alice? Fuck, what are you doing here?!" I stared wide-eyed at my former best friend. I say former, because we hadn't spoken or seen each other in over 6 years.

Alice had been living in Forks with her mother when I moved there with Charlie, my dad. We had instantly recognized each other as kindred spirits and began an inseparable friendship.

We did everything together. Hung out together, binged out together, gossiped together, celebrated birthday's together; everything together. She was every bit like the sister I had craved for as a child.

But a little after I had turned 15, Alice broke the one promise we'd made to each other that we swore we'd never even think about breaking. Best friends forever and always.

She had been distant for weeks before she told me that she was leaving. When she first mentioned going to see her dad, I thought it was just going to be for a couple of weeks. It wasn't ideal, and I hated when she left for summer breaks with her brother and dad who lived in New York, but I always knew she'd be coming back.

I'd shrugged it off with a simple, "It's going to suck here without you", thinking that in just a few weeks we'd be going shopping, swapping clothes, trying to find the perfect ensembles for Brian Gilman's 18th birthday bash. It was going to be the party of the year, and Alice and I were ecstatic that we'd been invited.

A week before the party I'd gone to Alice's house, Gobsmacker Gumballs in hand, expecting to fill out So Hot, So Not, and Debatable piles with the whole of her wardrobe contents. Instead I'd been welcomed with a lot of boxes, most packed, some half-packed. I'd stared open mouthed at the scene before me. What was going on?!

Mary Brandon, Alice's mother had been sitting cross legged on the wooden floors, wrapping a glass ornament in newspaper…

"Bella, how are you, honey?" she smiled warmly at me. "Alice is still packing her room. With all the clothes she owns, it's going to be a long time before she finishes," she continued, rolling her eyes affectionately, oblivious to my confused silence. "I may have received this amazing opportunity for a job in Paris, but this packing is murderous! Honestly, the position of Head of Department may not be enough to weigh out this torture!" she exclaimed, sighing dramatically.

"Head…department…Paris?" I stuttered, having absolutely no idea what this woman was on about.

Mary (she refused to be called Mrs. Brandon) gazed at me quizzically, moving a black ringlet of hair out of her grey eyes. Mary was, undoubtedly and just like her daughter, absolutely gorgeous. You would never have believed that she had a teenage daughter and son.

"Alice didn't tell you? Ralph Lauren, the fashion company I work for, offered me a Head of Department position in Paris. It's absolutely dreamy, isn't it? I can just imagine myself finding the perfect man in the City of Love." She sighed dreamily, but turned her attention back to me quickly. "That's why Alice is moving to New York to stay with Carlisle and Edward. She was extremely happy for me, of course, but she said she wouldn't be able to cope with moving so far away. Carlisle and Edward are actually here, helping us pack and helping me get all my junk shipped off to Paris. They're so excited to have Alice go home with them. It hasn't been easy on them. Alice and Edward, I mean. They were immensely close as toddlers. Alice was devastated when Carlisle left for New York. But she was far more devastated when Edward wanted to stay with Carlisle after falling in love with New York when he spent summer vacation up there. I missed him too." She smiled sadly, knowing she'd have to say goodbye to them both soon.

At that moment, an astonishingly handsome man wandered into the room from the back door, his keys jangling noisily from the waistband of his jeans. He was obviously matured of age, only a very slight dust of grey in his otherwise blonde hair. It could only be Alice's father, Carlisle.

"Okay, so all the garden tools and glass pots you have out there are packed and loaded into the truck," he looked around seeing the packed boxes, only one or two not sealed. "So you're just about done here I see. How's Alice's packing? Does she need help?" he looked toward the staircase that lead upstairs, when he noticed me for the first time. He smiled warmly. "Ah, how rude of me. Carlisle Cullen." He extended his right hand, grasping mine briefly. "You must be Isabella. Alice never stops talking about you. I think she'll be missing you more than she'll ever miss Forks," he grinned.

"Please call me Bella." I said softly, finally realizing that Alice was leaving me. For good this time. Never coming back…

I ended up going to the party alone, after barely saying goodbye to Alice. I was too upset to talk to her about it, so all I did was send her off with an awkward hug and a soft "goodbye". After she walked out that door with Mary and Carlisle (Edward was joining them later), I remember staring at that door and whispering "I'll miss you…" before succumbing to the tears that refused to be held in any longer.

The party was a blast - as promised - according to everyone else who hadn't been sitting in a corner wondering what they were doing there, and how their 'so-called' best friend could do this to them.

I got drunk for the first time that night. And even now, I still couldn't remember most of the night. The most important memories lay locked in the back of my mind, somewhere I couldn't access them.

Which is why I woke up the next morning, in Brian Gilman's guest bedroom, my underwear on the floor, wondering where my virginity was.

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I know it's short, but never fear! More is to come! =D

Anyhooz, questions, comments, criticisms?

Reviews would be lovely.