Sir Integra was sitting peacfully smoking her cigar while doing a little paper work. "Hmmmm." She was emotionless as always. "Normally Alucard would come around to flirt. Well it's better he's not here." She smlightly smiled to herself. " SIR INTEGRAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!" A glee-ful Alucard came through the wall to see Sir Integra.
" What is it Alucard?" Her expressionless face turned to an angered, seemingly depressed face."Well... I was just, you know, thinking about you." He said with a devilish smile. " OH, I know u were thinking about me. Since when do you not! " She rolled her eyes.
"Ok, anyways. Iwas imagining us on a honey moon after we had married." Sir Integra just ignored him and continued to work. " You wanna listen?" "Shoot." She announced. " Well we were on the beach and then we went to our bungolow. You run into my arms saying ' Oh Alucard please! tonight!!!!???!!' And I answer 'Yes, tonight we may.' With a calm soothing voice. Next u change into some SEXAY langerai (spelt wrong), that is blue langerai!!" Alucard ttemps to make a sexy growl.
Sir Integra quivers slightly. "Hehe. We start kissing and I lightly push you onto the bed. Next I drink your blood as if you had NO idea of that" Sir Integra drops her pencil. "wh..wha...what did you just say?!?" She questions. "I thought you weren't listening? Anyways that's not the point. Where was I? Oh ya, I turn you into a vampire! We caress each other and---"
Integra cuts him off and pulls out her pistol " THAT IS IT!!!!!!!!!!!!! DAMN IT!?! IM SICK OF YOUR SICK, TWISTED, DIRTY FANTASIES!! YOUR DEADDDDD!!!!!!!!!" Integra shoots 3 times and Alucard dodges each one. " CALM DOWN LADY---" Alucard tries to calm her down but fails " YOU WILL ADRESS ME AS MASTER OR YOU'LL BE IN SHITTTT!!!" " OKAY IM SORRY!" He appoligizes. The next 5 bullets hit him, 1 in the head, 3 in the chest and the last in the leg. "ARGGGGG!" He squeals in pain.
Integra twitches. " THAT'LL TEACH YOU TO BRING THOSE NASTY THING TO MEEEE!" Seras walks in. "Oh, have I interupted something?" Seras partially blushes and backs up a bit. " No. Come in. And Alucard, LEAVEEEEEEEE!!!" She yells. "I guess master didn't respect your privacy? You shoulda seen what i did to Pip!" They both laugh .
(ALUCARD AND PIP IN THE LIVING ROOM)
" What happened to you?" Pip question's. "You don't wanna know! What happened to you?" He ask's. Pip exclaims " Let's just say, never grope your fledgling!"