Author's Note: First of all, Final Fantasy XIII-2 and it's characters are the property of Square-Enix. I'm making no money from this story, and no infringement is intended.
This is a Hope-centric bit of character exploration (double meaning probably intended) that contains full-on HopeLight smut. When we first meet Hope again in -010AF- there was just so much HopeLight fodder in the scene that I had to do this. If you don't like Hope x Lightning or sexual themes involving masturbation, you should hit the back button. For everyone still left, I hope you enjoy it!
-010 AF - Yaschas Massif – Paddra Ruins
Hope Estheim pushed a lock of silver hair from his eyes as he wearily leaned back in his seat. He flung his gloves carelessly onto the table. Tonight he felt nearly four times older than his twenty-four years. He'd been ecstatic to meet Serah again, and even more-so to confirm that his suspicions about Light not being crystallized in the pillar were correct. Everything he'd been working towards for the last ten years had been to reunite with his friends again... to reunite with her again. For the first time in a long time he felt that it might really be possible, but he was utterly lost on how he should proceed from here. He hoped desperately that Serah and Noel's mission would help him at least figure out where to start looking next.
It was the middle of the night, those few and precious hours when he could find any privacy while the researchers and workers slumbered. Even if someone woke, the guard at the bottom of the hill had orders to make sure he remained undisturbed.
Still deep in his thoughts, Hope activated the Oracle Drive beside him. He couldn't count how many nights he'd participated in this same ritual. He studied the fuzzy images of Lightning being projected into the empty air around him. She seemed so close that he could almost feel the touch of her hand on his arm. He reached up to trace her features in the air, knowing that the warmth of her touch on his skin was merely an illusion. These were only projections of light. "Projections of Light," he smiled bitterly at the the pun. Lightning was as impossible to grasp right now as her ephemeral namesake, and Hope was lonely beyond all words. He didn't even have his l'Cie friends around to confide those feelings to someone who might understand.
That was the reason he'd been so enthusiastic upon meeting Serah and Noel this afternoon. He'd immediately grasped the younger Farron's hands excitedly, and then he'd forgotten to let go as he'd lost himself in how similar Serah's features were to her older sister's. Her eyes were that same entrancing blue and her hair was the same fine texture and soft pink. For a moment he'd almost seen the more elegantly angular face of the older Farron superimposed over Serah's permanently girlish features. It had been patently embarrassing, though Serah seemed to suspect his true reasons if her continued talk about Light had been any indication. His boyish crush had never been well hidden, and even as a man he seemed singularly unable to conceal his continuing feelings for the former soldier.
He focused his attention entirely upon the images dancing before his eyes, and as always he was torn apart by two distinctly different emotions. Just to see images of his Light alive somewhere filled him with heartbreaking joy, but knowing that she was fighting a desperate battle alone left him terrified for her. That fear made him privately berate himself as sick for feeling any happiness at these visions, until a small voice inside countered with the thought that as long as Lightning was alive there was still hope. Somehow, he had to find a way to get to her. As Fang had once threatened to tear down the sky to save Vanille, Hope vowed to break through time itself to get to Lightning.
"I will find you, Light, and I will protect you," Hope whispered in the still night, switching the projection over to the one that showed Lightning clearly.
Concentrating on Lightning's face alone, he ran his hand along his arm trying to remember how her touch had truly felt. She had touched him so many times when trying to comfort and protect him. The memory of her hugging him tightly was a bittersweet balm as he tried to feel that connection again. He imagined that his fingers were hers as he traced a pleasurable line up his arm and began to caress himself in the ways that he'd only wished Lightning had touched him.
He stroked his cheek and jawbone lightly with the backs of his fingers, as he gazed intently at her image. Mentally, he overlaid it with memories of her sea blue eyes gazing into him so deeply he could have sworn she'd seen all the way into the darkest corners of his soul. His fingers gently grazed the erogenous skin along the sides of his neck, and his fingertips flickered over his parted lips as he imagined the sensations of Lightning's lips kissing him. He dipped the tip of his index finger further into his mouth rubbing back against it with the tip of his tongue as his other hand lingered around his collarbones. His heart thundered in his chest and the rush of blood made him feel hot all over.
He unclasped the fastenings of his jacket and yanked his tie away. Growing frustrated at the layers of clothing, he tugged at the buttons of his shirt, revealing his lithe, muscular torso. His chest rose and fell with quick shallow breaths, as he continued his self-exploration, allowing his nails to dig into his flesh slightly as he clawed a meandering pink trail down his ribcage. He jerked with a mixture of pleasure and pain as his nails passed over the sensitive flesh of his nipples, already hard in the cool night breeze. Biting back a groan, Hope pinched and caressed his pale nipples with one hand. He used the other to trace circles across his taut abs with his nails, teasing himself as he allowed his hand to come ever closer to the top of his pants. He imagined that it was Lightning's mouth toying with those sensitive peaks, nipping and sucking gently at his flesh and that it was her nails raking across his belly... her hand threatening to dip below the waistband of his gray twill pants.
He could still remember the scent of her hair and the softness of her breasts as she'd pulled him against her and held on so tightly. She'd smelled unbelievably wonderful, and he could only imagine the taste of her. The thought stirred an acute tightening in his groin, and his confined cock throbbed with the need to be freed and touched.
Hope eased the buttons and zipper open and pulled down his underpants so that he could grasp his hardon with one hand. He massaged his balls with the other hand, tracing the seam of his scrotum with his fingertips as his sac tensed under the attention. Illuminated only by the light of the projector, he could barely see the trail of silver hairs that led down from his navel and curled around the base of his stiff length.
As the images replayed yet again, Hope wondered if Light could see him from where she was. The thought of her seeing him like this both horrified him and thrilled him. He'd never liked to confront things when he was younger; and confessing his feelings to an Ex-Guardian Corps member, who had probably only ever viewed him as a child, was going to be a huge battle. If Light were watching him right now, would she be disgusted, or would the sight of him longing for her while he pleasured himself in the night secretly arouse her?
He closed his eyes and imagined Lightning in the world of the vision touching herself while she watched his long fingers wrapped around his cock... pumping up and down... his movements growing rougher and faster with his increasing need. He imagined driving deep into her, over and over while she whimpered helpless, satisfied noises at his ravishment of her body. He imagined how wet, and soft, and tight her pussy would feel clamped around his dick... and how it would feel to hear her call his name at the pinnacle of her ecstasy.
Hope realized that he was whispering aloud all the dirty, intimate things that he wanted to say to Lightning while he fucked her. "I need you, Light," he groaned softly, "I want to fuck you senseless. I want you to moan like an animal for me... to call my name... to want nothing more in this world than to feel my cock filling you and making you cum... to want me to fill you with my cum. Oh, God, Light!" he gasped as quietly as he could manage, his hand jerking faster. Hope rolled his head from side to side, thready moans of desire escaping his throat.
He hoped that Lightning could see him right now, and that she was bringing herself to the verge as she watched. He could clearly see her in his mind. Her fingers would be buried in her pink-haired pussy, and her juices would be coating the tops of her thighs as she fingered her clit and plunged her fingers into herself... imagining that it was him moving inside her. Her face would be twisted into the most magnificent expression of abandon as she came. He could feel his climax building to a crescendo as the images of Lightning played behind his closed eyelids.
His fist moved swiftly and deftly as he allowed the tightness in his entire body to crash upon him. He felt nearly crushed by the tension. His face contorted with the agony of his breaking need, and he called out for Lightning by her true name. "Claire!" Her name was like a prayer issuing from his lips. Then the relief of his orgasm flooded through his body, shattering him utterly. His balls clenched as he violently shot his seed into the night, and a rapturous tremor flooded his groin. He could only pant rapidly as the sensations of heavenly release mixed with the visions in his head, and he slumped backwards in his chair. His features went slack with satiation, and he shivered slightly.
He dreamed of Lightning lying spent alongside him as they held each other close and exchanged tender words and unhurried kisses. That was what he longed for most of all. He wanted to share that intimacy, that bond, with her. He wanted to be partners in the truest sense of the word. Since the disastrous incident of the Purge, there was no place in the world where he felt safer or happier than in Lightning Farron's presence. There was no place that felt more like home, and he wanted to go home again. He wanted to become "home" to her as well.
It was some minutes before Hope regained his senses enough to even move. Finally stirring, he reached for the handkerchief in his left pocket and began to wipe away the semen that had spilled across his hand and over his stomach. In the aftermath of his actions, he still felt like a guilty fourteen-year-old hiding his private activities in the Vile Peaks. Reluctantly, he set about straightening his attire and hiding any trace of his activities here so that he might return to his empty tent. He could never tell if he felt better or more profoundly lonely after these sessions.
He knew that Alyssa would more than willingly jump into his bed, but she wasn't the woman he wanted. She felt wrong in a way that was downright disturbing to Hope, wrong in a sense that he'd never gotten from another living being. Alyssa seemed undaunted by all the times he'd refused her touches or how quickly he would remove her hands whenever she tried to take his arm. Her forced cute-act was the polar opposite of Lightning's rough but honest presence, and that artifice held no interest for him.
Hope would continue alone, walking the path he'd chosen while he worked towards his goal the way Lightning had taught him. He would find Lightning, and he would protect her as promised.
"I'm going to save everyone I can. I'll get all of our friends back together. Then we are coming for you. It's not a matter of can or can't. There are some things in life you just do. Right, Light?" He smiled affectionately at the image of the pink-haired warrior as he turned off the Oracle Drive.