A/N: Random fluff… hey, if you want to know what kind of a guy I really am, click on the lj-link on my bio, and check out the comics about my life.
What would you do if you were dictator of the world?
Kai: Easy. First, clear the global crap out of the way, or he won't let me hear the end of it.
Famine: I rule production and distribution of food. Problem solved.
Diseases: Castrate sick and stupid people so they won't multiply. Problem solved.
Wars: Capture and execute other dictators who want to oppose me. Problem solved.
Oh, and blow up Hollywood. All of it.
Now, to the important matters: our living conditions. There will be a medium island with real seasons, and a large one next to it. If perfect island can't be found, we built one. There will be only one building on the island, the large Victorian mansion we live in, surrounded by lush, silent forests. We will have an expert staff at call 24/7, which stays out of sight unless we call for it. Including the finest chefs in the world, even though there are excellent restaurants on the other island. In case he feels like "eating out" or some nonsense like that.
And a few of those ugly little dogs he likes for some unholy reason. You know, the smelly ones with nothing but wrinkles for a face. Disgusting.
Under the mansion there will be a little cave for our private jet, ready to take us to the other island, or anywhere in the world he wants. The other island will have a city, so he can "be around people", the little twat. And there will be an enormous amusement park, zoo, water world, beach, movie theatres, cafes, restaurants, malls and God knows what. All of that crap, all the so-called entertainment, will be on our neighbour island.
But on our island, there will be nothing. I'll make sure to keep him entertained…
The damned dogs may sleep with us, because I know he'll never forgive me if they don't, but I'll get some scientists to rid them of that smell somehow. Mankind has invented all sorts of things, surely they can make a few non-smelling dogs.
And if he gets itchy and starts talking about "starting a family" or something like that, we'll grab the jet and fly to some x-poor country and look around. When he sees a brat he likes, we adopt it. If it has parents? Well, that will be taken care of.
What else? Oh, and the neighbour island will have to have a Wonka factory.
What would you do if you were dictator of the world?
Tyson: What? Uh, I dunno… Give the job to someone else? I already have what I want :P