Bladers with a list 7/23/11 Part three of Blitzkrieg boys true personalities series.
"Kai I'm bored!" whined Ian as he latched onto Kai's prone form. Kai sat up from where he was lazing on the hill and sighed.
"You won't leave me alone until you find something to do right?" he stated more than asked when he saw the pout on Ian's face.
"Fine. Here's my lab top, Google things to do when you're bored." Kai pushed his lab top towards Ian and went to lie back down but Ian snuggled up beside him and began to type. Kai sighed once more before turning so he was lying on his side and watched Ian search.
"Aha! This is it! The first one says:
THINGS YOU CAN DO WITH VERY LITTLE
See what's in your neighbor's rubbish/trash
(Amusement Potential: 20-30 minutes)
you can learn a lot about people by what they throw out. You might uncover some dark secret about them. Plus, they might be throwing out something with value that still works, like a VCR or some porn mags.
Watch TV, repeat everything said in Italian accent
(Amusement Potential: 5-10 minutes)
Sort of entertaining. Include flamboyant shoulder shrugs for added impact, or go for a Marlon Brando set of grunts.
Send spooky emails
(Amusement Potential: 15-60 minutes)
Look up someone's CV on the web, do some research on them via Google and then send them an email full of personal references claiming to be an ex-work colleague who fell in love with their shoes. Or something.
Play our useless games
(Amusement Potential: how long have you got?)
Waste away the hours with our collection of useless games
Make prank phone calls
(Amusement Potential: 20-60 minutes)
Very entertaining, but requires discipline. Remember - vulgarities don't make a call funny, but getting the other person to believe a ridiculous story will. Try seeing if you can get them to make noises to 'test' the line. One to get you started off: Call McDonalds with weird complaints about their food.
Pretend all humans will die except for people in room with you
Amusement Potential: 10-20 minutes)
what would you do if this really happened? Would the group stay together, or would there be factions? Who would join what group? Remember, there would only be power for a few days before the plants ran out of fuel or broke. To travel, you would always have to be near cars to siphon gas out of. Best to do with people you know.
Step off a curb with eyes shut, imagine it's a cliff
(Amusement Potential: 2-5 minutes)
to get any benefit out of this one, you have to have a good imagination. Don't step off immediately, build up to the jump. Study the ravine below. Feel the winds at that altitude. Step off and...AHHHHHH!
Try and sound Welsh
(Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes)
The key to sounding Welsh is to make sure that your voice goes up at the end of the sentence, so that everything sounds like a question. Throw in a superfluous 'isn't it?' at the end of everything you say and you're halfway there. Isn't it?
Burn things with a magnifying glass
(Amusement Potential: 5-30 minutes)
Ants are always fun to use for this, but burning the face of someone you don't like, under some circumstances, can be just as entertaining."
Said Ian in one breath. Kai and Ian stared at one another before shrugging and getting off the grassy hillside floor. Kai grabbed his bag and slung it over his shoulder and his lab top as Ian hung from his shoulder.
"What do you think is in Granger's garbage?" asked Kai as they slowly wandered to the Dojo on foot rather than riding Kai's motorcycle.
"Porn?" suggested Ian as they went around back and took the lid off the trash cans.
"Um… Kai?" Ian whimpered as Kai paled.
"Yes Ian?" Said Kai as he stared at the contents of the trash can.
"I'm starting to think this was a bad idea." Kai was about to nod when the trash can rattled ominously. They turned tail and ran. They passed Max, Ray, Bryan, and Tala arguing on the way. The four stopped to stare as Kai and Ian ran as fast as they could without tripping on the way.
"Was that?" Started Max.
"Yes." Answered Ray as Kai and Ian turned the corner.
"What's next?" Panted Ian as Kai took the lab top and scrolled down.
" Watch TV, repeat everything said in Italian accent
(Amusement Potential: 5-10 minutes)
Sort of entertaining. Include flamboyant shoulder shrugs for added impact, or go for a Marlon Brando set of grunts." Kai read and turned to Ian who stood up on tip toes to peek through the window to see the TV playing and no one watching it.
"Sure." They climbed in through the window and left their shoes there before sitting on the couch and staring at the TV a little insecurely.
"Maybe we should skip this one." Said Kai nervously as he rubbed his wrists making Ian remember the day Kai was punished for watching TV by Voltaire.
"The next one is: Send spooky emails
(Amusement Potential: 15-60 minutes)
Look up someone's CV on the web, do some research on them via Google and then send them an email full of personal references claiming to be an ex-work colleague who fell in love with their shoes. Or something." Ian stared at Kai with wide eyes and shook his head.
"I'll take a look then." Ian took the lab top and scrolled down.
"Play our useless games
(Amusement Potential: how long have you got?)
Waste away the hours with our collection of useless games?" they shook their heads and Ian scrolled down once more.
"Make prank phone calls
(Amusement Potential: 20-60 minutes)
Very entertaining, but requires discipline. Remember - vulgarities don't make a call funny, but getting the other person to believe a ridiculous story will. Try seeing if you can get them to make noises to 'test' the line. One to get you started off: Call McDonalds with weird complaints about their food." Kai smiled faintly at the look of mischief in Ian's eyes. Kai grabbed his cell phone from his bag and dialed Tala's phone number.
"Hello? I'm kind of busy." Said Tala's irritated voice as he answered on the first ring.
"Hello? I'm kind of busy." Answered Kai in the exact same tone with the same voice as Tala reminding Ian of Kai's perfection in mimicry.
"Who is this?" shouted Tala angrily as Ian held in a giggle.
"Who is this?" shouted Kai angrily exactly like Tala again.
"I WILL FIND YOU!"
"I WILL FIND YOU!" Kai copied before hanging up as Tala took another breath. Ian laughed uncontrollably for a few minutes and Kai joined him on the floor. They heard Tala stomp inside and shot off the floor out the window with their shoes on their feet and scurried up the roof.
"Do Bryan next!" whispered Ian excitedly. Kai nodded and dialed Bryan's number.
"This is my phone. Tala, Ian, Spencer, Kai if you're calling leave a message I'll get back to you. Anyone else you will be hunted down." Kai hung up and sighed.
"Guess we'll call Spencer." He dialed the blonde's number and waited.
"Hn." Kai and Ian smirked and then Kai changed the pitch of his voice.
"I love you Spencer!" the line cut and Ian almost rolled off the roof in laughter. Kai shook with suppressed laughter as Tala stormed outside in anger. Fury rolled off him in waves.
"All the other ones sound stupid. Wait this one sounds well.
Pretend all humans will die except for people in room with you
Amusement Potential: 10-20 minutes)
what would you do if this really happened? Would the group stay together, or would there be factions? Who would join what group? Remember, there would only be power for a few days before the plants ran out of fuel or broke. To travel, you would always have to be near cars to siphon gas out of. Best to do with people you know." Ian and Kai glanced at one another for a few minutes before Kai shut off the lab top and put it in his bag along with his cell phone.
"It was nice knowing you Ian. I'm going to go crazy and by junk food and you?" Ian looked nervous before smiling in determination.
"I will live through the end of the world. I'll go by some too, and then I'll leave you behind. I will be ruler of the world when it ends." Kai grinned sadistically.
"Not with me still alive." Kai jumped off the roof startling Tala, Bryan, Max and Ray. Ian jumped off next startling them again.
"What was that all about?" asked Max as Kai and Ian ran separate ways like the devil was after them.
Kai and Ian made it back to the dojo in record time with lots of supplies. Kai took control of the roof and Ian stole the living room to make it his command center. Tala and Bryan stared at Ian cautiously as he set up his base of operations in their way. Max and Ray who earlier that day were arguing with Tala and Bryan on who had the right to watch the television were also there as they had lost the battle of wills against Tala and Bryan who were watching Russian channels as opposed to the cartoons Max and Ray wanted to watch.
"Um… Ian what are you doing?" asked Bryan as Ian finished his fortress of solitude made of pillows and was watching everyone through binoculars.
"Setting up base for the end of the world." He answered just as Kai hanging upside down from the roof threw rocks at Ian's base before swinging his self back up and dodging the rocks thrown back at him.
"You'll never beat me!" screamed Ian and Kai swung back down and stuck his tongue out at Ian. Ian stared at Kai in shock as he hung upside with such a childish expression. Tyson, Spencer, Brooklyn and Hiro walked in to see Kai's face just before he swung back up as Ian threw a potato at him.
"Sucker! You gave up food!" Kai laughed as Ian cursed violently in Russian startling Spencer.
"Ian language!" Ian shot out of his fortress in shock and Kai fell off the roof in surprise.
"OW." Kai whined as he rubbed his neck and sat up.
"Ian there are more survivors." Kai deadpanned and Ian nodded before the excitement of the end of the world ended. He hopped out the window just as Kai made to jump back onto the roof.
"Look for more!" Kai watched Ian for a half a minute before sighing.
"Fine, there's also this one." Kai clicked on a page and grabbed Ian just as he spotted the others watching them from the window. He hopped onto the roof to avoid there eyes and their ears if possible.
"THINGS YOU CAN DO WITH ABSOLUTELY NOTHING
Blink wildly and then close your eyes really tight for an interesting light show
(Amusement Potential: 1-5 minutes)
See a variety of blobs, stars and flashes. Try to make out shapes and see if your subconscious is trying to send you a message (perhaps that funny shape is saying, 'send all your money to '?)
See how long you can hold a note
(Amusement Potential: 4-20 minutes)
Not that much fun, but it sure passes the time. Play with a friend, or try to beat your own personal best. Inhale deeply and then try and make a noise for as long as you can. Earn extra points for making your partner laugh or ending on an amusing note.
Try to not think about penguins
(Amusement Potential: 1-5 minutes)
this is especially hard, because by trying too much, you remember what you were trying to avoid thinking of. If you try too little, you end up thinking about penguins anyway.
Use your secret mind power
(Amusement Potential: 5-10 minutes)
Pick a passing by and try to use your mind power to command them do something, like drop their bag or knock into someone. The law of averages dictates that sooner or later one of your mind commands will come true, so you can convince yourself that you really have super human powers and waste even more time trying them out.
Pretend you're a robot
(Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes)
Walk down the street with mechanical movements, adding 'zzzzzt' sounds with each motion. Pretending to have a motor broken in, say, your left hand can add at least 30 seconds more entertainment.
Scratch yourself
(Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes)
Go ahead, scratch yourself now. Even if nothing itches, go ahead. Doesn't that feel pretty good?
Rate passers by
(Amusement Potential: 10-15 minutes)
Secretly award passers by marks out of ten as you go along, offering (unsaid) expert criticism over their clothing, hairstyle and footwear choices.
Repeat the same word over and over until it loses its meaning
(Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes)
Pick a random word out of a magazine and say it aloud to yourself until it becomes a meaningless set of noises.
Pinch yourself
(Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes)
what is pain? Why is it unpleasant? There's nothing physical about it - it's all in your mind. Plus, after pinching yourself for awhile, boredom will seem nice next to being in pain.
Try to swallow your tongue
(Amusement Potential: 1-2 minutes)
There's not much to say about this one. It is possible, but really stupid.
Pretend to be a car
(Amusement Potential: 5-10 minutes)
Make appropriate revving noises in your head as you walk along and add a racing commentary as you pass strangers in the street. Use blinking eyes as indicators for extra authenticity.
Make Star Trek door noises
(Amusement Potential: 1-2 minutes)
Stand by an electric door to a bank or something and make that silly "Scccccccchwop" sound heard whenever people popped on to the bridge to hang with Captain Kirk.
Look at something for awhile, shut eyes, study after image
(Amusement Potential: 2-5 minutes)
another great time waster. It takes about 30 seconds of staring to create an after image, and the image is then viewable for about the same length of time. Fun to combine this one with pushing on your eyes.
Get yourself as nauseated as possible
(Amusement Potential: 5-10 minutes)
Best achieved by looking straight up and spinning around. Try to be so dizzy you can't even stand up. This is also entertaining due to the "makes boredom seem a lot better" effect (see "Hurt Yourself").
Invent a weird twitch
(Amusement Potential: 5-10 minutes)
Adopt a bizarre twitch (e.g. flicking your head irregularly, twitching with eye or busting out sporadic cough noises) and try it out when you go shopping.
Make a low buzzing noise
(Amusement Potential: 15-30 minutes)
Hours of fun in libraries! Keeping a totally straight face and looking nonchalant, make a low pitch humming/buzzing noise and see that react."
Kai and Ian looked at the sky and then down at the dirt floor.
"Well maybe we should do it backwards this time." Suggested Kai as he stared at the list absently.
"Yeah." Said Ian as he lay down with his arms pillowing his head. Kai joined him and then they began to buzz just as Tala stuck his head up to see them. Tala's eyebrow steadily rose up before he slowly vanished from sight. Ian continued buzzing lazily as Kai snickered quietly. He then resumed buzzing as Spencer popped up and stared down at them for a few minutes.
"Are you two alright?" he asked warily. The two of them nodded and then Ian's eyebrow began to twitch. Kai's eyes widened subtly and he twitched his fingers every three to five seconds. Spencer nodded and got off the roof just as the two burst in loud wild laughter.
"Did Kai just…?" Tala looked up to the roof where Kai was laughing freely with Ian. Tears glistened in Tala's eyes as he shook.
"He's laughing. I thought I would never hear him laugh." He sobbed shocking Tyson and Ray. Hiro and Max who were more empathetic than the other two knew the cold, hard ass bladers that were the Blitzkrieg boys was just a mask.
"But why is he laughing?" asked Bryan with childish curiosity.
"Use your secret mind power
(Amusement Potential: 5-10 minutes)
Pick a passing by and try to use your mind power to command them do something, like drop their bag or knock into someone. The law of averages dictates that sooner or later one of your mind commands will come true, so you can convince yourself that you really have super human powers and waste even more time trying them out." said Kai as he and Ian peeked over the edge of the roof to stare intently at G rev, the rest of Blitzkrieg, Bega five, and the Barthez Battalion. They stared with such intensity that everyone began to sweat and freak out. Matilda and Claude turned away. Then Ian laughed while Kai handed over some money to Ian. They began to stare again and Tyson took off his hat and Ian grumbled before handing the money back to Kai who smirked smugly.
"What are you two doing?" asked Spencer when Ian handed Kai some more money as Miguel tugged at his white vest nervously.
"Using our secret mind power." Responded Ian promptly before vanishing from sight as Kai followed him at a much slower pace.
"What next?" they heard Ian say and then they heard Kai answer him quietly.
"Repeat the same word over and over until it loses its meaning
(Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes)
Pick a random word out of a magazine and say it aloud to yourself until it becomes a meaningless set of noises." Then there was silence for a few minutes.
"Obey? Water? Beyblade? Cat? Dog? Bones!" one of them exclaimed.
"Bones, bones, bones, bones, bones, bones, bones, bones, bones, bones, bones, bones, bones, bones, bones, bones…" the two trailed off as it became nonsense words instead of bones.
"What exactly are those two doing?" murmured Spencer softly as he stared at Tala who was standing on Bryan's shoulders to try to listen to Kai and Ian's conversations.
"Something about next on the list." Tala answered the unspoken question in Bryan's eyes. Max smiled and took a deep breath.
"KAI! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" he shouted startling Tala and Bryan who both fell into a heap.
Kai poked his head over the side of the roof and stared Max right in the eyes. Kai's eyes softened almost imperceptibly and he hopped off the roof lab top in hands.
"Things to do when you're bored." Stated Ka simply as Max stared at the screen in amusement.
"End of the world huh?" he asked and Kai smiled softly before the smile fell and he smirked at Ian.
"I won." Ian grumbled and threw a potato at Kai who chuckled and lifted an eyebrow at Ian mockingly.
"That means nothing!" he hissed as Max looked at the potato at his feet.
"Right. Well can I join?" he asked and Kai blinked his answer just as Ian threw his self off the roof at Kai. Kai stepped forward so that Ian over shot him and landed on Tala and Bryan.
"OW." There was mirth n Spencer's eyes as he glanced at the dog pile and then Kai who had a mischievous look in his eyes.
"DOGPILE!" he shouted as he jumped on Ian and Max jumped onto Kai's back making Bryan gasp for breath.
Yup just another day in the life of the Blitzkrieg boys.
