Thank you to my beta, MrsBates93
I slammed the door shut, throwing my keys across the hallway. I walked through the living room and into the kitchen, deliberately knocking over a lamp as I passed it.
I opened the cupboard with such force that it bounced on its hinges. Taking a glass out, I poured a shot of whisky and downed it in two gulps. I leaned against the counter, staring at the bottle but not really seeing it. I knew that drinking wouldn't help, that it wouldn't make everything better, but seeing the bottle, I didn't care.
There were so many things I wanted to do. I wanted to yell and scream and cry. I wanted to punch something, break something. I wanted the pain to go away and I wanted to forget.
Because my brother was dead.
We'd been close once, but that bond had been severed during our years at Hogwarts. Regulus was one of the few family members who I didn't truly despise. We had argued and fought like brothers do and at times I had hated him for being the favourite, the prodigal son. Everything Regulus wanted, he got.
But even though I had said I hated him, even going as far as punching him when I found out he intended to join the Death Eaters and follow Voldemort like a lost puppy. Despite everything that had happened, he was still my brother. The close bond that we had shared prior to Hogwarts may have been destroyed, reduced to nothing but a bitter resentment between the two of us, but I still loved him and wanted to protect him.
Only I had failed. I had failed to protect him from becoming a Death Eater. I had failed to protect him from my crazy parents and their warped beliefs.
But most of all, I had failed in my role as a big brother.
That thought released the tears I had been holding back. I grabbed the whisky bottle as my knees hit the floor. I drank in large gulps, choking on the liquid. I emptied the bottle and threw it to the side.
I could still think and feel.
I reached for another two bottles of whisky and slumped against the cupboards, drinking until my thoughts were blurred and I could feel nothing.
Because that was what I had done. Nothing.
My brother's death was entirely my fault.