Sweeney the Unicorn
The boat was very uncomfortable. Especially with Anthony singing about bloody London all the time. God, did that boy ever shut up?
Suddenly, Sweeney was awakened by a rather annoying sailor who he was just imagining drowning in a surprisingly hot vat of oil.
"Hey, Charlie! Hey Charlie wake up!"
"Oh, it's you again. This better be pretty freaking important, is the boat on fire?"
"No, Charlie! It's London! It's just over this bridge Charlie! This magical bridge of hope and wonder. Hey! Hope, like me! Yay!"
"For the last time, Anthony, my name is not Charlie!"
"Then why does it say Charlie on your jacket?"
"Ummmm, Anthony, it doesn't say Charlie. In fact it doesn't say anything. That's just a bunch of scratch marks. Can you, like, not read or something?"
"Listen, Charlie, I went to the sea so I didn't have to learn how to read. Oh, and so I could met the infamous immortal Captain Jack Sparrow."
"Sparrow, ya say. Ya know my wife liked sparrows. Oh yes, Lucy…..
While Anthony was blabbering on about how cool Captain Jack Sparrow was, Sweeney went to a nice place called Memory Lane…..
Benjamin Barker and is blonde nit of a wife were in a flower market. Suddenly, Lucy spies a sparrow. "Oh! Look Johanna! A sparrow! Yay sparrows!" She tosses Johanna up in the air and madly chases after the fleeing bird.
Luckily, Ben catches the baby just in time. "Oh, Lucy. Always running after random birds. It's like you don't love me at all."
We see Ben chuckling to himself as we close-up on the judge and the beadle. "Now's our chance, Wormtail. Time to get Harry Potter back for bothering me. Him and that stupid red-head friend of his."
"Right, Snape. Wait a second. That's not Harry. And this isn't Howarts. I think we wandered into the wrong movie."
"Really? Oh, well. This punk'll do. Look, he has a hot stupid wife! It's like Christmas! Get him Wormtail.
"Right Snape, anything you say."
All of a sudden, Ben is attacked by Draco Malfoy, Crab, and Goyle.
"It's payback time, Harry!"
"Who's Harry? Wait, where are you guys taking me? Help! Lucy!"
We see Lucy, totally consumed by a worm on the side walk. She is holding Johanna by an arm and the rest of her dangling like a rag doll.
End Flashback
"Charlie? Charrrrrrrrrrliiiiiiiieeeeee? Charrrrrrrrrrrr-"
"Alright, alright. What do you want?"
"Time to get off the boat Charlie!"
Walking down the docks Anthony turns to Sweeney and totally blocks his escape.
"I hope to see you again someday, friend."
"Yeah, me too."
"Where will I be able to find you?"
"Ummm….I'll be living in Hyde Park, so go find me there. Bye!
Sweeney ran crazily through the streets, flailing his arms like, well, Captain Jack Sparrow, trying to get away from his stalker.
Anthony is left all alone. "A map," he mumbles to himself. "I need a map. I need a map, and a GPS system. Oh wait. They don't have those here, do they? Hmmmmmmm……"
Sweeney finally stops running, and leans on the side of a wall. "Stupid….bloody….London," he says between gasps.
When he finally has air, he walks down the streets, until he sees a familiar building.
"Mrs. Lovett's Pie Shoppe," he reads to himself.