Hey, look, it's me, the asshole of epic proportions! You see... I wrote All Hail The Vampire King, read it, slapped myself several times for writing something so stupid, deleted it, and that rotted my brain with some Bubbline. Gotta go seeyoubye~!
Disclaimer: I don't own Adventure Time. If I did, you would know.
I still remember, she was like a princess
Straight from a dreamy casle in the air
So lovely,
She was everything to me
~Super Honeymoon by Owl City
Bonnibel's a candy princess. Marceline is not cute. She's a demon. A punk. A hazard. All of the above. She cares more about her bass than life, for crying out lumping loud!
At least, that's what she thought when she first met her.
As she spends more time with the vampire queen, she's starting to think a lot differently. Maybe she's not so bad after all.
The princess remembers the first time she went to Marceline's house. Glob knows why she accepted her offer to visit, but she did. She was with Finn, Jake, Lady, LSP, Tree Trunks, and the newest addition to their posse, Flame Princess. It was movie night, but the tree house was in really bad shape after an attack from an ogre. Marceline offered to host movie night at her house until the tree house was fixed. Princess Bubblegum offered to have it in the Candy Kingdom, but everyone wanted to go to Marceline's. Everyone but Bubblegum and Lady. What was so great, so lumping great, about her house that even LSP wanted to go?
Maybe Bubblegum was just expecting a dark cave, filled with skeletons and stolen treasures that littered the dusty, blood soaked floor. Maybe there were bats, lots of bats. Maybe demons or ghouls, begging for your soul, all housed by this witch of a woman.
Whatever happened, Bubblegum was not expecting a cute little pink-and-purple cottage. The soft, squishy, light blue carpet and pink walls were not something to be expected, either. But that's what was there, that was going to be the location of movie night till future notice. Honestly, Bubblegum was fine with that idea.
When she and Lady arrived, everyone else was already there. They stood in the living room, chatting, sipping milkshakes and laughing. "Hey, Peebles' here!" Finn shouted upon noticing her arrival. He was standing a little to close to that Flame Princess girl for her comfort. Sure, Bubblegum was glad Finn finally found someone else to crush on, but seriously, did he have to choose someone crazy? Bubblegum just greeted them all with a small wave.
"Hey, are you two down with strawberry shakes? It's kinda all I have. Sorry," Marceline asked. "Uh, sure," Bubblegum responded, accompanied by Lady nodding. Marceline gave a thumbs-up and disappeared in to what must have been the kitchen.
"Jake and I found this movie called Howl's Moving Castle, and it's radical. I figured we could watch that tonight," Finn stated. "There's lots of fight stuff and explosions and magic and-"
"Sappy, gooey romance," Flame Princess interrupted, a tone of disdain entering her voice. "Uhh, yeah," Finn stuttered, blushing a little. "Hey, dude, I bet you wish that you were Howl and Fl-" Jake started, teasing. "Shut up!" Finn cut him off, blushing more so that just about his entire face was redder than a tomato.
"I'ma back, peepsies!" Marceline exclaimed, toting two strawberry milkshakes and handing them to Bubblegum and Lady. She poked Finn's cheek. "Dear Glob, what did I miss? Whatever, you might wanna get your amazing technicolor face under control before I get hungry," she joked, her eyes turning from their normal blue to bloodred, grinning and showing her fangs. Everyone else laughs.
Bubblegum, however, jumps a little. How could anyone take a joke like that? A joke about blood and death and vampirism...yuck. "Why don't we just put the movie in?" she asked sharply. "Okay, okay, fine. Everyone, take a seat on the sexy-tastic brand new couch over there. You're welcome," Marceline caught the DVD case that Finn tossed to her and it opened with a click under her slender fingers. She put it in the ancient-looking DVD player. How did she even get her hands on something like that? They stopped making those after the War.
Anyway, the couch is red, large enough to seat the entire movie club and, oh- exceedingly comfortable, Bubblegum noted as she sat down. Jake and Lady sat on the floor together, anyway, and Tree Trunks also was a floor person. LSP wasn't really sitting, anyway, she was actually floating. So, technically it was only Finn, Flame Princess and our person of the hour, Princess Bubblegum on that insanely large couch. Where does one even find a couch that big?
The movie started out in a cute European village and Marceline sat herself down right next to the Bubblegum, who used all her restraint to not jump five feet in the air. Surprisingly, Marceline did not smell like death and decay. She actually smelled like strawberries. Maybe that was all she ate, Bubblegum thought, noticing how bony she was. Didn't vampires drink blood? Oh, wait- she was some kind of weird vegetarian-ish thingy (or, at least, the closest thing that a vampire could be to vegetarian). Bubblegum tried not to focus on the undead creature dangerously close to her.
At this point, a cute little poodle walked up to Marceline and started pawing at her legs. She picked it up and cradled it in her arms, smiling as it licked at her face. WHOA. A pretty, fluffy, toy poodle? Bubblegum knew that Marceline had a dog, but she was expecting a pit bull or something big and menacing. Not some white, bouncing fluffball.
So. Let's get this straight. She's a pissed-off, overly-emotional, tough-girl vampire queen that lives in a cozy purple cottage, doesn't drink blood and has a pet toy poodle?
What. Is. Wrong. With. This. Woman?
That movie night actually went pretty smoothly. Everyone got along well and enjoyed the movie. The same happened at the next movie club, and the next, and by then Finn and Jake's treehouse was fixed up and the started having movie club there again.
Princess Bubblegum really enjoyed it at Marceline's house, though. By that point in time, she had established it in her mind that Marceline was no monster that wasn't going to snap and kill anyone any time soon.
But, let's move to another story. The first night she spent with Marceline. No, get your minds out of the gutter, THAT comes later. This was just a normal sleepover between two friends. This was a year after that first movie night, and Bubblegum had started to notice a little crush on her newfound friend. It was nothing major, though, and she just pushed all the thoughts of how lovely Marceline looks, what a beautiful shade of blue or yellow or whatever color her eyes were at the moment was, or how adorable her laugh was.
"So, what's going on with Finn and Flame Princess, anyway?" she sighed. "Oh, those kids? Friends with benefits, definitely," Marceline answered. "Dude, no they're not! They're both only 14!" Bubblegum exclaimed. "Age is but a number!" Marceline chided. "Yeah, but there's definitely no sexuality going on there. I bet Finn doesn't even know what boobs are. He was raised by a bunch of dogs, right?" Bubblegum combated.
"Oh, trust me, he knows a lot more than you think he knows."
"No way. He's oblivious."
"HE'S SEEN ME NAKED, WOMAN."
"You didn't...did you?"
"No, it was an accident. But, still, I bet he jacks off to pictures of her, at least."
"Marceline! I swear, sometimes you can be the most vulgar person I've ever met!" Bubblegum huffed, starting to get uncomfortable with the turn of the conversation. Marceline laughed. And laughed. "How else do you think I have any fun?"
Seven months after that, the two were officially dating. Marceline was actually the one to admit she had feelings for the princess who had thought she was the only one to feel that way.
It was eleven P.M. on the dot and Bubblegum was just crawling in to bed when she heard a tap on the glass door that lead out to her balcony. She looked up to see two blue eyes staring at her out of the darkness. She'd recognize those eyes anywhere. You see, over the past few years, Bubblegum's thoughts of Marceline had just grown stronger and stronger until she had fully admitted to herself that she was in love.
Bubblegum slid the glass door open and Marceline limped in. She was not floating for once, and Bubblegum noticed that they were about the same height. "What's wrong?" she asked. "Uh, yeah, those guards of yours gave me a good swat with those rock candy sticks or whatever the hell they are," Marceline explained, pain thinly veiled behind her words. She started floating again and let out a small sigh of relief.
"Are you okay?"
"Just peachy."
Bubblegum prodded Marceline's shin and she jumped and pulled it away. "You're lying," Bubblegum remarked. "I'm FINE, really," she insisted. "No, you're not. Come on, we need to wrap that up or something." Marceline scoffed, or maybe she growled, as Bubblegum grabbed her by the wrist and dragged her in your bathroom. "Seriously, dude, I'm fine. More than fine. Great," she carried on. Bubblegum ignored her and rolled up the leg of her jeans.
"If you're fine, then why is it swollen, huh?" Bubblegum grabbed a bandage from a drawer behind her and started wrapping Marceline's leg up. "So, what were you doing here so late that you could get in trouble with the candy guards?" she asked.
"Well...uh...I just wanted to tell you that I...think you're pretty rad..." Marceline trailed off, a blush starting to creep across her face. "That's very nice of you, but honestly, was it worth all that trouble?" Bubblegum questioned. It would have been easier to read the expression in Marceline's eyes if she would have stopped looking away.
"No...I guess it wasn't..." she sighed. That tone...she wasn't telling the truth. There was something wrong. "What's going on?" Bubblegum softly asked. "Nothing," Marceline mumbled. "Tell. Me," Bubblegum insisted, brushing away a lock of soft black hair that hung in her face. Their eyes met and suddenly Marceline opened her mouth and words started spilling out.
"Okay, look, I think you're really cool and I don't always give you credit for it and you always look great and you're super nice and- oh glob, who am I kidding? I'm in love with you and pleasedon'tthinkI'mafreak-!" she said, squeezing her eyes shut, gritting her teeth and clamping her hands over her ears.
Bubblegum felt her face get hot and her heart do something really strange that it'd never done to her before. It started throwing itself against her ribcage, making an almost audible sound, not showing any sign of stopping. Marceline...she felt the same?
Calmly reaching out to pry Marceline's hands from her ears, Bubblegum asked, "Why didn't you say so sooner?" Marceline looked at her through her long black locks, wanting more than anything to just look away and, god no, not fall in love again. She was such a baby about romance...she always turned soft and mushy and felt like she was flying all the time, even when she was on solid ground. "I didn't...I couldn't...you..." she struggled. Bubblegum leaned forward and kissed Marceline on the cheek. "You have no idea...no freaking idea," Bubblegum sighed. "I've wanted to say that for so long."
Marceline bit her lip, no, don't make eye contact. She couldn't look at those adorable pink eyes, and oh glob, she was wearing the shirt. "I-..." Marceline trailed off, unable to speak. She was pretty sure that if her heart was beating, it'd be just about ready to explode.
"No...I can't...I shouldn't love you. You're going to get old, and old people die, and vampires don't..." she started off, unable to say much.
"Come on, Marcie. Can't we give it a try?"
And so they did.
Anticipate an Invader Zim/SuperJail! crossover that I'm taking my own sweet time on and I'm not even an eighth done with yet. Yeah. I know this sucked, but could I please get a review or two? Bye.