DALEK SHORE
Doctor Who Companion
Series, Pilot Episode
Outline
by
Rob Best
Intro - Random Jersey Shore Graphic stuff in background- Theme Music - Continuous
(in later episodes this is where we will show the "Previously on Dalek Shore" segment)
We see the characters of the show with their names appearing on the screen very similar to Jersey Shore…
Dalek Sec
Dalek Caan
Staci (hot chick in bikini)
Dalek They
Brianna (hot chick in bikini)
Dalek Jast…
Special Guest Star: Christopher Eccleston
Dalek Shore Logo appears
Ext: Dalek Shore Party House - Sunny Day… music fades…
Title Card Reads: Bad Wolf Bay, New Jersey
Title Card Reads: Dalek Shore Party House: Day One
Int: Dalek House Living Room- continuous
Fade In:
Dalek Sec, a fresh optimistic and murderous young Dalek materializes with his three comrades in the living room of their new beach house. There is a pool table and an aquarium (the entire house is furnished by IKEA). All four start driving randomly and yelling "Emergency, Emergency!" "New Beach House Detected!" There is a Fez on the ground (obviously).
Music begins to play in the background.
Dalek Sec (who is the Alpha of the group) looks around and says "The Beach House must be protected at all costs!… Dalek Jast… inspect the refrigerator". "I obey" Dalek Jast responds. "Dalek Can and Dalek They… you will inspect the Party Deck". "I obey" they both remark out of sequence. Dalek Caan and Dalek They inspect the party deck. There is a hot tub and a big ass bed. "Prepare to be annihilated!" Dalek Caan remarks as he looks down upon the scantily clad college student party people who are walking on the boardwalk in front of the beach house.
"We must now select our sleeping chambers!" Dalek Sec announces very abruptly.
INT. One Of The Bedrooms - Continuous
Dalek They and Dalek Caan are rolling around inside one of he rooms with their heads swiveling. "This sleeping chamber shall be sufficient". "NEGATIVE!… These is my sleeping chamber!" They bicker over the room and the argument quickly develops. "Exterminate!" one of them screams and they begin shooting lasers at each other and soon they have destroyed everything in the room and everything is on fire.
INT. Kitchen
Dalek Jast is wondering around wearing an apron (he is the domestic one).
Fade In:
INT. Dalek Secs Bedroom - Continuous
Dalek Sec is rolling around with his head swiveling slightly. He somehow opens the closet and he moves backwards quickly and his lights intensify. "Emergency!.. Identify yourself… you will Identify!"
Fade In:
EXT. Boardwalk - Sunny Daylight
Daleks Caan, They and Jast are rolling through a crowd of hot girls in bikinis and college dudes. They are handing out fliers that are attached to their laser cannons. The are yelling orders. "You will attend our keg party!" "You Will attend!" "There will be social interaction!" "Chicks drink for free!" "There will be a band!" "There will be round things!" "What are the round things?" "I have no idea!"
INT. Confession Chamber
Staci is twirling her hair and says "Dalek Caan is like totally the hottest guy in the house… his accent is so cute, I think he is Austrailian…"
EXT. Boardwalk - Sunny Daylight
Dalek Caan abruptly shouts "Seek… Locate… Destroy!" and begins killing people with his laser cannon, his fellow Daleks also begin killing, the victims light up and their skeletons turn blue, like they normally would when being shot by a Dalek, and there is blood and guts flying everywhere. Note: The deaths on this show will be like the ones on Doctor Who, except that there will be a gratuitous about of blood and guts and flying meat and brains and stuff.
INT. Confession Chamber
Staci continues "I think we have a real connection you know? Like we are totally going to hook up…"
Fade In:
INT. Dalek Secs Bedroom - Continuous
Dalek Sec, brimming with confidence has found himself, with laser cannon fully armed, and his lights at their utmost intense, in a face to face showdown with a small kitten. The kitten looks at Dalek Sec and thinks to itself "this is not food". "You will IDENTIFY!" Sec demands. The kitten meows at him.
Fade In:
Int: Dalek House Living Room- continuous
Daleks They, Caan and Jast enter and look around with their heads swiveling. They notices a woman with red hair setting up a microphone stand. He approaches her. "You will identify yourself!" he demands. " I am Kate Pierson… I am with the band" she states. Note: it doesn't have to be Kate Pierson, it can be anybody, but the point is this is the part of the story where we put the musical guest… think about that time Motorhead were on The Young Ones, it is like that.
There is an Ood in the corner of the room and he has a table set up with turntables on it and he is the DJ. He starts playing house music and the crowd starts coming in. Dalek Sec comes in and commands "Prepare the keg!". "I obey" Dalek Jast says as he rolls a keg of beer that looks like a Dalek into the room.
The room is full of party guests at this point. Lots of hot college girls in bikinis, shirtless dudes, a Weeping Angel, a Vonvocci and a Zygon.
Kate Pierson's band plays their latest hit single. During the song Dalek Sec says abruptly "What are these noises? You will explain!" At another point in the song Dalek Sec is dangling some string for the cat and the cat s playing with it. While the band is playing the Tardis appears in the middle of the party. Christopher Eccleson emerges from it waving his screwdriver at the crowd. He looks slyly around the room and walks over to the keg and steals a beer… he slowly gets back into the Tardis and it disappears. (Television audience applause) This concludes the celebrity cameo part of the episode. Each week someone from the Doctor Who Universe will have a quick non speaking role that will mostly involve appearing in the Tardis and stealing beer during the musical guest segment. After the musical guests song… while she is smiling and everyone cheers the Daleks yell "Exterminate" and shoot the band with their laser cannons and the band explodes and blood and guts fly everywhere. No one seems to notice.
INT. Confession Chamber
Dalek They is speaking to the camera. "Staci is a mentally inferior human… she will be my girlfriend!"
INT. Kitchen
House music continues in the background as Dalek Sec is talking to his new kitten that is sitting on the counter next to a Macbook Pro (one of the ones with the big screen) enjoying a bowl of milk. "WHO IS A GOOD KITTY!" "YOU ARE!" "YES YOU ARE!" he yells in a very loud cold blooded deadly tone. Briana sees this and starts checking him out.
Int: Dalek House Living Room
House music still playing in the background. Staci leads Dalek Caan and Dalek They into the Smush Chamber which is a room on the far wall of the living room behind a partition. There is spray paint on the wall with an arrow that simply says "Smush Chamber" at the entrance. This is a room equipped with infrared cameras. You can not see them because they are behind the partition. Staci starts making sex noises and it is clear that they are having a three way. "The human females heart rate is increasing!" Dalek They remarks. "We are under attack!" Dalek Caan yells. They both start yelling "Exterminate!" and their laser cannons go off several times. Blood and brains and guts explode from behind the partition (think Evil Dead 2).
Dalek Sec is walking toward the front door with Briana lovingly at his side holding the kitten. A Cyberman walks through the door. "Identify yourself!" Sec demands. "I am a friend of Dave's… he is friends with a guy that lives here… he said it was cool…". The other Daleks move toward the door. "Does anyone know a Dave?… Report!" Dalek Sec asks. "Dave does not compute… there is no Dave in our database!" Dalek Jast says. "Emergency Emergency Party Crasher Party Crasher!" Dalek Caan shouts. All of the Daleks begin screaming "Emergency, Emergency, Intruder, Exterminate, Exterminate!" The Cyberman starts yelling "Delete, Delete" and a large laser cannon battle ensues resulting in the Cyberman exploding, all of the party guests exploding, lots and lots of blood, guts, brains, meat, smoke, fire and so on. The only survivors are the Daleks, Briana and the cat.
The smoke begins to clear over the the blood soaked carnage. The Daleks and Brianna are standing there with their heads swiveling around. The cat does not seem to care. After a moment Dalek They starts to exclaim "Emergency Emergency… incoming FaceTime Message from The Prime Minister of The Daleks!"
The Prime Minister of the Daleks appears on the Macbook Pro screen. Note: For all of the scenes involving FaceTime calls from the Prime Minister, footage from The Doctor Who Episode "Asylum of the Daleks" will be used/ recycled as the images on the computer screen.
"Dalek Sec you will report your progress!" The Prime Minister commands. Dalek Sec pauses and looks around at all of the blood and smoldering corpses. "Everything is fine…. how are you?" Dalek Sec responds. There is an uncomfortable silence as the Prime Minister looks at Sec, and Sec looks back at him. Dalek Jast shuts the computer. "I hate that guy" Dalek Caan remarks. "He is a dildo!" Dalek Sec yells.
Fade Out:
Cheesy American Accent Voice over and Title Card Reads: Next Time On Dalek Shore:
Quick Scenes of Dalek Sec playing beach volleyball with lots of bikini girls, Dalek Caan surfing, a great white shark, a great white shark with a Dalek eye sticking out of it's head, a person in a shark suit with a Dalek eye dancing at a party in the living room.
Cheesy American Accent Voice over and Title Card Reads: Musical Guests Daft Punk and Special Guest Star John Barrowman.