I am no longer the Girl on Fire.
I am no longer the Mockingjay.
I have burned, and arisen again.
I am a Phoenix, and I am alive.
I don't know what my life will be now.
I just know that whatever happens, I will survive.
I needed help to get through the flames, both physical and metaphorical. The medical team in the Capitol got me through the physical flames. That was the easy part.
The mental part was harder. It took Haymitch and Dr. Aurelius to care for my mental wounds. It took Annie and Johanna, by their example, even if not their actual intervention. It took Greasy Sae to feed my body and keep me alive. And most of all, it took Peeta and his love and generosity and kindness.
I don't need them anymore. My life is richer with them in it, and I choose to keep them there. I can even choose to include more. Such as my mother. Such others who have settled in District 12.
Most of all, I no longer need Peeta to survive. I choose, with all I have in me, to have him in my life. With this, I can free him. He no longer needs to stay with me out of guilt or a sense of responsibility.
I hope he chooses me, chooses us. I believe he will. If he doesn't, I will mourn our relationship. I will be hurt. I will have some bad days. But I will survive, and I will recover, and eventually, I will resume living.
I know the nightmares will continue. There is too much horror in my past for me to believe otherwise. But now I know that the daytime will be better.
I'm sure the bad days will still happen. I have too much to mourn, too much sadness in me. But now, I am sure there will be good days again.
I am a Phoenix, and I live again.