Self insert madness

chapter 1 How it came to be

I was bored. It was that simple. Let it be known that whatever happens it was because I was bored. After this week it was decided by my friends that I was never allowed to be bored EVER again. Everything started normally. I was at the canteen with Jade , Andrew and Shania. I was talking to Jade about music while Andrew and Shania stared lovingly into each other's eyes-
''Ow , don't hit me , fine I'll change it''
While Andrew and Shania made passionate love with their ey-
''FUCK , take a joke asshole , ow ow ow no that's my liver I might need that one day.''
I swear some people have no respect for an author's vision. Jade and I were talking while I took the piss out of Andrew and Shania to break up the sexual tension... ''what nothing , sweet they must not be listening , if you haven't already noticed taking the piss out of their relationship is my favourite hobby and you should expect it to happen often, shit they're coming back , don't rat me out they might not notice.''

Maybe I should start again it's not going how I hoped. It was a perfectly ordinary day. No sign that anything exciting was going to happen. Well I suppose that's not true , there was one indication , the date today was February 14th valentines day. It has been suggested that for me to receive a valentines card would punch a hole in the fabric of reality who would have thought Jake would be right for once ? It was a very nice card to be honest , not overly frilly or pink and it came with bubble wrap to pop so clearly whoever sent knew me and had good taste. I turned to Jade to ask if she knew who sent the card when I saw something peculiar. There was a black dot above Jade's head. Shit a black dot getting a lot larger. The black hole quickly began to suck the four of us in as we grabbed onto tables. Jade was taken completely by surprise and was sucked in instantly. I grabbed Jade's coat (she's always complaining about being cold) and my bag and jumped in after her , at least something interesting was happening now. It looked like Shania would be next but in a feat showing that true love conquers all Andrew threw Shania back dooming himself in the process. As Andrew fell in the portal closed , looks like Shania won't be joining us on this trip how ever will Andrew cope?

We were dead. We had to be dead. We were gonna come to on a bed of clouds and as Jade gets into heaven me and Andrew will fall into a lake of fire while she grows angel wings and flips us off. Yeah she does that sometimes. We were in hell. Hell was...a lot greener than I thought it'd be.
''Get your lazy ass off the ground'' and there was the oh so sweet voice of our resident angel.
''Where the hell are we'' wasn't I in such a happy mood? There was a strange sight in front of me. A blonde haired boy in an orange...jumpsuit...whiskers.
''Oh you have got to be shitting me !''

A/n and that's chapter 1 no idea where to go from here. sorry I've not posted in so long. real life is kicking my ass and it's hard to write eroninja while trying to think about serious stuff :( But for now I'm back bitches.