Title: You're Not in Kansas Anymore, Danforth
Summary: Chad was officialy confused. Munchkins? Kansas? What did they have to do with anything and why on Earth was Ryan Evans leaving him hats?
Rating: PG13. Mostly innuendo. One swear word, some nudity.
Author's Note: Can we say MAJOR crackfic? Was high on bathroom cleaner at the time (which is why you should never attempt to get your house in order for moving and write fic at the same time).
Disclaimer: None of this is mine. Unfortunately.
The hats were the first thing Chad noticed as he stepped out of the staff locker room at Lava Springs. Baseball hats, six of them, leading from the door towards the dining room. Too many to be a coincidence. Chad bent down and picked the first one up. It was red and unremarkable, just a 5 cap from Walmart or somewhere. Definitely not designer. Why then was Chad almost certain that he knew who its owner was? It wasn't that everyone he knew immediately associated the word "hat" with the words "Ryan" and "Evans", he just had a feeling, although Ryan didn't seem the type to leave his hats laying around. Chad turned the hat over in his hands, examining it, hoping for some clue as to why it was there, feeling the folded piece of paper tucked under the sweatband on the inside.
You're not in Kansas anymore, Danforth. The Munchkins got it right; think about it. PS. Don't forget your hat(s).
Chad's expression grew more confused as he read the small purple print written neatly on the paper, and then read it again to make sure he hadn't imagined what it had said. Nope, still the same. Chad was officially confused. Munchkins? Kansas? What did they have to do with anything and why on Earth was Ryan Evans leaving him hats?
Deciding to put the latter question to one side (even though he had a sneaking suspicion he knew the answer) and focus on the problem at hand, Chad attempted to decipher the note. It wasn't that difficult really; they had all watched The Wizard of Oz at Gabriella's the week before, so he understood where the reference was coming from. It was just the context that was confusing him.
"The Munchkins got it right," he read aloud. But what had the Munchkins said?
Chad almost hit himself. How could he have missed that one? "Follow the Yellow Brick Road!"
Except there was nothing yellow and brick like about the sight in front of him. It was follow the hats then.
A trail of hats. It was quite clever really. And so very Ryan, Chad thought as he headed out of the dining area and into the Lava Springs grounds, collecting the hats all the way, oddly disappointed to realise that there were no more notes left for him.
The younger Evans twin wasn't someone Chad had given much thought to until recently, always assuming him to be a slightly quieter but infinitely more sparkly version of Sharpay. And Sharpay was not someone he wanted to get involved with. The staff baseball game and everything that followed it changed all of that, and Chad was now pleased to count Ryan as one of his friends, maybe even something more. It wasn't that Chad didn't like girls. He did. It was just that he liked boys as well. He knew this and accepted this and it was why he wasn't as concerned as he probably should have been when he realised that he and Ryan had way more chemistry than he and Taylor had ever had.
The final hat was a familiar pink flat cap, and it was right in front of the door to one of the condos. Ryan's condo. A piece of paper fell out of the hat when Chad picked it up.
You can leave your hat on.
Chad understood that reference and the implications it held immediately. Ryan knew all about his weakness for British comedies in general and The Full Monty in particular. There was no misunderstanding what Ryan was requesting. But outside? He dropped his now considerable collection of hats on the step and pulled out his cell, dialling Ryan's number.
Ryan picked up on the first ring, which meant he had been expecting this call. Bastard.
"You want me to get naked on the front porch of your condo?"
Chad heard as Ryan suppressed a giggle and swore he could almost feel him smirking.
"If you want," Ryan said lightly. "Or you could come inside. It's not locked." Ryan paused and Chad heard the uncertainty creep into his voice. "You're not... you're not freaked out that I would want that?"
"Are you crazy? Just give me a minute."
Chad flipped his cell shut and pushed open the door, leaving the pile of hats on the step.
"You can leave your hat on indeed," he muttered, shucking off his jeans. He removed his tshirt (You know you want this) and hastily pulled off his boxers, protecting his modesty with the final hat, the only one to actually belong to Ryan. He had to admit it, the other boy knew nothing about seduction, but he certainly had style.