Hey guys, Rosey here! I've been on a bit of a Merlin kick lately, and I've read pretty much all the Fem!Merlin stories and thought I'd give it a try. Some things are changes, obviously, Arthur would go at a girl with a mace, or Merlyn wouldn't flirt with Gwen. Now, I'm going to be making Morgana good. Gwen and Arthur never had a relationship. Whoo! R&R! Let me know what you think!:) XxRoseyxX 3
No young woman, no matter how great, can know her destiny. She cannot glimpse her part in the great story that is about to unfold. Like everyone, she must live and learn. And so it will be for the young witch arriving at the gates of Camelot. A girl that in time, will mother the legend. Her name: Merlyn.
As I walk into Camelot, I see the king addressing the crowd and I merge into the crowd to see what the gathering is about.
"Let this serve as a lesson to all. This man, Thomas James Collins, is judged guilty of conspiring to use enchantments and magic. And, pursuant to the laws of Camelot, I, Uther Pendragon, have decreed that such practices are banned on penalty of death. I pride myself as a fair and just king, but for the crime of sorcery there is but one sentence I can pass." King Uther says as he raises his arm and a man swings his ax and behind poor Thomas. I gasp and cover my mouth.
"When I came to this land, this kingdom was mired in chaos, but with the people's help magic was driven from the realm. So I declare a festival to celebrate twenty years since the Great Dragon was captured and Camelot freed from the evil of sorcery. Let the celebrations begin." Uther announces, like killing that man was nothing. Suddenly there's heartbroken wailing and I assume it's Thomas's mother.
"There is only one evil in this land, and it is not magic! It is you! With your hatred and your ignorance! You killed my son! But I promise you, before these celebrations are over, you will share my tears. An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a son for a son." She threatens.
"Seize her!" Uther commands the guards. The woman chants a spell and vanishes in a whirl of wind and smoke. I enter the palace and come across a guard.
"Where would I find Gaius, the court physician?" I ask him and the guard points. I walk up the steps and knock on the open, peeking my head inside.
"Hello?" I ask, walking inside. "Hello? Gaius?" I call out and Gaius trips falling through the railing and I instinctively slow time long enough for me to move a bed from the other side of the room to where Gaius is falling, catching him before he hit the ground, and I know that my eyes flashed gold, which he probably saw..
"What did you just do?" He asks me.
"Erm." I stumble over what to say.
"Tell me!" He demands.
"I-I have no idea what happened." I lie.
"If anyone had seen that.." Gaius says.
"Er, no! That-that was- that had nothing to do with me. That was.." I say, trying to come up with a lie.
"I know what it was! I just want to know where you learned to do it!" Gaius tells me.
"Nowhere." I tell him, which is true, mostly.
"So how is it you know magic?" He asks me.
"I don't." I tell him.
"Where did you study? Answer me!" He demands.
"I-I've never studied magic or, or been taught." I reply.
"Are you lying to me, girl?" He asks me.
"What do you want me to say?" I ask him.
"The truth!" He replies.
"I was born like this!" I retort.
"That's impossible. Who are you?" He asks me.
"Oh, erm.." I pull off my backpack and dig through it for the letter.
"I have this letter." I say, holding it out.
"I-I don't have my glasses." He tells me.
"I'm Merlyn." I tell him.
"Hunith's daughter?" He asks me.
"Yes!" I confirm.
"But you're not meant to be here until Wednesday!" He tells me.
"It is Wednesday." I inform him.
"Ah. Right, then. You better put your bag in there." He tells me.
"You-you won't say anything about, erm.." I say.
"No. Although, Merlyn, I should say thank you." He tells me and I smile. I'm looking out my window while Gaius reads the letter my mother wrote.
My Dear Gaius, I turn to you for I feel lost and alone and don't know who to trust. It is every mother's fate to think her child is special, and yet I would give my life that Merlyn were not so. Ours is a small village and she is so clearly at odds with people here that, if she were to remain, I fear what would become of her. She needs a hand to hold, a voice to guide, someone that might help her find a purpose for her gifts. I beg you, if you understand a mother's love for her daughter, keep her safe, and may God save you both.
Your friend, Hunith.
After staring out my window for a while, I become very tired. I slip on my nightgown and immediately fall asleep. I hear a voice in my sleep, calling out to me.
'Merlyn. Merlyn.'
I wake up and get dress in a plain, brown dress, a tan jacket, tan boots and a red scarf my mother made me before my journey. I walk downstairs to see Gaius is awake.
"I got you water. You didn't wash last night." He tells me.
"Sorry." I say, not knowing anything else to say.
"Help yourself to breakfast." He tells me and I sit down at the table to eat my watery porridge. Gaius knocks over a bucket of water and I stand up and stop it, my eyes flashing gold. Gaius gasps and we look at each other and I let the bucket fall to the ground.
"How did you do that? Did you incant a spell in your mind?" He asks me. I shake my head.
"I don't know any spells." I tell him.
"So what did you do? There must be something." Gaius says to me.
"It just happens." I reply, grabbing a mop to clean the water.
"Well we better keep you out of trouble. You can help me until I find some paid work for you. Here." He says putting a small bag and a bottle on the table.
"Hollyhock and Feverfew for Lady Percival, and this is for Sir Olwin. He's blind as a weevil, so warn him not to take it all at once.
"Okay." I respond, taking the bag and bottle.
"And here." Gaius hands me a plate with a sandwich on it. I smile taking the sandwich.
"Off you go. And Merlyn! I need hardly tell you that the practice of any form of enchantments will get you killed." Gaius tells me and I walk down the Physician's corridor, eating my sandwich, and I finish it before knocking on the door and a squinting old man answers.
"Erm, I brought you your medicine." I tell him. Olwin pops the cork and starts drinking it.
"Oh and Gaius said don't drink it all.." I stop when I see he finishes it. "I'm sure it's fine." I say.
I cross the drawbridge gate into the training grounds and I see a blonde man and a group of knights bullying a servant.
"Where's the target?" The blonde asks the servant, and the others laugh.
"There, Sir?" The servant responds.
"It's into the sun?" The blonde asks him.
"But, it's not that bright." The servant responds.
"A bit like you, then?" The blonde retorts, causing the knights to laugh.
"I'll put the target on the other end, shall I, Sir?" The servant asks, carrying the target.
"Teach him a lesson. Go on, boy." One knight encourages the blonde.
"This'll teach him." The blonde says.
"Yeah." Another knight agrees.
"Ha-ha. Teach him a lesson." The first knight quips. The blonde starts throwing daggers at the target.
"Hey! Hang on!" The servant shouts.
"Don't stop!" The blonde calls back. The servant takes a few steps back.
"Here?" He asks.
"I told you to keep moving!" The blonde calls, throwing another dagger.
"Come on! Run!" The blonde taunts him. The servant shuffles his feet, trying to carry the large target as the blonde continues throwing more daggers.
"Do you want some moving target practice?" The blonde asks him. The servant drops the target, and it rolls to my feet. I put my foot on it so the servant can't pick it up.
"Hey, come on, that's enough." I tell the blonde, who looks surprised.
"What?" He asks me.
"You've had your fun, my friend." I tell him.
"Do I know you?" He asks me. I shake my head.
"Er, I'm Merlyn." I tell him, holding out my hand, which he ignores.
"So I don't know you." He responds.
"No." I clarify.
"Yet you called me 'friend.'" The blonde says to me.
"That was my mistake." I tell him.
"Yes, I think so." The blonde agrees.
"Yeah. I'd never have a friend who could be such an ass." I tell him and start to walk away.
"Or I one who could be so stupid." The blonde says, scoffing and I stop walking.
"Tell me, Merlyn, do you know how to walk on your knees?" He asks me and I cross my arms.
"No." I tell him, digging my nails into my arms to keep myself in check.
"Would you like me to help you?" He asks me and I narrow my eyes. I slap him across the face before I even think better of it. He twists my arms around my back and the knights are all shocked.
"I'll have you thrown in jail for that." He tells me.
"Who do you think you are, the king?" I ask sarcastically.
"No. I'm his son, Arthur." He tells me and takes me out at the knees. Guards escort me to the dungeon and throw me in a cell, quite literally, apparently not caring that I'm a girl. I lay down and fall asleep later that night, and again hear the voice calling me in my sleep.
'Merlyn. Merlyn.'
I hear the voice coming from the floor, so I get up and back away.
'Merlyn.'
The voice calls again and I move toward the floor, inspecting it.
"Merlyn!" Gaius says as he steps in the cell. "You never cease to amaze me! The one thing that someone like you should do is keep your head down, and what do you do? You behave like an idiot."
"I'm sorry." I tell him.
"You're lucky. I managed to pull a few strings to get you released." He tells me. I smile at him.
"Oh thank you! Thank you!" I tell him excitedly. Gaius looks at me disapprovingly.
"I won't forget this." I tell him.
"Well, there is a small price to pay." He tells me and my smile falters. Surely it couldn't be worse than this cell, could it? I was so wrong. I was put in the stocks and pelted with rotten fruit and vegetables by children while Gaius watches.
"Oh no." I mutter and Gaius laughs.
"Thanks!" I tell him, sarcastically. The children leave, probably to get more fruit, those little brats. A woman, a few years older than me approaches.
"I'm Guinevere, but most people call me Gwen. I'm the Lady Morgana's maid." She tells me.
"Right, I'm Merlyn." I tell her, reaching my hand out to shake hers. "Although most people just call me idiot." I tell her, jokingly.
"No, no, no. I saw what you did. It was so brave." She tells me. I roll my eyes.
"it was stupid." I tell her.
"Well, I'm glad you walked away. You weren't going to beat him." She says.
"Oh, I can beat him." I tell her, snorting.
"Well, it's great you stood up to him." She tells me, not believing I could beat him.
"What? You think so?" I ask, surprised she thought so.
"Arthur's a bully, and everyone thought you were a real hero." She tells me and I scoff.
"Oh, yeah?" I ask, raising an eyebrow, not believing that for a second.
"Mm-hmm." She says, nodding. The bratty kids come back and I look at Gwen again.
"Oh, excuse me, Guinevere. My fans are waiting." I tell her and she leaves before the kids start pelting me again. Finally, I'm released from the stocks and I head to Gaius's to get something to eat. Just as I sit down Gaius comes in.
"Do you want some vegetables with that?" He asks me. I scoff.
"I know you're still angry with me." I tell him.
"Your mother asked me to look after you." He says.
"Yes." I agree with him.
"What did your mother say about your gifts?" He asks me.
"That I was special." I tell him.
"You are special. The likes of which I have never seen before." Gaius tells me.
"What do you mean?" I ask him, confused.
"Well, magic requires incantations, spells. It takes years to study. What I saw you do was...elemental, instinctive." Gaius explains.
"What's the point if it can't be used." I ask him.
"That I do not know. You are a question that has not been posed before, Merlyn." He says.
"Did you ever study magic?" I ask him.
"Uther banned all such work twenty years ago." He tells me.
"Why?" I ask.
"People used magic for the wrong end at that time. It threw the natural order into chaos. Uther made it his mission to destroy everything from back then, even the dragons." Gaius tells me.
"What? All of them?" I ask, shocked that the king could do something like that.
"There was one dragon he chose not to kill, kept it as an example. He imprisoned it in a cave deep beneath the castle where no one can free it. Now, eat up. When you've finished, I need you to take a preparation to Lady Helen. She needs it for her voice." Gaius says and I finish my dinner. I walk up the staircase and into Lady Helen's guest chamber, I put the bottle on the vanity table and happen to notice and effigy and special book. I hear footsteps and cover up evidence I was snooping. Lady Helen walks in a minute later.
"What are you doing in here?" She asks me.
"I-I was asked to deliver this." I tell her, handing her the bottle and leaving. I walk through the lower town, and with my luck, pass the blonde, Arthur and his knights.
"How's your knee-walking coming along?" He asks me, and I keep walking.
"Aw, don't run away!" Arthur calls out and I stop walking.
"From you?" I ask and he sighs.
"Thank God. I thought you were deaf as well as dumb." He quips.
"Look, I've already told you you're an ass." I turn around. "I just didn't realise you were a royal one. Oh, what are you going to do? Get your daddy's men to protect you?" I taunt him.
"I could take you apart with one blow. But because you're a girl, I won't." He says, laughing.
"I could take you apart with less than that. And I won't let the fact I'm a girl stop me." I tell him.
"Are you sure?" He asks me.
"Come on, then." One knight says
"Fight." Another one says.
"I should warn you, I've been trained to kill since birth." He says, smugly. I roll my eyes.
"Wow, and how long have you been training to be a prat?" I ask him and he scoffs.
"You can't address me like that." He says.
"Oh, I'm sorry. Ho long have you been training to be a prat, My Lord?" I ask him, giving a mocking little curtsy. Arthur corners me in the market stall and I make him trip and stub his toe using my magic until I see Gaius in the crowd and Arthur takes that opportunity to knock me down. Guards start to pick me up but Arthur stops them.
"Wait, let her go. She may be an idiot, but she's a brave one. There's something about you, Merlyn. I can't quite put my finger on it" Arthur says and I get up, heading to Gaius's chambers.
"How could you be so foolish?!" Gaius reprimands me.
"He needed to be taught a lesson." I tell him, fully aware that I sound like a child.
"Magic must be studied, mastered, and used for good! Not for idiotic pranks!" He explains to me.
"What is there to master? I could move objects like that before I could talk!" I retort.
"Then, by now, you should know how to control yourself!" He tells me and a part of me knows that he's right, but I won't admit it.
"I don't want to! If I can't use magic, what have I got?! I'm just a nobody, and I always will be. If I can't use magic, I might as well die." I tell him before storming up to my room and shutting the door. Gaius comes in a few minutes later with his medical basket.
"Merlyn? Sit up and let me see your wounds." He tells me and I undo the lacing on my dress to allow him to treat the bruises on my back.
"You don't know why I was born like this, do you?" I ask him.
"No." he tells me as he tends to my wounds.
"I'm not a monster, am I?" I ask, trying to joke but my voice tremors a bit. Gaius looks me in the eyes.
"Don't ever think that." He tells me.
"Then why am I like this? Please, I need to know why!" I tell him.
Maybe there's someone with more knowledge than me." He says.
"If you can't tell me, no one can." I say, sadly, Gaius pours a potion in a small cup.
"Take this. It will help with the pain." He tells me and I drink it. I toss and turn in bed long after Gaius retires for the night. I suddenly hear the voice again.
'Merlyn. Merlyn.'
I get up and sneak out of the physician's chambers, crossing the square.
'Merlyn.'
I descend a wrought iron stair case and come across some guards and distract them by rolling their dice away from them with my magic. I grab a torch, light it with my magic and head down a staircase that leads into a tunnel. I walk into the cave.
'Merlyn.' The voice says again, but this time it laughs.
"Where are you?" I call out, feeling rather silly talking to nothing. A huge dragon flies and lands in front of me.
'I'm here. How small you are for such a great destiny.'
"Why? What do you mean? What destiny?" I ask him, assuming it's a him anyway.
'Your gift, Merlyn, was given to you for a reason.'
"So there is a reason." I say.
'Arthur is the Once and Future King who will unite the lands of Albion.'
"Right." I say, not really buying it.
'But he faces many threats from friend and foe alike.'
"I don't see what this has to do with me." I tell him.
'Everything. Without you, Arthur will never succeed. Without you, there will be no Albion. You will help Arthur unite the lands and rule by his side as his wife. Your children and their children will rule Camelot in peace, the way it should be.'
"No, no. You've got this wrong. I'm not marrying him and I'm certainly not having his children!" I shout at him.
'There is no right or wrong, only what is or isn't.'
"But I'm serious! If anyone wants to go and kill him, they can go ahead. In fact, I'll give them a hand." I tell him and he only laughs.
'None of us can choose our destiny, Merlyn, and none of us can escape it.'
"No. No way. No. No. There must be another Arthur because this one's an idiot." I tell him.
'Perhaps its your destiny to change that.' He says before flying away.
"Wait! Wait! Wait, stop! No, I-I need to know more!" I yell after him but I know he can't hear me. I head back to my room and I'm asleep as soon as my head hits the pillow. Gaius comes in to wake me up in the morning.
"Hoy!" He exclaims and I wake up. "Have you seen the state of this room?" He asks me.
"It just happens." I tell him, tiredly.
"By magic?" He asks me.
"Yeah." I agree.
"Yes. Well, you can clear it up without magic. And then I want you to get me some herbs: henbane, wormwood, and sorrel. And deliver this to Morgana. Poor girl's suffering from nightmares." Gaius tells me, tossing me a dress. I get dressed in a dark brown dress with my tan jacket, tan boots, and red scarf and head to Morgana's chambers. As I enter, she walks behind her changing screen.
" You know, I've been thinking about Arthur. I wouldn't touch him with a lance pole. Pass me that dress, will you Gwen?" She asks me and I hesitantly pick up the dress .
"I mean, the man's a total jouster. And just because I'm the King's ward, that doesn't mean I have to accompany him to the feast, does it?" I place the dress on the top of the screen.
"Well, does it?" She asks me, unsure.
"Mm-Mmm." I reply.
"If he wants me to go, then he should invite me, and he hasn't." She says and I roll my eyes.
"So do you know what that means?" She asks me from behind the screen.
"Mm-Mmm." I reply.
"Where are you?" Morgana calls out, and I freeze.
"I'm here." Gwen says and I turn and mouth 'Thank god.' She smiles.
"What are you doing here?" She mouths at me. I hold up the sleeping drought and then motion to Morgana.
"So, it's whether I wear this little tease..." Morgana says, coming out from behind the screen. She looks at the dress in the mirror and holds up a maroon gown.
"...or give them a night they'll really remember." She says turning to me and gesturing to the dresses.
"What do you think, Merlyn?" She asks me and I look at her.
"Uh, I think if you want to torture Arthur for not inviting you to go with him, you should wear that maroon one." I tell her and she grins.
"Oh, I like you!" She exclaims and goes behind the screen to change.
"Aren't you going, Merlyn?" She calls out and I frown.
"No, my lady." I tell her and she scoffs.
"Enough with that 'my lady' stuff. Call me Morgana. And you are going, as my personal guest. Gwen, we'll need to find Merlyn a dress, surly one of the ones I don't wear anymore would fit her." Morgana says and Gwen helps her fasten the dress before the two start deciding on a dress for me to wear.
"What about the azure one, with the silver stitching?" Morgana asks and Gwen smiles.
"That's perfect." She says going and fetching the dress. She comes back and guides me to the changing screen, helping me put it on. Morgana was right it fit perfectly, and it was the most beautiful dress I'd ever worn.
"Merlyn, you look beautiful. It makes your eyes pop." Morgana tells me, smiling widely.
"Thank you, my- I mean, Morgana." I say and she heads over to her jewelry box and pulls out a beautiful sapphire necklace, and I gasp.
"Morgana, that's gorgeous and I can't accept that." I tell her but she refuses, putting it around my neck. It matches the dress impeccably.
"Hush. With a dress like that, this necklace was begging to be worn, and think of it as a gift from a friend." She tells me and I grin.
"What are we going to do about your hair?" Gwen asks and the two start playing around with hair style, until Gwen manages to take my curls and pin them in an intricate updo, with a few strands falling loose. Morgana insists on putting makeup on me, and she only adds some coal around my eyes to make them 'pop' and she uses a red lip color. I look in the mirror and gasp.
"I look... beautiful. You guys are miracle workers." I tell them and they giggle.
"We didn't have to do much. You're beautiful without all this, and Arthur is going to be shocked." Morgana says and Gwen giggles, while I blush. We exit her chambers and head to the celebrations. Morgana walks in first and I follow her, very uncomfortable by all the attention. Morgana doesn't go to talk to Arthur, but to other nobles, while Gwen and I stand off to the side.
"This was a bad idea." I tell her, playing with the dress's sleeve. She smirks.
"Nope, it was a great idea. Arthur hasn't taken his eyes off you since you walked in." She tells me and I look over to see him, indeed, staring at me. I blush and look away.
"He was a jerk that got me thrown in jail, then the stocks, then knocked me on my ass, and now he's staring at me because I'm in a dress?" I ask her and she shrugs. Arthur finally goes up to Morgana and Gwen sighs.
"She looks great, doesn't she?" She asks and I look over at Arthur.
"Yeah." I reply.
"Some people are just born to be queen." She says and I feel irrationally jealous at the thought of Morgana as queen, as Arthur's wife.
"No!" I disagree and Gwen raises an eyebrow. I blush.
"I hope so. One day. Not that I'd want to be her. Who'd want to marry Arthur?" She asks playfully and I feel my blush deepen. No! I don't like Arthur. I don't want to marry him, even if that overgrown lizard says its my destiny.
"We have enjoyed twenty years of peace and prosperity. It has brought the kingdom and myself many pleasures, but few can compare with the honour of introducing Lady Helen of Mora." Uther announces and Lady Helen starts singing, causing everyone to fall asleep. I cover man ears and notice Lady Helen is staring at Arthur and goes to pull a dagger from her sleeve, so I look at the chandelier, I'm glad nobody;s awake to notice my eyes flash gold, and I drop it on her. Court members start to wake, pulling the cobwebs off. Uther and Arthur see Mary laying under the chandelier and she raises up enough to throw a dagger at Arthur. I slow time and run over pushing Arthur out of the way, just in time it seems, and land on top of him.
"Oh, Sorry, sire." I tell him, getting off him. He stands up. Uther and Arthur stare at me.
"You saved my boy's life. A debt must be repaid." He tells me and I shake my head.
"Oh, well.." I say.
"Don't be so modest. You shall be rewarded." He says and I blush.
"No, honestly, you don't have to, Your Highness." I tell him.
"No, absolutely. This merits something quite special." He says to me.
"Well.." I say.
"You shall be be rewarded a position in the royal household. You shall be Prince Arthur's maidservant." He tells me, everyone applauds, except Arthur groans. Gwen looks at me with a teasing smile.
"Father!" He complains. Arthur and I look away from each other. I head back to my chambers and I hear a knock, and Gaius comes in.
"Seems you're a hero." Gaius tells me.
"Hard to believe, isn't it?" I ask him, jokingly.
"No. I knew it from the moment I met you. When you saved my life, remember?" He tells me.
"But...that was magic." I explain.
"And now, it seems, we finally found a use for it." He says, nodding.
"What do you mean?" I ask, curiously.
"I saw how you saved Arthur's life." He tells me.
"Oh, no." I say.
"Perhaps that's its purpose." He says to me.
"My destiny." I say, sighing.
"Indeed. This book was given to me when I was your age, but I have a feeling it will be of more use to you than it was to me." He says to me and I unlatch it, looking inside.
"But this is a book of magic." I say to him.
"Which is why you must keep it hidden." He tells me.
"I will study every word." I promise him. There's a knock on the physician's chamber doors.
"Merlyn, Prince Arthur wants you right away." The guard tells me. I sigh.
"Your destiny's calling. You'd better find out what he wants." Gaius tells me and I scoff.