Chapter One:
Amy was running late, out of breath, probably with sick in her hair and stuck behind this loser in a fancy car. This guy was making a meal out of this parking manoeuvre and she was just about ready to ram him. As he pulled out and twisted a millimetre to the right for the hundredth time, Amy was just about ready to give up. She didn't ever think she'd be back here again and now she was even screwing up her first day back.
The brick front of Cloud 9 loomed over her steering wheel and she had the crushing sense of being 16 again. The nerves were different this time. Now she wasn't concerned with what was going to happen-she knew the ins and outs of this place-but rather, how they were going to react. The people she'd waved goodbye to over a year ago. They couldn't judge her. That she was sure of. If you were working at Cloud 9 past the age of 17 something had gone really wrong for you, but still it was hard. She had been the bright eyed, bright brained girl who was going off to find better things. And now… she was back.
Finally the jackass was done and Amy took the opportunity to squeeze past him and park quickly before sprinting into the store, hoping that she still held enough good grace that her tardiness would be forgiven. She stepped through the automatic doors and the familiar tinned music filled her ears. She really was back. "Amy!" Glenn, the store manager greeted her as soon as she was through the threshold. "Oh I am so excited to have you back!" He looked just how she remembered him. Same blue shiny tie, same ill-fitting shirt, same weirdly floppy haircut. "How're you feeling?"
"I'm feeling great!" She said, lying through her teeth which were bared in a strained grin. "Happy to be here!"
He beamed at her, a hand on his hip. "Well you are just in time. The other newbies are here and about to be welcomed to the team! You can join them, although I think you'll see some familiar faces. Not much has changed since you left!"
"I can see that." Amy said as she walked past the fancy deck chairs that she put together two years ago.
The break room was filled with Cloud 9 employees, all waiting around for the day to begin. Usually Glenn would be starting the morning chant but that time was taken up by the introductions. Amy walked into the room, the same false smile pinned to her face as she waved at those who greeted her, and tried not to show that she was dying inside.
"Good morning gang!" Glenn said, walking up to the front. Amy got her first glimpse of the newbies. Two guys, one Filipino guy with a fancy haircut and a cheek splitting grin plastered across his wide face. The other a tall white guy, dark hair and dark eyes. She supposed someone might think him attractive. Not her though, obviously. "Well don't we have an exciting morning?" The workers all looked bored. All except Garrett, sat at the front, looking strangely at Amy. She tried to ignore him. "First up can we all give a warm welcome back to Amy? Now, I know most of us are used to seeing her around store but since she's been gone for over a year I want you to treat her as if she's new. Don't expect her to know everything just because she used to be an old hand at this." A few people smiled at her. Glenn had clearly been hoping for a bigger reaction but simply cleared his throat and moved on. "Next we have Mateo," The Filipino guy waved. "And Jonah!" The other guy quickly interrupted Glenn.
"I would like to say that I am incredibly excited about working here with all of you." Amy rolled her eyes. Clearly this dude had never worked in retail before. No one is excited to work here.
"Indeed, it is truly an honour to join this team of incredibly devoted staff. Let's go out there and change lives!" A fist pump ended Mateo's speech and a wave of silence echoed through the room. Amy sighed and walked with the rest of the staff out into the shop floor. There was no need for a procession, Amy just wanted to get this over with.
"Hey," A voice called from behind her. Garrett rolled into view. "I didn't know you were back." Amy nodded. "What happened?"
"Things just… didn't work out." Amy said vaguely, praying that this would be sufficient.
"M'okay." Garret said, his eyebrows raised. If Amy knew Garrett then this wouldn't be the end of it, but at least it bought her until his morning break.
"Hey!" Another voice called out. Amy felting like screaming into the pillow she was plumping. That Jonah guy came up to her. "I'm Jonah." He said, holding out a hand. Amy just looked at it.
"Yeah I know." She reminded him.
Jonah ran a hand through his hair and tried again. "So you used to work here?"
"Yup." Amy said, moving down the shelf and straightening the bedsheets.
"Any advice for a newcomer?"
"Show up on time, do whatever Dina tells you to do and… clock out as soon as you can."
"Cool." He said looking awkwardly at the floor. "Good advice."
"Where are you supposed to be?" Amy asked suddenly, rounding on him. She had no time for this guy and his stupid face. "Because I'm pretty sure following-along-behind-Amy isn't a station."
Jonah looked a little taken aback but seemed to get the hint. She watched as he backed away, arms slightly raised. Good. She didn't need any kind of distraction today. If possible, she wanted this day to go as smoothly and quickly as possible.
"Ma'am?" An old lady appeared just as Amy was passing the changing rooms. "Could you help me? I'm… a little stuck." The woman pointed down. Amy followed her glance and then quickly averted her eyes. The old woman, possibly in her mid-70s, was wearing an intricate lingerie set that involved many straps crossing over the other. Amy breathed, trying to remember why she was doing this. I have a baby at home to feed, I have a baby at home to feed…
"Of course!" She said keeping her tone bright and breezy. "Let's go find a spare changing room."
"So why'd you come back?" Amy knew it had been risky. Trying to sneak past Garrett's desk to the breakroom had been a rookie error. He had her in his line of sight and now she was done for.
"Would you drop it if I told you I didn't want to tell anyone?"
Garrett just smiled cheerily and shook his head. Amy crumpled a little. Maybe it wouldn't hurt if one person knew. And she and Garrett had always got on. He made her laugh and she helped him out of tight spots with customers. There were worse people she could trust. "Okay fine." She said and walked over to his desk. "But this stays between us okay?" She said, looking over her shoulder. Garret did the same and nodded, drawing a line over his heart. Amy smiled and reached into her pocket for her phone. Then, she lit up the screen and handed it to him.
"And this is yours?" He said, pointing to the beautiful baby girl in the picture. Amy couldn't help the proud smile that crossed her face. "That makes sense." He handed the phone back to her.
"So college didn't really work out what with a baby and all." Amy explained. "So I'm back. But only until she goes to school. Then I'm going back to college to become nurse, just like I planned."
"I believe you." Garret said. She smiled at him. She really shouldn't have been so anxious about telling anyone. People weren't as judgemental as she thought, especially not here. "And I think you're doing a good thing. Supporting your child." But then his eyebrow quirked. "Who the baby daddy though?"
Amy rolled her eyes. "You know Adam, the guy that I was dating when I worked here?" Garrett nodded. "Well it's him. And actually he's been really great. He even proposed a few months into my pregnancy."
"Ohh." Garrett said although Amy didn't know if it was meant in a good way. "That's real nice. Good for you." It definitely wasn't meant in a good way.
"I think it's better for the baby if we're together. And, I mean we had been dating for over a year when I got pregnant so maybe we were always meant to get married this just… created urgency."
"Right, sure… look, I am happy for you. And I'm glad to have you back. Maybe things will actually start getting done around here again." Amy chuckled.
"If I have to be back I'm glad you're here too." Amy told him. Garrett smiled and then clapped his hands together.
"Right, I need some food!"
The break room was empty except for Dina and Jonah, the latter of who was looking understandably uncomfortable as Dina was sat straddling the seat, shuffling closer to him as the talked. "So that's a no on the girlfriend front then?" She was saying as Amy and Garrett entered.
"Yeah, fine… Hey guys!" Jonah said, waving them over. Amy thought the poor guy looked desperate so she sat down next to Dina.
"How's your first morning going?" She asked politely, trying not to notice how nice his smile was.
"Great, I have helped an old guy buy some condoms, unblocked the toilets about five times and tried to find a type of dog food that turns out doesn't exist. Yup, the woman had dreamt it but insisted we look in every aisle in the shop." Amy and Garrett laughed knowingly.
"Welcome to Cloud 9." Amy said.
"Yeah that sums up pretty much every day here."
Jonah scrunched his eyes together a little. "Great." He nodded at Amy. "So what do you guys do to alleviate the boredom?"
Garret snorted. "Don't look at Amy for entertainment. She's always just been about clocking in, doing the work, and clocking out again."
"That makes me sound so dull." Amy commented.
"Well I didn't say it." Garret replied. Amy smacked his shoulder.
"So what do you do to alleviate the boredom?" Jonah redirected his question to Garrett who leaned back and began to stroke his chin.
"Well I have the advantage of controlling the intercom. So I can have a lot of fun with that. Making people run from aisle to aisle. Announcing a made up sale that lasts 30 seconds. But other than that… there's always the cars."
"Oh no." Amy warned. "No way. I will not stand for it."
"What cars?" Jonah said, clearly curious. Amy rolled her eyes at this guy. He'd barely been working at the store for three hours and already he was sick of it? She didn't give him three weeks working here.
"Oh… you'll see." Garret said ominously, chuckling as gestured for Jonah to follow him. Dina's eyes followed the two out of the door and then she quickly turned to Amy.
"That Jonah is built like a bamboo," She had an intensity in her eyes that made Amy feel uncomfortable. "And this panda wants to lick him all over."
Amy backed away quickly after that. Good to know that nothing has changed.
Smack.
Amy closed her eyes and tried to remember that she was an adult now. And adults did not beat up their co-workers in public.
Smack.
Smack. Smack.
"Hey Amy…" Garrett's voice called.
Smack.
"Come play with us."
Smack.
She let out a muffled scream. It was taking all of her willpower not to stamp on that stupid little car.
Smack. It hit the back of her ankles again and she was sure that she was going to go ape at them. The whirring noise of its little engine taunted her as she heard it reversing and driving. Forward and back and forward and back. Always into her ankles.
It seemed Jonah and Garrett had gotten bored of driving those little idiot toys around the aisles, slaloming in between customers and equipment and staff. Now they wanted to annoy her. Under the guise of getting her to join in. But really they wanted her to snap. And she wouldn't give them the satisfaction.
Smack.
She tried to walk away but the stupid little thing wouldn't stop following her. The giggles of the grown ass men controlling the car echoed behind her and she imagined herself on a deserted island. Away from Cloud 9, away from annoying co-workers and away from any kind of…
Smack.
"Okay!" She suddenly yelled, turning around. "You got me. You wore me down. This is the reaction you are getting. I am giving you what you want. I am acknowledging that you have annoyed me. Can you please stop now? Some people have work that they are trying to do." The boys peeked out at her from behind the display sofa.
"You know you could join us?" Jonah offered, driving his car around her in little loops. "Have some fun?"
"No, thank you." She said, keeping her voice even as the anger inside her flared. Who was this guy? And why did he think he could tell her what she should be doing? He didn't know her! She gave them a half-hearted smile and turned to walk away.
Smack.
That did it.
Amy whirled around and in one motion had picked up the car and in the other threw it full pelt at Jonah's head. He ducked but just a second too late and the car struck the top of his head with a satisfying smack. Amy watched as he was knocked back, falling onto his side as the force of the car sent him off balance. "Who do you think you are?" She shouted at him. "I'm trying to do my job, a concept that you seem incapable of understanding. I don't have time for fun. Some of us would actually like to keep our jobs, some of us need them for more than paying for fancy hair products!" Jonah looked terrified. Good.
"You had to take it that one step too far didn't you?" She snapped at him. "Well I hope your head hurts and I'm not sorry for throwing it at you." The last part sounded lame, even as she was saying it, but it's what it was. She wasn't going to lose sleep about it. Instead, she walked away leaving Jonah rubbing his head and staring after this intriguing girl.
"Sir?" A man walked up to Mateo and patted him on the back. With a grin, Mateo turned to greet the customer.
"Yes? Can I help you?" He asked happily. Mateo was sure he was having the most successful first day in the history of Cloud 9 employees. He had already sold 2 microwaves and had taken it upon himself to re-order the clothes section in a more fashion forward way.
"I need to find the socks."
"Great, they are just down by the clothes; if you take a right on aisle 23 and then it'll be halfway down."
"I don't want clothes, I want socks." The man says, an irked look growing on his face.
"Of course, but the socks are with the clothes on aisle 23."
"I know where the clothes are, I want the socks!"
"Sir." Mateo said, trying to keep his voice light and fluffy. "If you'll just hear me out." The man shifted on his feet and moved closer. Mateo fought the urge to step back. "The socks are in the same section as the clothes."
"I want socks!" The man pushed Mateo's right shoulder.
"Of course, if you would just follow me, I'll take you to the socks."
"I better not see no clothes aisle…" The man muttered behind Mateo who let out a small whimper.
It didn't take long for her to feel guilty. She had really lost it on the poor guy. To be honest, there was still a part of her that thought he deserved it. And a part that thought the image of that car bashing him in the car was kinda hilarious. But, no, that was mean. And she was a mother now. Could she imagine if her mother had lost her temper and thrown something at somebody? No, she couldn't, because Mothers were supposed to be sensible. They were supposed to have everything sorted and figured out. What would she do if her daughter annoyed her like that? She couldn't exactly keep a car handy to throw at her.
Amy worked silently, keeping an eye out for Jonah and ducking behind an aisle whenever he walked past. She didn't know how to face him. How to own up to something so childish and absurd. God, this was such a weird day. At home with the baby and with Adam everything had felt… secure. Being a mother was something she enjoyed and looking after Emma was so wonderful and fulfilling and… in a weird way simple. But coming back here, working here again… it all felt very unstable. To be honest she'd felt majorly depressed all day. It brought the reality of the situation to the forefront. Before, when she was at home, she could pretend that this was what she had wanted. What she had planned. But having to come back and face what had actually happened, it felt really shitty.
Not that she regretted Emma for a second. That was the light of her world and she loved that little baby more than anything. But it wasn't what she had planned. When she left Cloud 9 before she had been going to College, becoming a nurse, experiencing life and meeting new people. Then eventually settling down and having a baby. But now everything was twisted and it felt like she was going backwards.
"Hey." She had been so lost in her own thoughts that she hadn't been paying attention to her surroundings. And now Jonah was standing in front of her holding a jar of olives and there was nowhere for her to hide.
"Why do you have olives?" She asked.
Jonah shrugged. "It was the closest thing to an olive branch I could find." He admitted, holding out the jar for her to take. It was a weird move but she admired the sweetness of the gesture. "I'm sorry." He said.
Amy cringed. "No, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have lost my temper… how's your head?" She asked noticing the slight red blotch on the top of his forehead. Jonah's hand quickly touched the spot.
"It's fine, really it wasn't even that hard of a bump." Amy raised an eyebrow. "Okay, yeah it did hurt quite a bit but," He paused flashing her a wry smile. "I am impressed by your throw. Have you ever considered Baseball?"
Amy couldn't help but chuckle at his joke. "Again, very sorry."
"Nah, I shouldn't have pushed it." He admitted.
"Well…"
"I just, wanted to see you have some fun." Jonah told her.
"Well I'd appreciate it if you just let me do my job. It's much easier to work here if you just lean in with the boredom. Eventually time slips through your fingers and shifts over."
"That sounds terrible." Jonah told her. Amy just shrugged.
"Maybe it is."
They stood awkwardly in silence for a moment. Then Jonah sighed and said, "Nope, no I don't think that's true. You can find fun and joy in anything." She suddenly felt like an old woman talking to a bright eyed boy filled to the brim with optimism. She'd hate to infect him with cynicism and reality just yet. Not when he was so confident in his stance.
"Well I wish you all the best. But I'm going to wade through the boringness." Jonah nodded and they reached a peaceful checkmate.
Soon after Amy made some kind of excuse and walked away. She was pretty sure Jonah was a decent guy even if he was slightly annoying and conceited and arrogant and grating and egotistical. So she would try and be civil and let him and Garrett muck around if they wanted to. After all, they were just doing what they needed to do to get by. She snuck a look at her phone and smiled. This was what she needed, small reminders of what was waiting for her at home.
It was just getting dark as Amy's car pulled into her driveway. She and Adam were living in the basement of her parents' house and, while it wasn't ideal, it was cheap and convenient. So she opened the white door and smelt the familiar scents of her Mom's cooking, smiling as she also heard the sounds of her little girl laughing. Amy walked into the living room and saw Emma lying on the floor under her mobile. With a happy sigh she lay down next to her, pressing a kiss to her forehead and patting her stomach. Emma gurgled and kicked her legs in recognition and Amy felt her heart flip. God, she loved this little girl. "Mommy is so happy to see you!" She said, giving in and scooping her baby up into her arms. She saw on the fluffy carpet of her living room and rocked her baby gently in her arms. "Oh she's missed you so much."
A small tear formed in the corner of her eye. She hadn't realised how true that sentence was until this minute. Being away from Emma for so long had been horrible. Not being there to give her breakfast, not being able to take her to the park. Spending her day helping strangers buy useless junk instead of caring for her child. Amy clutched Emma to her chest and pressed another kiss to her head. The thought of leaving her again tomorrow made her heart ache.