My Dearest Sam,

The handwriting gave it away, huh? I imagine you're thinking what it is that I want to tell you in a letter that I can't say in person.

I'm scared Sam. In fact I'm petrified because what I'm about to tell you is going to change things between us. For so long I tried to ignore it and pretend it wasn't happening but the more I try to keep it inside the more it takes a hold of me. I can't keep living like this because THIS that I'm doing, Sam, isn't living. At least not any more.

For a long time now, I've been fighting an internal battle. Some days are good and for a short time, I can forget but the thing is I'm losing Sam and if I keep this in any longer…I don't know what will become of me.

I've spent countless nights thinking, imagining how this would go and to tell you the truth, even whilst I'm writing this letter, I still don't know how to say what it is that I want you to know. So, I'm going to keep it simple and let my heart guide me.

We've been friends for so long and been through so much together. We've laughed and cried. We've lost friends and…we've lost family. We've stood side by side and fought against unimaginable atrocities and evil here on Earth and out there, in the vast expanse of space. We've witnessed miracles the likes of which I never thought possible. Experienced every aspect of life, explored our own humanity and felt all spectrums of emotion. And we've also come home broken both in body and spirit and each time we've held on and survived.

There have been many times over the last couple of years when I thought I'd never see light again but all I needed to do was close my eyes and see your face and the darkness would disappear. It still does. There have been moments when my will to live weakened and more than a few in which I thought I would die. During each one of these times all I could hear was your voice telling me to hang on, to fight through it. There is one reason and one reason only as to why I'm alive today and that reason is you.

Whether it was the thought of never seeing you again, of never hearing you laugh or never seeing your gorgeous smile again, it was always YOU who pulled me through some of the darkest and trying moments of my life. For that, I want to thank you.

I remember the very first moment I saw you, my heart began to beat to a rhythm all its own. I can only liken the feeling to the way the earth moves beneath the hooves of stampeding wild stallions in the grips of the white hot fever that is life pumping through their blood.

Samantha Carter I want you to know that you're unlike any woman I have ever met. The strength and courage you have has no measure. Your wisdom, compassion and imagination continue to awe me. Your passion and desire has never wavered for as long as I have known you. You are a brilliant and gifted scientist and an exceptional human being. You are a dazzling and vivacious person who touches lives wherever you go. I've never met a woman more beautiful inside and out or as inspiring as you. To me you are simply breathtaking.

There aren't enough words to explain how much I respect you or how much I value your friendship.

All I know for certain is that somewhere along the line I have fallen in love with you. Fallen so deeply in love with you that infinity and forever still isn't enough time to show you.

I know I will die with regrets and that's okay but the one regret that I don't want to die with is for you to never have known how much you mean to me.

No matter what happens between us know that I will always walk beside you, I will continue to push you forward from behind and I will run ahead and hold out my hand to encourage you to come forward – I always have and always will, because I love you.

Yours forever in friendship and in love,

Cameron Mitchell.