It started same as any other day. I was actually beginning to feel as though my life were normal. I had a family that cared, a home, love. I had everything I had always dreamed from those years at the Institute. I should have known that happiness never last for very long. When I really think about things, I realize how much of an idiot I was to believe that someone like him could ever be happy with someone like me. He was Voldemort, cruel and heartless, incapable of love, or so everyone kept telling me. I knew from the start, could see it in his eyes, that he wasn't incapable of love, he had simply never been given the chance to experience it. I made sure, from that first day, that anything I did was all for him, and that I would be the one to show him what love was.
It was foolish to think that he would ever just be happy with me. He had a war to fight and he made it clear that his number one priority was to see the end of Potter, his friends and The Order. So many nights he went out with his followers, leaving me to wonder every time if it would be the night he won, or the night I lost him. On too many occasions, someone came back injured, dead or close to it. On too many nights I spent so much energy trying to heal those I could, that I couldn't even remember falling asleep.
"Well, disaster it strikes on a daily basis Heroes and Thieves at my door
I'm looking for wisdom in all the wrong places
But still want to laugh in disappointed faces
You can't help me
Blinded by these
I can't seem to tell them apart anymore
Just when I've figured it out
Well darlin' it's you I'm without."
"Tom?" Melodie looked through the crowd of Death Eaters as they came through the front doors. Some walked, some were leaning against others for support, and some were carried. She caught a flash of platinum hair and reached out to touch the arm of the man she knew was behind the mask. Lucius turned to look down at her, his eyes the only thing she could see. They were the only thing she needed to see. The raid had been unsuccessful. They had been set up. Aurors and Order Members had been waiting on them. It was a massacre. They still didn't know who had been captured, or who was dead or simply unconscious.
She looked at the figure in his arms and sighed, closing her amber eyes. "Lay him down. I'll do what I can."
Once Draco was stable, she stood, wiping the blood from her hands onto her jeans. She smiled at Lucius in what she hoped was a reassuring manner and patted his shoulder. As she turned to look at the sea of black, white faces looked up at her. There were so many wounded, and blood was everywhere. Still, she couldn't find her Tom. She went from person to person, doing what she could for them. In total, she counted seven dead, thirteen wounded, and four missing. Thirty had gone out.
"Well I'm stubborn and wrong Heroes and Thieves at my door
But at least I know it
Keep moving along until I can get through this
But maybe this song is the best I can do it
So I'm patiently waiting on these
I can't seem to tell them apart anymore
Just when I've figured it out
Well darlin' it's you
Darlin' it's you oh,
Darlin' it's you I'm…"
As she covered the last of the seven, a hand landed on her shoulder. She looked up to see him, garnet eyes showing her all the thing he would never say aloud. Every other time she would wrap her arms around him, hold him, check him for wounds and make sure he was alright. She shook her head and shrugged his hand off, stepping back before turning away and heading up the stairs. Not this time. He had to realize what it did to her. He had to come to the knowledge that she could only handle so much before she broke completely. This was one time where she would not falter, where she would not give in. He could yell at her, curse her, do what he wanted, but she was standing firm in this. As she opened the door to her room, she could hear his footfalls on the stairs. As she closed and locked the door, she could hear the brush of his robes against the carpet runner in the hallway, and as she pulled out a black messenger bag and began to fill it with clothes and the other small things she needed, she heard him knock.
She moved to the door, her hand reaching for the knob out of habit before she realized and pulled it back. She pressed her forehead against the wood for a moment, the image of him standing on the other side in her mind, and pressed a kiss to the door. She pulled away and headed for the open window, pausing to leave a quick note on her bed before taking up her broom and flying off into the darkness.
"Without your comforting logic
Like these days are the ones I'll miss
And I see a solitude that I can't find without you.
Ah ah, ah
La da da"
He had walked away that night, heading to his own room across the hallway. Surely she would come around in the morning. Until then, he would rest, regain his strength. As he showered, he wondered what had made her run off. She had been fine when they had left. Crawling into bed he turned on his side, his back to the place where she usually slept. Having separate rooms was merely a formality, a way for her to have a space that was entirely her own. He fell asleep feeling oddly cold, but unable to figure out why.
Morning came, then afternoon, and soon it was dark again and still she hadn't come out. He was growing impatient and angry. He marched up the stairs and down the hallways, knocking harshly against the door. Nothing, not even the sound of movement. He spelled the door open and was met with an empty room, the only movement being the curtains in the breeze of the open window. As he walked further in, he noticed things were missing. Her brush, her wand, and the small bear he had given her, though he would never admit it, for her birthday. He noticed, too, that most of her muggle clothes were gone from the closet, and her broom was nowhere to be seen. He sat heavily on the bed, something on the pillow catching his eye. She'd left a note.
"Well, it seems like I'm getting closer somehow
A flicker of peace that I've finally found
Thank you for believing in me now
'Cause I do need it"
Two months had passed before she even noticed. It was hard living on her own. She'd taken enough money with her to afford a small flat for a few months and to get some food, but she knew it could only last so long. She needed a job, and soon. She made her way through the streets of muggle London, as she did every day. A few streets over from her building, she noticed a small black sign with red letters in a store window. 'Help Wanted. See Inside for Details.' She smiled softly. Fate, it seemed, wanted her to succeed.
By the end of the week, she was working full time as a clerk in the store, selling clothes that reminded her of her days with Tom. They were dark, and elegant, with chains, studs, spikes and all other sorts of things. She had even begun taking some of the money left over after her bills were paid to buy some for herself.
As she lay in bed one night, she looked out her window to see the moon looking back. It was almost full now. She thought of her life over the past few months, having settled into living on her own. It was something she had needed, but had never realized. It was giving her the chance to grow up, to become her own person and live her own life the way she wanted to live it. Living her life without magic was easier that she had thought. Magic reminded her of him, and that wasn't what she needed. She had locked her wand away the first week she had been there, and hadn't thought of it since.
"Well, give me a year or two
And I'll mend my ways and see these mistakes and
When I see the truth
Well, darlin' trust me
When I can't see
I'll be coming back; I'll be coming back to you"
He had kept the note, folded neatly, in his pocket. When he was alone, he took it out and read it again. It was beginning to show signs of wear by the sixth month, but he couldn't bring himself to toss it. As he sat in his study one evening, a full moon bathing everything around him in a soft light, he took it out again.
'I couldn't think of any other way. I need some time to myself, some time away from all the pain and the death that seems to follow you as closely as I do. I can not compete for your attention anymore. I'm not sure where I'll go, or when I'll come back, but I will. When I've come to understand myself, and the world, I'll come back. I hope by then, you'll have decided what is most important to you. I love you, and I know you care for me, but do you love me? Can you love me? I'll want an answer when I return. Until then, know that I will be fine. I've survived this long, after all.
-Melodie'
What was important to him? He used to think he knew. He had always wanted power, recognition. For years he had wanted Dumbledore to pay for what he had put him through. Leaving him in that hell of an orphanage, treating him with suspicion rather than the adoration of the other professors, denying him the Defense Against the Dark Arts post. He had wronged him at every turn. Then came Potter. At first, he had tried to be rid of the boy simply because he wanted no competition. Then the boy had blocked his curse, destroying his body and leaving his soul to wander the world in search of a way to be reborn. Victory had always been his goal. Then she had come into his life.
In the time she had been with him, she had taken up a place by his side, had stood by him when no one else would. He had been an idiot not to see it until she was gone, but she had become important to him. As he sat in a wing-back chair before the fireplace, he suddenly realized that nothing else was as important to him. No longer did he care about Potter, and ruling the wizarding world was nothing more than a notion in the back of him mind. He didn't need followers, or power, he needed her. He could only hope that she still needed him.
"These heroes and thieves at my door
I can't seem to tell them apart anymore
Just when I've figured it out
Well, darlin' it's you
Darlin' it's you
Well, darling it's you I'm without
Ah, ah, ah."
One morning, I woke up and realized it was time. I don't know what made that day so special. I took my wand from its hiding place, and felt the power flow through me for the first time in three years. With a wave of my hand, everything I had was packed and shrunk, stuffed into my messenger back. I felt a small pang of sadness as I left the place I had called home for so long. I flipped off the lights and locked the door. As I went down the stairs and made for the front entrance, I stopped. I knocked on the door marked with a large golden five and was met with the smiling eyes of the landlady.
"I have to go home now. There's someone I left behind, someone very dear to me. I only hope he still needs me." I handed her the key and walked way. In a back alley, I took a deep breath and pulled out my broom. It grew to normal size and I mounted, kicking hard off the ground. I was going home, going back to him. Hopefully he would still want me around.
It was dark when I finally saw it. The manor was a beautiful as ever, bathed in moonlight. I noticed with a sad smile that the window was still open. I made a silent landing in my room and magiced my things away. I changed into my pajamas and Silencio'd my footsteps. I opened the door silently and listened. When I heard nothing, I made my way across the hall and opened his door, closing it just a quietly. I could help the tears that fell as I saw him, sleeping somewhat peacefully. I fought them, not wanting to wake him, but they refused to silenced. I pressed my back against the door and slid down, sobs making my shoulders shake violently. I wrapped my arm around my knees and buried my face.
A hand fell on my shoulder and I shot forward, my arms wrapping around him so tightly I heard him grunt and take a deep breath. As my tears dried, he held me just as tightly as I held him. It seemed as though we were clutching onto our only lifelines, as though we could only save each other. I pulled back and looked into his eyes. My hand came up, my fingers brushing his face gently. We didn't need to speak, we already know what would be said. His lips pressed against mine, and that was all I needed. Everything I had ever needed and wanted was in that one kiss. We both knew that I would never have to leave again. We knew what was important.
A/N: Made for the Vanessa Carlton challenge by SlytherinPrincess02 on forums. I own Melodie and the plot. The song is Heroes and Thieves by Vanessa Carlton, and Tom and Lucius are property of JKR. Please R&R. Criticism is more than welcome.