There was the metallic sent of blood in the infinite darkness before me.

"Heicho."

"What is it?"

"I'm sorry..."

I catapulted upright in bed, heart hammering in my chest. Sweat tickled down my face, sticking my hair to my forehead as I glanced around my messy room in despair.

I'm home.

"Oh god." I gasped, terror still locking up my joints. "Shit."

'Calming breaths, Eren. It was just a dream.' A voice said in the back of my mind, making me shoot another panicked look around my room. The clock on my nightstand glared in green 1:04.

I began to pace between my desk and my window, clutching my phone in distress.

It was raining outside, the deep grey clouds lighting up with the occasional lightning strike. The ruble came shortly after, making me sigh and sink to the floor. I put my head between my knees and ground my teeth together.

All I remembered from my dream was blackness and a voice. My voice. Then someone else's.

The voice was deep and familiar.

It was strangely comforting.

Sometimes, that feeling came over me. It was like I was on the brink of remembering something important and if I just thought about it for a bit, it'd finally dawn on me. My frustrations went unresolved each time because I'd sit for hours at a time, mind wandering to the voices, the screams, and the emotions I didn't recognize as my own.

When had I ever felt like that? Like I had lost something so important that my soul had been breaking apart? Why was my heart broken to a million pieces over that voice? Who meant that much to me that it had hurt me so much?

I felt like I had failed someone.

A massive rumble of thunder shook my house, making me hug my legs tighter. I took a hissing breath between my teeth and unlocked my phone.

2:38 in the morning. Had that much of time really passed? It was going to be hell getting up in the morning.

I heaved another heavy sigh and shuffled to my bed, fell onto it not bothering to use my sheets and gazed at the ceiling. The lights of Boston cast a cold glow over my room, lightning lighting it up brighter for that split second.

My heart ached in my chest. It felt like a hole in my chest was ripped open and it pulsed with raw agony. Each heartbeat hurt.

I shook my head, clenching my eyes shut and rolled onto my side.

I genuinely begged my brain to shut off and let me sleep.

I was still conscious when my alarm buzzed at 7:00 to wake up. I didn't even move to turn it off, I just let it buzz until Mikasa knocked on my door is concerned irritation, "Eren get up already and turn that thing off."

I silently rolled over and slammed my hand on the snooze button.

"Didn't sleep well again?" She quizzed, eyebrows drawing together in concern.

"Yeah. I'll live though."

My morning was a blur, I was on autopilot as I did my mundane morning tasks.

"Eren is something going on? You seem kinda out of it the past couple of days..." Mikasa sat across the table from me as I mechanically chewed my cereal.

"Just been having weird dreams. Don't worry about it too awful much." I muttered into my bowl.

"Maybe it's the weather. It's been raining for a week straight."

I shrugged, I didn't have the heart to tell her been like this for months. These weird dreams that plagued my conscious and sucked the life out of me.

She looked at me suspiciously for a moment.

"Maybe you're depressed?" She offered.

I glared at my adopted sister's suggestion and she shrugged in response, black hair falling around her in a wave.

Before I was even remotely ready to tackle the day, I was on the subway that took us to Trost Academy. The stop just before we got to school, Armin boarded and smiled at us in greeting.

"Hey, Eren. Mikasa." He nodded to each of us, "Did you guys hear about that big wreck that happened on the interstate last night?"

"What wreck?" Mikasa cocked her head slightly.

"It killed three people, one including Mrs. McAllister." Armin's voice got quiet as people shuffled uncomfortably around us. "Did you not hear about it. It was all over he news."

"Hey, wait a minute," I narrowed my eyes at Armin, "Mrs. McAllister is my french teacher." And one of my favorites.

"Well, yeah. That's why the school has gotten so involved."

Well shit. There went all my hope for getting that last credit for my graduation. "Who is going to teach the class now? If I don't get this credit, I'm not going to get to graduate!"

"From what I understand, they just have to hire a new teacher. They're not just going to drop the class, Eren."

I heaved a sigh of relief, "Good. Let's hope the new teacher will just pass me. I don't want to have to work."

"This is why you've fallen behind on credits, Eren." Mikasa shook her head in dismay, "You need to actually put effort in."

I snorted and dropped the subject, leaving us in an awkward silence as we exited the train.

The second my foot hit the floor of the school commons, I felt the heavy atmosphere.

"Armin!" An all too annoyingly familiar voice called across the large room, "Hey, over here!"

Jean mother fuckin' Kirstein waved his arm through the air to catch Armin's attention.

"I'll catch you guys after school." I muttered, letting them attend to their own friendships. I wanted nothing to do with any of them at the moment.

I strode quickly to my first class, french, to find the room empty. I sighed in relief, jammed my headphones into my ears and cranked Mystery Skulls as loud as I was comfortable with.

I tugged my sketchbook out of my bag, flipped to the next blank page and began to doodle mindlessly as I usually do. My mind wandered as my pencil worked automatically, sketching out a humanoid figure, adding muscles and medium length hair. I drew my eyebrows together in concentration, detailing the body like it was an atomically correct muscle poster you'd see in the first year biology rooms. I darkened the lines, shading the details just right then slammed my pencil to the desktop. It looked grotesquely conversant, I imagined the creature to be massive, cold and unintelligent eyes sparkling in bloodlust.

There was an abrupt tug on my earbuds, one popping out of my ear. I snarled in irritation, casting a death glare to whom ever had disturbed me in the zone.

Armin looked at me with concern, blue eyed wide at my expression.

"Hey Eren." He started as I smoothed my expression and turned my music down so I could hear him. "I've noticed something recently."

"What would that be?" I questioned, closing my sketchbook.

"You've seemed a bit off for the past few months. Like, especially today. Has something happened?"

I hesitated, disgruntled by his tone. "Nothing happened. How am I acting different?"

Way to go Jeager, play dumb.

"You've been kinda, depressed I guess. Like you aren't yourself. Mikasa asked me if you'd told me anything. She's concerned too."

"Armin. Thanks for being concerned, but it's nothing. I'm just stressed."

He studied me suspiciously, and stood. "Okay. But if you need anyone to talk to. I'm still here."

The bell rang loudly, signaling my personal hell to finally begin.

I debated on zoning out after our substitute teacher walked in with Principal Smith. The tall, built man stood neatly waiting for the class to quiet down.

I continued studying my drawing, intrigued by the familiarity if it. Had I seen this creature in a movie or something? I'm pretty sure they're called Titans-

Principal Smith cleared his throat and began speaking, his deep voice snapping me out of my thoughts

"As most of you know, your teacher, , passed yesterday after being in a car accident sometime around eleven o'clock last night."

Some students shuffled uncomfortably in their desks. My head began to throb.

"I am here to give my condolences to all of you, and encourage you to talk to our counselors if you need anyone to grieve to."

"We will be holding a memorial service on Friday after school in the auditorium. Feel free to attend."

"We also have a new teacher who will start tomorrow, you all will treat him with respect and not make excuses because of this. We have to move on and continue despite this tragic event. If there are any questions or concerns, come talk to me personally and I will see to it any issue is solved."

He nodded after a moment of silence, turned and whispered something to the sub then left without another word.

Shit. Now what?

"Oi, Eren. What are you drawing there?" Connie Springer peered through my arms that were now covering the Titan sketch. "That's freaky looking. Is that from a video game or something?"

I shrugged, "I don't know. I just drew it.

He nodded in approval, "That's cool."

"Tell me, Eren. Do you resent me?"

"No, sir."

The man sat next to me, addressing me in an almost concerned voice. The corporal was never this sympathetic. Ever.

Another voice spoke, I didn't catch quite what they said.

I gazed at the person in front of me, glasses and eyes sparkling in both concern and twisted fascination. She held out a cloth with a tooth on it and I guess it was mine. I opened my mouth and the woman looked in shock.

"It's already grown back!"

The cold sweat that covered my face made me cringe and take in my surroundings. I took ragged breaths as I to my surroundings.

Where the fuck am I?

"It's about time you woke up." I heard Mikasa's unhappy sigh from the seat next to the bed I was laying on. "I thought you'd died in your sleep or something."

Confusion set in. "What happened? How long how I been out? How did I get into the nurses office? "

"Jean had to carry you here. You passed out in your desk suddenly and put the whole class into panic." Armin cast a troubled look at me from across the room. Jean stood at the window, looking out without speaking.

"It's two, by the way." I heard the deep, velvety voice of Principal Smith from the doorway. "Are you feeling better, Eren?" I couldn't tell if he was angry or not. His blue orbs were the usual look of mild scrutiny and his posture was relaxed.

"I suppose so, sir." I didn't meet his eyes and told the lie like I meant it. My head was still throbbing agonizingly.

"You shouldn't come to school if you're ill, you know. I went ahead and had your absences excused for the day, you may need the day off tomorrow, no?"

Suspicion instantly shot through my veins, "No sir I feel better now. I can get to class now-"

"Your father has been contacted. I'm sending you home, you need the rest." He interrupted me then turned to Mikasa, "You too. If he passes out again, call a doctor or send him to a hospital."

"I'm okay, seriously-" I started but stopped at the sharp look Mikasa's gave me.

The second we left the school, Mikasa had her phone out and called my Dad. She jabbed an earbud in my ear as we waited for the subway.

"Hello? Mikasa?" My dad's voice was in my ear, "Where are you at?"

"We are in the subway waiting for the next one to come through" She answered.

"Is Eren with you?"

"Yes, do you want to speak to him?"

"No. It's okay. I was going to ask you, has Eren been having issues sleeping and eating? Has he told you about having nightmares?"

Mikasa looked at me, then answered, "I'm not going to lie, yeah he's had all of those."

"For how long?"

" I'm not sure? A while now I guess."

"How long is a while?"

"Maybe a month or so."

There was a pause and then my dad's long exhale.

" Well, from the symptoms you've described and the things the principal has told me, Eren is showing symptoms of PTSD."

PTSD? I mouthed the words to Mikasa and she just shrugged.

"How could he have that? He's not suffered trauma-"

"Sometimes people can get PTSD from traumatic events. The only way to help him is to send him to to a therapist or similar." My dad was using his doctor voice now, I'd heard it plenty of times growing up. "People who suffer from PTSD show signs of anxiety, depression and sometimes have suicidal thoughts. I want you to keep an eye on Eren and make sure he doesn't do something reckless until I can get home."

"I doubt he'd take it that far." Mikasa looked irritated at that suggetion. "When will you be home?"

There was another pause, "I'm not sure. Sometime soon though-"

The subway came to a screeching halt, opening up and let people on the platform board.

"Train's here. Bye." Mikasa didn't even give my dad time to answer before hanging up and tugged the earpiece away from me.

I stepped into the tin-can on wheels and took a seat away from the other people in the compartment. Mikasa sat next to me and snarled venomously, "The only way you'd get PTSD is if you went to war or something. I think honestly that you are just stressed from starting senior year off like you have. If he'd actually stop by the house or call sometimes, he'd see that."

I snorted, "Easy now, Mikasa, of you keep talking like that I'd say you resent Dad."

She just looked at me, ridiculing my feigning of innocence. "It's not that I resent him. I'm just a tad pissed that he's never here when we need him."

"As long as he pays rent and utilities on the house and leaves us as usual, it's all good in my books."

The silence hung heavy, as we rolled up to our stop and stood to get to the door. I glanced around me and pulled out the sketch of the Titan from my pocket and sighed.

When I stepped off the subway I wrinkled my nose at the smell of exaust and cigarette smoke. The wind blew through swiftly, snatching the paper out from my fingers. It flew out of my grasp and Mikasa gasped in surprise, clutching to her scarf desperately.

"Where'd that come from so suddenly?" she hissed in irritation, but I didn't quite comprehend what she had said because I just numbly watched the sketch fly through the station and up the stairs.

Well shit.

The rest of the afternoon drug by painfully with absolutely no excitement whatsoever. Quite frankly I was bored out of my goddamn mind. I resorted to lounging on my bed, earbuds plugged in and a playlist of EDM going.

I studied my ceiling, light fading to darkness as the day passed away into night. I was so tired, but my body just couldn't shut down. I rolled over, a massive sigh breaking me out of my sleep-deprived trance.

Slumping onto into a sitting position then standing, I decided to go out for a walk. My hand stiffly dug through my nightstand drawer, snatched the small box and stuffed it into my pocket.

"Shit."I huffed, realizing I was almost out of cigarettes. Judging from the weight of the ox I had maybe one or two left. I'd have to get some when I saw Bertoldt next.

The second I shut the front door, I had a cigarette poked between my lips and the lighter burning the tip. Shrugging my jacket on my back, I set out to aimlessly wander through the city.

Boston was still alive, even though it was already 1 in the morning, the sounds of the intestate rang through the air. I stepped off the curb, avoiding the massive stream on water slinking through the gutters.

The rain had let up to a bare mist, but the clouds still looked down on the streets maliciously, anticipating the opportunity to strike again with vigor.

I walked a few blocks down to the subway station and skipped down the stairs as the rain began again. I flicked the ashes off my smoke and studied the empty tracks.

My mind wandered back to what my dad had said as I stood at the platform. Was PTSD really my issue? Is rhat was what causing me to turn into this awful mess? Did other people just get it out of the blue?

I pressed the heel of my palm into my sternum, feeling as though my heart itself stirred in discomfort.

I looked around me, disgruntled by the restless feeling I had in my gut. The station was empty, sans myself, and then a man stepping nonchalantly down the stairs.

I studied this man, curiosity getting the better of me. Why would anyone out this late? Why was I even out this late? Maybe he was as restless as I was-

The man looked up, meeting my gaze. I saw recognition flicker across his face. What hit me next made my knees weak.

De ja vu.

I stood, knees locked and stunned as the train pulled up. The man nodded in recognition of my existence then boarded the train. I felt myself sway, starstruck by the familiar feeling that smashed my soul to agonizing peices.

The doors shut, and the train began moving.

"WAIT!" Suddenly I was running next to the train, looking in the window at the man in panic. He looked back at me like I was insane, "Wait! Have I met you before? Hey!"

He shook his head and looked away as the subway speed forward. I kept running until the platform ended then stopped and watched in disappointment as it dissolved into the tunnel.

My heart was in my throat as I sank to my knees.

"What the hell is wrong with me?"

That next morning, I rose with not a single w

ink of sleep. My exausted mind and body worked automatically, nodding to questions when I was asked.

I wasn't all there and Mikasa noticed first thing. Her attentive questions didn't quite reach me. My mind was on the man I had seen in the subway.

The haze continued relentlessly as I got to school, sat in french class and mindlessly doodled on my french notebook.

The teacher was late, they said the new teacher would be here today-

"What're you drawing there, Jeager?" Jean snorted mockingly at me. His friends snickered and Marco elbowed both of them.

I blinked, looking at my drawing. Before I could respond, the door of the classroom flew open and a short, dark haired man strode in, black roper boots clicking against the tile.

My jaw hit the floor when I met the teachers eyes.

I glanced down in panic at my paper then back up to his stare.

An irritated spark flashed across his expression as he held my gaze, slammed his suitcase on his desk and stood in front of the now silent class.

He cleared his throat, broke eye contact and began speaking.

"Good morning, class. My name is Levi Ackerman. Call me Riville." His voice was so familiar. I looked up again in shock and focused on his face. Black undercut hair, heavy lidded, tired eyes and an almost monotone voice. The similarities hit me like a million bricks. I glanced again to the sketch on my notebook.

It was him! The man from my dreams-!

Lance Corporal Levi.

Heicho.

"Don't bother with all the formalities." He continued, storm grey eyes betraying not a single emotion.

"You all know your previous teacher has passed and I'm here in her place. I'm sorry for your loss so early in the school year." He paused to write is name elegantly on the chalkboard. I felt lightheaded as he finished the E with a flourish. Something in my soul stirred in discomfort for the second time today.

"Hope you little shitstains aren't offended by foul language because it's a habit of mine I refuse to break."

"Don't think just because your previous teacher is gone that you'll get to blow off the rest of this school year in this class. It's going to be like a normal class is going to go. Do your homework, don't turn in shit for projects, listen to lectures and don't slaughter your enunciations."

He nodded to himself if finality then turned to the chalkboard again. Principal Smith nodded to Riville and turned to leave the classroom.

I took a wild breath and stood.