This is the other abused!Harry story.
The one where the Dursleys don't hit Harry or keep him in the cupboard. Where they buy him new glasses each year and make him dress properly in clothes that fit him. Where Aunt Petunia searches high and low for professional styling gel for Harry's unruly hair, to make it behave. Where Harry dutifully puts it on every morning, even though it never works, bc he doesn't want to disappoint Aunt Petunia.
The one where Harry gets excellent grades bc he doesn't want to end up like his no-good parents. Where he always receives just as many presents as Dudley bc he and his cousin are Petunia and Vernon's entire world. Where he never, never breaks the rules.
The one where Petunia tries to civilize the magic out of Harry. Where she tries to bribe it out of him with love. Where the Dursleys treat Harry just fine.
Just fine.
(Not really.)
Author's Notes: So I dig through the abuse stories on this site pretty regularly and something I've noticed is a dearth of stories about abuse that is not sexual or physical. Obviously, most sexual and physical abuse is accompanied at least in part by emotional/verbal/psychological abuse, but the latter often occurs without the former. As a survivor of this kind of abuse I wish I could see more fics that validated my experiences without having to feel like I'm creeping in on someone else's party. Hence, this monster.
This story has four parts, three of which are complete and posted. I may sequel it, but it absolutely stands alone.
If you relate to this, pls review so I know you exist.
My trigger/tagging/warning policy: I err on the side of caution, and this fic is already dark. Heed the tags.
Warnings: Emotional Abuse, Verbal Abuse, Psychological Abuse, Child Abuse, Narcissistic Mother, Isolation Tactics, Manipulation, Self-Harm, Physical Abuse (via Umbridge), Mention of Suicide, Gaslighting
Disclaimer for entire fic: JKR owns HP and can take my money anytime she wants.
This Is the Other Story
This is the story of how an old man leaves a baby on a doorstep in the dead of night on Halloween, and sets a precedent in doing so.
Petunia Dursley still flinches when she sees her sister's green eyes in the child's face. She still reads the letter twice over without making a move to bring the infant inside—for once in her life, she pays no mind to spying neighbors.
This is the story of how, instead of all but abandoning Lily's child, Petunia decides to take him as her own—take him and make him so completely her own that it will be like he was never Lily's in the first place. How Petunia's spite and vengeance are channeled into proving that Petunia could, in this one thing, do better than Lily.
She almost changes the boy's name, just as she almost decides he should call her Mum. But the wizards are touchy about such things and somehow the resolution just keeps slipping from her mind, like sleight of hand (like magic), until it's too late. Duddy-kins is calling the child "Hawee" and Harry answers back to it. Petunia decides that if she can not choose Harry's name then he should not call her Mum. She remains Aunt Petunia.
Vernon grumbles at first but he never refuses her anything and they both know it. He buys the story she sells him about their two brave boys, facing the frightening world together with nothing but her and Vernon to protect them. Vernon likes to feel useful. So she lets him keep the boys happy with games and googoo eyes and he lets her see to what's best for them.
This is the story of how Harry grows up believing that his parents died in a drunken car crash and that he was so lucky that his good-for-nothing mother had such a wonderful sister. How Harry believes Aunt Petunia loves him more than anything else in the world and would do anything to be worthy of that love—and Petunia is perfectly happy to explain to him her very reasonable standards for that as many times a day as it takes.
Petunia buys scar cream for Harry's forehead and plays Beethoven in the nursery. She dresses the boys in matching, complementing wardrobes. As soon as they are able to grasp commands and objects she teaches them responsibility: put this away, keep that straight, no crumbs, no messes, be good. And before she turns out the light each night she tells them that she will always, always protect them.
Harry and Dudley keep to themselves in primary school. They follow instructions and sit quietly in class. The teachers are delighted by such studious pupils. They always bring lunch because eating outside food is risky. They never stay after school or wander off the school grounds like the other kids because loitering is for lazy children, not perfect ones. They're always dressed immaculately. They're labeled 'stuck-up' by the other kids and Petunia reassures them that people are cruel, but if they behave and grow up right they'll have the last word. She teaches them responsibility: put this away, keep that straight, no rude questions, no mistakes, be good. And before she turns out the light in their lavish, separate bedrooms each night she tells them that she will always, always protect them.
This is the story of how, when the letter comes and Petunia realizes that she will lose this particular battle, she explains to Harry that he is going to be the finest wizard there ever was, even better than his good-for-nothing parents. How Petunia learns to use owl post and expects Harry to write a report on his behavior every week and come home for every holiday.
The accidental magic puts a kink in the regimen. It starts a divide between Dudley and Harry. Petunia stresses self-control to Harry and suggests he take Dudley as an example. Dudley's stocky bone structure becomes less adorable as he leaves infanthood: Petunia stresses self-control to him and suggests he take slender Harry as an example. She scolds Vernon for spoiling them both. The differences pile up, scraping the edges of her control. Harry needs glasses; Dudley doesn't. Harry takes to reading; Dudley takes to sports. Harry is obviously a wizard; Dudley most likely not.
When the letter comes, it is addressed to Mr. H. Potter in the second bedroom and Petunia does not waste time running away from the inevitable. Her reply to McGonagall is effusively courteous and full of enquiries about Hogwarts's expectations, safety precautions and teacher credentials. The trip to Diagon Alley sparks Petunia and Harry's first fight: Petunia buys Harry the best of everything and more besides, but Harry (only eleven and easily distracted by every passing display of magic) fails to be properly grateful. Petunia takes several hours to explain to him how he is a young man now and he must learn responsibility: put this away, keep that straight, no attitudes, no mistakes, be good. And just before he gets on the Hogwarts Express she put as hand on each of his shoulders, the closest she ever gets to hugging him, and tells him to make her proud and she will always, always protect him.
This is the story of how every time Harry writes Petunia about dark lords and homesickness and culture shock and loneliness, she tells him to work harder and do better and ignore the wizards' backwards ideas. Petunia makes sure that Harry knows he has no one to depend on but her—and in a den of mistrustful snakes (the Sorting Hat hisses Slytherin for Harry almost as fast as it does for Malfoy) it takes a long time and a few miracles for Harry to learn anything different.