[God's tail]
Ah! It's me Tallemy again. This is a little short story for the AU called Mourning Stars, centering around the daily life of Tenma and Saru. Tenma lives in a smaller, two floor big mansion on Mount Hanami (it's a real place). He is the son of the tengu king of their southern kingdom and he was sent to Tottori* to be the new heir of that region since the king there has no successor.
Tottori prefecture is where the province of Inaba was in the ancient times. Fun fact is that crown prince Shindou lived in Kyoto, the old capital, what is only 4-5 days away on foot from Inaba! :D
He was not a god anymore. Everyone knew this and accepted him in his current state, only Saru denied and fought against the fact, showing himself stronger than he really was. But by now he lost almost all of his powers and he was nothing more than a monkey youkai with snow white hair and a gracefully curving tail. Only a troublemaker who often trampled over the crops of the villagers, never knowing the value of food.
Ten long years have passed since he was banished from Takamagahara, the world of gods and he still often thought about how ridiculous it was that he meant less of a threat than the common crow tengu, named Tenma. They boy didn't have special powers just a fan that could generate enormous winds or gentle breeze. he could never quite understand why didn't Tenma use his powers to achieve great things as he could've easily become the king of Hanami with his ability. Yet every time he tried making Tenma to take some actions he was turned down. The tengu never wanted power since he was happy with the current way of his life. Saru on the other hand remained power-hungry.
As they say, bad habits never really die, and he happened to experience this more intense than anyone. His goal was to rule over the whole mountain and to achieve this, he started serious territorial brawling with the local youkais, attacking their parts of the mountain what ended up him being beaten to pulp. Yesterday, he tried to conquer the area where the forest imps lived, but in the end he crawled back to his host's home on his stomach, tired and almost frozen into a solid ice cube. He closed the door behind himself with a thud and after a few steps the boy simply collapsed, limply sprawling out on the warm floor. He slowly closed his eyes, trying to relax his muscles on as he felt the cold disappearing from his body.
Outside winter still raged, occasionally closing every path leading down from the mountain. It was a terrible weather to begin with and it was worse than any winter they saw together. Tenma warned him, begged him to stay at home, but when Saru had planned out everything it was impossible to stop him. He just laughed at the tengu for thinking he would get lost in the forest. Now he had the chance to feel the coldness of earth as he stumbled home from the mountains after his defeat. Something was wrong with him, ever since he fought with the imps. He was unable to keep his balance and stumbled like a new-born deer. A curse. It had to be a curse what was cast on him by the imps. It made him unable to walk properly and made him lose balance! he was sure the next time they encounter him the whole imp tribe will be destroyed, burned down for tricking him.
"Tenma!" Saru shouted hoping that he can get a little help to reach his room sooner. The tengu should've been at home since he hasn't mentioned anything yesterday about his plans for today. Then again almost a whole day passed since they last seen each other and Tenma had the tendency of suddenly taking off to unknown places, probably Inaba or Nichinan since he loved helping out there.
"Tenma!" he tried to draw some attention, but again, no response. Surely he was playing around with that human again, but if this is true then there is no way, that he will be at home before nightfall, or worse, he will sleep there because of the cold, not coming home at all. How pathetic. He will end up dying here from starving or frost because Tenma, out of all of his followers, Tenma happened to be on a trip, when he was defeated.
He collected every power in his muscles as he tried to get up again while he was crawling toward the stairway on all four. The ground wanted to run out under his hands and he was still unbalanced, but it seemed four worked better than two this time. He headed towards the stairway and clutched the banisters to gain some support. After he managed to get into standing position again, Saru hesitantly started climbing, putting his feet one after another. The attraction was unsure, but he somehow managed to get his footing back and in no time he reached the top, or so he thought because when he released the banister his weight pulled him down. It was only pure luck that he managed to grab the banister to stop himself from rolling down to the end of the stairs.
"Tenmaaa-! Where the hell are you?!" He hit the banisters with his fist and it had high chance that the stairway will join the list of 'Saru's victims'. Back at the middle of the freaking stairs.
As he was writhing in his own agony, flapping of wings could be heard from outside. He knew this sound oh so well so he wasn't surprised when the door swung open and with the cool breeze a familiar face appeared with momentary panic in his eyes. His blue and yellow kimono was covered in snow and his trousers were soaked up to his knees.
It was way too unnatural seeing Saru sitting on the stairs.
"Sa-Saru! What have you done now?" he asked anxiously as he ran to him instantly, starting to measure the boy's condition, carefully studying the bite marks on his skin, along with the blue and purple bruises. He only hoped that he won't find bloodstains anywhere, like last time when Saru had a fight with the wolf of the snowfields on the nearby mountain.
"I haven't done anything, all right? I had a little fight with the locals again. Can I ask for help, though?"
"Yes, but first tell me who your opponent was." Tenma demanded instinctively flapping his wings.
"I-Imps." he muttered trying to hid his face in embarrassment.
He didn't want to mention that these imps were simple forest imps, much smaller than their relatives living in the mountains.
If he was next to some kind of hiding place he would've surely crawled under or behind it, and stayed there until next morning, when the rays of humiliation were weaker on his back.
Tenma looked at him in silence for a few seconds, but the monkey god was sure the boy was laughing at him behind his back, because he was so easily defeated by some feeble imp. Moreover, after this he was certain that he will get good portions of lecturing about him not being a god anymore and being only a... monkey.
"But... Why are you sitting on the stairs? After all you just enco-"
"Now that's what I'd like to know!" interrupted him Saru nervously "I'm weak! And no matter what I do I can't get up. Tenma, I'm cursed! How can you not see it?"
"Se-Seriously?! When did this happen? What kind of curse? Will you be alright?"
"How should I know? Sometimes you just don't expect me to give you a list about my daily routine." he growled and his tail would instinctively move if a sharp pain doesn't remind him about its presence. With a jagged motion, he raised it and began massaging the numbing point hoping to relieve some of the pain. Unfortunately as soon as he tried moving it again the pain pierced it in a new point.
"What happened?" Tenma leant closer, but when he tried to touch the snow white monkey tail, Saru pushed his hand away, protecting his precious treasure.
"Do you think I screamed in happiness? Does it seem like this to you?"
Despite the rather trenchant comment, Tenma smiled and helped Saru up from the stairs, making sure to not put too much pressure on his heroic wounds either. The youkai or ex-god was often rude to him and tried to control the tengu's acts, like Tenma was his slave or at the least, he was standing beneath him on the rank list. Yet Tenma could never hate him, as Saru never did anything harmful, except for that one case when he hit a giant hole on the wall, when Tenma wanted him to calm down. This was a taboo among them as they never spoke about that night ever again. Ú
On that day Saru's ego and pride suffered a great injure, it was impossible to talk to him for almost a month as he avoided Tenma in his own house.
At first it might haven't look like this, but Saru was heavier than Tenma. It took them some time until they managed to dance their way to the room of the mountain god, where Saru was left alone again.
With a tired sigh he stretched on his futon, stuffed with various feathers, while he was waiting for Tenma to return with the painkillers. When he first arrived here he thought the bed was uncomfortable, but now the pervasive scent of birds and the warmth radiating from the sheet calmed him and his thoughts down. It was hard to imagine what would happen if he didn't woke up with this every day, especially when Tenma's scent lingered throughout the room.
Of course, he still wanted to conquer the mountain in order to show the Sun God, Taiyou he is worthy of being a god and he still have enough strength left to oppose him. Yet, the simple and idyllic life made him uncertain about a lot of things. Maybe day by day, more people lost faith in gods but as interested he was in this issue before his banishment by now Saru was too far away from that world to feel the importance of this. They were in danger since gods gradually lost their powers, but he had to admit that in the current state of the world it's inevitable and he had to admit that Taiyou and his decisions were reasonable. The world must have been turned upside down after the years he spent among mortals.
The curse wasn't in his tail, instead it appeared in his heart when he'd first met with Tenma. When he came to his senses, he was already attached to the boy making dumb jokes losing his godly attitude and being… normal? Was it how they called it? Was this the normal way of living? he had to admit he never enjoyed anything in his life this much as the last ten years but was it really okay for hi to feel this way?
Yeah.
The only problem was that boy called Tsurugi. If he could he woould've killed him long time ago and maybe this way Tenma would stay with him. But this would make the tengu sad, showing an emotion Saru never wanted to see on his face again.
The warmth of blood on his hands. The terror on Tenma's face. It all came back to haunt him again. If he killed Tsurugi too, then…
"I'm back!" said Tenma almost singing the words as he knelt beside Saru and put down the basket, what possibly contained the medicines. He carefully leant over the boy sending him anxious glances, Saru looked back at him from the corner of his eye, but he was too lazy to move. "Is it that bad?"
"For the sake of God Tenma, I'm fine!" he sat up quickly "Have you never heard of fatigue?"
Tenma just laughed and almost routinely reached out for the marigold potion to disinfect the cuts on Saru's body.
"My sleeping schedule is normal and I don't have big plans to achieve so no I think I've never heard of it." he grinned. Partly on Saru and partly on how clever was this comeback.
"Don't smile this much. It's annoying." said Saru and tried escaping when Tenma approached his face with the yellow cream in order to smear him with it. "Take that stinking junk away from my face! Tenma! I swear you're going to regret it, if you dare to put this on my face!"
"Eh. Do you want scars on yourself or not?" Tenma narrowed his eyes. Treating Saru was sometimes like wrestling with a toothless tiger. He didn't bite, but even so it took him an eternity until he could enforce his will onto the god.
Now this seemed to be a good reason for the boy because Saru almost immediately sat back and with a slight blush appearing on his face, he let Tenma do his job. It was totally unnecessary, since even in this state his would heal quicker than a regular youkais but still, it made Tenma happy so he didn't object.
Sometimes the tengu worried too much for him, even after he told them not to be. Saru tended to stay out for nights or days when he discovered the area, making Tenma to stay up all night waiting for his return. For the first few times, he called Tenma stupid for this, but later he slowly understood the emotion called 'worry' and it made sense to him why the tengu was so tired. He gradually became more thoughtful of his acts earning another human form of behaviour.
Tenma massaged the healing cream on his injuries watching out for the bruises as he held Saru's arm in his hands. The silver haired boy, slowly got more and more relaxed when he felt the pain disappearing from his body leaving out a relieved sigh.
"Is it good?" asked Tenma curiously, eyes glittering with joy.
"Yeah. One could say this you have gotten better at it." nodded Saru trying to contain his emotions. Seeing Tenma so happy from a petty praise like this was too much for him too.
"Thanks! I guess it's flattering, coming from you."
Too bad the pain came back as soon as the tengu started touching his aching tail. It was the most sensitive, vulnerable part of his body, but in his current state this sensitivity had been squared.
"He-Hey!" he wanted to pull away his tail from the curious hands, but with this he would risk Tenma pulling on it creating unbearable pain. Instead he gritted his teeth and let Tenma do what he wanted. Sometimes Saru let out a loud hiss or two, when the youkai started gently pushing the skin to feel the position of the bones.
Tenma sighed after he nearly scanned the whole tail. "How did you break it in so many places? Saru, this is not healthy."
"Tenma I'm a god and gods can't break their bones. Are you trying to underestimate my power? I don't know what broken bones are as I never experienced it. Are you sure this isn't a curse?"
In response he only felt a weak grip on his tail, not strong, but enough to send a paralyzing pain through his entire body.
"What's this then, Saru? And this?" He squeezed it at another point. When he felt, he tortured the self-proclaimed god enough he took out a long rag from the basked, wet from lukewarm medicine he got in case his suspicions will be right. 3You should be more careful."
"I'm a go-" before he could finish the sentence Tenma tightly pulled the wet cloth around his tail generating a new wave of pain, but at the same time calming down the swollen body part.
"Stop this. Everything would be alright if you haven't harass the people of this mountain-"
"But-!"
"Look, please, will you be a god if an oni eats you? I don't want anything bad happen to you so please listen to me. You don't need to prove anything to anyone! You're Saru and that's enough for me." Tenma told him with an oddly serious voice, prompting Saru to think about his actions and decisions in his one man's war.
He hated Taiyou, hated to be so weak, but most of all he hated to have Tenma as his only support in the human world. The tengu was so carefree and cheerful, he looked for the good in everyone, unlike Saru and this irritated the god. Staying at the place of someone who was his counterpart.
What he hadn't noticed was the chain hanging around his neck, preventing him from escaping. The lord of mountains was captivated by the simple life and the partner with whom he shared it.
Tenma worked without a word after that, softly humming a song he heard at the town, gently twisting the fabric around the monkey's tail to avoid further movements of his bones.
"Saru, I meant to ask this when I got home…. I think since you're you could answer a question..."
"Sure? I know the answer to any question." Saru looked back at him with a puzzled look on his face.
"Great!" Tenma's face lit up with a wide smile as he let his finished work slipping out of his hands. "I have a friend who, like me, is a youkai and he is in love with a god. Do you think it's possible? I mean, there is no prohibition to such cases, right? If the god feels something towards him then they can be together, right?"
Saru was silent and stared at the wall lost in thoughts. No, there were no restrictions about love between gods and other beings. Their title served as a noose around their neck anyway. God. Timeless Being, which oversaw the balance of the world. For them, love only existed until the parties got bored of each other and they went to search for a new partner.
"The god will outlive the youkai" he replied coldly "There are no rules as it's nature's job to punish them. They have to watch as their loved one gets old, decays and turns into dust in front of them. Just as a person's life is only a blink of an eye for a youkai, same is true with youkai and gods. A few minutes, nothing more and they cease to exist." Saru's voice gradually changed from the initially sinister tone to a more desperate, and slowly but surely began to superimpose his problems onto Tenma's. The situation was the same, only with Tenma and himself. He spent a lot of sleepless nights thinking only about this and now this came up in a regular conversation. Just who was the god?
He tried to take deep breaths, calming down his troubled soul, but he could only think about the youkai dying between his arms, how he will have to bury him if he gets stuck on the earth.
"Saru, is everything all right?"
Tenma worriedly put his hand on Saru's shoulder and tried to calm down the troubled youkai.
"O-Of course. What do you think?" he looked at him with a mocking smile. "My mind just wandered off a bit, that's all. You know, I thought what would happen if I accidentally outlived you. Silly thing right? But I think this place will be too empty for me."
"But this is still far away in the future and it seems unlikely." Tenma said his thought out loud.
"Yet the problem is real. What if you die? I would suddenly lose all support in my life. Tell me, what should I do if that happens?"
"Everything will be all right." he crept closer to Saru and pushed a thin cloth into his hands. Yeah, true, He didn't even notice that he started to sob in the middle of his monologue.
"I shouldn't have brought it up." Tenma said finally, his eyes reflected compassion but he didn't know what else he should say.
"This was your first good idea today." Saru said, this time facing Tenma and leant closer to him. It was feared that the thought will invade his mind once again and he only saw only one solution to avoid this...
Tenma's black wings opened and Tenma let out a startled yelp. The ex-god put his arm around his waist and leant on him with his full weight, knocking them both down to the floor while half of their bodies remained on the futon. The tengu just laughed awkwardly not knowing what to do with Saru, but he left the eccentric god to snuggle closer to him and bury his face into his yellow kimono.
Gods existed, they walked among humans and Tenma never doubted Saru for a moment, however, because he played dumb in the presence of the god he gained a very good friend.
"Can I tell you what happened in Inaba today?" he inquired.
"Do you think I'm interested in such pitiful things?" muttered Saru petulantly trying to move his tail but the bandage Tenma put on it prevented him. "It's bad enough what happens in Nichinan and in the valley. I can't control them. I don't care about a town where those two human live."
"You should try talking with the villagers, instead of playing the role of an emperor." laughed Tenma wholeheartedly and intentionally ignored Saru's comment about the Tsurugi brothers. Since autumn he spent a lot of time together with the brothers and the mountain god became remarkably sensitive about the subject. He could've sworn the Saru was jealous of them for some reason and lately he was extremely snappy when he even mentioned them.
"I wanted to tell you about something else." he said trying to pull his wings back to his body.
"Ah! Shocking developments! So tell me, but I want you one word about those and you will feel my rage!" he looked at Tenma again, pinching his nose with a bored look.
The story began with a rabbit who was waiting for the god at the gates of the city, but the boy fell ill and now he can't leave his room. That was the reason why Tenma was away for so long. he was collecting herbs for him, as he said. The history of Inaba slowly unfolded before him and thanks to Tenma's vivid storytelling he felt like he was the part of the everyday life and the sometimes happy sometimes bittersweet stories.
Saru really wanted to go with him. To see how Tenma spent his life when he wasn't with him. This would make Tenma spend more time with and he wouldn't get stuck in the background waiting for his return, with unrequited his feelings. He tried making him stay at home for many times, but Tenma always escaped from home somehow. Keeping him in a cage was out of question.
"Tenma... Can I go with you the next time? I would like to see Inaba for myself." he looked up, but the smile on Tenma's face almost immediately blinded him, so he had to put back his head to the boys's chest.
"Would you really, really come with me?" Tenma sat up not caring about the laying Saru in him.
"Yeah? I thought I said that?"
In that moment Tenma pulled Saru into a tight embrace and the god was sure, if the imps spared his life, then the tengu will surely kill him. They fell back together to the hard floor as Tenma was trying to word his happiness somehow.
"I'm so glad! I knew you would come with me one day if I kept speaking about it! Believe me, you'll love it!"
No. Saru was sure he will hate that trip. Towns had something he hated; humans. Hundreds of humans. But if Tenma was so happy about it... maybe he could enjoy it as well.
He only wished the hot feeling to disappear from his face before the tengu starts asking about it.
A/N: Ugh… This… I'm so sorry okay?