Behind The Lens
"Ever Milore hair and makeup Ever Milore." I got up slowly and walked to hair and makeup. That's how they talk to us models. Like were nothing. Useless. But if they didn't have us they'd never have things they value most. It sickens me, but it's my job. Something I wouldn't be anything without. Just a lonely depressed pretty girl, but I guess it would be better than a lonely depressed pretty model.
"Sit down! I don't have all day!" The stylist push down me down in the chair and started putting makeup on me. Not caring if see hurts me. They never do. All they really care about is what you look like and how much you weigh. One pound over eighty and your in trouble. So of course where not healthy. Half the time we don't even look it. But that's what the makeups for.
"Oh my gawd! This is so exciting! My first photo shoot!" The pretty Blonde squealed sitting down on the chair beside me. If only she knew. If only she knew what this does to you. How unhappy it makes you. How depressed. How selfish.
"Ever! Keep over eyes on me!" The stylist yelled at me. Easy for her to say. She obviously doesn't spend every much time looking in the mirror considering how ugly and fat she looked.
"Isn't this so much fun?" The blonde asked me after the stylist went to find me an outfit.
I put on a fake smile, something I learned to do after my many years of modeling. "Sweetie you have no idea." She have me a weird look and turned away. Smart girl.
"This should fit." The stylist brought me and a size 00 pink frilly dress and Stilettos. Of course.
"Thanks." I mumbled taking the clothes and going behind the board to change. I changed really slowly which made them mad.
"Ever Milore! Hurry up! We don't have all day!" I stepped out from behind the board all most looking like my old self. Expect this grin was fake. These clothes are too big and I have less life in me than the plastic plant used for decoration.
"Sorry I'm hurrying!" I yelled trying my best to walk over without tripping in 6 inch heels. The minute I hit the set everyone was on me. Fixing my dress positioning me, telling me what to do. By now I've learned to drown it all out and pretend I'm listening. Just like in life.
"Ever, Ever, haven't you figured out that everyone can see behind that fake smile yet?" My ex-boyfriend, Ace, the photographer said to me.
I scowled I competently hate him. He's one of those guys that hook up with all of the models. Sadly I figured that out the hard way.
"Now now, don't do that! It's bad for your face!" Ace smirked. He was so lucky I was in heels, or I'd wreak that pretty little face of his.
"Shut up!" I yelled.
"Not until we talk."
"Fine then, talk!" I was getting so furious with him.
"After the shoot."
The rest of the Photo shoot was a blur. They dressed but a tons of outfits and took lots of pictures, but all I could think about was what Ace wanted to talk about. It's not like he cares about me, right? No of course not. He only cares about himself. My head told me. That's why I rushed to get out of the studio that night. But I had this strange feeling someone was following me. Up until I got to my car.
"Do you really hate me enough to not even hear what I have to say Ever?" I turned around Ace standing so close to me that I could feel his breath on my face.
"Yes as a matter a fact I do." I went to turn around but he grabbed my arm.
"Ever, please listen." By the look in his eyes I knew he was being sincere.
"Okay fine, what's so important?"
"Don't keep modeling, yes I know your really good. But you could do a lot more with your life. Is it really worth being underweight? How bout depressed?"
"You don't know what your talking about, this is my job! It's all that I have." I was on the verge of tears.
"Is it really? Or have you just been in the industry so long you forgot who you really are?"
"Shut up!" I said running to my car.
The last words I heard from him were "You'll regret it!" And I can't help but wonder, will I?