Disclaimer: No.
In which Pippin Took is frightened by the heights of Men, gets a little bit drunk, and creates a theme song for Hobbits everywhere. [A little songfic-ish, mostly being pointless. Everyone's favourite Hobbits included, but meant to be Pippin centric. Oneshot.
Author's Note: Hey, y'all! This is my first LotR fic, and it's really pointless for one reason: I don't think I know enough to write a "serious" fanfic. I know more than the usual movie-watcher, and could probably be called minorly obsessed, but there are many things that remain unknown to me. But I'm learning! And while I do, I'll have to be satisfied with silly fics like this. It's not very long, but not super short either. It's not going to be the best thing you've ever read, but I don't think it will be too terrible. Either way, please review at the end; I would very much like to know what you guys think!
P.S. Since this does fall under the "genre" of flat out without a point, it's really a bit AU. It wasn't meant to be, but it is because I cannot find a place to set this in the movie. It can not be after or before the movies and books, and I had originally set it in the time the Hobbits were in Bree; but by doing that I totally erase their meeting with Strider, which is kind of important. So I guess that's why it's fanfiction, no?
P.P.S. The song this fic is named after is "Little Bitty" by Alan Jackson (I only repeat the chorus in this fic). Since I am not, never have been, and never will be Alan Jackson, the song doesn't belong to me.
-o0o-
Little Bitty-o0o-
Well,
it's all right to be little bitty;
In a little hometown or a big
ol' city.
Might as well share; might as well smile.
Life goes
on for a little bitty while.
-o0o-
The following fic you are about to read may not make much sense, and it may not be the best written, but I hope it will entertain you for the minutes it will occupy your time. It was not, however, written in ten minutes at a sleepover with my best friend at two in the morning on a sugar high (though at times you may be inclined to think otherwise); it was, in all actuality, written by a bored teenage writer just looking to entertain herself.
This tale begins with a Hobbit, and you know him well. He is not the smartest of Hobbits, nor is he the most famous or accomplished, but he is one of the most pure-hearted (while at the same time obtaining a bit of mischief that can at times make him look foolish), and he has seen and done (or will see and do in the future, anyway) many things that other Hobbits could never imagine seeing or doing.
His name is Peregrin Took, and the world calls him Pippin.
Our tiny hobbit Pippin has just reached, with his three Hobbit companions, a town just outside the Shire called Bree. It was not Hobbit-sized like the Shire; it was built by and for men. Standing outside one of the buildings, Pippin realised something that he had never really acknowledged before: the world outside the Shire was big. Never before had the Hobbit felt so small.
-o0o-
Well, it's all right
to be little bitty;
In a little hometown or a big ol' city.
Might
as well share; might as well smile.
Life goes on for a little
bitty while.
-o0o-
The thought of being stepped on was ever present in Pippin's mind as he walked this way and that, trailing behind Frodo and Sam. "Merry," the little Hobbit squeaked to his friend behind him; "Men aren't subject to crush Hobbits"—here he swallowed fearfully—"are they?"
"Fool," Merry said, and though he did not turn to face him, Pip could just imagine the older hobbit rolling his eyes. "We Hobbits aren't that small, now are we? We come nigh waist high to the Big People. Stop worrying yourself needlessly."
"It's not needlessly," Pippin insisted. "These people are huge!"
This time Pip saw Merry roll his eyes, because he came to walk beside him instead of behind. He gave a long-suffering sigh. "You are very hopeless, my friend."
"I only say what you think." Pippin then ran as fast as his little Hobbit legs would carry him, dodging in between the legs of the Big People, and caught up with Sam and Frodo just in time to reach the place where they were supposed to be staying. But all the time he stared upwards, his head bent as far as his neck would allow, and only the thought of getting a pint of ale at the inn comforted him.
-o0o-
Well, it's all right
to be little bitty;
In a little hometown or a big ol' city.
Might
as well share; might as well smile.
Life goes on for a little
bitty while.
-o0o-
Another pint of ale followed his third, and Pippin began to feel better about his situation. The men seemed to be getting smaller, or maybe he was getting taller. At least he wasn't so paranoid about it, to the great relief of Merry and the others.
"You know what this place needs?" Pippin asked suddenly, after drinking a bit more ale. Whether or not Hobbits are capable of being drunk is uncertain to many, but if it is at all possible, I believe Pippin was so. At his outburst, his three travel-weary companions looked up at him questionably.
"What does it need, Pip?" Merry remarked dryly, both uncaring and uninterested. He held his own pint of ale, but he had not made some move to drink it for some while. The Hobbit was actually rather bored.
"A song!" Pippin put down his pint and stood up, grabbing his friend's arm and pulling him up to stand on the table next to him. "Sing us a song, Frodo!" he ordered of the closest Hobbit sitting down. "Merry and I shall dance to it."
"I am too tired to sing, Pippin," Frodo said, a small smile playing on his lips as he looked at the youngest of the four Hobbits. "Perhaps you shall sing a song of your own to dance to?"
"Perhaps I shall." Pippin's brows furrowed in thought, trying to think of an appropriate song for the occasion. He could not think of one. So his gaze began to wander, where he noticed that even standing on the table the Men were still taller than he. How tiny he felt! How little!
"I got it!" Spinning around, snapping his fingers, in celebration of the thought that had just struck him. Pippin beamed with pride. "I know just the song to sing, but I fear it is only known to I, for it has came from my own mind."
"You don't have a mind, Pip."
Pippin gave Merry a shove in the shoulders, and though the push wasn't strong, Merry took it as permission to sit back down. The younger of the two looked insulted at the other's comment. "If that's the way you feel, perhaps I shall not sing it after all."
"Oh, no, no. Pray sing it for us, Mr. Pippin," Sam inquired, speaking up for the first time that night; looking at him past red-tinted hair and weary eyes.
"All right." And Pippin opened his mouth to sing, and it should come to no surprise to any of you as to what he sung, having already, I'm sure, guessed correctly as to the lyrics.
-o0o-
"Well, it's all
right to be little bitty;
In a little hometown or a big ol'
city.
Might as well share; might as well smile.
Life goes on
for a little bitty while."
-o0o-
There was a moment of stunned silence at the Hobbits' table. Then Frodo laughed, and Merry and Sam along with him. They were making fun, certainly, but not to offend Pippin or hurt his feelings. It was just the natural thing to do: laugh at the young Hobbit for singing such a thing.
Frodo leaned back merrily, wiping tears of mirth from his eyes as he stopped laughing. "That was quite a good way to end the evening," he acknowledged; "I think I'll take my little bitty self off to our room, now."
A round of laughter went around the table again, and though Frodo did actually stand up he didn't leave. Pippin hopped down from standing on the top of the table. "You laugh," he said, "but I am quite fond of it."
"You mistake—our laughter—my friend—" Merry managed between fits of giggles. "I very much enjoyed your little bitty song." His play on words set him off again.
"Begging your pardon, Mr. Frodo, but you look tired." Sam was the first to recover himself and return to thinking sensibly. Or so it had seemed, before he continued. "Perhaps it's time we're off to our little bitty beds?"
The others, after many more a chuckle, heartily agreed and as the four little Hobbits retired to their quarters to sleep, one of them—though it is quite unclear to who, for Pippin's lips were not moving; it is up to you to decide—could be heard muttering words that would become commonly sung, an anthem for all Hobbits of future generations.
-o0o-
Well, it's all right
to be little bitty;
In a little hometown or a big ol' city.
Might
as well share; might as well smile.
Life goes on for a little
bitty while.
-o0o-