A second chance

Marissa closed the door and slumped to the floor where she sat for about a minute. Thoughts were buzzing through her head; memorises of the summer, past year and beyond. So it had got up to this, she thought. No more high school, she was past that now, never to go back. Those times were locked in the past.

This room was her future. She raised her head and looked around a t her new place; there was boxes pilled everywhere-she hadn't meant to pack this much; but as Summer had been helping there hadn't been much chance of travelling light.

She smiled to herself, thinking of her best friend, and how she must be going through a very similar experience right now, but in Los Angeles. She was on the verge of calling her when she decided against it, she didn't want to call home or anything like home, not when she had only just so nearly escaped it.

Julie had almost stopped her coming here, she'd said that she'd be happier if Marissa was nearer home and "why did she want to leave anyway? She was living this 'perfect life', why give that up to live like a student in some tiny apartment; in a location that was hardly Newport Beach."

But then again that was Julie all over Marissa thought to herself, trying to think reasonably; and also unclench her fist. Julie always made her feel like this though: like she wanted kick and slap every inch of that womans body. Now, thank god, she was hundreds of miles away from her, all the way across the country and it would be ages until she next had to lay eyes on her again. With that thought locked firmly in her head she moved from her spot on the floor ready to tackle the immense amount of unpacking before her.

Marissa talked a few boxes until she came to the one with her Cd player in. she plugged into the wall and, hoping there was a CD inside, pressed play. The opening notes of Jeff Buckley's hallelujah filtered through the speakers filling the room. A flood of memories cascaded into Marissa's head, she always skipped this song and hadn't listened to it for ages; it meant too much. She could feel a lump in her throat and tears in her eyes as memory after memory flashed before her eyes. Every note of this song reminded her of Ryan, and how much she wanted him back.

The moments kept on appearing in her head until she was lying on her bed, sobbing.

Ever since that day on the beach she had tried to block him out of her mind completely. She hadn't shared as much as a 'hello' with him since then. Her and Seth had tried to remain friends, as he and Summer was still a couple at his point, but it hadn't exactly worked. When Summer finally broke it off with Seth in the final semester Marissa finally bloked that part of her life off permanently. It had been incredibly hard every time she had seen them 2 together as it reminded her of what her and Ryan had had and how the 4 of them used to be. She had been glad when I had ended with Seth and Summer, (naturally she had never said that) now she could completely move on.

The 2 girls had had a wild time after that. Not necessarily good, but wild. There had been so many drunken nights where she had got with random guys and nothing ever leading anywhere; she wouldn't let it. If falling in love was going to hurt as much as the first time she wasn't letting it happen again.

In that summer her letters arrived from her college applications. Most were saying that she had place and hoped they would see her next semester. Thankfully she had a choice of 3 east coast colleges, which meant as far away from Newport as possible. That was her plan, to escape. On the other hand USC had also offered her a place. Julie had made her apply for it, much to Marissa's distaste. It wasn't that it was bad, but she wanted to get away.

It wouldn't have happened, but, for once, things went well for her. Jimmy and Hailey had returned from Tokyo-married-and helped fight Marissa's case. Somehow, it all worked out, and now she was here, in Boston! She loved her dad so much. She didn't want to think what would have happened if he hadn't shown up. She'd probably be being show around USC right now.

She had been so wrapped up in her thoughts she hadn't realised that the music had stopped; the CD had run straight through. Marissa looked at her watch, it was 4:30. Her dad and Hailey had left at 1:00. She looked around, shed done 5 boxes in like 3 hours; she knew she wouldn't do anymore, well not for the moment anyway so she decided to leave it and go out, get a coffee, maybe meet some people. She took one look at herself in the mirror at her puffy, red eyes and her make-up stained face and decided to get cleaned up before headsing out or she might scare the whole town on first day of being here.

Marissa stepped out of her building into the afternoon sunshine, granted, it was much colder than Newport, but that was what made her smile, it was new and dfferent, nothing like Newport at all. "Maybe I'l meet some real people for once" she thought to herself.

She was walking down to a place 'where' apparently 'everyone hangs out' according to a student hat had shown her around on a previous visit. She hadn't liked her much, she'd been so 'plastic', so 'Newport'. Maybe that was a bit far; but that person was everything she was trying to escape from, she was so tired of putting on a front, shed been doing it for so long and it was wearing her down. The alcohol had numbed it for her and seemed to have made it easier to cope with, but the endless times when she had woken up with her head pounding, trying to remember what she had done the previous night and what it felt like not to feel like this.

She had sub- consciously retreated back inside a bottle ever since, that day. The first time he left she let go, but not this bad. When they'd been together again, only for that short time…no!

Marissa stopped herself. She didn't need to do this to herself. She had locked those thoughts away deep inside her head and mentally thrown away the key. Why had she, after all this time, suddenly gone back to pinning for him? She raised her head to take in her surroundings and realised that she was in an area full of cafes and students.

'This must be the hip, fun place', she thought to herself, without much conviction. She walked into the nearest café. A few pairs of eyes followed her inside as the door swung shut.

"Great, high school all over again." She muttered to herself, without looking up.

"Sorry, what was that again?" a guy said in a bored drawl

It hit her she'd reached the front of the queue. "Oh, sorry, err a latte with a vanilla shot, please"

"Sure, $3.75 please."

She looked up as he said that; his voice sounded familiar.

"Yeah, I'l-Seth! Hey. Wow, this summer changed you!"

"Well, actually, you haven't properly looked at me since you and Ryan- I'll stop now. Hi Marissa." He ended awkwardly.

"Yeah, I suppose, sorry about that" she continued, it wasn't getting any less awkward "well we've all moved on, I guess… so, wait you're going to college here right?"

"Err, pretty much"

"Wow an answer from Seth Cohen with no sarcasm at all. Are you OK?" she asked in mock concern.

"Ha ha ha, funny, well, like you said, we've all moved on. I've changed."

"I never thought I'd-

"Hey, move along, some people would like some coffee, you know!" shouted some random person from the pretty long queue that had now formed behind her.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I should really go, see you around. Oh wait $4.00 right?" as she pulled out some coins.

"3.7-"

"Don't worry about the change"

"Thanks, see ya Marissa"

"Bye"

She took her drink and sat down in a squashy armchair by the window, reliving that strange meeting over in her head.

He was one of the last people she was expecting to hear from, let alone see, any time soon. He seemed to have changed, and she wasn't quite sure how to talk to him. When the 4 of them were friends they'd become pretty close; and now, well should she act like they used to, or should they start over. She'd been so cold to him since her and Ryan had finished-he'd said so himself-would he even want to speak to her?

"Hey, Marissa, are you doing anything now?" Seth was standing there answering her question. Apparently he did still want to speak to her.

"Um, not really, apart from some unpacking, like 50 years of it; but that can wait. Why? What you got in mind?"

"I just got the afternoon off, so I thought we could catch up. Have you been in the town yet?" Marissa shook her head.

"I only just got hear today."

"Well it's totally awesome, there's the hugest comic book store ever!"

Marissa laughed, "Seth Cohen is back! You haven't completely changed then, have you."?

"No, not enough to stop the comic books."

"Ok then lets go, you can show me around this place, I can see all the 'cool places that everyone hangs out at"

"Marissa, was that a joke? Everyone wow Marissa Cooper was being funny" at this point she gave him a look "hey, what you're never joking. It's an achievement, we're all very proud…"

They walked out the café with Seth still talking and Marissa laughing. She was actually having fun, she wasn't pretending, or to out of it to care. Just happy. She hadn't realised how much she'd missed hanging out with him, he was so original and genuinely funny. Marissa was glad that they could go back to being friends; she really needed one right now and was glad it was him that she found.