Chapter 1: Those who should mourn, shall not.

Note: This fanfic is dedicated to Charles RB on the PPMB; who dared to shout Jake. Also to Teenracer6; also on the PPMB, who bravely beta read it.

A prattle could be heard from down the hall of the Morgendorffer's home. It was the sound of people comforting each other after losing a loved one.

Tom Sloane had walked up the stairs of the house and found his way to a room that felt familiar, but part of him he felt he shouldn't enter.

It was the room of his high school girlfriend Daria Morgendorffer. A room he had not been in for years; a room with both pleasant and unpleasant memories. Tom walked to the padded walls and felt them; the questions of why he was in this room had eluded him. Perhaps he was just avoiding the crowds forming downstairs. He instead placed his head against the walls and found tears had begun to stream down his cheeks.

"Tom, shouldn't I be the one doing that?" Came a monotone voice form behind. He turned quickly to see a sigh that was both a relief and a horror.

"Daria." He responded in a somewhat disgusted voice.

"Good to know you're glad to see me."

"Daria I-" He felt her hand touch his shoulder.

"I know; thanks for coming." Much to Tom's surprise she embraced him. It's not that she never hugged him when they dated; they where just never a very affectionate couple. Of course he returned her gesture, he knew it was purely platonic. They soon let go of each other and sat together on the bed.

"Jane didn't come?" Tom asked.

"She came; she's downstairs observing the crowd. I told her I needed time alone."

"Oh, sorry for getting in the way of that."

"It's fine; I think I need to talk to someone other than Jane."

"Why?"

"Because; in a sense, Jane's lost her mother too." That's right; The Morgendorffer's are the closest Jane has ever had to a stable family. "She's too attached. I need someone - someone who is both attached and yet at a distance."

"Is that so?" Daria just nodded. "Then I'm proud to be you're other; not as close, shoulder to cry on."

"Yeah."

"What did you want to talk about?"

"I think I should feel worse." Tom just remained silent. "I've been thinking about how in high school; this jerk name Tommy Sherman died shortly after Jane made a joke about how he wouldn't live long. He wasn't a big enough jerk that he deserved it, but he was an asshole to everyone he came across and after he died everyone acted like he was their friend."

"People do that because-"

"I know; I talked about that with Jane. That's not it. When I was downstairs people walked up to me and told me what a wonderful person my mother was."

"And you don't think she was?"

"Maybe not wonderful, but she was good. Not the best, but-" She paused for a brief moment. "I never told her this, but if I had to choose a mother; I'd probably have chosen her."

"So what happened?"

"Well it wasn't that they said she was wonderful; it was how they said it." She sighed. "Mom's secretary; Marianne, told me she was a great mother, but I know for a fact she thinks my mom was far to obsessed with achieving at work to be a great mother. Eric told me she was a wonderful wife and that he feels bad for my dad, but I know he wanted my mom for himself and hated my dad; even after she made a complete fool of him when she threatened to sue and they hadn't talked for awhile after she became a full partner." Daria looked away. "And even Linda Griffin came up to me and told me my mother's death was a tragedy even though she hated my mother." Daria sighed. "She was only here because Quinn is her daughter Sandi's friend and Sandi couldn't make it to send her condolences herself."

"You're mad because they aren't being honest." Tom said, he felt sick for doing it but he smirked. "Sounds like you're being the Daria we all know and love."

"Don't you mean tolerate?" She responded with a small smirk of her own crossing her face. "But no; I'm upset because I wish for one brief moment I could stop being Daria Morgendorffer. I'm mad because I'm getting mad at them for being polite; for complimenting my dead mother."

"I don't think your mother would want that. When it all comes down to it I think she was quite fond of Daria Morgendorffer and would hate it if she wasn't at her funeral."

"Really." Daria stated, she wasn't asking because she knew Tom was right.

"Yeah." Tom said well putting his arm around his friend.

"Great, you two are getting it on now?" Came a voice that sounded just a bit tipsy.

"Jane, are you drunk?" Daria asked, a slight hint of anger in her voice.

"Hey your dad and Rita are way drunker than me."

"Great they found the alcohol." Daria said as she got up and rushed past Jane to stop her father and aunt from getting themselves wasted.

"It was supposed to be hidden?" Jane asked; her voice somewhat slurred, before look back a Tom with a strange grin. She then walked after Daria leaving Tom alone in Daria's room.

He wondered if he should go downstairs, just staying in Daria's old room was kind of rude. Instead he found his eyes wandering around the room. It was exactly the same as it had been when Daria left for college; that was three years ago. He knew because he helped Jane and Daria pack up for the big move.

He wondered if Jake left it that way; Daria's father always seemed to have a certain amount of favoritism toward his eldest daughter that anyone in their right mind could see. Well anyone except Daria, who never seemed to notice her father's pet name or his penchant for trusting her. Yes, Jake seemed to believe the future of the Morgendorffer family rested solely on Daria.

His thoughts shifted to the time her visited the Morgendorffer's for dinner. The time when he and Jake caught that squirrel with that other kid, then they went go carting. Yeah, the joy in Jake Morgendorffer's eyes. That joy, would he never see it again.

Why am I think like that? Tom shook his head. Jake…

Just then; as if reading his thoughts, the voice of Jake came from the doorway. He didn't look that much older, a bit of grey in his hair, but otherwise the same Jake Tom had seen on the day before he left for college. "Hey there Tom." He sounded slurred. He was definitely drunk. He came can sat beside Tom.

"Mr. Morgendorffer, I'm sorry about your wife. "

"It's okay Tom, she died happy." Jake said with a big smile on his face.

How much has he had to drink? "Sir, are you feeling okay?"

"I'm fine; you see Tom, Helen told me something - she said Jakey don't go flying off the handle when I die; the girls are going to need you. I want you to promise me you're not going to break down, you're gonna keep going." His smile turned to a frown as tears welled up in his eyes. "and that's what I'm gonna do. You know - I thought I'd go first. Cancer suck…"

"A bit of an understatement sir."

"I know. Helen told me, move on Jake. Be happy Jakey - but what if Jakey doesn't wanna be happy damnit." Jake didn't seem to be able to muster his usual angry rant and it just tapered off before it really began.

"Why don't you talk to Daria, she's looking for you."

"Daria's strong, she doesn't need her old man and I don't want to bother her. You know I thought I'd be the first to go."

"You said that."

"Yeah I know." He stared at Tom for a minute before grabbing him and kissing him. It wasn't a kiss on the cheek or a peck, but a long, deep kiss. Tom could taste Jake's breath. A residue of beverages he had been drinking, most certainly he had more than one type of alcohol. Tom embraced him for reasons he himself didn't know. He could feel his body reacting to the wonderful sensations Jake was bringing to him.

After a minute or two he opened his eyes and pushed away. Staring at the older man Tom stood up. Both had expressions of utter mortification splashed across their faces.

"I- I need to go." Tom rushed out the door and suddenly found himself falling into a black pit. He had no idea what was going on, but he could make out the faces of Daria, Jane, Quinn, and Helen staring at him in the shadows with shame upon their faces. "Thomas!" He heard.

Tom shot up and looked around. He was in his bedroom. He could still feel the kiss on his lips. The kiss.

It is now summer vacation. It had been a few months since that. He'd avoided Jake Morgendorffer about as well as someone who is friends with a mans daughter could. Tom thought of this as he drove to his parents instead of to a beach or even better an airport. This only drudged up memories of Helen's funeral and the time everyone gathered at their house.

"Thomas!" A voice cried out.. Tom turned and saw a young women with long black hair and green eyes staring at him. She was dressed in a simple white t-shirt and blue jeans, with of cheap sunglasses on her forehead. "Pay attention to the road, you almost missed our turn."

"Sorry, just tired is all."

"I swear Mr. Sloane; Grace, Sloane, and Page is screwed with you on the job." The girl was Margret Page, daughter of one of his fathers partners and all around pain in Tom's ass. She was also his sister's best friend. The kind of person he was forced to like; although honestly he didn't mind her as much as he let on, her sister was unbearable though. He was thankful she wasn't there as she went to school overseas.

"Well forgive me Ms. Page; I was under the impression your wisdom and maturity would guide us into the future."

The girl just raised her nose with false arrogance. "Well no women is an island. I most certainly can't rely on that snob Alexander Grace, my sister is a flake, and Elsie has no interest in following tradition. As you can see, you are my only hope young Thomas."

"I appreciate your faith in me and what is with the young crap, you're two years younger than me. You should show me some respect."

"Earn it; I've never kissed a girl's best friend behind her back and I think someone who has loses some respect." Tom just glared at her. His sister had told her about it in confidence and well it was a well guarded secret - one she rubbed in his face.

"Speaking of that, planning to come out to daddy anytime soon."

"D-don't twist my words!" She said in a panic. "I kissed Elsie once. I was just curious - I am not like that!"

"Like that? I can't believe you're homophobic. I thought you had a friend who was a lesbian. It's always the people who seem most tolerant."

"I -I never said that! You're twisting everything I say!"

"You make it easy."

"Stop using me as a proxy for Elsie."

"Can't help it, with her out of the country I'm afraid I've been so lonely."

Tom grinned as he noticed she was biting her bottom lip. She always tried to act mature, but she was since she was childish it fell apart quickly.

"Anyway you still act like you're in high school."

"Jerk."

"That was me being nice."

"I should have taken time away before going to college like Elsie."

"Or you could have forgone college; nay, society altogether to become a hermit."

They drove on for awhile longer, every so often Margret would hint she wanted to know how long they would have to go. Soon they pulled in front of an old looking building that appeared to be falling apart.

"Where are we?"

"I told you I have to stop by a friend of mines house. She's going to be in town soon and I'm just picking something up for her."

"Is this place condemned?"

"Nope, although it probably should be." He honked the horn once.

"Why can't she get it herself?"

"She's avoiding her eldest brother, he just got divorced for the - you know what it's not any of your business."

"Sounds like a real stable family."

"I hope he's not asleep."

"Who?"

"Trent, he's Jane's older brother."

"Oh Jane, the artist girl you snuck around on!" She said with glowing eyes.

"The one and only and I wasn't sneaking around on her."

"She's the one who painted that painting you let me have."

Tom looked around nervously. "Let's not talk about that."

"The one where she was a tiger and was eating your heart."

"It was a sign of forgiveness, or a sign she's secretly plotting to kill me."

"She has a brother? Is he an artist too?"

"A musician; well when he's awake, so about an hour a day."

As he said this Trent knocked on his car window. Margret's face turned bright red.

"Hey Trent, I'm here to pick up the stuff Jane asked for."

"Oh yeah that."

"You know what I'm talking about - right?"

"Yeah. She said she'd have gotten it herself except Wind's staying over and it's far from pretty, sorry about this man."

"Hey it's alright. I was already passing through and I just have to drop it off at Daria's." Tom found himself blushing a little as the thought of Jake entered his mind.

"Hey, who are you?" Trent asked pointing at Margret. She just squeaked. "Awesome noise. Can you play any instruments?" Margret just squeaked again.

"How's the band Trent?"

Trent's eyes seemed to shift a little. "Yeah - well." He coughed a bit and smiled. "We're cool."

"That's great!"

Tom didn't notice the hint of dread hidden deep within' Trent's eyes.

"Hey kiddo, how's college life?"

"The same as it's been for the past three years dad. The same as yesterday, the same as a week ago; trust me it's all very boring. We thought someone was going to shoot up the place, but the police managed to drag him away."

"Is everyone okay!"

"I'm just kidding dad. It's really boring in the good, not overly irritating way."

Daria was on the phone with her father, ever since her mother died Quinn and her had taken to calling him every day. She was shocked he was holding up so well but still thought she and Jane should head down there to visit him for summer vacation.

"And how is Jane doing?" He asked cheerfully.

"She's great, BFAC has really help her refine her skills." There was something bothering Daria, but she couldn't quite put her finger on it.

"And your roommate Karen."

"Visiting her family; listen dad, A few days ago I mentioned Tom would be up with some of Jane's stuff right." Jake didn't reply. "When I mentioned that you acted oddly; well more oddly than usual. What's going on?"

"Kiddo I have to go, I think your friend Tom's here. I should go help him." His voice sounded like it was cracking under pressure.

"Dad?" He had already hung up on her. He's hiding something, but what? With that she made up her mind, she would get to the bottom of whatever her father was keeping from her. She had to know what was bothering him.

Tom stood out front of the door with a box; he hadn't looked inside so he wasn't sure what it was. Margret hit the door bell. "I hope he hurries, I need to use the bathroom."

After a minute the door to the Morgendorffer's opened bringing the young man eye to eye with older man for the first time since the funeral. They stood silently gazing at each other for awhile, neither sure what to say. The silence was broken however with a simple question.

"May I use your bathroom?" Margret said with a bright smile.

"Huh, oh yeah. It's right through there, you can't miss it." Jake said; pointing to the general area of the bathroom.

"Thank you sir." She said with a nod as she walked by Jake. Tom noticed the moment she was out of Jake's sight she ran to the bathroom. His eyes quickly returned to the older man's.

"So~ your girlfriend?" Jake asked nervously.

Tom just stared at him. What was it? Why did he feel this way? He felt himself blush and he feverously stumbled through the answer. "No - she's a Page. I mean she's my sister's Page. I mean she's my sister's best friend named Margret Page. I mean-" He thought about it for a moment. "No that last one was right." He grinned. "I sound stupid." Crap, I said that out loud.

"That's alright, I sound like that all the time. Come on in."

Tom sheepishly entered the house and Jake guided him to the living room where he placed the box on the coffee table.

"Mr. Morgendorffer." Tom said with a nod. "I - I'll be out of your hair in-" Jake pulled the young man close and passionately kissed him. Tom was caught in the moment, but soon found himself struggling to get away.

"What the hell are you doing that for! Your wife just died and you're making out with your daughters ex-boyfriend."

"I don't know. I just- I just find myself thinking about you Tom." Jake said nervously.

"You find yourself thinking about me?" Tom stopped to think. He felt it to. Why though? What could possibly attract him to Jake Morgendorffer. Even as he was thinking it he found himself embracing the man, lip locked in passion.

"I'm still young-" Tom choked out in between kisses. He managed to pull away and fell to the couch.

"I'll teach you." Jake said hovering over the boy. They smiled at each other taking in the moment, both unsure as to why they wanted it so much.

"Okay Tom, sorry I took so." The girl stared on mortified as she saw Tom's lips touching against Jake's now bared chest. "What the hell-"

Tom's eyes raised in shock to the girl. He stood to his feet, his pants feel around his ankle and looked for his jacket. "I - I can explain this." He fixed his pants and dashed out the door without his jacket.

Margret looked at Jake; his eyes seemed lost, confused, and above all lonely. She found herself turning away and dashing after Tom.

"Tom wait." She called to him as she stepped outside.

"Get in the car Margret." Tom said calmly as he opened the drivers side door.

"But Tom, what-"

"Get in the damn car." He yelled as he slammed his door.

Tom wasn't the yelling type normally so Margret was a little nervous, but did as she was told. They just sat there in the car not talking, but not moving either.

"I think given the circumstances I have every right to know what was going on in there." She said trying to remain calm.

"Shut up." Tom said, his voice cracking, he was nearly in tears. He took a deep breath and finally drove the car away. "Margret, I'm asking you this as-" He couldn't say friend, she wasn't his friend. He just shook his head. "Tell no one what just happened. I almost ruined Daria's life back in high school, I'm sure as hell not going to screw up her life any more than that. Everything is good now - I wanna keep it that way."

"Oh."

"I don't - I don't know why I'm feeling this way, but if I ignore it then it'll go away."

Margret sighed, the Sloane Family Motto. Repress, move on, forget. "Okay Tom."

"Not even Elsie!" He snapped. She just nodded in agreement.

After a few minute Tom added an "I'm sorry." Margret just nodded to that to. She'd be home soon anyway, then she could put this strange day behind her.

They soon pulled up to the Sloane's and Tom got out of the car. A sense of uneasiness still floated in the air.

…To be continued