Summary: The GoGoRiki DHMIS Crossover version of Spongebob Squarepants', "Love That Squid".
GoGoRiki (c) Fun Games Media
Don't Hug Me I'm Scared (c) Becky and Joe
OCs (c) me
Wooliriki: Excuse me, a rose for the lady please.
Pogoriki: Try reading the sign, Casanova.
[Wooliriki tries to read the sign, but he can't]
Rosariki: You never learned to read, did you?
Wooliriki: [sulks] No.
Rosariki: That's all right, neither did I!
Wooliriki: We were meant for each other! [they walk away happily]
Pogoriki: [sighs] Even the illiterate find love. [takes out a book] Oh, Pogoriki, why are you torturing yourself with tales of romance? [tosses the book away and it lands in Pogalinariki's eye]
Pogalinariki: [takes the book out of her eye] Hey, Onichan! [puts the book on her tongue] You've dropped your book!
Pogoriki: That's no "book". That's just a cruel reminder that I'm single, and will likely be that way forever.
Pogalinariki: C'mon, Onichan. Turn that frown upside down! [flips Pogoriki's head]
Pogoriki: I like my frowns in their regular orientation. [flips his head back to normal]
Pogalinariki: [jumps in front of Pogoriki] Just remember, Onichan. You've never experienced true love. BUT, that doesn't mean you'll never find it! You know the saying: There's a creature for every pot!
Pogoriki: Great, let the tired cliches cascade foward. [sarcastically] That'll make me feel better.
[Paige the Notepad walks inside and Pogoriki gasps]
Pogoriki: [bashes into Pogalinariki and picks her up as he looks at her] Who-who is that? She's got da-da-da-da-da... [melts] She's, wow!
Paige: I absolutely adore the decor! Exquisitely minimalist!
Pogoriki: [gasps] She speaks art jargon!
Paige: What captive wonders does this menu hold?
Pogoriki: Pogalina, she's got it all! Class, style, grace, and looks like yours truely!
Pogalinariki: Then why don't you ask her out on one of those dates you keep talking about?
Pogoriki: My next move exactly! Observe the old paws and all of its glory! [tries to speak to her, but becomes nervous]
Paige: Is that British?
Pogalinariki: Boy, you were fluffing up there!
Pogoriki: Sis, I don't know what I'm doing! I've never felt like this before.
Pogalinariki: Onichan, you've been bitten by the love bug!
Paige: Hello, hello? I'd like to place an order.
Pogoriki: She's talking to me. What do I do?
Paige: Well, if nobody's going to take my order, I'll just have to go get some flowers elsewhere. [begins to leave]
Pogoriki: [gasps] She's leaving!
Pogalinariki: Oh no shes not! Hang on bro! [cranks up the bike and it moves in front of Paige]
Paige: Finally, some service around here.
Pogoriki: Hi.
Paige: Are you okay?
Pogoriki: How about a date?
Paige: See you at 8: 00, Pogo. [walks away. Pogoriki floats away and Pogalinariki grabs him]
Pogalinariki: You okay, Onichan. You froze up there.
Pogoriki: [Head is in a block of ice, which breaks] What do you mean?
Pogalinariki: I mean, when was the last time you went out on a date?
Pogoriki: [remembers his last date] Pogalina, you've gotta help me! It's been so long! What do I do?
Pogalinariki: You my twin brother are in desprate need of a practise date.
Pogoriki: That's it! I'll go on... [voice quiets down] a practice date?
Pogalinariki: Just meet me at my house at 5: 00, Onichan.
[Fading transition to Pogalinariki's house. Pogoriki rings the doorbell]
Pogalinariki: [high-pitched voice] Just one minute, Pogo-chan!
Pogoriki: [sulks a little a look at his watch] Sometime today would be nice.
Pogalinariki: [dressed as Human!Paige/Notepad. High-pitched voice] I'm ready!
Pogoriki: [screams] Dear goodness!
Pogalinariki: Oh! [smacks her ears, making them lower, and tilts them down] Missed a spot! [regular voice] Aren't you going to compliment my outfit?
Pogoriki: Um...You look...stunning?
Pogalinariki: [high-pitched voice] Oh, you're so sweet! Where are my flowers?
Pogoriki: What! Oh! Um. Did you drop your lip balm!
Pogalinariki: [looks down as Pogoriki buys some flowers] I don't think I've dropped anything... Ooh! You shouldn't have.
Pogoriki. Oh, but I wanted to!
Pogalinariki: No, you really shouldn't have. It's just that I'm very... I'm very aller... ACHOOO! [sneezes on Squidward] ...very allergic to tulips. I prefer roses So, are you ready to go?
Pogoriki: Go where?
Pogalinariki: To dinner, silly.
Pogoriki: Oh, right! I'll get my car. [arrives with his car] Hop in! [Pogalinariki clears her throat] What?
Pogalinariki: [regular voice] A gentlemen always opens a door for a lady.
Pogoriki: [opens the door] Oh, where are my manners!? [Pogalinariki gets in, and Pogoriki buckles his seatbelt] Alrightie. [Pogalinariki is struggling with her seatbelt] Can I help you with that?
Pogalinariki: No, no, I've got it!
Pogoriki: [takes the seatbelt and buckles it] There!
Pogalinariki: Ah, snug.
Pogoriki: Can we go now?
Pogalinariki: Yes.
Pogoriki: Good.
Pogalinariki: Right after I tinkle. [unbuckles seatbelt, walks inside, and rings a bell before returning to the car]
Pogoriki: Can we go now?
Pogalinariki: Great, I know a fabulous place! Just head this way.
Pogoriki: Okay.
Pogalinariki: At that stop sign make a right.
Pogoriki: Alright.
Pogalinariki: At that stoplight make a right.
Pogoriki: Gotcha.
Pogoriki: At this street here make a right. At this intersection make a right, and park at the yellow and pink building up ahead. Ooh! We're here!
Pogoriki: You're a real piece of work, you know that?
Pogalinariki: Why thank you, Mr. Pogo-chan! [regular voice] Way to compliment the date, Onichan.
[Fading transition]
Pogalinariki: Now, it's the chit-chat part of the date. Amuse her with an interesting conversation.
Pogoriki: Um. Can you believe all this weather we're having?
Pogalinariki: Good start, but let's try something interesting. Maybe she would want to talk about her day for example, she might want to being up her promation for a job at work, her experiences with a baby robot, or how she just couldn't decide what to wear!
Chikoriki: Dinner is served. [gives Pogalinariki and Pogoriki a plate of meatloaf. to Pogoriki] Don't try to eat it. It's burnt.
Pogalinariki: This is the perfect opportunity to work on your table etiquette.
Pogalinariki: [female voice] Squidward, could you please pass the potato chips? [Pogoriki tries to pass the chips, but Chikoriki gives it to her]
Chikoriki: Here you go, ma'am!
Pogalinariki: Why, thank you, sir!
Chikoriki: Hey, Pogo, who's the lovely lady? I think she's giving me the cutesy eye!
Pogoriki: Oh, no you don't, Chiko! Pogalina and I are in the middle of a practice date!
Chikoriki: [to Pogalinariki] So, do you hang out here often?
Pogalinariki: [giggles] Well, this is my brother's home, silly.
Pogoriki: Excuse me, but how is this supposed to help me with my real date? [looks at watch] Which, by the way begins in five minutes. [walks down stairs]
Pogalinariki: [regular voice] Onichan, wait! We haven't covered...[gets lipstick] We haven't covered all the tenants of Dating 101 yet! [trips and falls downstairs, and bumps into Pogoriki, causing his ears to get stuck in the door] So, as I was saying... I, I would like to go over just a few more crucial aspects of the first date. [The door melts off Pogoriki, who becomes angry] Such as...
[Pogoriki shushes Pogalinariki]
Pogoriki: Pogalina! Would you please just shut it and leave me alone?
Pogoriki: Um, Pogo-chan..
Pogoriki: Don't "um, Pogo-chan" me, you, you annoying, insignificant, waste of my time!
Pogalinariki: Um, Onichan.
Pogoriki: Don't interrupt me! And don't call me, look at me, write me, or even think of me! Cause you and I, we are not friends nor siblings! And never will be.
Pogalinariki: Does this mean there won't be a second date?
[Pogoriki storms off until Paige was here]
Pogoriki: Um, you just saw that.
Paige: Oh just all of it.
Pogoriki: And you probably think I'm a mean, spirited brute, which is the exact opposite of what you were expecting, right?
Paige: Not exactly.
Pogoriki: Huh?
Paige: I think a guy who is insane is totally dreamy. Let's go eat!
Pogoriki: Sis, I'm dreamy!
[Paige pulls Pogoriki away so they can go eat]
Pogalinariki: Have fun you two, oh Pogalinariki your work here is done.
Chikoriki: Not quite, Pogalina, I was promised a movie, and some buttered popcorn.