Chapter 1
I made sure that Charlie had stopped yelling before I looked up. Telling him the news…wasn't the best idea. Edward sat beside me, clutching my hand with his cold, marble fingers.
"This was your idea, wasn't it Cullen?" Charlie snarled. He wasn't shouting any longer but the resentment in his voice was clear.
"I take full responsibility." Edward said. His lips pressed tight together and I could see his eyes dark but controlled against his perfect features.
"MARRIAGE?" Charlie yelled. I winced. "THIS WAS THE SAME MISTAKE I MADE! BELLA, CAN'T YOU SEE WHAT YOU'RE DOING? I won't allow it." He finished with a sigh.
"Char-…Dad," I had to start somewhere. "This is my decision. You can go against what We're saying or you can approve. You know I can make my own decisions. I'm moving out soon anyway but I'd rather not do it because you can't stand me anymore." I stifled a sob.
I felt Edward go stiff. He was staring into space and I had a guess to what he was doing; reading Charlie's mind to find a way to soften him up.
"If I may sir," Edward began,
"You may not." Charlie interrupted. Edward disregarded this.
"I'm sorry that this is such a shock to you." Charlie snorted. "I believe that you are right. I was wrong to leave Bella. Jacob was there for her when I wasn't. I know I hurt her and I spend every day wishing I could take it back. I think you of all people would understand the longing to protect her. I offer you a chance to forgive me, something that I could never do. I respect your wishes Sir, but I think that we should be able to make our own decisions."
Charlie closed his eyes and sighed. I took this chance to steal a glance at Edward. After so long, I could never get used to his beauty. The pale skin, the square jaw, the golden eyes and his bronze hair. I shifted myself closer to him and he put his arm around my shoulder. He gave a reassuring nod and we both turned to face Charlie.
I never wanted this. I knew the time would come when we would of course have to tell Charlie about the engagement and I knew he wouldn't be pleased but the afternoon was the hardest I've ever been through. We had been arguing for a solid hour now though it seemed longer than that. We delayed telling him, there were only 2 weeks until the big day, as Alice had said. I jumped when I realised that Charlie had begun to talk.
"I can see…that I'm not going to change your mind." Charlie looked at me.
"I'm sorry dad." I whispered. Edward gave me a small squeeze.
"Very well then. I don't approve but I guess I have no other choice than to accept what you're saying." Charlie sighed. He got up and walked out the front door without looking back. I heard his police cruiser start up and he drove away.
I stood up, as if to follow him but Edward was grabbed my arm. I turned to look at him. He seemed to be considering what to say. I knew he was longing to be able to read my mind at that point; it had always bothered him that I was the only one he couldn't understand completely. Edward stood up and pressed me against his stone cold chest. I began to cry. He lifted my face in his and kissed me softly. I had never gotten used to his careful perfection. He let me go and cradled me and started to sway with me in his arms. He started to hum my lullaby carefully in my ear. This was even worse than what happened between Jacob and me. The cold look echoed through my mind, the same look my father had given me before. I was nervous about my wedding. Though Alice was planning it, I was still shocked at how much had changed in the past year. Me engaged? It just was strange. Especially when you added Edward to the picture. Engaged to perfection. The thought still made my heart race. And what about the Volturi? They would surely check to make sure that I was a vampire someday. Edward had been trying to convince me to wait a year so we could spend a little bit of time together before I was a newborn vampire. He wanted a good marriage and I also thought that my maddening thirst for blood might not help the situation. Jacob still wasn't talking to me. Though he had saved me when Edward left, I could tell that he was no longer the same person. I wasn't sure if I could handle being around him anymore. The fact that my old best friend and fiancé were enemies was the reason. Also, Jacob couldn't understand that we couldn't be together. Until he learned that, there was no point in trying to push him into just friendship. I sighed involuntarily.
Edward noticed of course.
"Everything will work out." He grinned my favourite crooked smile and kissed my forehead. He always told me he couldn't read my mind but sometimes, I thought that he could. The understanding in his voice was the tonic that I needed. He slowly steered me towards the door and I willingly followed.
"Where are we going?" I asked.
"The meadow?" he suggested. I nodded, we hadn't been in a while. "You want to bring Alice too?" he asked. Again, I nodded.
He opened to passenger door of his silver Volvo and I stepped in. We drove to the Cullen's in silence, picked up Alice and started driving towards the trail. Charlie didn't object to hiking anymore since the giant wolves were still absent from our area. I smirked as I remembered them. They saved my life a while ago actually.
"What's the matter Bella?" Alice asked. I rolled my eyes.
"As if you didn't see it coming." I muttered.
"I saw you telling Charlie and I saw him get a little angry. It wouldn't have helped, you knew it was coming anyway." Alice said with a shrug. Her gift at seeing glimpses of the future was annoying sometimes.
"Relax Bella, love. He'll realise that this wasn't a bad decision after all." Edward said. "He's cooling down right now."
"Where is he?" I asked.
"Down at La Push talking to Billy." Edward said after a minute.
"They gossip like old women." I said smugly. Edward smiled.
"Do you see what Jacob's doing?" I couldn't help asking. Edward became silent for a minute.
"He's with Sam and Seth right now." He replied.
"Doing what?"
"They're trying to make him talk about it. Apparently he's been really separate from the group lately, muttering to himself and what not."
I could tell that he wished he hadn't told me that. Edward knew that I always found the subject of Jake's depression my depression. He gave me a one armed squeeze. There were a couple minutes of silence then Alice started humming to herself, twisting her fingers around in her short black hair.
"We're here." Edward said suddenly. I snapped out of my thoughts about Jacob and stepped out of the car. Routinely, I climbed onto Edward's back with ease.
"Ready?" he asked me, smiling crookedly sideways. Alice laughed.
"As I'll ever be." I sighed. Knowing I'd thank myself for it later on, I ducked my head into his back, shielding my eyes. A second of silence then I felt him accelerate, gliding through the trees at an impossible speed. It was one of my favourites of his vampire skills. I would never forget, no matter how long I lived the feeling of being on his back, flying through the bush. I was used to it but my heart still raced as if I was running too. Though Alice and Edward didn't even break a sweat. He stopped smoothly and I opened my eyes. We were at the beautiful meadow. It was just as I had remembered. Perfectly round and small with wildflowers and soft, swaying grass. It was a bit of a dull day so the Cullens didn't glitter in the sun the way I remembered, my first time here with Edward. I remembered what he looked like though. It was as if there were thousands of diamonds all over his skin. It was breathtaking.
We spread around on the grass. Alice was lying down staring at the sky. Edward sat with his legs open and I sat between them, resting my head on his chest. He supported me with ease. Another vampire benefit.
"So how's the wedding plans going Alice?" Edward asked. I elbowed him playfully in the stomach but regretted it when I remembered that he was as hard as rock. He chuckled and started to rub my arm.
"Pretty good." Alice said.
"I can't wait to see what you have planned." Edward said.
"I'm not giving anything away. It's going to be a surprise." She said.
"Hmm…" Edward was staring off in space.
"That's cheating!" Alice shrieked. I realised he was reading her mind, trying to see what she had planned.
"Alright. I'll wait." He gave in.
"If it helps any, Bella, I saw your reaction and even you were excited." Alice said.
I decided to be nice. Saying my true feelings about how she better not go overboard with this was tempting but I knew I would hurt her feelings. I pulled a smile on looked at her. I was careful in what I said, trying not to lie.
"I know it's going to be…a night to remember Alice." I said. Edward kissed my cheek and I closed my eyes and leaned back against him, taking in the delicious aroma that he was. Perfection; I didn't deserve it one bit. Edward had convinced me to wear the ring, to prove to Charlie that we weren't pulling some cruel practical joke. I twisted it on my finger, unable to take in the significance of it. I sighed. Edward only agreed to change me into a vampire himself if I married him first. He also has some other requests, such as a new car and college money. He hadn't forgotten my request though. He promised that we would try to go across the boundaries he had so carefully constructed after we were married. Butterflies went through my stomach. I wondered if I ever would stop getting so nervous around him. Even thinking about him made my heart pound.
"You should be happy Bella." Alice said.
"Why?" I asked stupidly.
"You're getting married! Does that mean nothing to you?" she asked, surprised. Edward stiffened, as if afraid of my response.
"I am. I can't wait. I'm just worried about other things." I said.
"Don't worry about the Volturi." Alice reminded me.
"And don't worry about Jacob either." Edward said.
"You don't even have to worry about Victoria anymore!" Alice said.
"Or Charlie." Edward added. I continued to sit still, biting my lip.
"Honestly Isabella Swan! I give up!" Alice threw her hands up dramatically and fell to the grass again.
"Listen Bella. Victoria is gone. The Volturi won't think t show up for years and by the time they do, you'll probably be a vampire by then. Jacob will come around and see that you can't love him anymore. Charlie will accept us together finally. And we're together. Everything is fine." Edward said.
"Are you sure you can't read my mind?" I asked. Edward laughed.
"I wish. There's so much more about you that I want to understand." He sighed.
"Like what?" Alice and I asked at the same time. Edward smirked.
"What's bothering you, what I can do to make it better, your fears and your dismay." He said. "Things like that."
I wrapped my arms more securely around his.
"You're right. There's nothing to worry about really. And I'm glad you can't read my mind. Half the stuff I was thinking would make me die of embarrassment if you heard." I said.
"Example please?" he asked with curious innocence. I could feel him suppress a grin.
"Not a chance." I said. Alice sat up and pouted with protest.
"Please?" he whispered in my ear. How did he do that?
"Fine." I said. I could feel their eyes on me. "Let me think…" There was so much I was thinking about. "Okay. Well when you proposed I sort of imagined us and there was an Anne of Green Gables theme sort of. Us sitting on a rocking bench, swaying, talking…" I shrugged and then blushed furiously.
Edward laughed but it wasn't a cruel laugh. It was like he had been imagining the same thing; a coincidence laugh sort of.
"In time. I can't promise you a house in the country but I promise that I will try to be everything you ever wanted a husband to be. I'll be there and never leave you Love." Edward said. I looked up at him backwards. We faced each other and he kissed me lightly, his cold lips moving with mine perfectly. Perfection. Alice meanwhile was making retching noises in the background. We broke apart and everyone started laughing. Edward was right. Our dreams were going to come true one day and we'd be together forever. I pushed aside the one major thought that was going through my mind. The one that haunted me daily. Would we ever get that life if I loved blood more than him?