It was a hard birth. No one expected any of us of to live. But we did. Two of us did. My mother, Flamestar, and I Mapleshine. My brother Gingerkit died.
Gingerkit wasn't supposed to die. I was. I can't do anything right. I tried to be a warrior but I just wasn't fast enough to catch prey. I ended up ending Briarpaw's life when I couldn't fight.
I tried being a medicine cat but I couldn't ever remember a single name and its use. Treebark, the medicine cat told me it would come in time. It didn't. I don't know why they made me a warrior. I didn't deserve it. I didn't deserve a life, Gingerkit did. No one wants me as a mate. I am useless. So now, standing on the tallest branch of the tree, I don't want you to think it is your fault that I am ending my life. I am ending it because I need to. To spare you the pain. I don't want to bring down the clan. I am destroying it, no matter what you say when you try to protest. I am doing this because I love you. You shouldn't have to go through this. You were the only one who tried to help me, Bramblefur. I loved you, and I thought you loved me too. But then you went and became mates with Iceflower. So I guess in some ways you are responsible for my death. But mostly I am helping the clans. So when you find my broken body, try to understand why I did this. So now, I guess it is goodbye as I am jumping and closing my eyes as I fall. Falling towards earth to save you. To save you all. One thing you didn't know though. I was expecting your kits.