Disclaimer: I don't own crap. Don't sue me. You'll come away empty-handed.
My second chapter fic! Yay! I'ma be annoying and put up a song first to set the tone of this one. It's RikuSora, sorta SoKairi (you can't just pretend she doesn't exist, you know!), but it WILL end RikuSora. So, if you don't like that idea, flame me all you want. I really don't give a damn. I'm bi myself and see absolutely nothing wrong with same-sex relationships. XP But, other people do, and that's a part of this fic. Maybe I should've named it 'Acceptance'. Oh well.
Uh, first chapters are always boring. Lots of explaining to do. Or maybe it's just my style. Still, they're necessary to read, or you'll be lost throughout the rest of the fic.
Anyways, if you've read any of my previous works, you know I'm addicted to music. I pulled my old Goo Goo Dolls CD off the shelf and listened to it shortly after getting the idea for this fic. I skipped around and started listening to one of my favorite songs. It just... Fit so well. It's a pretty song, too. Enjoy!
Goo Goo Dolls : Hate This Place
Gone away Who knows where you been You take all your lies And wish them all away I somehow doubt We'll ever be the same There's too much poison And confusion on your face
Can you feel it I didn't mean it Can I see you What are we doin' I think I love you But I ain't sayin' nothin' You don't know
Hold on dreamaway You're my sweet charade
Take your time Move yourself to me Yeah I can take your lies Until you fall away You know I'm lost Hiding in your bed No I don't think it's wrong It's just gone to my head
Can you feel it I didn't mean it Can I see you What are we doin' I think I love you But I ain't sayin' nothin' You don't know
Hold on dreamaway You're my sweet charade
Hey whatchya do to me Would you come back to me Yeah I can't do another day I'm not certain of it anyway I ain't messin' with another life Can I get along without you Tell me the lies That you know I need
Hold on dreamaway You're my sweet charade Hold on dreamaway You're my sweet charade
Hold on dreamaway Hold on dreamaway
++
"Stop it..."
The words were barely whispered. He wasn't so much trying to resist the boy as he was trying not to give in. His initial shock was giving way to unfelt feelings that threatened to boil over.
Riku held Sora's head gently, kissing his cheeks and neck. Sora's eyes were shut, unsure of what to think or do. This was... Wrong. They were /guys/. More importantly, they were /friends/. This wasn't supposed to happen! What was he supposed to do? He didn't want to, but it was starting to feel really good, really right.
Sora gulped and opened his eyes, pushing Riku away. He looked into his friend's half-lidded, lust-filled eyes and was too stupefied to say anything for a moment. "What's wrong?" Riku finally broke the silence.
"I-I... I... /This/ is wrong! I mean, we... We're..." Sora groped his mind for something intelligent to say; a rather arduous task whilst trying to process just what the hell they had been doing and why he had been enjoying it so much. "We're /boys/, Riku. I mean, this isn't supposed to happen, right?"
"But it is." Riku looked almost passive, staring deeply into Sora's confused, panic-stricken face. "Sora... It's okay. Let me love you." He put his hand on Sora's cheek, waiting for a reaction.
"It's just. Ah! I don't know! It feels right, but a part of me just..." He looked to the floor beside them, away from Riku's comforting hand.
"If it feels right, how can it be wrong?" Riku leaned in and whispered in Sora's ear, planting a small kiss on his jawbone.
Sora pushed him away again, a new feeling arising: distrust. "Riku, how did it feel when the darkness swallowed you?"
Riku blinked and backed away a little. "Bad. I was scared to death."
"But you let it take you anyway." Sora's eyes narrowed. "It must've felt good at some point."
"Well, yeah... But only briefly! Then it went back to being a living hell! They needed to distract me so I'd cooperate. Sora, I didn't want that to happen, I thought they would help me. I fought them for a long time; I couldn't help but give in!" Riku looked at his friend desperately, but saw no comfort in his gaze.
"Sometimes I wonder if you really came back to our side." Sora's eyes showed faint traces of tears as he turned on his heel and ran. He didn't know where he was going; he just wanted to get away.
"SORA!" Riku called anxiously, but it was too late. "Sora..." He sank to his knees, head in his hands. "I never meant..." Tears that had been held in far too long stung his eyes and rolled down his cheeks. "I never... I'm sorry."
'Maybe I came on too strong, too fast. I mean, it /has/ been two years...' Two long years ago, Riku had been shut inside Kingdom Hearts by his best friend, the object of his affection, his light... /his/ Sora. And for two long years he had screamed himself hoarse in the vast emptiness wondering why he hadn't jumped through the doors and pushed from the outside. But deep down he knew. He wanted to protect Sora, from himself.
Riku had let his lust get /way/ out of line in his quest to find Sora, turning to the very source of the Heartless for help. But in losing his heart to Ansem, he forgot how to love, and all his feelings turned into hatred.
And he hated Sora most of all.
That was why he allowed himself to fight his only love. Because love was hate, up was down, left was right, good was bad. He let the darkness swallow him whole. It /had/ felt good. He felt at peace, at ease. But when Ansem tried to take on Sora, well, he just couldn't allow that to happen. Deep his mind, something reminded him of his feelings, of his love.
Riku used what was left of his strength to save the person he had tried so hard to destroy. It didn't feel good anymore after that. Then he felt the cold stab of guilt, of fear, of helplessness. What had once vaguely resembled light now reared its ugly head as true darkness. He felt himself slipping further and further into its frozen depths.
But he still saw light. It was like being at the bottom of a pool, looking up to a distorted ray of sunlight, fighting with all your strength to reach it, knowing that soon you would drown; soon the light would be gone.
Something tugged at his heart after his descent. He didn't know what it was, but it had felt strangely good. It was different from the pain pulling on the other side of his heart, telling him to give up and give in. It took him a while to realize that it was Sora. He and Sora now shared some sort of bond. Riku had saved his friend's life, and now Sora was forever indebted to him. It /was/ a good feeling, but he didn't quite understand all the things it was causing him to feel.
At times, it was actual physical pain, but it was mostly emotional hurt. Sometimes he had an overwhelming sense of defeat; others he felt determined and renewed. This was what Sora was feeling. Riku finally understood and monitored his friend's actions closely. Hurt, anger, determination, fear, helplessness, hopelessness, triumph, surprise, pain. Horrible pain. Riku gasped at this new feeling. Sora was falling too. But... But Sora /couldn't/ fall!
Riku screamed at this sense of terror. The world had been pulled out from under him. He reached out to Sora. Through the darkness, through the fear, and he whispered to him, with all that was left of his voice.
"Giving up already? C'mon, Sora, I thought you were stronger than that."
And Riku fell. He was lost, in the deep, suffocating blackness. The light was too far above him now. But he was glad, that even for that one moment, he had been able to reach Sora. And then he realized what he felt was love.
He finally did get to see Sora again, for what he thought would be the last time. They had to close the door to Kingdom Hearts. Riku was afraid of being alone in there, but he /had/ to protect Sora. If he'd done so many horrible things just trying to find him, he didn't know what he might be capable of next.
The hurt look on Sora's face as they closed the door killed Riku. He didn't want Sora to hurt again. Not ever. He thought of the only thing that could make Sora happy. Kairi.
"Take care of her for me."
Kairi. The word stabbed the back of his mind like a piercing blade. He had never loved her. He liked her, sure. They had all been great friends. But he felt a bit on uneven ground with her. He loved competing with Sora, but there was a different sort of competition between him and her. They had been vying for Sora's heart. Riku had been using her to make Sora jealous. He now wondered if she had known and that was why she hadn't returned Riku's fake affections. She hardly seemed interested in him as anything more that a friend. This made him scoff a laugh. Kairi had always been very observant.
It was common knowledge that Kairi and Sora had a 'thing' going. Riku's feelings, however, were unknown, even by himself. Sora seemed equally happy when with either of them, and this now confused Riku even more. Hadn't Sora loved Kairi back? If he had, then why hadn't he spent more time with Kairi, or at least wanted to be with her more than he was? Riku looked at the ground. He couldn't have loved them both. Not when he'd just so violently rejected Riku. He sighed. What the hell was wrong with them all? Damned teenage crap. Seventeen years old and what did he have to show for it? More pain than most people have felt in a lifetime.
Why had he come back here; to the dark, deserted tree house on Destiny Islands? He didn't really know. He just sort of... Woke up there. Frightened by his new surroundings, he decided against venturing out until someone, or something, found him first. He huddled in a corner, clutching his Keyblade. The years hadn't been kind to him. He was frailer than he had been, though his muscles were still defined under his tight yellow tank top. He had ditched his blue baggy pants in favor of a closer fitting pair of dark blue jeans. He didn't wear shoes anymore. No need for them, really. His hair had grown quite a bit and flowed down to his elbows. He managed to keep his bangs, though, by cutting them every month or so with his keyblade. They were beginning to get a little shaggy. His eyes were the only thing about him that was unchanged. The bright seagreen orbs still held an undying fire that blazed in times of great fear, anger, or passion.
It was Sora who found him. The younger boy had looked through the door a bit curiously and with a touch of fear in his eyes before he let them rest on Riku's pale form. Sora had also changed, but not as much. He now wore a red tee-shirt, which clung closely to his well-defined abdomen. His red shorts had been replaced by a pair of tight leather pants. His crown necklace and keychain were still visible, glinting in the sunlight. His hair remained as it had two years ago, but was lightened a bit. What struck Riku most, though, were his eyes. They looked... Different. He looked wiser, more mature. A bit of the naivete Riku had found so adorable was gone. Sora had seen horrible things with those deep blue eyes, and it showed.
They were both shocked by the other's sudden appearance, and for a moment they merely gazed at each other open-mouthed. At the exact same moment the said the other's name, then rushed toward each other and embraced in a hug.
"RIKU! Oh, my God! What are you doing here?" Sora yelled next to his friend's ear.
"I was going to ask you the same question!" Riku laughed, holding his friend tighter.
"What happened to us?" Sora inquired, his face becoming more serious. His initial surprise was giving way to forgotten feelings of uncertainty.
"I don't know." Riku blinked. "I was just sort of... Here." He leaned in closer to Sora and moved his hands down to his waist. "But I have you back. Sora... You're all I've thought about these past two years." He lost control of himself. Being with Sora again was unbearable. He kissed Sora's neck gently.
Sora responded by kissing Riku's forehead. "I've missed you, too. I was looking for you, you know." He leaned his head on the other boy's shoulder.
"Were you now?" Riku kissed Sora's neck again, moving his lips higher until he reached Sora's cheek.
Sora lifted his head. "R-Riku... Wh-What are you doing?" He tried to pull away from Riku's dominating hold.
"Shh..." Riku hissed into Sora's cheek. "I've thought of nothing but you for two years. I love you, Sora. I always have." He kissed Sora's lips passionately. The other boy's initial shock soon wore down and he relaxed a little, but did not respond. When Riku's tongue began to glide across his lower lip, however, Sora broke their contact.
"Stop it..."
And I lay you at our current scene, once upon a time.
+++
White goes with anything, but it looks best with black and brown.
Heh, that's my new philosophy. My fave yaoi couples: Sora and Riku; Draco and Harry. Woo! Anyways, hope you enjoyed! I really have no idea where the hell this fic is going, but I do know it'll end up with Sora and Riku sharing as close to a lemon as the FF.net police will let me get away with XD
If you have any ideas or suggestions for anything even resembling a plot, e- mail me at pitiful@earthing.net I may not use your ideas exactly, but I'll take them into account. And I do so love to get e-mail. I'm so lonely. Won't someone love me?! God, I'm pathetic.+sulks+
My second chapter fic! Yay! I'ma be annoying and put up a song first to set the tone of this one. It's RikuSora, sorta SoKairi (you can't just pretend she doesn't exist, you know!), but it WILL end RikuSora. So, if you don't like that idea, flame me all you want. I really don't give a damn. I'm bi myself and see absolutely nothing wrong with same-sex relationships. XP But, other people do, and that's a part of this fic. Maybe I should've named it 'Acceptance'. Oh well.
Uh, first chapters are always boring. Lots of explaining to do. Or maybe it's just my style. Still, they're necessary to read, or you'll be lost throughout the rest of the fic.
Anyways, if you've read any of my previous works, you know I'm addicted to music. I pulled my old Goo Goo Dolls CD off the shelf and listened to it shortly after getting the idea for this fic. I skipped around and started listening to one of my favorite songs. It just... Fit so well. It's a pretty song, too. Enjoy!
Goo Goo Dolls : Hate This Place
Gone away Who knows where you been You take all your lies And wish them all away I somehow doubt We'll ever be the same There's too much poison And confusion on your face
Can you feel it I didn't mean it Can I see you What are we doin' I think I love you But I ain't sayin' nothin' You don't know
Hold on dreamaway You're my sweet charade
Take your time Move yourself to me Yeah I can take your lies Until you fall away You know I'm lost Hiding in your bed No I don't think it's wrong It's just gone to my head
Can you feel it I didn't mean it Can I see you What are we doin' I think I love you But I ain't sayin' nothin' You don't know
Hold on dreamaway You're my sweet charade
Hey whatchya do to me Would you come back to me Yeah I can't do another day I'm not certain of it anyway I ain't messin' with another life Can I get along without you Tell me the lies That you know I need
Hold on dreamaway You're my sweet charade Hold on dreamaway You're my sweet charade
Hold on dreamaway Hold on dreamaway
++
"Stop it..."
The words were barely whispered. He wasn't so much trying to resist the boy as he was trying not to give in. His initial shock was giving way to unfelt feelings that threatened to boil over.
Riku held Sora's head gently, kissing his cheeks and neck. Sora's eyes were shut, unsure of what to think or do. This was... Wrong. They were /guys/. More importantly, they were /friends/. This wasn't supposed to happen! What was he supposed to do? He didn't want to, but it was starting to feel really good, really right.
Sora gulped and opened his eyes, pushing Riku away. He looked into his friend's half-lidded, lust-filled eyes and was too stupefied to say anything for a moment. "What's wrong?" Riku finally broke the silence.
"I-I... I... /This/ is wrong! I mean, we... We're..." Sora groped his mind for something intelligent to say; a rather arduous task whilst trying to process just what the hell they had been doing and why he had been enjoying it so much. "We're /boys/, Riku. I mean, this isn't supposed to happen, right?"
"But it is." Riku looked almost passive, staring deeply into Sora's confused, panic-stricken face. "Sora... It's okay. Let me love you." He put his hand on Sora's cheek, waiting for a reaction.
"It's just. Ah! I don't know! It feels right, but a part of me just..." He looked to the floor beside them, away from Riku's comforting hand.
"If it feels right, how can it be wrong?" Riku leaned in and whispered in Sora's ear, planting a small kiss on his jawbone.
Sora pushed him away again, a new feeling arising: distrust. "Riku, how did it feel when the darkness swallowed you?"
Riku blinked and backed away a little. "Bad. I was scared to death."
"But you let it take you anyway." Sora's eyes narrowed. "It must've felt good at some point."
"Well, yeah... But only briefly! Then it went back to being a living hell! They needed to distract me so I'd cooperate. Sora, I didn't want that to happen, I thought they would help me. I fought them for a long time; I couldn't help but give in!" Riku looked at his friend desperately, but saw no comfort in his gaze.
"Sometimes I wonder if you really came back to our side." Sora's eyes showed faint traces of tears as he turned on his heel and ran. He didn't know where he was going; he just wanted to get away.
"SORA!" Riku called anxiously, but it was too late. "Sora..." He sank to his knees, head in his hands. "I never meant..." Tears that had been held in far too long stung his eyes and rolled down his cheeks. "I never... I'm sorry."
'Maybe I came on too strong, too fast. I mean, it /has/ been two years...' Two long years ago, Riku had been shut inside Kingdom Hearts by his best friend, the object of his affection, his light... /his/ Sora. And for two long years he had screamed himself hoarse in the vast emptiness wondering why he hadn't jumped through the doors and pushed from the outside. But deep down he knew. He wanted to protect Sora, from himself.
Riku had let his lust get /way/ out of line in his quest to find Sora, turning to the very source of the Heartless for help. But in losing his heart to Ansem, he forgot how to love, and all his feelings turned into hatred.
And he hated Sora most of all.
That was why he allowed himself to fight his only love. Because love was hate, up was down, left was right, good was bad. He let the darkness swallow him whole. It /had/ felt good. He felt at peace, at ease. But when Ansem tried to take on Sora, well, he just couldn't allow that to happen. Deep his mind, something reminded him of his feelings, of his love.
Riku used what was left of his strength to save the person he had tried so hard to destroy. It didn't feel good anymore after that. Then he felt the cold stab of guilt, of fear, of helplessness. What had once vaguely resembled light now reared its ugly head as true darkness. He felt himself slipping further and further into its frozen depths.
But he still saw light. It was like being at the bottom of a pool, looking up to a distorted ray of sunlight, fighting with all your strength to reach it, knowing that soon you would drown; soon the light would be gone.
Something tugged at his heart after his descent. He didn't know what it was, but it had felt strangely good. It was different from the pain pulling on the other side of his heart, telling him to give up and give in. It took him a while to realize that it was Sora. He and Sora now shared some sort of bond. Riku had saved his friend's life, and now Sora was forever indebted to him. It /was/ a good feeling, but he didn't quite understand all the things it was causing him to feel.
At times, it was actual physical pain, but it was mostly emotional hurt. Sometimes he had an overwhelming sense of defeat; others he felt determined and renewed. This was what Sora was feeling. Riku finally understood and monitored his friend's actions closely. Hurt, anger, determination, fear, helplessness, hopelessness, triumph, surprise, pain. Horrible pain. Riku gasped at this new feeling. Sora was falling too. But... But Sora /couldn't/ fall!
Riku screamed at this sense of terror. The world had been pulled out from under him. He reached out to Sora. Through the darkness, through the fear, and he whispered to him, with all that was left of his voice.
"Giving up already? C'mon, Sora, I thought you were stronger than that."
And Riku fell. He was lost, in the deep, suffocating blackness. The light was too far above him now. But he was glad, that even for that one moment, he had been able to reach Sora. And then he realized what he felt was love.
He finally did get to see Sora again, for what he thought would be the last time. They had to close the door to Kingdom Hearts. Riku was afraid of being alone in there, but he /had/ to protect Sora. If he'd done so many horrible things just trying to find him, he didn't know what he might be capable of next.
The hurt look on Sora's face as they closed the door killed Riku. He didn't want Sora to hurt again. Not ever. He thought of the only thing that could make Sora happy. Kairi.
"Take care of her for me."
Kairi. The word stabbed the back of his mind like a piercing blade. He had never loved her. He liked her, sure. They had all been great friends. But he felt a bit on uneven ground with her. He loved competing with Sora, but there was a different sort of competition between him and her. They had been vying for Sora's heart. Riku had been using her to make Sora jealous. He now wondered if she had known and that was why she hadn't returned Riku's fake affections. She hardly seemed interested in him as anything more that a friend. This made him scoff a laugh. Kairi had always been very observant.
It was common knowledge that Kairi and Sora had a 'thing' going. Riku's feelings, however, were unknown, even by himself. Sora seemed equally happy when with either of them, and this now confused Riku even more. Hadn't Sora loved Kairi back? If he had, then why hadn't he spent more time with Kairi, or at least wanted to be with her more than he was? Riku looked at the ground. He couldn't have loved them both. Not when he'd just so violently rejected Riku. He sighed. What the hell was wrong with them all? Damned teenage crap. Seventeen years old and what did he have to show for it? More pain than most people have felt in a lifetime.
Why had he come back here; to the dark, deserted tree house on Destiny Islands? He didn't really know. He just sort of... Woke up there. Frightened by his new surroundings, he decided against venturing out until someone, or something, found him first. He huddled in a corner, clutching his Keyblade. The years hadn't been kind to him. He was frailer than he had been, though his muscles were still defined under his tight yellow tank top. He had ditched his blue baggy pants in favor of a closer fitting pair of dark blue jeans. He didn't wear shoes anymore. No need for them, really. His hair had grown quite a bit and flowed down to his elbows. He managed to keep his bangs, though, by cutting them every month or so with his keyblade. They were beginning to get a little shaggy. His eyes were the only thing about him that was unchanged. The bright seagreen orbs still held an undying fire that blazed in times of great fear, anger, or passion.
It was Sora who found him. The younger boy had looked through the door a bit curiously and with a touch of fear in his eyes before he let them rest on Riku's pale form. Sora had also changed, but not as much. He now wore a red tee-shirt, which clung closely to his well-defined abdomen. His red shorts had been replaced by a pair of tight leather pants. His crown necklace and keychain were still visible, glinting in the sunlight. His hair remained as it had two years ago, but was lightened a bit. What struck Riku most, though, were his eyes. They looked... Different. He looked wiser, more mature. A bit of the naivete Riku had found so adorable was gone. Sora had seen horrible things with those deep blue eyes, and it showed.
They were both shocked by the other's sudden appearance, and for a moment they merely gazed at each other open-mouthed. At the exact same moment the said the other's name, then rushed toward each other and embraced in a hug.
"RIKU! Oh, my God! What are you doing here?" Sora yelled next to his friend's ear.
"I was going to ask you the same question!" Riku laughed, holding his friend tighter.
"What happened to us?" Sora inquired, his face becoming more serious. His initial surprise was giving way to forgotten feelings of uncertainty.
"I don't know." Riku blinked. "I was just sort of... Here." He leaned in closer to Sora and moved his hands down to his waist. "But I have you back. Sora... You're all I've thought about these past two years." He lost control of himself. Being with Sora again was unbearable. He kissed Sora's neck gently.
Sora responded by kissing Riku's forehead. "I've missed you, too. I was looking for you, you know." He leaned his head on the other boy's shoulder.
"Were you now?" Riku kissed Sora's neck again, moving his lips higher until he reached Sora's cheek.
Sora lifted his head. "R-Riku... Wh-What are you doing?" He tried to pull away from Riku's dominating hold.
"Shh..." Riku hissed into Sora's cheek. "I've thought of nothing but you for two years. I love you, Sora. I always have." He kissed Sora's lips passionately. The other boy's initial shock soon wore down and he relaxed a little, but did not respond. When Riku's tongue began to glide across his lower lip, however, Sora broke their contact.
"Stop it..."
And I lay you at our current scene, once upon a time.
+++
White goes with anything, but it looks best with black and brown.
Heh, that's my new philosophy. My fave yaoi couples: Sora and Riku; Draco and Harry. Woo! Anyways, hope you enjoyed! I really have no idea where the hell this fic is going, but I do know it'll end up with Sora and Riku sharing as close to a lemon as the FF.net police will let me get away with XD
If you have any ideas or suggestions for anything even resembling a plot, e- mail me at pitiful@earthing.net I may not use your ideas exactly, but I'll take them into account. And I do so love to get e-mail. I'm so lonely. Won't someone love me?! God, I'm pathetic.+sulks+