Before Sarah's Wedding:
Ann didn't get it. She didn't like real guys anymore. It was becoming bizarre. All she saw was anime guys here, anime guys there, anime guys EVERYWHERE. Anime guys with crazy-hair. Anime guys with saucer eyes. Anime guys with Lautner tendencies of shirtlessness. Homicidal, maniacal anime guys. Ingenious, prodigious anime guys. If she could only look away from her computer screen and stop drawing the imaginary children she'd have with these guys, she might just cure herself a bit. The sickness was too strong though and Ichigo Kurosaki was the one to be given all of the blame.
She adjusted her pretty bridesmaids dress with one hand as she chugged down Dr. Pepper with the other. As a last minute thought, she pulled out a tube of chapstick and applied it in front of the mirror. She pulled on her dangerously high-heeled shoes and reached for the door handle. Before she even touched the metal, the doorbell rang.
"Delivery for um, Strawberry Shortcake Shorty Pixie Yachiru." He looked way down at Ann's pink hair. "I presume it's for you."
"I presume so…" Ann said through gritted teeth and took the box out of his hand. She slammed shut the door and ripped through the long, thin box. The box's contents had something in them she didn't imagine even existed. It was the handsomest, most incredible form of beauty. With luscious orange cardboard hair and warm brown cardboard eyes, stood her very own cardboard Ichigo.
"Well I found myself a date to the wedding." She giggled. Little did she know Orihime was following her.
After Sarah's Wedding:
Ann walked back inside with a warm feeling inside her heart. Sarah was happily married, another wedding was on the way, and she had the sexiest boyfriend on earth. Who cares if he was made of cardboard; she wasn't stereotyped. Didn't the founding fathers say all men should be treated equally, no matter what the man was made of, flesh and blood, ink, digital bytes, or cardboard. She placed cardboard Ichigo besides her in her bed and covered both him and her with a soft blanket.
"Oh Ichigo, if only you were real…" she murmured half-asleep. Coincidentally, Ann's fairy godmother, Yuroichi Shihouen happened to be giving Ann one of the usual late night visits at that point. Yuroichi smiled maternally and tapped Ann on the head with her black kitty wand.
"Your wish has been granted dearest goddaughter." With that, she kissed Ann goodbye on the forehead and disappeared in a mist of condensed water.
Next Morning Ann woke up with a sunshiny smile and a big yawn. She turned cheerfully to Ichigo.
"Good Morning my amazingly- WHOA!" Ichigo sat up and rubbed his eyes, pure sexiness in a loose but fitted white sleep shirt.
"What am I doing here?" He asked Ann. "Who are you?"
Ann grinned, feeling her devil horns sticking out. She quickly pulled on her Urahara hat before they could show. "I am your wife, Ann."
"Wow I have such a cute wife." Ichigo murmured.
"I'm not cute! You could at least say lovely or something. Why's it gotta go be cute?"
"Aww. Come here you." Ichigo reached out and started tickling her. There was no end to the tickling. Actually there was. The end was a kiss. Ann's first kiss.