U + UR Hand
I don't own Twilight. Alas. I don't own the song, either. Damn.
This is a dirty, angsty, completely OOC, AH Twilight, short, short story. It's AU as these vampires aren't startling cold or hard and can drink alcohol, Mick St. John style. (If you don't know who Mick St. John is, shame on you!) Stop now if you are underage. Otherwise, enjoy!
I said it again, well screamed it again, just to be clear:
"Fuck you!"
I heard Alice squeal with delight upstairs. Leave it to Alice to find the delight in the scene currently unfolding in the Cullen's living room.
I was annoyed when Tanya showed up here for a visit with her old friends, the Cullens, just a month before mine and Edward's wedding. She might have them all fooled (then again, probably not) but she was really only here for one reason. She wanted to take one last pass at Edward. My fiancé. I had figured that once Edward had changed me she'd give it up once and for all. I obviously underestimated the determination of a millennia old succubus.
Until today Edward had done a good job of never being alone with her. Perhaps we had all let our guard down since she wasn't obvious about her pursuit, but I, at least, should have known better. I had just walked into the living room to find Edward seated on the couch with Tanya straddled over him. She was kissing him. To his credit his arms were splayed wide against the back of the couch, his hands gripping the fabric there. He was squirming, perhaps trying to remove her without actually touching her. She had a tight grasp on his collar and had pulled his head forward, off the couch.
I screeched. I couldn't help it.
Tanya popped off Edward's lap and sat next to him, wiping at the corners of her mouth with her fingertips.
"Oh, hi, Bella," was all she said.
I ignored her, my eyes fixed on Edward. He hadn't moved. His eyes were wide and his chest heaved with unnecessary breaths. I was furious. Beyond furious. He should know better. He should have avoided this situation. There was no reason for him to be ignorant of her intent. He could fuckin' read minds, for cryin' out loud!
"Bella… I… she…" he was obviously at a loss for words. Well, I had a few for him.
"Fuck you, Edward!"
I said it again, well screamed it again, just to be clear:
"Fuck you!"
When I heard Alice's squeal upstairs my plans came together. As I dashed to the room I shared with Edward I could hear a flurry of activity. Alice and Rosalie were both scurrying around. I could hear drawers opening and slamming shut again. I heard doors opening and the protesting yells of Emmett and Jasper.
"It's just for a few hours, Jasper," Alice called as her husband stomped towards the stairs. Emmett found himself facing a closed door as Rosalie shoved him into the hallway. I walked into mine and Edward's room to find a lacy white top and white leather pants laid across the bed. On the floor were 6" silver stilettos.
I pulled off Elizabeth Masen's ring and left it on the nightstand. I changed in a flash put on a ton of sultry makeup and walked into the hallway to meet Alice and Rosalie.
Alice was in a red leather halter that left her back and midriff bare. Where the hell did she find clothes like these? Her hot pants looked like they had been painted on and her heels were even higher than mine. Rosalie was dressed more demurely, but that was only in relative comparison to Alice and me. She was in black leather from head to toe. She may have been more covered than us, but the outfit left nothing to the imagination.
Alice hooked her arms through both of ours.
"Let's go!" she enthused.
As we trotted downstairs my enhanced hearing picked up the conversation in the living room. Jasper was berating Edward, telling him to get his head screwed on straight because he didn't like where the evening was heading. Emmett wasn't a big talker but he grunted his agreement. Edward remained silent. I marched straight to the garage while Alice and Rosalie stopped by the living room to bid their husbands goodbye. Even in the garage I could hear the strangled gasps when Jasper and Emmett saw their wives.
"Ro-," Emmett started, "what the hell…"
"Alice," Jasper chimed in, "you are not…"
I jumped in my Ferrari, started it up and revved the engine. A moment later I could hear Rosalie's BMW purr to life and Alice's Porsche roared on my other side. The garage doors opened and the three of us took off.
Check it out,
Goin' out,
On the late night.
Lookin' tight,
Feelin' nice,
It's a cockfight.
I can tell,
I just know,
That it's goin' down,
Tonight.
I let Alice take the lead since I had no idea where we were going. On the highway she flipped off her lights and I followed course. As the needle on my speedometer eased its way to 160 I turned on the radio. The music was loud and angry and fit my mood perfectly.
In just over an hour we screeched to a stop outside what was obviously the hottest club in Seattle. The line to get in wound around the building. We didn't even bother. The three of us left the cars running right outside the entrance and walked towards the bouncers. They didn't even consult their clipboards, they simply unhooked the ropes. We bumped and grinded our way in as three valets shot towards our still running vehicles.
I immediately headed to the bar, flanked by Alice and Rosalie. The bartender glanced at us as Alice produced a fistful of $100s. He lined up some shot glasses and started pouring.
At the door we don't wait 'cause we know them
At the bar, six shots, just beginnin'.
We had just finished the drinks on the bar when a vaguely familiar man approached with a group of friends. I rolled my eyes. Some nationally known someone-or-other, I was sure. I never understood the entourage thing. He eyed the three of us and sauntered over.
"Hey!" he yelled at me. The music was deafening. "What's your name?"
"It doesn't matter." I yelled back. He looked surprised.
"I'm…" he started.
"I don't care," I cut him off. Grabbing his shirt I towed him onto the dance floor and started moving to the music. It didn't take long for whomever-he-was to get overly friendly.
That's when dickhead put his hands on me
But you see…
I'm not here for your entertainment
You don't really want to mess with me tonight
Just stop and take a second
I was fine before you walked into my life
'Cause you know it's over
Before it began
The song ended, neatly segueing into the next. I turned on my heel and stalked off the dance floor, heading back to the bar. My partner followed me.
"Can I buy you a drink?"
I looked him straight in the eye. "No."
He flushed angrily. I'd have laughed at him, but was still too mad to appreciate the humor in the situation. He beckoned to the bartender.
"Give her whatever she wants," he said, throwing a $50 on the bar before stalking away. The bartender looked at me inquiringly. I picked up the fifty, folded it in half and stuck it in my bra.
Keep your drink, just give me the money
It's just U + UR hand tonight.
It was only an hour later that the guys walked in. I should have realized that they'd follow us here. Rose, Alice and I were holding court in the middle of the dance floor. We were unstoppable. No one could match our moves and any guys who got close enough to touch were summarily rebuffed.
Midnight,
I'm drunk,
I don't give a fuck
Wanna' dance,
By myself,
Guess you're outta' luck.
Don't touch,
Back up,
I'm not the one.
Uh, buh-bye!
Emmett, Jasper and Edward joined the crowd on the floor, dancing their way towards us. When Jasper reached Alice she wrapped her arms around his waist and continued to dance. Emmett has similar success with Rosalie. I turned my back on Edward as he moved across the dance floor towards me. I was still plenty angry. He hadn't suffered nearly enough as far as I was concerned. He snaked his arm around my waist and pulled my back tight against his front. I disentangled myself from his hold and continued to dance alone.
Listen up, it's just not happenin'
You can say, what you want to your boyfriends
Just let me have my fun tonight
Aiight?
I could hear him snarl, embarrassed, as he stalked away giving me my space. The loud music was providing me an escape – I couldn't even think because of the pounding noise. I suddenly realized that my buzz was slipping. I walked purposefully towards the bar.
The same bartender from earlier looked at my warily. Sighing, he handed me a $100. I knew exactly what had happened. Edward paid him for my drinks. I took the hundred from his hand and fished the $50 out of my bra. I then ordered a few more shots and stuffed the $100 bill down my front. The bartender grinned as I downed them one after another.
I'm not here for your entertainment
You don't really want to mess with me tonight
Just stop and take a second
I was fine before you walked into my life
'Cause you know it's over
Before it began
Keep your drink, just give me the money
It's just U + UR hand tonight.
Rosalie and Alice freed themselves from their husbands' embraces and joined me at the bar. The guys glared at a few people sitting in a corner who suddenly remembered pressing engagements elsewhere. The three of them settled into the now empty booth and put their heads together. They continued talking until they finally got Edward to smile. I saw him nod and reach for his wallet. He pulled out five bills as did Emmett and Jasper. Jasper put all the money into his front pocket and the three of them stood again.
You're in the corner with your boys, you bet 'em five bucks
You'd get that girl that just walked in, but she thinks you suck.
We didn't get all dressed up just for you to see
So quit spilling your drinks on me
Oh yeah!
Finally, the song I'd been waiting for all night started playing. U + UR Hand by Pink fit my mood perfectly tonight. I jumped off my barstool and went right to the dance floor. Edward joined me and I let him. I danced against him closer than I ever had before. I could feel every bit of him against me as we moved together. I leaned towards his ear.
"What's the bet?" I asked.
"I bet $250 against each of them that I'd walk out of here with you tonight."
I arched my eyebrow as the song continued.
"You're pretty confident, considering…" I said.
"Alice saw it," was all he answered.
As the song ended, I grabbed his hand and walked to the door. He smirked at Emmett as we walked past him and Rosalie.
"Sonofabitch!" Emmett complained.
"Don't try to play a player, Em," was Edward's response.
Jasper was closer to the door. He held out his hand and Edward smacked him a high five, coming away with the $1000 Jasper had been holding.
You know who you are: high fivin', talkin' shit...
Outside I beckoned to the valet. As he ran to get my car I took the $1000 from Edward's hand. "Did Alice see this?" I asked him.
He looked confused.
"Miss?" the valet had arrived with my Ferrari. I reached into my bra and pulled out the $100 Edward had given the bartender earlier.
"Thanks," I said handing the valet the hundred as I got into the driver's seat and pulled away before Edward could get in on the passenger side.
But you're going home alone, aren't 'cha?
'Cause, I'm not here for your entertainment
You don't really want to mess with me tonight
Just stop and take a second
I was fine before you walked into my life
'Cause you know it's over
Before it began
Keep your drink, just give me the money
I laughed as I picked up speed and zoomed home, my mood finally lightening. Edward and the others didn't get home until two hours later. By that time I had showered and changed into comfortable sweats. My hair was pulled up into a high ponytail. I was reading in our room when I heard them pull up. The guys were still giving Edward a hard time. I could hear, from my seat on our bed, that they agreed Edward had won the bet – he had walked out of the club with me – but they didn't seem to mind at all, since they were able to spend the last two hours riding him hard about being left at the curb.
I heard him snarl as he came up the stairs and entered our room. I looked up. Boy, was he mad. He closed the door behind him as he approached the bed. His eyes flickered to the nightstand where I had left his mother's ring earlier. It had been replaced with the neat stack of $100s and $50 from earlier tonight. Elizabeth's ring was back on my finger, where it belonged.
When Edward noticed the ring on my finger he seemed to calm down considerably. He sat on the bed, near my side and reached out for me. I leaned forward and kissed him on the lips, gently, at first, but with more urgency as he turned to face me fully. I inhaled his scent when he broke away from my lips and trailed kisses down my jaw and neck to my collarbone.
I kneaded his shoulders as he continued to shower me with kisses. He pulled my hair out of its ponytail. His hands moved under the hem of my shirt and brushed against the undersides of my breasts, causing me to catch my breath, before dropping again to the waist of my sweatpants. He ran his thumbs under the elastic as if asking permission to remove the offending garment.
"Edward…" I whispered, my eyes closed.
"Yes, Bella?" I could hear the triumph in his voice.
I opened my eyes. "It's just U + UR Hand tonight."
Turning on my side I opened my book and started reading where I had left off.