I don't own Degrassi. This is something I'd like to call…Hadam.

"Come on Kid, I need you to get up here so I can show you it before it leaves!" the redhead giggled at her boyfriend of three months. He was trudging up a green hill, panting, already out of breath.

"H-how do you do this every day?" he managed to get out.

"I'm awesome…I guess?" Holly J shrugged as she sat on a rock at the edge of the cliff.

"Okay, okay, I'm up what did you-" but he was soon cut off because her soft lips were tugging on his gently in a kiss that swiftly took away his breath, "Look at the sky." She whispered gently against his lips.

And he did to see an explosion of lights infiltrating the night sky, booming out with loud noises and leaving smoke and tiny fire buds floating down to the earth.

"This is the best…place to see the fireworks, don't you think?" she asked him innocently as she looked up at the night sky.

"...I love you…Holly J Sinclair." He told her quietly as he stared at her shorter form. The lights were reflecting off her light eyes and her red hair never looked so vibrant to him.

She looked up at him with her large blue eyes, "Adam…I-I love you too." She smiled.

Holly J's turquoise blouse was rolled up to her elbows as she washed the dishes in her sink steadily, determined to get all of them done before her company had arrived, her French manicure would have gone to waste if she did not have her yellow gloves on.

Then she saw a lone black car pulled up her drive way and a package was left at her door by a general in the traditional green uniform with golden accessories. He rang the doorbell twice before leaving the brown box there and swiftly returning to his car, climbing into the back seat and driving away from her home.

Curious, she took the gloves off her hands and whipped her hand on her apron over her fancy blouse and black pencil skirt. She opened the door to see the box was bigger than she anticipated, large and brown. Bending down she picked it up and it was much too heavy for her but she sucked in a breath and carried it to her living room floor.

PLOP!

The impact to the ground was greater than she thought.

Grabbing a knife from her utensil stack she cut into the box and opened it up carefully to see if she damaged any of the insides or not.

The box was filled with paper.

Letters actually.

All addressed to one person, a Ms. Holly J Sinclair.

Furrowing her strawberry blonde eyebrows she picked up the very first one on the stack, it seemed to be very old for the paper was yellow and the ink looked as if it were dulling out a bit.

Using her French manicure tips she dug her nail into the envelope and ripped it open to see a few white line papers with a black pen scribbled on them.

She sat Indian style on the floor and tossed them into her hand ready to read whatever this was.

Big Red,

Were the first words she recognized and she let out an inaudible gasp as she recognized the endearment. Her third boyfriend of her whole life had given her that name. They dated their entire high school career.

His name was Adam Torres.

He was inches taller than her with brown messy hair that would fall in his bright blue eyes, with a lean structure, and a bubbly laugh that made her feel warm inside when they were dating.

He was the first one, besides her best friends at least, to see past her bitchy exterior to the frail girl that lay inside of her. And she loved every minute of it.

Peering down inside the box she wondered if they were all from him but I mean, there were about a couple dozen letters in total…

Shaking her head, Holly J smoothed her hand over the paper and began to read to an invisible audience:

Big Red,

Yeah, I know, it's been a while. If you're confused as to whom this is its Adam…Torres? Yeah we dated for like four years if you forgot. Please be able to tell that I'm trying to joke around in paper and as I read back I see it's failing completely. But it's pen so I can't really erase it…Anyways, the best way I read to not get traumatic stress during war is to elude yourself into believing something else and well…Red you've always been my muse to everything so I hope you don't mind but I'm still using you until this day.

I went into battle today, Holly J, me, the kid who tried to convinced you to skip P.E. all the time because I was too damn lazy to run all those laps. Glad you didn't let me influence you though, you're probably still fit while I'm here all army fat…I'm pouting. Anyways back to the topic. I, today wasn't the first time I held nor heard a gun. In training I learned the basics, like where's the trigger, how to load it, how to handle the recoil, best place to aim, etc, but nothing prepared me for what I saw today. Holly J, I killed a man today, men probably. But I didn't try to see it nor did I…actually see it. This may sound crazy but Boo-yah! If it wasn't for you I wouldn't have known how to deal with the situation! After my first few shots I got really scared…so I hid…and closed my eyes…and I saw the fireworks. The gun shots quickly faded into the sound of exploding lights and I swear to God my breathing became normal and my heart was okay and I stopped clutching my gun like as if it were going to kill me. In my head I saw the night sky and the lights of fire exploding in midair. And then I licked my lips, remembering exactly what you tasted like, felt like. And how I told you I love you. And how you practically raped me- okay, okay, I know too much detail but, it saved me Holly J. You saved me. If you never showed me the lights I…I could've died out there, in the field.

So here I am, in my bunker, writing to my high school sweet heart because I'm still helplessly in love with you. But I won't ruin this for you.

When I told you when we were graduating that I was moving-that was a bullshit lie. Holly J I didn't move. I was drafted into the army.

This letter is to also help my conscious. I wanted to tell you but…I know you. You would've freaked out, honey. And I couldn't afford that because I know that if I saw you do that, I would try to back out.

My name is Adam Roy Torres; I am a sergeant in the Canadian Army. I am in love with a redhead named Holly J Sinclair.

I promised myself I would write to you every day, Red. And I will. But I am never sending you these letters. Not now, not ever. You've probably moved on, haven't you? I'm not going to burden you with…me. These letters are for me, myself, and I but they will always be addressed to you Holly J, because you're my saving grace.

-Kid

A/N: So this is my crackship Hadam…yeah. Reviews would be lovely.
This huge war thing? I'm not sure if it's real but I was watching Private Ryan the other day and…

-BG