[Disclaimer: I don't own these characters. They belong to the amazing Rainbow Rowell.]
"So I was thinking about it, and…"
Levi paused and slowly ran his fingers up and down the glass of milk. He did this absentmindedly sometimes, almost as if it was a tic or something. Cath was used to it by now, and she figured he was pretty nervous tonight. He obviously had something on his mind; he had nearly missed her plate completely when he was dishing the mashed potatoes out.
"Yes?" she said, trying her best to be encouraging. Encouragement. It was something she was trying to work on. Even Levi needed support sometimes.
"Well, I just think it can get lonely here sometimes," he said, running his fingers up and down the glass faster now. "You know, when you're at work and I'm here alone."
"Okay…" Cath said, putting down her fork and shifting around in her chair.
"And, I was wondering if you wanted to get a cat," Levi said, not quite meeting her eyes.
For Cath, it was one of those bizarre moments when everything feels strangely surreal, like the person you're talking to just said that they don't want to be roommates with you. Or your Baz fanfic is plagiarism. Cath had experienced all too many of these moments over the past few years.
"Um… a cat?" she said.
"Yeah. Of course, if you think it's a dumb idea, we don't have to. But, I just thought that it could be good for us," Levi continued, obviously with some effort. "A good first step," he added quietly but firmly.
"First step to what?" Cath said. She was genuinely stumped on what he was talking about.
"You know, our life together," Levi said. "Here in Arnold."
"I… I don't know what to say, Levi. Do you really think I can take care of a cat?" she said.
"Actually, I think you'd be a great cat mom. You're good with caring for others," Levi said.
"No I'm not," she said.
"Cather, come on. Yes you are. You took care of your dad all those years," Levi said. "And you take care of me."
"Levi, you hardly need taking care of," Cath said. "You're a grown man."
"Not when I'm with you."
She felt a blush creep up her face. Levi reached over and felt her cheek. He liked doing this, feeling her warmth. She was still getting used to it even though they'd been together three and a half years now.
"Let me think about it, okay?" Cath said, bringing her hand up to his and placing it on top.
"Okay, take your time," Levi said, smiling. "Now tell me the travails of daily life in the public library."
"Cath! Where are you?"
It was Victoria. She was doing the whisper-shout that all experienced librarians knew how to do so well.
"Shit," Cath said from her place burrowed in the stacks, hurriedly closing the cover to the book, The Complete Idiot's Guide to Getting and Owning a Cat, and putting back on the shelf. The book was dog-eared and semi-water damaged, and torn in places where Cath suspected a dog (or a cat?) had bitten it.
"Coming, Victoria!" Cath shouted. She could see patrons looking up from their newspapers and computer workstations. Cath winced. She was still getting used to using a librarian voice and sometimes didn't realize her own strength. She clapped her hands over her mouth as if she could take it back.
She rounded the corner and walked over to Victoria, who was frowning at her from the central circulation desk. As she approached the desk Cath tried to figure out what Victoria would want right now when Cath had scheduled time to be in the stacks. She always felt like Victoria had it out for her and was probably right about it; Victoria scolded her constantly, taking issue with everything Cath did and scaring the hell out of her in her first two weeks. It hadn't let up since.
"Yes, Victoria?" she said when she got to the desk. She pushed her glasses up farther on her nose, realizing that they had nearly fallen off. Damn, got to get those fixed ASAP, she thought.
"What were you doing over there?"
"Um, just doing some research for my craft project," Cath said, thinking quickly. The pets section was near the art section of the nonfiction stacks.
"Well, any ideas?" Victoria asked.
"I'm thinking of something with paper snowflakes or ornaments," Cath replied.
"Hmm…okay, well stay on it. Anyway, I need you to retrieve some items for me, all right? Here's the list," the older librarian said, handing Cath a printout. Cath's heart instantly sank; it was a list of CD titles.
"Sure, Victoria," Cath said, forcing herself to smile. She took a basket and the list over to the music section and started rummaging through the cases.
Fuckin' A, she thought, feeling miserable. The CDs were the worst. Perpetually out of order thanks to the little kids who loved to run into the library after storytime and make chaos with the music each day, the CD section was a mess.
Digging through the shelves, Cath felt her mind wander.
A cat? Was Levi serious?
Cath had never had a cat before. She had half-jokingly tried to get her father to adopt a dog a few times to keep him company when she and Wren were at college, but it had never stuck. Cath wasn't sure she'd be any good at keeping a pet. Perhaps it was that nagging feeling that would never go away; even now that she was in her twenties she was convinced she could never handle any real responsibility.
But that was ridiculous. She was a children's librarian, for God's sake. She had to brave dozens of judgmental little faces each morning and make them smile. Maybe she could do the same thing with a cat? This was one of those times when she wished she could turn to Wren and ask for her advice…
At lunch, Cath took out her cell phone from her backpack and texted Wren. Levi wants to get a cat…what do you think?
A few minutes later, her phone vibrated. It was Wren.
Sounds like an awesome idea, Cath! Get a black one like Shadow!
I dunno, do you really think I would be a good cat mom?
Cath, come on. You've given S + B cats in fics before. Shadow, duh?
Yeah, but…
Do it! Levi wants to share this with you. Gotta run! Let me know what happens!
Cath frowned and sat back in her chair. She looked around her. Nobody was up in the offices with her right now. She woke up her computer and opened Chrome. After signing into her Fanfixx account, she scrolled through her pages of published works until she found the one she was looking for.
"Not Another Sappy Pet Parent Fic" by Magicath, c. 2010
She clicked on it and skimmed the story until she got to the part she was looking for.
"That one!" Simon cried, pointing to the kennel with a black cat.
"Dulce?" Baz said skeptically, looking at the tag on the cage.
"We'll rename him, of course," Simon said. "Can we see him?" he asked the volunteer from the shelter.
"I don't know about this, Simon…" Baz said. He was hoping Simon wasn't remembering the first time they met, when he had been bouncing around some girl's cat.
"Come on, he'll liven our place up," Simon said. He looked so happy, Baz couldn't help but melt. And all his reasoning behind not getting a pet—that he might be tempted to drink its blood, that they couldn't afford one, that he had never taken care of anything before—all faded away. This was right.
"We'll call him Shadow," Baz said, walking closer.
That night, Cath found Levi in the kitchen, cooking up some mac and cheese at the stove.
"Mmm…Mac and Cheese Mondays," she said, putting her arm around his shoulder and leaning into his arm.
"Hey, Sweetheart," Levi said, turning to face her. "How was your day?"
"Just another Monday. Happy to be back with you," she said, burrowed into his chest.
"And I with you," he said, kissing the top of her head.
"Levi…" Cath said, pulling back.
"Yes?" Levi said, tucking a loose hair behind her hair.
"Let's get a cat."
He smiled. All of him, not just his mouth. His throat, his neck, his eyebrows…all of the parts she loved.
"Hey," she said, leaning into him again. "I really like you," she whispered.
The mac and cheese burned, and they had to order pizza.
When Levi and Cath got to the shelter, Levi was immediately drawn to a quiet black cat in the furthest corner. The cat was surrounded by empty kennels.
Oh, geez. Cath thought. Levi looked like a little kid. Or like a big kid picking out a little kid companion.
"Cath, what about this one?" he shouted over to her from across the room.
"Coming," she said, following him.
"Have I read you my Simon-Baz fic about the cat?" she asked him.
Levi looked puzzled. Happy, but puzzled.
"Uh, no. What's it about?"
"Nevermind," Cath said, rolling her eyes. She bent down next to Levi. "Wow, he is super cute."
"She. Tiger. Who names a black cat 'Tiger'?" Levi said. "Can we see her?" he asked the volunteer running the adoption wing.
"Sure," she said, opening the kennel and picking Tiger up.
"Can I touch her?" Levi said.
"Go right ahead," the volunteer said.
Levi petted the cat gently down the bridge of its nose. It closed its eyes.
In spite of herself, Cath felt her heart melt. When she looked at Levi as he was now, smiling silly and blissfully happy, she felt like crying. Did she deserve this? Would it all end any minute now?
He somehow coaxed the volunteer into letting him hold Tiger.
"Come here, Cather. She won't bite," Levi said, still looking down at the cat. Cath stepped over carefully, afraid that if she did something wrong this whole scene would melt away.
"She's… adorable," Cath said.
"What do you think, huh, Sweetheart?" Levi asked.
"I think… I think… we should call her 'Cheetah.'"
Levi looked over at her and grinned.
"Cheetah it is," he said.
Later, when they were in bed, Cath tossed and turned. She leaned over to her nightstand and checked her texts. There was one from Wren in response to the picture the shelter volunteer had taken of Levi and Cath standing with Cheetah.
You're a family now! :) xo
Seeing the message made Cath smile. She put the phone back and turned on her back.
"Hey, you all right?" Levi whispered, leaning on his shoulder.
"I'm fine," she said, rolling across the bed and into his arms.
Just then they heard a jingle in the room coming closer to them. It was Cheetah. All of a sudden the jingling stopped until they heard a thump on the bed and a small body settling in by their legs.
"What did Wren say?" Levi said.
"That we're a family now," she replied.
"We are. And you know what, Cath?" Levi said.
"What?" she whispered.
"I'm not going anywhere," he said as he muzzled into her hair.