A.N.: This is a birthday gift from me to my beautiful and amazing and talented friend (Sarrah Habibi). I love you honey and HAPPY BIRTHDAY :D idk how often I said that to you yet ^^ and I hope you like it.

Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS:LA and the characters.


Kensi walked through the mall and came abruptly to stop. There he stood. She looked him in the eye and the emotions in her body swept over. How long had she waited for this moment to happen. All those years. And now? Now it was there and she couldn't react. Didn't know how to react, because her mind was stuck. Stuck between the then and now. And the then had caught her. Flashbacks came crashing back.


"Kensi, I love you more than everything, you're the best ever happened to me and I don't know what I would do without you. Will you marry me?" he asked her, kneeling down in front of her holding the little velvet box with the most beautiful ring ever.

"Yes." She whispered, and she cried. Tears streamed down her face, but they were happy tears. After knowing that she could loose him anytime, in matter of seconds it was comforting that he wanted them to be bonded. Their hearts bonded together. Married. He quickly put the ring on her finger and hugged her tightly. His dream came true. And this night they laid in bed, making up plans. It seemed like a harmless chatter and both of them hadn't realized yet that this was real.


She came back to reality, noticed that he was still starring at her, but also coming closer. He was doing the exact thing she had feared all those years. He would confront her. She has played this scenario a thousand times in her head, always different conversations, different places, different feelings. But now she couldn't remember, because this was real. She couldn't wake up from it and run away. She couldn't tell her head to shut up because he would be there, he would be real, and he would talk to her and she had no influence what they would talk about. And before she had even realized it he stood in front of her, his hand was reaching out for her, but she flinched back, the memories vivid and real present on her mind.


The morning came and he was gone. No he hadn't left her. He had to work. It was his duty. She had known that he had to leave, but the feeling hurt her. He was gone, after all the happiness from yesterday's event. But when she looked down at her ring she knew he would come back. After all this was his promise to her. To love her through everything. And she had accepted to do the same. So she would do exactly that. Going downstairs she saw the kitchen table prepared with breakfast and a card standing on her plate.

I know this is probably not making up that I am missing. But I love you, don't forget that.


"Kensi." He whispered, snapping her once again out of her trance. "It's really you?"

"Yes." She just answered shortly. He had hurt her, and broke her heart.

"Can we please talk about it?" he begged.

"No, we can't. I don't see why we should." Her eyes fixed on him in a cold glare. Over the years she had gotten her strength back, and secured herself. He thought he could come and everything was good again? Then he had thought wrong, really wrong.

"I want to explain." He tried.

"And I don't need to hear it. You left me, after everything we've been through. And I shall just let you in again that you can do it once again? No thank you, I'm better than that." She snapped at him.

"I wanted to protect you. I did it all for you. I would've never forgive myself if I hurt you, it was for the best that I left you."

"You could've talked to me about it." Kensi replied, her voice strong and her eyes hardened. She was going through it all over again.


He came back. Just like he promised. And he loved her. But all the happiness started to fade. It left their relationship and it all began to tumble down. It broke and nobody was there to pick up the pieces. She tried, god she tried, everything she could. But it wasn't enough.

And Christmas morning he was gone, without a word, letter or anything that told her why.


"And what would I have said?" he was getting frustrated and she backed slightly away, she knew what he was able to.

"Exactly what you just told me. It was better than waking up on Christmas morning and seeing you were gone, everything that belonged to you – just gone. And I thought you would come back. God was I foolish. Days after I thought you were just somewhere to think. Clear your mind. Until I came to the point and realized you wouldn't come back. The day that my mind finally realized: Jack has left you, Kensi."

"I'm sorry." He said.

"Sorry won't work, Jack. And as much as I hate you, I have once loved you. And I wish you're happy. But whatever you intend to do now. It won't work. You can't get me back. And I am not open for friendship, because you have hurt me."

"Kensi, I just-" Jack started to say, but he couldn't continue.

"Mommy." A little girl, around the age of four, with Kensi's mismatched eyes and blonde curls came running up to Kensi and hugged her leg. Kensi smiled and lifted the girl up on her hip.

"Hey Princess." She grinned at her daughter.

"You have a daughter." Jack looked at the girl on Kensi's hip.

"Yes, I do. I learned to move on. And before you consider asking, no she is not yours." Kensi answered, feeling slightly weird with her daughter in her arms and her Ex in front of her.

"Okay." Jack just nodded, obviously still progressing everything.

"Mommy, who is that?" the little girl asked.

"Oh that is an old friend of me." She answered while her daughter.

"So, uh, you're a single mom?" he asked, and as if to answer his question Marty Deeks came up to them, carrying a two year old boy. He was a spitting image of his father except for the brown eyes.

"No." she grinned and Marty put his arm around her.

"Who is this." He whispered in her ear.

"Well Jack, it was nice to meet you again, but we have to go." She just said and left Jack standing there.

"That was Jack?" Marty asked.

"Yes."

"Well you clearly got a better taste now." He grinned.

"Oh you think the kids are yours?" she smirked back.

"That was low." He laughed.

"You asked for it." She just grinned.

"Yeah, I love you too." He smiled sarcastically.

"But you love me more." Their daughter protested.

"No, me." Their son argued.

"I love you all the same." Marty replied. "But you the most." He whispered in Kensi's ear and kissed her.

He had picked up Kensi's pieces and put them back together. He had fixed her and was now a part of her.

And all Kensi could think of was: This is a part of me that you never gonna ever take away from me.

Jack could try, but this is now, and he was the past.