Remembering Sunday.
Love? What is it? A four letter word that most of us live for, or even die for. Does it really exist? Or do we simply make it all up. Believing in nothing. Some might say love, is merely a waste of our time. Do you think there are atheists to Love like there are to religion? Is it really worth all the 'heartbreak' and 'pain' that it so often causes? Maybe if we forget about Love for just a second, we can all be happy. Doesn't make sense right? Wrong. Without Love we don't have to give our heart to anyone and watch them break it, or choose between two people because you don't love them. This is all the Views of one Mr. Harry Styles. The brown Curly haired fellow Never believed in love, and has convinced himself it doesn't exist.
You may be wondering how he brought himself to think in such a way. Well, his mum and dad split when he was young and impressionable. The last words that Harry ever heard his dad say was;
'Son, don't fall in love there's just to much to lose, If your given the choice then im begging you choose to walk away, Please don't let what happened to me and your mother happen to you' and since then Harry has built a wall around him letting no-one in and only caring for his mother and sister. Harry's mum, Anne has tried to tell him Love is not just a myth but a truly great feeling. Anne met Harry's step-dad robin when Harry was 15, and she truly believes he is the one. Where as Harry seen him as a passing phase and he will leave just like the rest of them. If his dad cant stay, why would this guy? He has no strings to the family. Harry is 18 now and Robin is still here, and he has just proposed to Anne.
There is However One person who is so completely the opposite of Harry and they think Love is the only thing to really believe in. Love is what is holding this world together. Without it you just cant survive. That person is Mr. Louis Tomlinson. He never personally found love, but has seen it and believes his princess will come around one day, he just has to wait. His mum told him to always Love and never Hate. His mother, Jay, died of cancer when Louis was 13. At that point Louis made a promise to himself to find His one Love, no matter how many tries it took, just to make his mum proud. Louis is 20 Years old this present day and he has found a girl who makes him incredibly happy. He is not sure if love is the word to use, but there is no harm in seeing where this relationship could go. Right?
Harry leaves his house to go to his first day of University. The cold air hits his face as his phone buzzes. Its from his sister.
'Good Luck today .x' he smiled at his sister, Gemma's text. After a 20 minuet walk Harry gracefully entered the University. Unfortunately he has no idea where he is going. He looks around like a lost puppy.
"You need help?" a soothing voice asked. Harry turned his head around. He was faced with a boy, with blue eyes and side swept hair.
"em, Yeah do you know where Mr. Galloway's lecture is?" he asked politely. The older boy smiled.
"I'm going to his lecture to. I'll take you there." Harry was alien to this treatment. He was usually and outcast so no one would dare to speak to him. Yet this boy was so inviting. "I'm Louis By the way" Louis Held out a hand.
"My names Harry." They both smiled and shook hands.
The two boys made there way to the lecture and took a seat.
"So, this your first day at Uni?" Louis brightly asked. Harry simply nodded.
"And yours?" Harry questioned. Louis let out a laugh.
"No, no. Its my second year. First year of studying English though." The boys engaged in some more basic chit chat about English. Harry felt welcomed by Louis, as if he could trust him. However Harry quickly brushed those thoughts to the back of his mind. He can trust No one but himself. The lecture dragged on but fortunately ended and everyone got up to leave.
"So Harry, Wanna go for some lunch?" Louis asked.
"yeah, Sure." Harry smiled. Louis sensed something strange in Harry. He has these pain filled eyes and Louis wants to take care of him and he has no idea why. He has just met Harry and he feels he needs to protect him.
The boys entered the empty café. Louis is determined to understand the mystery that Harry is hiding.
"Harry, Tell me a bit about yourself then." Louis bluntly said, which made Harry uneasy. He doesn't talk about himself much, or even about his past.
"Nothing really to say. I'm 18, Curly hair and love English." Louis shook his head.
"I could tell you that by just looking at you. What about family? Friends? Hobbies? Things like that." Harry's head protested with him not to tell him anything. Louis sensed the uneasiness in the atmosphere. "okay I'll go first then?" Harry Nodded. "Okay Well my names Louis Tomlinson. I'm 20, I Have 5 Sisters who stay with my dad, so I don't see them much. My mum died when I was young. And Oh I LOVE to sing." Harry envied everything Louis said. He seemed so open about everything. "You go now." Harry's thoughts where interrupted.
"Em...I Have a Sister. I stay with my mum and I like music." Louis smiled.
"what about your dad?" Louis asked. Harry hasn't mentioned his dad to anyone. No one ever asked.
H-He...I don't know." Louis knew Harry Was hiding something, but he knew more than what he did about the handsome curly boy 3 hours ago.
"oh. Well any ways. I better go. I said I would meet my girlfriend soon. It was nice talking to you Harry." Louis winked as he departed. Harry smiled contently which revealed his dimples. For the first time in a while, Harry felt...Happy?.
When Harry got home he was greeted by an unhappy mother.
"Harry Edward Styles! I told you to be home early so you could help Robin with shopping."
Harry rolled his eyes.
"why? He isn't my dad so I don't really care." He shrugged his shoulders.
"Robin is the closest thing to a dad and you will treat him like one! Don't give me your self Pity Harry. GO NOW!" Anne commanded. Harry Turned to face his mother.
"I'm not feeling sorry for myself im simply stating the truth! And you need to realise Robin will never be like dad. In fact, Maybe dad would still be here if you weren't such a Bitch to people." Harry's eyes filled with pain and hatred. He stormed out of the house and went to where he is most commonly known. The Clubs.
Many hours past and Harry was more pissed than Charlie Sheen. This was what he knew best. Getting drunk, sleeping with girls then waking up with a mild case of amnesia.
"Hey beautiful, wanna fu-uck?" Harry slurred to the blonde in front. She laughed
"No thanks. Maybe she might" She replied sweetly pointing to a slutty brunette. He nodded and danced his way over, leaving the blonde laughing and shaking her head.
"Hun you should see him over there. He is pretty upfront." She laughed. She turned to see Louis.
"That Looks like - Harry?" He questioned. The Blonde was none other than Louis' girlfriend Hannah.
"You Know Him?" she asked. Louis nodded and made his way over to Harry.
"Harry?" Louis cautiously asked. Harry's Head snapped round. Louis seen he was completely mad with it. "Harry, You okay?" He asked gently. Harry nodded
"Yup, Just y'know Dancing and that." He laughed which made Louis notice his dimples. Louis leaned into Harry's ear and whispered.
"Harry, I think you should go home. You'll thank me later." Harry laughed and placed his hands on Lou's shoulders
"Is that an invitation Mr, Tomlinson?" Harry raised an eyebrow.
"What? NO!" Louis Exclaimed, "I just meant get some rest." Harry shook his head before falling over. "That's it, im taking you home." Louis felt like he had to do something. No one gets that drunk just because of nothing. He draped Harry's arms over his shoulder and made his way over to Hannah.
"I'm sorry love but im gonna take Harry home." Louis said sympathetically.
"It's okay. I'll go see is Stan is here." With that Louis nodded and drove Harry to his place.
Louis put Harry in his Bed.
"There you go. Get some sleep okay?" Louis softly whispered. Louis felt a hand grasp his arm tightly
"Louis?" Harry's voice echoed throughout the room. "Stay with me?" His eyes pleaded with Louis. He nodded and shifted in beside Harry.
"Always" Louis whispered
"Night Lou. Your really amazing" Harry's words faltered as he drifted off to sleep.
"You to Harry, You too." Louis smiled and fell into a deep sleep with Harry.
The light peeked through the slit in the curtains. Harry's eyes parted slowly. His head pounded like a hammer to a Nail. He slowly sat up. His eyes glanced around taking in his surroundings, these unfamiliar surroundings. He glanced beside him. And saw no one there. He stood up and shuffled down the stairs. He saw a familiar face in the kitchen.
"Hey there" Louis said chirpy.
"What happened? Why am I here?" Harry asked hazily. Louis laughed and put some bacon on a plate for Harry.
"You were off you head last night. So I brought you here." Harry nodded and looked at his phone. 13 missed calls and 20 messages. All from Gemma. He pressed the call button and left the kitchen.
"Hey Gem. What's up?"
"DO NOT WHATS UP ME!" She screeched down the phone.
"What did I do?" He asked.
"Lets see, you have a fight with mum, storm out don't contact any of us and then you don't come Home!" She yelled.
"I'm sorry I stayed at a friends last night." He heard her sigh on the other end of the phone.
"Well come home soon yeah? And don't end up like last time Harry, I hate seeing you like that." Harry rubbed his neck with his hand
"i promise Gem. That was Old me." He hung up and went back to Louis.
"You okay?" Louis asked worried. Harry nodded
"Just my sister." Louis Nodded in acceptance.
On Saturday will have been nearly 4 Weeks since Louis and Harry Met. Mr Opposite as everyone likes to say. Louis made a realisation in his life, on that exact Sunday, He loves Harry. He knows its silly because he has only known him for 4 weeks but he just knows. Its just a gut feeling.
Louis has been trying to get Harry to open up a little bit more about himself hoping to find out if he likes im back, or even anything about Harry. However the only breakthrough he has had is when Harry finally told him he had a cat once. Not much of a breakthrough but louis is trying. Louis is at his final straw with Harry and wants to know him. He even moved Harry in hoping to get him to open up, or even slip up. Louis may just be able to do that.
"Hey Harry? Can I ask you something?" Louis said while walking into the living room. Harry turned off the T.V and nodded. "Have you like, ever been in Love?" Harry felt like he had been punched in the stomach. He shook his head all to abruptly. "It's just, I don't think I really love Hannah." He whispered. Harry faced away. "What do you think?" Louis knew he was getting somewhere and he wasn't letting Harry get out of this one. Harry shrugged.
"Maybe you do, maybe you don't" Louis was getting kind of angry.
"You must have seen couples in love then? Do we act like them?" Harry shrugged.
"Never seen those couples." Louis had enough. He made Harry face him.
"Harry! What is wrong with you. I feel like there is this big barrier when ever I talk to you. It is not a hard question!" Louis almost screamed.
Harry has never seen Louis like this, or anyone. So concerned for Harry yet angry at him. Harry never believed in Love so how should he know?
"I-I don't think Love is real." he stuttered. This left Louis in utter awe. Louis could not take the information in. Is this what he has been hiding? Is this why Harry never tells him anything?
"H-how? Its a beautiful thing." Harry stood up and laughed.
"Love is a Bitch, like my dad said 'don't fall in love there's just to much to lose, If your given the choice then walk away' So I have and it's a silly emotion people invented." Harry continued to walk but was pulled back by Louis.
"Harry, your dad taught you that?" Louis questioned hopping for Harry to crack.
"um...Yeah, but it doesn't matter who-" Harry was cut off by louis.
"It does Harry. The first mention of your dad and he taught you THAT?. You shouldn't think like that." Louis stepped closer and his eyes followed Harry's,
"Look I just don't think you need it. I have my own opinion." Harry argued. He didn't understand why Louis was so offended. Its a right to have your own opinion
"But, I just think your missing out on so much." Harry noticed something in Louis voice as he spoke, as if his heart just sunk.
"Louis im not saying you have to stop. If you find love then I'll believe you." He chuckled but Louis brought his Hands up to Harry's face. Harry started to tense up. But when Louis rubbed his thumb over his cheek, he relaxed almost instantly. He felt safe? No he couldn't. He felt the walls he has built since such a young age start to decimate slowly but surely.
"I just can't imagine why you would still think like that." Louis questions,
"Louis," Harry grabbed louis hand and pulled it away from his face. "Its just the way I was taught, and it will take a lot to change my mind." and with that Harry drifted into his room, with not another glance back. Leaving Louis to ponder in the events that has just taken place.
The next morning was awkward, Harry and Louis only past glances and the occasional uncomfortable smiles. How was Harry to act, this conflict has never occurred in Harry's life before. Why does Louis need to know so much? They hardly know each other. Harry scribbled some notes but they soon turned to song lyrics. This was the only thing that kept Harry sane. Without music Harry is nothing. Its the only true thing that stuck by him, never left his side when things got bad. It was his escape.
"Right Leave. Now.!" Mr. Galloway shouted. Harry shot up and left, as he couldn't face Louis, not right now.
"Harry? HARRY!" He heard the familiar voice shout. Harry sighed and stopped in his tracks. He felt a hand grab his shoulder. "Hey, you wanna do something? Like later?" Harry shook his head and walked on. No words, no conversation, Harry knew what he wanted to do tonight and I didn't involve Louis.
The music blasted throughout the club and filled Harry's ears with that all to familiar sound. He dance around looking for the next girl to pull, wasting the night away. The room spun around as Harry's intoxicated blood stream soured high, making him do things that seemed extraordinary to others, but Harry's second nature. He fell outside as his phone buzzed.
"Well, Hellooooooo!" He screeched into his phone.
"Haz? Harry not again..." Gemma worried down the phone. Harry sat down on the curb,
"You know, Gem-ma" He hiccuped, "Your soooooo lucky, because... you, you found love!" Harry felt a tear shed down his cheek, but quickly dismissed it.
"What do you mean Harry? Haz. Come home. Please." Harry laughed, hiding his teary voice.
"Why? Oh, so you can 'Help' me? Well guess what Gem? No one can save me." and with that, Harry dropped his phone and broke down. Maybe Louis was right, maybe Love is real, perhaps he even needs it. But why? His dad was a prime example of it failing. And after what he says, Harry has to obey him, no matter the circumstances. Love is Evil. Louis is evil. Why does he feel he needs Louis? He doesn't need anyone. He is Harry freaking Styles. Louis. All he can think about is Louis.
Louis heard a loud bang on his front door.
"All right all right. I'm coming" Louis slung on some jogger bottoms and ran down stairs. He slowly opened the door and his eyes where met with a very drunk Harry.
"YOU! You made me like, like this!" Harry exclaimed. Tears trickling down his face.
"Wait Wh-" Louis was cut off by Harry.
"I need you. And I hate you for it! Why did you have to show up huh? Why couldn't you have just left me lost, Instead of finding me, guiding me!" Harry stowed into Louis house.
"Harry, I don't understand." Louis furrowed his brows. "Why do you do this to yourself?" Louis questioned as he grabbed his face. Harry felt automatically safe, but then began to build up rage.
"This! This whole situation" He started to acknowledge the atmosphere that suffocates the room. "You make me feel safe, something completely knew to me, and I hate it!" Louis is taken aback by Harry. He quickly removes his hand from Harry's cheek.
"I-I'm sorry." Louis stuttered. His eyes fell to the floor as he shuffled his feet. Why did he have to be nice? For the first time he envied Harry.
"Don't act like you care. No one cares about me." Louis got infuriated. Of course he cared.
"I CARE! In fact I more than care." Louis strained grabbing Harry's wrists, Harry furiously shook his head.
"NO! No you don't." Harry tried to fight out of Louis grasp. Harry thought it was absurd that Louis actually thought of caring for him, For one he has no known him a long time.
"Harry, I-I made a promise to my Mum," Harry tried to fight Louis off but it was no use. "No Harry Listen to me, Please?" Louis pleaded. Harry simply nodded. "I made her a promise to find love. And I intend to keep that promise. But I cant, if you don't believe." Harry stood in confusion
"What do I have to do with it?" He asked, Louis looked flustered,
"Well, I-I... Look I cant find love knowing you don't think its real." Louis looked around the room sharply avoiding contact with Harry's green eyes. Harry searched Louis face.
"What are you not telling me Lou? How exactly does your point make sense. Of course you can find love, you don't need me." Harry answered innocently. Louis mentally laughed at the fact that he did need Harry.
"It's...complicated right now." he whispered dropping his gaze to the floor. Harry lifted his head with his hand, sending Louis shivers down his spin. Yip, this is Love.
"Please Lou, I know your hiding something. Just tell me." He kept a grip firmly around Louis chin so he could not leave him pondering.
"I-I may have found it, but-but it cant work." His eyes prickled with salt water.
"Oh, im sorry man, but there is nothing I can do". Harry slurred. Louis shook his head in agreement and Harry walked away.
"Love Me?" Louis whispered so Harry couldn't hear. This is breaking him everyday. Every time he feels there is a chance, his conscious mind laughs at the thought of him ever getting Harry, or even just making his mum proud.
The Sunday Dawn arose from the darkness, as the moon was laid to rest. Sunlight peeked through Harry's windows, causing the tired boy to rise from his comfortable bed. After last night, he was most certain seeing Louis was a horrendous idea. He did not know why Louis had the effect he did on him. The younger boy cantered down the stairs to find the masculine boy strumming a guitar. At first Harry did not listen until he heard the boy sing.
*He woke up from dreaming and put on his shoes,
started making his way past, Two In the Morning,
he hasn't been sober for days,
Leaning now, into the breeze,Remembering Sunday,
he falls to his knees, they had breakfast together,
but two eggs don't last like the feeling of what he needs.
His voice was mesmerizing. Like no other he had apprehended.
*Forgive me im trying to find my calling, im calling at night,
I don't mean to be a bother but have you seen this boy?
Harry was dumbfounded. Boy?
*He's been running through my dreams and its driving me crazy it seems,
im gonna ask him to be with me.
Harry's mind filled with the beautiful melody as he thought to himself 'He really is in love. Wonder who the Lucky guy is?'
Even though he doesn't believe in love, he's determined to call him bluff.
Who could deny these butterfly's that are filling his gut?
He pleads, oh he tries but he only denied now hes dying to get inside.
The words swirled around Harry for a while. He sighed, a bit to loudly as Louis stopped playing and snapped his head round. He came into contact with those sea blue eyes of the older boys. There was something their. It was as if the two souls were meeting at night time, with nothing but each other's presence to illuminate the darkness.
"How long where you standing there?" Louis itched the back of his neck in embarrassment. Harry shuffled forward. He looked in awe at the blue eyed boy.
"Who was that song for?" Harry asked upfront. Louis' eyes darted to everywhere in the room but Harry's face.
"N-No one." He stuttered. Lying through his teeth.
"Ar-are you gay Louis?" He asked again. Louis had to admire Harry's forwardness. The room fell silent so all you could here was the heavy breaths Louis was taking. "Are you? You know its okay if you are." Harry had a comfort in his voice that instantly made Louis relax.
"I-I don't know." Louis started. "I've developed feeling for a guy, but its just him. That's it. No other man,guy or boy." he finished with a weight off his back. True, he may not have admitted it was Harry, but it was one step closer.
"Maybe he just has something that no one else has." Harry informed Louis, oblivious to the thought in his head it could be him. Louis nodded and went to leave, but was jerked back by Harry's firm Hand. "Who ever he is, he is really lucky Boo." Boo He replayed Harry's nickname to him over in his head before running upstairs.
Harry nipped in for a quick shower, reminiscing Louis voice. It was so peaceful and relaxing. He began to re sing the words. As the lyrics faltered of his tongue, he noticed he was singing, something that gave him great happiness. All his worries washed away. Unfortunately, they did not leave for long, as Louis chapped the Door.
"Haz? Are you okay? You've been in their for half an hour." Harry's eyes widened, he did not even realise the length of time he was in their for.
"Um- Yeah, Just finishing." He flustered as he climbed out of the shower. He heard Louis laugh from behind the door.
"Harry? Where you doing something inappropriate?" Harry smirked in response as he opened the door.
"What if I was?" He asked. He didn't mean it to come out so seductively. Louis transfixed as Harry's breath hit his face.
"no-nothing, I was-y'know" he muttered. Harry laughed.
"For the record I wasn't doing that." He smiled as he left.
"Hey Harry?" Louis shouted after the younger boy. "Your a really good singer" he smiled. Harry felt the blood rush up to his cheeks. Ugh! That boy has something over Harry, he was so alien to this feeling.
Louis walked out of his door to be confronted by Gemma, Harry's sister.
"Louis...right?" She asked hesitantly. He nodded. She sighed in relief. "Good! I've been trying to find you forever. Have you seen Harry Styles? People say your pretty good friends?" She questioned. Louis comprehended telling her he knew where he was. He liked having Harry all to himself.
"Yeah I know him why?" He coldly stated.
"oh, em you wouldn't happen to know where he is? Its just our last conversation did not give me much leeway." She rushed. Louis sighed and opened his door back open.
"In here." Gemma's eyes lit up.
"Thank you so much! He can come home now." She smiled. Louis suddenly halted her.
"Why home?" He asked. Gemma stepped back unaware of what she may have said wrong.
"Be-because he needs to, our mother and father are sick worried." Harry emerged from the background
"You mean step-dad. I'm not coming home. Mum made it pretty obvious she doesn't want me. She wants robin." Harry spat his words at his sibling. Louis looked at Harry. "I have Louis now. All I need is him." Louis' eyes widened. All I need is him. Wow. That made him smile at the younger boy, which Harry gladly returned.
"Oh, so your happy with him but not me or mum?" Gemma hissed. Louis felt hurt at how inconsiderate she was.
"Him has a name and It's Louis. He has been more family in the past month than you have my entire life." Harry's words where venomous. However that was not the end of it. He grabbed Louis hand, "If you don't mind im going back inside considering im in a towel and its freezing, goodbye." He went to close the door but Gemma rammed it back open.
"If I'm not like family, why did you phone me when she broke your heart? Hmm? Was I just a random contact on your phone because im pretty sure I'm the only one who knows about Caroline? Does your bum buddy does" She darted her eyes to Louis. Louis was as confused as a boy in drag.
"Gem, don't." His words harsh. Louis looked in confusion. "oh right he probably gave you the whole 'I don't believe in love' well Harry did have a heart at one point."
"Please Don't Gemma" Harry pleaded.
"So he doesn't know? Oh lets fill him in. Once upon a time Harry fell in love, got played at his own game and guess what? Became .Dad." Harry slammed the door in her face not caring if it hit her. He began to feel the rage build up more and more, the frustrating tears spilling from his eyes. As he slid down the back of the door, Louis brushed his curls from his face.
"I'm sorry." Harry whispered. Louis let out a half hearted smile.
"Come on. Get changed before you get pneumonia." He helped Harry up but was embraced into Harry's Arms. He felt the younger boys arms tighten around his neck. "shh its okay," He hushed Harry as he felt the liquid from Harry's hair and eyes fall lightly upon his shoulder.
The rest of the day went by at rapid speed. Harry cuddled with Louis on he couch, making him feel significantly better.
"Lou?" He croaked. Louis looked down. "It's about time I told you the truth." He shifted so hi was now facing Louis. "Caroline, she was my first love, and only really. I gave her my heart and she shattered it. I was so broken, I wouldn't eat, sleep or go anywhere. It was only 2 years ago and I still remember it like yesterday." Louis went to speak but Harry stopped him. "I caught her with my best friend, just like my dad caught my mum. It was horrible, and since then I can't let myself love anyone. Until now" he silenced towards the end of the sentence. Finally Louis had gotten Harry to open up. Louis brushed his thumb over Harry's Cheek. His mind screaming 'Tell Harry Now'. "And Lou, when you sang that song, I realized something." He smirked and looked at Louis through his thick eyelashes. " I think I love you." Louis jolted back in surprise. He quickly untraced his hand from Harry's face, leaving Harry's cheek cold.
"you- you love me?" He laughed between words. Harry smiled and nodded in agreement. Louis grabbed Harry's face once more, but this time connecting their lips, making Harry lay back. Louis had wanted this for so long now. As they broke apart they both smiled in awe of one another.
"Does that mean you love me to? or..." Harry raised his eyebrows.
"Well obviously you idiot!" Louis exclaimed. Both boys realised, it would definitely a Sunday to Remember.
~ Amanda Buchan :)