End and Beginning
Summary: The path is the final destination. Jaina runs for the mere sake of running. And finally, she realizes. OneShot.
Warning: -
Set: Story-unrelated, Post-Fate of the Jedi
Disclaimer: Standards apply.
The world is racing past her in a blur of colors, sounds, scents and shapes.
Stretching out farther into the Force, Jaina leaps across a little ravine, summersaults over the river and comes down on the other side without even once breaking her stride. Stopping for a mere moment, she takes in her surroundings: the green forest of high trees, the wild flowers growing at the foot of the towering giants, the soft moss beneath her feet and the dew drops on the leaves of the bushes around her. The first birds sing, unaware of her presence. The water of the small river sounds like children's laughter. Filling herself with the sound of unblemished nature, taking in as much of the pure energy of life she can gather, Jaina lifts herself from her crouch and continues on.
The forest flies by.
In one swift motion, she changes direction and lets her feet continue running. There is no sound except the sweet morning song that echoes through the canopy of leaves, the noises of a waking forest. Her heart beats steadily. Her breath forms little puffs of frozen air in the damp, cool morning. She runs for the mere sake of running, of moving. Feeling more alive than ever, she lets the world slip past, continuing along an invisible path in the forest of her childhood. Yavin Four is as wild and abandoned as it ever was.
Jaina feels the Force all around her.
She sees it in the green of the trees, in the soft pink and yellow and blue and white of the waking flowers, in the brown feathers of a bird soaring past. She hears it in the wind and in her own blood rushing in her ears, in the sounds of the forest and the songs of the birds. She smells it in the fresh, clean scent of a world untouched by civilization. She tastes it in the clear morning air. She feels it deep within herself. Gaining even more speed, she jumps over a fallen tree and races on. Her feet drum lightly on the soft ground. She is so much one with the Force she doesn't even sweat.
The path is the final destination.
It's an old saying and many Jedi have interpreted it differently. Never really having thought about it until now, Jaina suddenly grasps its meaning completely. While the world passes in a blur, she realizes one thing: She is alive. And with that knowledge, a comforting weight seems to center itself in her. It feels like suddenly being caught in a gravity well after moving at zero g. Like finding the person one has looked for one's entire life. Like suddenly realizing the reason for being alive.
Jaina finds her center.
After having journeyed the entire galaxy it is Yavin Four, of all, that grants her absolution.
As she speeds up a little hill and races down the slope on the other side, she knows she has finally understood. Maybe Anakin would have been able to teach her earlier if he had survived. Maybe Jacen would have shown her if he hadn't lost himself to the Dark Side. Maybe this is why her parents still cross the galaxy in their ever-faithful Falcon and why Uncle Luke gave up himself for the sake of the Jedi. It is the path that carries the things one is looking for, not the destination. And now, here, she sees her path clearly in front of her mind's eye. It has taken her years to understand. Now, she believes.
Her journey doesn't end here.
It has only begun.
Filled with the Force so strongly she feels like weeping, she closes her eyes and lets her mind guide her. The trees, the plants, the animals – everything around her is filled with life. Peace settles over her entire being as she runs for running itself. The doubt she has carried for years seems to have dissipated entirely. All she can see is a vision of the future, bright and beautiful.
Jaina opens her eyes.
She can see a still figure standing at the edge of the woods. The sun is just rising, casting long, beautiful streaks of light across the world. It blinds her when she starts trying to look at the person directly. But there is no need to see when she can feel, and there is no need to feel when she knows by heart.
Taking the quickly shortening distance in a few strides, Jaina launches herself at Jag and feels the strength and warmth of her husband's arms around her.
She has come home.