Disclaimer: I own nothing of Love Hina, blah, blah, blah...
This fic is Rated R for extreme use of verbal language and some sexual content.
This is my first fic created so give me a settling chance k? :-)
Here's your legend:
"..." Displays someone talking
Blah blah blah Displays someone thinking
A line of ------------------- displays a complete scene change
A line of displays a flashback
The Narrator exceeds these boundaries though :-)
Well...enjoy!
A day too soon
It had started out like any ordinary day at the Hinata Inn. The inmates were settling down to the nice and cool breeze that winter night had to offer. Keitaro was leaning over the balcony, gazing upon the city lights and took in all its glory. Keitaro sighed and wished that his life would soon get better before Christmas at the very least. All the other Hinata inmates were either getting drunk, studying their asses off, or were playing around with each other...there was no one to comfort poor Keitaro and his problems. He was getting bad grades, he had practically no relationship with any of the Hinata residents, and on top of that, he has absolutely no money to spend at all whatsoever. Keitaro looked back up into the dark nocturnal sky and heaved a big breath of fresh air to be frozen before his face, like his dreams and luck. Keitaro saw a shooting star above him, and these were his exact words...
Keitaro: "Ah, beautiful star...at least give me one last chance to do things right. I wish there was someone here who could help me out with these problems". sob
Keitaro collapsed his head against his chest and almost began to cry. He then lugged himself back to his room for some nice winter rest...reserving his energy for what is coming the following day.
Chapter 1
Hinata apartments, 8:09am
Keitaro: yawn (half asleep) "damn...that was one nice piece of ass Naru had...I wish I could have a dream like that all the...WHAT THE HELL?! WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?!" Keitaro lunges forward from his sleep to land softly in the lap of...someone.
???: "yo man what's up? had a nice rest?"
Keitaro: "The fuck do ya mean I had a nice rest? Where the hell did you come from? How did you get in here?"
???: "You left the door open you dumb ass"
Keitaro: "That doesn't give you any right to come in here!!!"
Motoko: jumps through the wall and screams like a psycho "Keitaro!! I heard a scream! Are you being perverted again? 'cause if you are...uh? what the hell?" Motoko suddenly finds herself floating in mid-air.
???: "Don't mess with Keitaro bitch!" The mysterious man has his hand raised in Motoko's direction.
Motoko: "Who the hell you calling bitch, bitch!"
???: "I could very well take that sword and shove it up your ass...but I'm sure Keitaro wouldn't want that," The man turns to Keitaro and smiles.
Keitaro: "Uh...stop looking at me like that" sweatdrop "Listen...that was very nice and all..."
Motoko: "What the fuck did you say?!"
Keitaro: "...but who the hell are you and why are you helping me?" Motoko snarls at Keitaro.
???: "My name is Charles...of course that isn't my real name, but I kid you not, my real name is so hard to pronounce that you'd spend eternity just TRYING to figure out how to say it"
Keitaro: "Ok...and why are you here?"
Charles: "Because you wished for me to do so"
Keitaro then becomes petrified by what Charles said. Keitaro then begins to remember what he was doing last night on the balcony.
Keitaro: "Holy shit...my wish came true..." begins to jump up and down "MY WISH CAME TRUE MY WISH CAME TRUE MY WISH CAME TRUE MY WISH CAME TRUE MY WI..."
Su: bursts through the door and attempts to kick Keitaro in the face "Hiyas Kei...huh?" notices she's floating as well "HEEY this is pretty fun!!!! Funny-looking guy!! Are you doing this?!?!? Could you please show me how?!?!?! Do you have any bananas?!?!?"
Charles: "Holy shit, calm down!" Charles then claps his hands twice and literally zips Su's mouth shut.
Su: "Mmmmph!"
Charles: "'k, now that's settled, what do you want to do today Keitaro?" smiles
Keitaro: "Well first I gotta get changed and have some breakfast...yknow, why dont you make yourself at home and wait for me in the kitchen ok?"
Charles: "As you wish," bows then vanishes into thin air
Motoko: "HEEEYYY WHAT ABOUT US?!"
Su: "MMMPHH!!"
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Charles: flying around the house Hmm...this place is very interesting...it's a very big house I might add. continues to fly around I wonder where the other girls are...according to my commander, there were supposed to be...begins to have a flashback
Commander: "Ho! What's this? Charles!! Another wish is being made! Come here quick!"
Charles: "Right away sir!" runs into the room "What is it that you wish of me?"
Commander: "Charles, this is like any other mission, you must complete this man's wish and return promptly"
Charles: "Like I always do sir"
Commander: "However..."
Charles: "What is it sir?"
Commander: "I'm sorry to do this to you so soon, but...you're going to be given another Triple-A mission"
Charles: "WHAT THE FUCK?! YOU REMEMBER WHAT HAPPENED WITH THAT GIRL DONT YOU?!"
Commander: "..."
Charles: "Come on Commander! How can you do this thing to me?"
Commander: "I'm sure that you will find this wish quite rewarding...you may be able to come back a happy man this time"
Charles: "No Commander...there is nothing that would ever make me happy! NOT NOW NOT EVER!"
Commander: "The boy's name is Keitaro, he's about 20 years of age and his wish is very vague, so I'll need you to grant his every wish until he is 100 satisfied"
Charles: "I'm sorry Commander...I told you..."
Commander: "Although to make things easier he lives at the Hinata Inn with a certain number of inmates as well...these residents seem to be causing him trouble...so all you gotta do is make sure that they are put in their proper places,"
Charles: "Commander! Please try and understand!"
Commander: "The names are as follows: Naru Narusegawa, Motoko Aoyama, Shinobu Maehera, Haruka Urashima, Mutsumi, Sarah, Kaolla Su, Kitsune Konno, Mei, a turtle whom they call 'Tama-chan', and...that seems to be all"
Charles: "!!!"
Commander: "Yes, they are all females and some do not visit there...as presented with last names, those are whom you must be very cautious with,"
Charles: "She...that girl...." begins twitching
Commander: "Ah...it seems like you remember something lad" takes a deep sigh "It may be nice for you two to meet again wouldn't it?"
Charles: "...fuck...fuck..." begins to rapidly twitch
Commander: "Well Charles? Will you take on this mission?"
Charles: "..." begins glowing blood red
Commander: "You know very well what this is going to bring...other than the massive sum of the pay I'm sure that you wouldn't..."
Charles: "I WILL KILL THAT MOTHER FUCKER!!!!!!!!!!!!" bursts of energy fly all over the room destroying most of everything inside it except himself
Commander: just barely dodged all the bursts of energy "cough cough I see...your mission begins at sunrise..."
Charles: still flying around Hmm...I wonder where she could be...it's been almost seven years since last time...according to the rules she would've forgotten me by now... without looking where he was going he suddenly ran into a wall
Narrator: Ya, ya I know that's random.
Charles: "OW!" Charles gets up and begins to walk instead of fly "Hmm...it still hurts..." upon walking around some, Charles had stumbled upon what seemed to look like...the hot spring bath!! and he could hear some voices inside
Kitsune: "Wow Naru! Your boobs have become so big!"
Naru: "Stop it Kitsune! That...that tickles!"
Haruka: "Oh would you two please stop it already" begins to light a cigarette "Listen, you grope each other every single day, I'm surprised that neither of you are lesbians" beings to smoke
Naru: "Well it's not me that's doing it!"
Kitsune: "Come closer Naru dear..."
Naru: jumps out of the hot spring splashing water all over Haruka's face "Get the hell away from me! How come you're always drunk whenever I see you?"
Charles: "Well now ladies...you gotta calm down some" steps inside the hot spring room
Everyone but Charles stops their movement and stares at him.
Charles: sigh "Now I see why Keitaro has so much trouble with you people" doesn't notice that everyone but him is naked
Naru: begins to glow deep red "I don't know who the hell you are...where the hell you came from...and what the hell you're doing here...but I'm gonna kick that sorry perverted ass of yours!" begins running forward
Charles: sigh "You are so predictable" vanishes
Naru: stops "Huh? Where the hell did he go?"
Charles: "Looking for me dear?" smirks He's standing behind Naru!
Naru: "Grrr...I don't know how the fuck you did that, but you're going down!!! NARU PUNCH!" lunges towards Charles
Charles: "Hmph! Amateur" vanishes again
Naru: misses the punch and trips over herself and lands on her face
Kitsune: "OOOHHH That's gotta hurt!"
Charles: appears besides Kitsune "Why thank you my dear fox, I'm glad you liked that so much"
Naru: gets up "You son of a bitch!!" obviously she's pissed off right now.
Charles: "I do not wish to fight you under these circumstances..." raises his hand above his head "hmm..." a blue ball of energy forms in his hand "YOU WILL REGRET FOR MAKING THIS MOVE!" the ball of energy gets bigger "COASTAL TYPHOON!!!" The ball of energy grows massively large and huge spurs of wind begins to fly around Charles "TODAY YOU WILL DIE BITCH!" The water from the hot spring begins to diminish and is absorbed by the energy ball "GOODBYE!" Charles ready's himself and takes a step back before tossing the massively large ball of energy towards Naru's face.
Naru: "SHIT!" Naru attempts to dodge the attack but unfortunately gets absorbed by the watery sphere.
Charles: manically laughing "SO! How do you like that huh? No bitch like you will strike out at me and attempt to even put a scratch on these new designer clothes!"
Naru: struggling within the water sphere
Charles: "I hope you do realize that humans can only hold their breath for so long Naru, I wonder how long you can hold yours?"
Naru fingers Charles.
Charles: chuckles "Do what you want and..."
Keitaro: "STOP!!!"
Everyone but Keitaro: "HUH?!"
Keitaro: "DAMMIT CHARLES! I told you to wait in the kitchen and all you do is cause trouble! Release Naru this instant or else Motoko's sword will be up YOUR ass!"
Charles:: sigh "As you wish" bows Charles raises his hand and the water sphere then disappears into thin air.
Naru falls to the ground naked gasping for air.
Keitaro: "Are you alright Naru?"
Naru: gasp "You...PERVERT!" punches Keitaro into outer space
Keitaro: "WHAT THE FUCK DID I DO?!....................." continues to fly
Charles: "My, my, my...he saves your pitiful existence and all you do is punch him in the face? Geez...no wonder he has so many troubles"
Everyone but Charles: "Umm..."
Naru: Glares at Charles, grabs her clothes and walks away.
Kitsune: "Shit..."
Haruka: "...I swear this place is possessed or something..." begins to smoke
Charles: "Huh, oh well...I guess I better get going to the kitchen" begins to hover "See ya ladies later" And with that Charles flies off in to the distance.
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Shinobu: singing "I wonder what to make today" giggles
Sweet, innocent Shinobu, singing to herself in the kitchen is getting everyone's meals ready for the day...little does she know that there's an unexpected visitor coming to see her.
Charles: flies in "Yo! You must be Shinobu"
Shinobu: "EEEEK!!!!!!" jumps up and throws all the plates perfectly on the table
Charles: amazed "woah...didnt know humans could do that"
Shinobu: "Umm...ummm...umm..." gets flustered
Charles: "Ah, well, my name is Charles...I'm a new resident in the Hinata Inn, glad to meet you" smiles
Shinobu: still flustered "Umm...umm...umm...I...I...I'm Shinobu...n...nice to m...meet you" bows
Charles: Wow...this girl is so damn polite! And she's very pretty too! But...the commander told me to watch out for her...I wonder why he said that?
Shinobu: "Umm...I'm sorry...I'm still cooking breakfast...do you mind waiting for a bit?"
Charles: "What? Breakfast? Oh yeah! That's right!" Stupid jet lag "Hey do you want me to help you out with it? I'm not that great of a cook but at least it would keep me occupied"
Shinobu: "Umm...s...sure..." gets flustered again
Charles: "Kick ass! Well? What are we waiting for? Let's get cookin'!" gives thumps up
So both Shinobu and Charles head into the kitchen.
Shinobu: "Umm...alright...you can get the chopsticks and set them out on the table..."
Charles: "Huh?? I thought I was gonna cook!"
Shinobu: "Umm...alright...you can get the fish from the fridge..."
Charles: "Uh...I THOUGHT I was gonna cook!"
Shinobu: "I...I'm sorry...please...forgive me" begins to cry
Charles: Holy crap! Is she ever emotional! "Listen...uh...I'm sorry about raising my voice like that..."
Shinobu wipes her eyes.
Charles: "Why dont I just measure the ingredients and stuff ok?"
Shinobu: smiles "Teehee, alright then!"
Charles gets whatever he needs for the food and measures whatever he needs and gives Shinobu the things.
Shinobu: smiles "Teehee...thank you very much"
Charles and Shinobu begin to mingle and share various stories with each other. Although Charles had to make up some things whereas Shinobu would know of his real existence. After a couple of minutes the breakfast was ready to serve.
Shinobu: "Alright then" smiles "Let's get the table ready"
Charles: "Well the plates are in place already thanks to your efforts"
Shinobu and Charles walk back to the dining area and see that Keitaro (somehow) was there and was accompanied with Naru, and Kitsune.
Shinobu: "Huh? Where's everyone else?"
Keitaro: "Well...Sarah is off with Seta, Haruka felt like smoking, Mutsumi is still sleeping, and as for Su and Motoko...umm..."
Charles: Ah crap I totally forgot about them! Charles then snaps his fingers.
Meanwhile in Keitaro's room.......
Motoko: sigh "Being mad at Keitaro sure is tiring...I hope that son of a bitch comes back and releases me from this retarded trap"
Su: "Mmmph! Mmmmmmph!"
Motoko: "You're right Su...this does suck...it sucks my ass!!"
Su: Notices a glowing aura around her "MMMM!"
Motoko: "Huh? What is it S...WHAT THE HELL?!" Motoko sees an aura around herself as well "I dont know if this is good or bad"
Both Motoko and Su vanish into thin air and re-appear in the kitchen where they fall flat on their faces.
Shinobu: "Ah! There you are" doesnt even notice how they got there
Keitaro: "Oh! Well! Looks like they're here!"
Motoko: "You're dead Urashima!...once I get some food"
Su: "FINALLY! I can talk again!!!!! OOHH!!! FOOD!!! ME WANT EAT NOW!!!" jumps onto the table and gobbles up her share along with Motoko's and Naru's
Naru and Motoko: "HEY!!!!"
Charles: "uh...ok then! Let's eat huh?"
Everyone except Naru and Motoko ate their breakfast and cleaned up their plates and got some water and got ready for another new day. Shinobu was going out shopping while everyone else was chilling in the living room.
Naru: "So Mr. Charles sir...mind telling us what the fuck is going on?"
Charles: "Please...just...calm down..."
Motoko: pointing her sword at Charles "YOU WILL FREAKIN DIE IN YOUR SLEEP!!"
Charles: "heh...not likely..."
Keitaro: "Please...just...calm down everyone..."
Naru: "Shut the fuck up!" punches Keitaro straight in the face
Keitaro: "Owww! Yo Charles! I wish for Naru to punch herself in the face!!"
Naru: "WHAT?!"
Charles: "It shall be done" raises his hand and casts a spell "MANIPLUATION!"
Naru uncontrollably raises her fist, turns it in her direction and...punches herself in the face.
Naru: "OW!"
Keitaro: "heehee...I've always wanted to see that"
Kitsune: "Man...this could get really interesting"
Charles: "Well...I might as well explain things to everyone if they would just shut the fuck up and calm down k?"
Motoko: "Grrr..." lowers her sword and sits down on the couch.
Naru: Gets up and sits on the couch.
Kitsune: Lays back on the couch
Charles: "Ok..." clears his throat "My name is Charles...but my real name is Zklippmundhuftittar...I'm 17 years old and I am able to cast magic beyond anyone's imagination up to this very day - I am able to control all the elements on this planet including others so you dont wanna mess wit me! I live on the planet Flerrent, a planet just like this one, except we are able to exceed your levels of intensity and can actually focus our energy under intense training and able to cast magic just like I can...but...that's about all I will tell"
Naru: "Ok...thanks for introducing yourself...but why are you here?"
Charles: "Last night, Keitaro made a wish....a wish to be happy"
Motoko: "Aw come on! You cant seriously mean that! Keitaro's just happy right now...arent ya?" smiles Motoko elbows Keitaro in the stomach.
Keitaro: "Ouch..." grabs his stomach
Unexpectedly, Mutsumi comes rushing into the room topless, with her breasts flying in every which direction.
Mutsumi: "Excuse me! Has anyone seen my clothes? All I could find are my pants and panties..."
Keitaro: gets a royal nosebleed "HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!!"
Naru: Punches Keitaro in the face "PERVERT!!"
Mutsumi: "Oh? and you are?" points in Charles' direction
Charles: "...Keitaro made this wish very loud and clear it seems...and I have come from my planet to grant that very wish and all others he may wish from me...to ensure his complete happiness"
Kitsune: "Now THIS is interesting...of course I wouldn't mind if Keitaro wished to sleep with me and have endless nights of sex...
Keitaro: "You know...that isn't a bad idea..."
Naru: "Dammit guys! If you keep this up and with Mr. wish-maker here, what do you think Mei will be like when she comes to visit? You guys are just impossible to deal with!"
Charles: "...!"
Naru: "What? What is it?"
Charles: "Uh...Mei huh? That's a very nice name...yeah...heheh..." sweatdrop
Naru: "..."
END OF CHAPTER