Tsukiko/Shizuka:Enjoy!
He felt dirty,tainted.. He still distinctly recalled how he had hurt her in the Chunnin exams.
She had forgiven him, of course. Hinata-sama was so compassionate that she might even forgive her killer. Yet... he had hurt her, and he still felt so tainted, so wrong. How could he hurt an angel? He didn't know.
He did have a reason for it, despite what anyone might have said. A reason he would keep anyone from finding out.
He regretted hurting her, yet, he hoped to do it again.
It was the only way to touch her, to feel her, to know if she truly was there. Then, he would know that she wasn't just a dream like the ones he had so often. Yet, so unlike the dreams, the touches weren't kind, but brutal and pain filled. He wished he didn't have to.
He didn't just do it to touch her. He did it to keep her and others from realising his true feelings.
It was in her eyes. She understood that he was trying to reach out towards her. Somehow, that made him inflict even more pain.
He wished he could hold her and never let go.
All he did was hurt her. There was beauty in those touches, as much as there was pain.
He desperately needed to feel her. Why was it forbidden for a Main house member to fall for a Branch house member and vice versa? He didn't understand; he never would. Why did such a rule exist in the first place?
No one else would understand. It had become their way of bonding. It was a way to show that they cared. That they loved each other.
"Neji-nissan,"Hinata asked softly, "would you train with me?"
No one but them would understand. Every punch was a caress, every kick was a hug, and every stab was a kiss. It was the only kind of touch permitted, the only kind of touch given.
She said that she would absolve all the ridiculous rules and regulations in their clan someday.
"Of course, Hinata-sama."
Perhaps then they would be able to touch openly, lovingly. He doubted it, yet he still wished that it was true. He knew that to have hope was to have disappointment. He had to hold on to hope. There was nothng else to live for. His tenshi would someday be his and his alone.
If he told anyone that he cared for her, they would probably laugh.
Hinata and he would hurt each other because it was their only way to show affection.
When it came down to it, he hurt her not because he didn't love her, but because he couldn't.
A/N:What do you guys think?